r/Netherlands

I’m a Brazilian woman and I’ve been in a relationship with my Dutch partner for almost 12 years. We lived together in Brazil before moving to the Netherlands 3 years ago.
Marriage has always been important to me, and over the years I tried to talk about it many times. He would always get very uncomfortable or irritated whenever the topic came up.
Back in Brazil, we eventually signed a legal partnership mainly so he could have visa rights there. Even during that process — despite it being full separation of assets — he seemed very defensive and suspicious about the terms and translations.
Recently, after many years together, I finally started understanding why he never wanted to marry me. He admitted that one of the reasons was because he didn’t see me as financially equivalent to him.
That honestly broke my heart. I never saw relationships as a financial competition, especially after building a life together for so many years and moving countries together.
Now I’m wondering if this is something cultural that I maybe never fully understood, or if this is more about him as an individual.
I would genuinely appreciate honest Dutch perspectives about marriage, finances, and long-term commitment.

PS: He has a normal job, no major assets, just a mortgage to pay and a possible future inheritance. Nowadays my salary is almost the same as his.

Dozens of products sold by the Netherlands’ two largest supermarket chains contain pesticides that are banned by the European Union, according to a new study.

An analysis of 64 products on sale in Albert Heijn and Jumbo branches found that 49 of them, including tea, rice and spices, contained traces of pesticides.

Foodwatch, the independent food standards watchdog that carried out the study, said that in 45 cases the chemicals were not permitted for consumption in the EU.

In 14 cases the products contained higher levels of pesticides than the EU limit, meaning they should not have been on sale.

The worst offender was Verstegen’s mild ground paprika, which contained 18 different pesticides, half of which were on the EU’s banned list.

Food producers based in the EU are allowed to use pesticides that are banned for domestic consumption if the products are exported to other countries.

Boomerang effect

Foodwatch has called for all trade in banned pesticides to be outlawed across Europe and said supermarkets should “take responsibility” by using their market position to ensure their suppliers do not send them products that breach the rules.

Last year the EU promised to step up food safety controls to stop residues of banned pesticides coming back into Europe through imported products – the so-called “boomerang effect”.

But Foodwatch said the new measures were inadequate because they “would only cover a small portion of pesticide substances and would require an individual impact assessment every time the residue limit of a substance is to be considered”.

I'm from a southern European country and people love to smile at and say hi to young children on the street. It's cultural and it's seen as a warm gesture, the parents like it too. For example if people are waiting in line and there are small kids around, some people will interact with the kids and everyone smiles.

I've noticed that, for the most part, people ignore other people's kids in the Netherlands, so I'm wondering if it's frowned upon to interact with stranger's kids?

Note: I'm specifically talking about situations where the parents are present with the kids, not when the kids are alone, for example at school, walking home by themselves or playing in a playground.

I have yet another broken Miele device. the 5th time in 10 years.

Miele offer different repair options.

the dryer is 8 years old, we paid 1200 euros for it.

I see 3 options and would love to hear your opinions:

- should I go for the Miele €349 fixed price (part and labour included)

- should I trust another (unofficial?) repair company than Miele?

- should I just buy a new one? I could add 300 euros on top of the €349 repair budget and buy a new one from Samsung (same energy label: C).

Last year, when the Miele washing machine broke down we chose the 150 euros (+ labour + parts) repair option from Miele (their recommendation) but it was wasteful, the repair man gave up trying to repair and we paid €180 for nothing.

On a side note, I can't resist but rant at Miele.

This is our 4th Miele appliance that breaks down in less than 10 years.

• An expensive (€1249) Miele induction stove broke down twice in its first 4 years (2nd time outside warranty).
• 2 years ago another expensive (€1199) slimline dishwasher broke down after 8 years of very limited use (kids left the nest 4 years and it's only used on some week ends)
• the (€800) washing machine died last year
• the (€1200) dryer died this year

We honestly take good care of our products, our water is very good quality and we do the regular anti-calc maintenance.

I'm a laughing stock at with my friends, co-workers and families. I proudly bragged at Miele and that it will last 15 to 20 years when their Asian shit would break down in 5 years.
They spent half my budget and they stuff still work after 8-10 years.

My parents still use their samsung washing machine after 14 years!!! It never broke down and is far better than our Miele (noise, functionality). We actually bought a samsung last year and I love it.

I'm at a point where I specifically avoid German brands (cars, tools) when I buy something. it's amazing how things have changed in a decade!

For context, I am the only immigrant in my team of about 10 people. I am white (Eastern European to be more precise) and non-muslim so I guess not really on PVV’s radar for now but I also don’t speak Dutch.

I get along well with everyone on my team and since I’ve been there for a few years now nobody really pays attention to the fact I’m the odd one out. And there is this one guy who told me a couple times that he only votes PVV and wouldn’t think of another party.

But here’s the thing: he’s super nice to me. Not even the corporate fake nice, he actually seems genuine. He offers to help whenever he can, a few times when I was visibly having a bad day he checked on me and tried to help, and even throws good words about me to the manager (which he does for other people too tbh).

We have smoke breaks together and we talk about a thing or two. Politics don’t come up very often, but his stances on taxation and privatisation made me think if this guy even knows what he’s voting for cause they don’t really match with the right.

I feel so conflicted about this guy. Is he one of those who made PVV his identity without giving it too much thought? Am I just “one of the good ones” in his eyes? Could I actually get him to change his stance if we go deeper in these discussions?

Has anyone experienced anything like this?

Hello. I’m southern italian but I think dutch people think I’m arab. I have black hair and features that could remind of Middle Easterners.This is not an issue ofc I’ve been to the middle east and their cities are cool their food is amazing and the people are among the kindest.Though I noticed that when I enter in shops people treat me badly, they always think I want to steal. I got to a point where I’m anxious before entering a shop because of that.
Do they do this with everyone or just with foreigners? Could it be due to the fact that they think I’m Arab?
If it’s like this I can’t imagine how actual middle easterners get treated, that’s sad

my mom flipping at me for staying out late f20 i stayed out late with a friend she doesn’t believe i was actually with that girl even though she spoke to her on the phone she’s completely raging at me and screaming she wants to die this month of hajj?
i live in the netherlands and i need help anyone know any organizations or ways to move out fast????!!

Sadly I can’t sleep but now it got me thinking. I’ve moved to the Netherlands not long ago, what are some things other immigrants (here to stay) were mind blown by?

Like I know about the bike culture, snack culture, the circle birthdays, trains, the boy hairstyle, races, all the basic stuff you read everywhere online but what are some things I wouldn’t expect to be super Dutch that will maybe still be coming my way?

Would you support a Dutch boycott of Israel in general?

hi, my mom will be visiting me on the 26th which is mother’s day in poland, and we’re going to amsterdam. i wanted to take her out for sushi but i genuinely have no idea where to eat good sushi 😭 tiktok recommendations were kinda mid. my mom likes sushi with tempura / deep fried elements more than very plain traditional sushi, idk how to explain it properly but she likes more “fun” rolls instead of super minimalistic ones. does anyone have recommendations for places like that in amsterdam? also it’s next week so i’d appreciate recommendations where i can maybe still make a reservation in advance 🫶

Does anyone else have this experience? I just returned home from a two-week holiday and saw a letter from Stedin informing me that my energy contract had ended, and my energy would be cut off in 14 days. Stedin explained that someone had started a contract in April or May under my address and terminated it, leaving me without a contract after that. I did received letter from an energy company with unknown name but I never opened it. Because that’s not my letter and could be a scam.

Now I feel the process is way too flaky, how possible someone can transfer others energy contact without any evidence of residence or agreement with previous contract owner in the address? Am I missing something here?

Hi!

I am on day 12 of recovery from gallbladder removal surgery. My surgery was done at BovenIJ in Amsterdam. I had 3 visits the emergency since the surgery of which one was rhe most awful experience in my entire life and I am going to start a legal action towards this hospital. But something more important and urgent is happening…Since day 7 I started to have pain across my abdomen (everywhere) but mainly in the middle and my upper right quadrant and radiating back pretty similar to the gallbladder attacks.

Finally managed to see my surgeon yesterday but I am totally lost with their approach…

I have super tender to touch spot, ultrasound report says there is liquid and debris in the gallbladder bed, all my liver enzymes are elevated along with my billurubin… She thinks its okay and nothing to be worried about, some patients do have slower recovery and if I have a stone it may pass…

I cannot grasp this approach. I live on my own, my mum came to take care of me and we thought by 3rd week i should be fine but I am still dependent on others. Moreover they don’t even offer CT or MRI to make sure that there is no stuck stone but relying on ultrasound only which does not give clear diagnosis in these cases…

I want to cry, I feel like this won’t ever pass, they don’t check me properly or take my symptoms serious and I will find myself in a more horrible position down the line with needing ERCP etc…

Please help 😔 anyone experienced the same before? If you are in the Netherlands you can help particularly better, I want to maybe ask for a second opinion but I don’t know the process nor which hospital to request in Amsterdam area for better approach..

But today the surgeon said she doesnt have time for it if my symptoms carrying on then I should go to emergency, but i need department referral for second opinion. I am just super stuck please someone help me 😭

Thank you! 🥺

Guys, I heard the song “All That She Wants” on the radio again recently and immediately thought of a TV show I used to watch all the time 10 years ago. The song was in the intro. I spent an hour talking to ChatGP, but we couldn't figure out which program it was. As far as I remember, it was about a fairly large family, and if something unusual happened or something, the image would be frozen, and I made a DIY frame out of it in the edit. If anyone is reading this and thinks "I know which program you mean," let me know. Big thanks in advance to anyone who knows.
Oh yeah, and it was made for teenagers.

My wife (who is Dutch) has been offered to move with her company to the Netherlands (the Hague). We have a 5 year old boy, who understands Dutch, but speaks it less than English. While the job is in the Hague, we could move to Delft, Rotterdam, Leiden, etc, as well as the Hague. We'd like him to integrate into a Dutch primary school.

What is the situation for finding a place at a (reasonably good) Dutch primary school in the Randstad for September? Are the schools oversubscribed? Any advice welcome.