u/spakata_fskertah

I just got violated on the tram..

I got home shaking, tears in my eyes and just kept disassociating and staring into to abyss when my mom asked me what's up with you.

So for the first time in my life, I told her. For the first time, I was done being silent when stuff like this happens.

I told her exactly what happened: tram was full, felt something rub against me, thought it was nothing since it's crowded, until I felt something inbetween..
I moved forward but it followed me so I turned sideways and looked down only to realise what it was and I was horrified. I tried to stand further away from this filthy creature

At first I thought 'allr let's give this man the benefit of the doubt, It's crowded after all maybe I didn't see properly, maybe it's all just in my head'

some people got off the tram and it's way less crowded now. I see him do it again to another girl even tho there was more than enough room for him to stand back. At this point I just had to step in. So I pulled her back and said at loud in english 'that guy is standing against you, way too close and he did it to me too, come stand here'

He was holding eye contact with me, both looking angry at eachother. I cut the eye contact after a hot minute, not only because I was disgusted but also because I was legit scared. He looked like he could murder me on the spot and I am in a foreign country. He got off at the next stop (right before mine)

When I vented about this on the sub off the city it happened in to warn other women and give a description of this donkey, it got taken down instantly.

Some people told me to report him. When I told my mom I want to report him because there's camera's everywhere, she said 'let it be now, don't embarass us'

she didn't even comfort me properly. I was shaking.. she said 'I thought something bad had happened to you'- as if this isn't something bad... how bad does it need to get? I know there's worse things in life but at least she could acknowledge how it made me feel at that moment.. tell me that my feelings are valid..

This exact reaction is why we don't speak up. Told my mom and my aunt. My female cousin was with me when it happened. Nobody felt the need to tell my uncle, stepdad or male cousin..

Why?? Why is there such a taboo around speaking up about what happens to us women? This is why some off us get raped and still remain silent. Sometimes yearss on end..

Before some pigs are gonna say in the comments that I must have provoked him, I am a hijab wearing woman who dresses modestly and keeps to myself, not the loud type that tries to get attention at all, the second girl was wearing shorts... so it doesn't matter to these kind of filthy people who you are or what you're wearing as long as you're a woman.

I just got violated on the tram..

I got home shaking, tears in my eyes and just kept disassociating and staring into to abyss when my mom asked me what's up with you.

So for the first time in my life, I told her. For the first time, I was done being silent when stuff like this happens.

I told her exactly what happened: tram was full, felt something rub against me, thought it was nothing since it's crowded, until I felt something inbetween..
I moved forward but it followed me so I turned sideways and looked down only to realise what it was and I was horrified. I tried to stand further away from this filthy creature

At first I thought 'allr let's give this man the benefit of the doubt, It's crowded after all maybe I didn't see properly, maybe it's all just in my head'

some people got off the tram and it's way less crowded now. I see him do it again to another girl even tho there was more than enough room for him to stand back. At this point I just had to step in. So I pulled her back and said at loud in english 'that guy is standing against you, way too close and he did it to me too, come stand here'

He was holding eye contact with me, both looking angry at eachother. I cut the eye contact after a hot minute, not only because I was disgusted but also because I was legit scared. He looked like he could murder me on the spot and I am in a foreign country. He got off at the next stop (right before mine)

When I vented about this on the sub off the city it happened in to warn other women and give a description of this donkey, it got taken down instantly.

Some people told me to report him. When I told my mom I want to report him because there's camera's everywhere, she said 'let it be now, don't embarass us'

she didn't even comfort me properly. I was shaking.. she said 'I thought something bad had happened to you'- as if this isn't something bad... how bad does it need to get? I know there's worse things in life but at least she could acknowledge how it made me feel at that moment.. tell me that my feelings are valid..

This exact reaction is why we don't speak up. Told my mom and my aunt. My female cousin was with me when it happened. Nobody felt the need to tell my uncle, stepdad or male cousin..

Why?

Why is there such a taboo around speaking up about what happens to us women? This is why some off us get raped and still remain silent. Sometimes yearss on end..

Before some pigs are gonna say in the comments that I must have provoked him, I am a hijab wearing woman who dresses modestly and keeps to myself, not the loud type that tries to get attention at all, the second girl was wearing shorts... so it doesn't matter to these kind of filthy people who you are or what you're wearing as long as you're a woman.

I just got violated on the tram..

I got home shaking, tears in my eyes and just kept disassociating and staring into to abyss when my mom asked me what's up with you.

So for the first time in my life, I told her. For the first time, I was done being silent when stuff like this happens.

I told her exactly what happened: tram was full, felt something rub against me, thought it was nothing since it's crowded, until I felt something inbetween..
I moved forward but it followed me so I turned sideways and looked down only to realise what it was and I was horrified. I tried to stand further away from this filthy creature

At first I thought 'allr let's give this man the benefit of the doubt, It's crowded after all maybe I didn't see properly, maybe it's all just in my head'

some people got off the tram and it's way less crowded now. I see him do it again to another girl even tho there was more than enough room for him to stand back. At this point I just had to step in. So I pulled her back and said at loud in english 'that guy is standing against you, way too close and he did it to me too, come stand here'

He was holding eye contact with me, both looking angry at eachother. I cut the eye contact after a hot minute, not only because I was disgusted but also because I was legit scared. He looked like he could murder me on the spot and I am in a foreign country. He got off at the next stop (right before mine)

When I vented about this on r/istanbul to warn other women and give a description of this donkey, it got taken down instantly.

Some people told me to report him. When I told my mom I want to report him because there's camera's everywhere, she said 'let it be now, don't embarass us'

she didn't even comfort me properly. I was shaking.. she said 'I thought something bad had happened to you'- as if this isn't something bad... how bad does it need to get? I know there's worse things in life but at least she could acknowledge how it made me feel at that moment.. tell me that my feelings are valid..

This exact reaction is why we don't speak up. Told my mom and my aunt. My female cousin was with me when it happened. Nobody felt the need to tell my uncle, stepdad or male cousin..

Why?? Why is there such a taboo around speaking up about what happens to us women? This is why some off us get raped and still remain silent. Sometimes yearss on end..

Before some pigs are gonna say in the comments that I must have provoked him, I am a hijab wearing woman who dresses modestly and keeps to myself, not the loud type that tries to get attention at all, the second girl was wearing shorts... so it doesn't matter to these kind of filthy people who you are or what you're wearing as long as you're a woman.

I just got violated on the tram in turkey. I'm here with my family.

I got home shaking, tears in my eyes and just kept disassociating and staring into to abyss when my mom asked me 'malk'

So for the first time in my life, I told her. For the first time I was done being silent when shit like this happens.

I told her exactly what happened: tram was full, felt something against my ass, thought it was nothing since it'd crowded, until I felt something inbetween my cheeks.. I moved forward but it followed me so I turned sideways and looked down.. khona m9aym.. I moved all the way.

I thought allr let's give this man the benefit of the doubt..

some people got off the tram and it's way less crowded now. I see him do it again to another girl even tho there was more than enough room for him to stand back. I had to step in so I pulled her back and said at loud in english 'that guy is standing against you, way too close and he did it to me to, come stand here'

He was holding eye contact with me, both looking angry at eachother. I cut the eye contact after a hot minute. He got off at the next stop (right before mine)

When I vented about this on r/istanbul to warn others and give a description, it got taken down instantly.

Some people told me to report him. When I told my mom I want to report him because there's camera's everywhere, she said 'safi khaliha, bla mat chawhina'

she didn't even comfort me properly. I was shaking.. she said 's7abt w9a3 lik chihaja' - phal hadchi li w9a3 liya rah walo, 7aja bsita.. I know there's worse things in life but at least acknowledge how I feel at this moment..

This exact reaction is why we don't speak up. Told my mom, my aunt and my female cousin was with me when it happened. Nobody felt the need to tell my uncle
, stepdad or male cousin..

Why?? Why is there such a taboo around speaking up about what happens to us women? This is why some off us get raped and still remain silent. Sometimes yearss on end..

Before some pigs are gonna say in the comments that I must have provoked him, I am a hijab wearing woman who dresses modestly and keep to myself, not the loud type that tried to get attention at all, the second girl was wearing shorts... so it doesn't matter to these kind of filthy people who you are or what you're wearing as long as you're a woman.

My post got deleted from r/istanbul so I had to pist this here to make sure other women are safe.

I just got violated on the tram from eminonu to yusupasa. The guy is wearing a red tshirt and black joggers, blue eyes blond hair and tattoos. (+/- 20h30)

He was standing tooo close.. actually yk what I mean. I moved but he followed, so I stepped away and turned sideways.

A few people got off the tram and it was a little less full but still I saw him stand against another woman even tho there's more than enough space.

When it happened to me, I gave him the benefit of the doubt, but when I saw him to it to another woman, I had to step in.

I pulled her back and said at loud in english 'come stand here this guy is standing way too close to you and just did it to me as well'

She was confused as to why I pulled her back because she didn't speak english. He held eyecontact with me for a hot minute both looking angry at eachother before I broke the eye contact.

He got off on the next stop. (The one before yusupasa)

If you are this guy and you are reading this, I hope it gets cut off you pig.

Not throwing shade at istanbull at all btw, this is a beautifull city and I love it here, I'm just trying to protect other girls

For the ones who are gonna say I provoked, I'm a hijab wearing woman who dresses modestly, the second girl was wearing shorts... it doesn't matter to these pigs what you are or what you wear, being a woman is enough to harass or touch you without consent.

Some people said to report it as there are camera's everywhere. Can anyone tell me where and how I report this? I'm leaving in 7 hours, but I want justice to be served or at least make an effort to prevent more victims

I just got violated on the metro from eminonu to yusupasa. The guy is wearing a red tshirt and black joggers, blue eyes blond hair and tattoos. (+/- 25min ago)

He was standing tooo close.. actually yk what I mean. I moved but he followed, so I stepped away and turned sideways.

A few people got off the metro and it was a little less full but still I saw him stand against another woman even tho there's more than enough space.

When it happened to me I gave him the benefit of the doubt, but when I saw him to it to another woman, I had to step in.

In pulled her back and said at loud in english 'come stand here this guy is standing way too close to you and just did it to me as well'

She was confused as to why I pulled her back because she didn't speak english. He held eyecontact with me for a hot minute both looking angry at eachother before I broke the eye contact.

He got off on the next stop. (The one before yusupasa)

If you are this guy and you are reading this, I hope it gets cut off you pig.

Not throwing shade at istanbull at all btw, this is a beautifull city and I love it here, I'm just trying to protect other girls

For the ones who are gonna say I provoked, I'm a hijab wearing woman who dresses modestly, the second girl was wearing shorts... it doesn't matter to these pigs what you are or what you wear, being a woman is enough to harass or touch you without consent

Edit: It was on the tram. sorry, I'm not used to public transport. Might be why this shocked me so much, I'm sure it happens often sadly

For context, I (F24) met this guy(26) in morocco in may. Let's call him 'E'. We hit it off well and discovered we live in the same country and we're both just visiting for vacation. Hence why we added eachother in IG and gave this a true shot.

We bonded over things we have in common. Everyday we discovered something new we have in common, same birthmonth, same goals in life, same hobbies, same situation growing up, even same bloodtype. However he did lie about being mixed race like me (the literal first thing he said when we first met) but I let it slip.

We talked for a month and then he asked about my ex. Since we we're just freshly broken up (nov), I didn't talk sh*t about him. Back then I still respected my ex, he broke up with me because he thought I deserve better (his words). When I was telling E all that happened and how we broke up, he asked when we broke up. When I said nov last year, he was devastated and said he wished I would say '1-2years ago'. He didn't like the fact that it's pretty fresh and kept asking me if I moved on. I said I did. We didn't fight over it, said our goodnights and he hung up.

A few hours later my ex (28) let's call him 'M', called me in the middle of the night. He was clearly on something and started confessing everything. He confessed he was cheating with a coworker and felt guilty and that's why he broke up with me and said I deserve better. This man... I used to respect him soo much and I honestly believed he was the only person who'd never cheat. My whole reality shifted that night. Only to think I was talking high off him just a few hours ealier. I didn't cry, I laughed. I was shocked and relieved. I could finally let go and process.

The next morning E told me that our talk off last evening did not sit well with him and that the way I talked about my ex was like I still love him. (I didn't love him but I did respect him before he confessed and I appreciated our time together). He said that a relationship of 5years and half is not nothing and that 6 months after a breakup is too soon to start dating again and therefor he wanted to cut all contact with me. He said 'If I had a girl who talked about me the way you talk about him, I would never let her go'.

I wanted to tell him about what my ex confessed soo bad and to tell him that I lost all respect for M and that I feel nothing for him, not even hate. M was like a stranger to me now because I thought I knew him but I don't. I decided to keep my mouth shut and respected his decision because I thought it wouldn't change a thing.

One week later he texted me that he missed me and we started talking again. During this time he said I should move out of my parents home and change my number. He said you're still in the same place and you have to change to grow. In june I flew back to morocco and he asked me to be his girlfriend to which I said yes. After a month (july) he flew back home (we're not doing LDR he was just on vacation and goes back and forth between morocco and home) and we met again and I stayed over for a few days.

During my stay, I had two missed calls from M and a text that said 'I know ur doing it on purpose'. I showed E the msg and told him I don't want anything from him I just want my money back. (Important note I forgot to write, M borrowed money from me when we we're still together but I'm still waiting on it). E told me respond with 'me not picking up means I don't want to talk'. Instead I wrote 'everything you can say on call, you can say in text'. I showed E the msg and said that this is less harsh and I don't want him to think 'F her and her money'.

E started pushing to change my number again. A week ago he said he has a date in his head and if I don't change my number by then, he'll delete me from all socials and not even say a word. He flew back to the country we met in a few days ago. Today I told him I'm not changing my number as long as we're not taking any steps towards engagement or at least getting to get to know eachothers families. I told him as soon as I we're getting engaged, I would change my number and no one of my family would find it weird. But for the time being I'l just block my ex. If I change my number now everyone will know there's a reason behind it and I don't like lying.

Anyway he said I took a huge load off his shoulders and that he used the date just to lie to himself. He said I made my decision and he made his. He said he's happy I told him before the date (I don't even know what the date is) and that I said it while he's back in morocco.

I said it's sad he's acting this way but I respect his decision and I'm not gonna beg him to stay.

I don't think he's wrong for wanting me to change my number but it feels like he doesn't trust me. Changing my number is a huge deal especially since all legal documents are linked to it and it's even used to identify you online. It would take a long time to change it in every system and to tell everyone I changed it while I could just block my ex. I don't think it's worth it for a relationship of 2 months.

Edit: LTDR: a guy I'm dating for 2 months and know for 3 months wants me to change my phonenumber because my Ex called me and texted me and I showed him. (My ex still needs to give me money back and said he would in the following months.) He now blocked me because I said I won't change my number for him this ealy into the relationship and that I would just block my ex. Am I in the wrong or is he?

For context, I (F24) met this guy(26) on vacation in may. Let's call him 'E'. We hit it off well and discovered we live in the same country and were both just visiting for vacation. Hence why we added eachother in IG and gave this a true shot.

We bonded over things we have in common. Everyday we discovered something new we have in common, same birthmonth, same goals in life, same hobbies, same situation growing up, even same bloodtype. However he did lie about being mixed race like me (the literal first thing he said when we first met) but I let it slip.

We talked for a month and then he asked about my ex. Since we we're just freshly broken up (nov), I didn't talk sh*t about him. Back then I still respected my ex, he broke up with me because he thought I deserve better (his words). When I was telling E all that happened and how we broke up, he asked when we broke up. When I said nov last year, he was devastated and said he wished I would say '1-2years ago'. He didn't like the fact that it's pretty fresh and kept asking me if I moved on. I said I did. We didn't fight over it, said our goodnights and he hung up.

A few hours later my ex (28) let's call him 'M', called me in the middle of the night. He was clearly on something and started confessing everything. He confessed he was cheating with a coworker and felt guilty and that's why he broke up with me and said I deserve better. This man... I used to respect him soo much and I honestly believed he was the only person who'd never cheat. My whole reality shifted that night. Only to think I was talking high off him just a few hours ealier. I didn't cry, I laughed. I was shocked and relieved. I could finally let go and process.

The next morning E told me that our talk off last evening did not sit well with him and that the way I talked about my ex was like I still love him. (I didn't love him but I did respect him before he confessed and I appreciated our time together). He said that a relationship of 5years and half is not nothing and that 6 months after a breakup is too soon to start dating again and therefor he wanted to cut all contact with me. He said 'If I had a girl who talked about me the way you talk about him, I would never let her go'.

I wanted to tell him about what my ex confessed soo bad and to tell him that I lost all respect for M and that I feel nothing for him, not even hate. M was like a stranger to me now because I thought I knew him but I don't. I decided to keep my mouth shut and respected his decision because I thought it wouldn't change a thing.

One week later he texted me that he missed me and we started talking again. During this time he said I should move out of my parents home and change my number. He said you're still in the same place and you have to change to grow. In june I flew back to the country we met in and he asked me to be his girlfriend to which I said yes. After a month (july) he flew back home (we're not doing LDR he was just on vacation and goes back and forth between 2 countries) and we met again and I stayed over for a few days.

During my stay, I had two missed calls from M and a text that said 'I know ur doing it on purpose'. I showed E the msg and told him I don't want anything from him I just want my money back. (Important note I forgot to write, M borrowed money from me when we we're still together but I'm still waiting on it). E told me respond with 'me not picking up means I don't want to talk'. Instead I wrote 'everything you can say on call, you can say in text'. I showed E the msg and said that this is less harsh and I don't want him to think 'F her and her money'.

E started pushing to change my number again. A week ago he said he has a date in his head and if I don't change my number by then, he'll delete me from all socials and not even say a word. He flew back to the country we met in a few days ago. Today I told him I'm not changing my number as long as we're not taking any steps towards engagement or at least getting to get to know eachothers families. (In our culture it's taboo to have a relationship you should get engaged). I told him as soon as I get to meet his mom and I'm sure we're serious I would change my number and no one of my family would find it weird. But for the time being I'l just block my ex. If I change my number now everyone will know there's a reason behind it and I don't like lying.

Anyway he said I took a huge load off his shoulders and that he used the date just to lie to himself. He said I made my decision and he made his. He said he's happy I told him before the date (I don't even know what the date is) and that I said it while he's back on vacation.

I said it's sad he's acting this way but I respect his decision and I'm not gonna beg him to stay.

I don't think he's wrong for wanting me to change my number but it feels like he doesn't trust me. Changing my number is a huge deal especially since all legal documents are linked to it and it's even used to identify you online. It would take a long time to change it in every system and to tell everyone I changed it while I could just block my ex. I don't think it's worth it for a relationship of 2 months.

So she's obsessed with this egyptian doctor who recently died. He's advising people to not eat veggies, chicken, eggs, milk products and some other things. But tells people to eat chocolate and rice etc.

Idk if he's onto something or not but my whole life I've been told to eat veggies and protein and exercise.

The thing is she has diabetes, has been following this new diet and stopped taking her insulin. She can do whatever she wants but she's forcing me to follow this diet too, since she feels 'so good'.

My biggest issue is I'm a gymrat that is currently cutting and I need high protein meals with low calories.

Chicken and eggs is basically all I eat along with veggies. I do believe the chicken we eat today is kinda sus but I gotta hit my protein goal

Idk what to do or what to eat anymore

Everytime I try to get to know someone I back off pretty early before even seeing any red or green flags.

I either completely forget the other person exists and forget to open their messages for like 4 days or I just straight out tell them I had a change of heart and am no longer interested in marriage.

I'm not even that busy but it takes so much mental energy to consistently text someone every day, the only thing I manage to do consistently is praying and gym. I feel like I don't have the energy to spend on another human, let alone more than one if we were to have kids

Could it be that I'm scared of commitment? Or am I just burned out?

Salaam peeps

I'm going to marrakech and casablanca very soon with a friend and since this would be her first time going to morocco, I want it to be unforgettable

Firs 4 days we're staying in marrakech, haven't found the right hotel yet but we're looking

Last 4 days will be spend in Casablanca

So she thinks the sahara is in marrakech and wants to go ride camels and quads (for as far as I know the sahara is pretty far away from marrakech)

So are doing camel and quad rides still possible around marrakech? I've seen the glamping tours but I don't want to waste 3 out of 4 days

Then Casablanca, is there like a private beach where girls can sunbathe without men around?

Is there a place where they teach you how to surf?

Also maybe a good bowling place?

Oh this friend gets food poisoning very easily so if anyone knows what I can avoid or what food places are decent please let me know

Any tips or idea's are very much very welcome