Yes, I have a blackhole where my penis should be. No, the noise from the fireworks does NOT cover the immense sucking sound that fractures the sense of peace in all who hear it. Yes, I will keep trying. THANK YOU!
The fuck is wrong with you people. I timed the last firework I heard at 2:37am last night and I haven’t heard even a Walmart throw popper since. Don’t YOU ALL KNOW we are in a drought?!?!? How the fuck are we supposed to burn this shit to the ground with y’all sleeping on this opportunity!?!?! Gawd damn I’m seriously disappointed!
I'm devastated. Denver used to be a thriving metropolis of world class food and a tolerant friendly culture. But it burned to the ground last night all cuz some selfish fucks wanted to celebrate their despicable nations heritage. It's GONE! We 👏 were 👏 in 👏 a 👏 drought 👏!! Didn't you all know the entire rest of the state was on fire? Now all of Colorado is DESTROYED!
all we can do is carry on
ok who wants to go to petsmart
Was most of the way done with setting off my $24000 worth of illegal Wyoming fireworks and decided to check the Nextdoor app to make sure all my neighbors thought I was really really really cool. 😎
Turns out this other native was not a fan so we shut down the show early to accommodate a single person. I even called the every person in the entire city to get them to stop too because. Thank god we all saw this post on Nextdoor, otherwise fireworks could have gone on all night.
I feel like 2 months expired isn’t enough and weekend BST visits just aren’t cutting it
Truly our best first responders
I saw some people in a parking lot playing with sparklers with their kids. Despicable. I called the FBI. That happy family deserves to be drawn and quartered because I’m a sad, lonely curmudgeon.
While cool I don’t think they captured the puckered butthole we all know so well
Remember next time when I'm trying to take an afternoon nap