I’m currently at a 4th of July party with friends but ever since I realized what I am I’ve been fighting to wait until I at least started doing something to show it. But now I’m several drinks in and want to scream it from the rooftops! How do I avoid forcing everyone in my conservative hometown to deepthroat the fact that I’m trans?
Im 13 and have identified as ftm since 2023. I need to come out and I dont know how id do it, my mom and a few on her side of the family are sort of accepting but everyone else is just homophobic and insanely conservative (on both sides..) my father is the one im scared the most to come out to since he alr has bad feelings against me for dressing masculine. I just really want to get on puberty blockers so this dysphoria stops for a bit. Im thinking I might send my mom a thing saying "hey mom im trans" with some other shit but idk. If anyone has tips please help
19, AMAB, questioning my gender identity.
TLDR: I dont know if I should choose myself and my own identity, or my family.
I feel like Ive only just started to question my gender identity but I feel like when I look back into my childhood there were quite a few signs pointing to me being transgender or genderfluid.
I came out to my girlfriend of over 2 years that I was questioning and she has been really supportive. We’re both Pan so I know she wont give ip on me or anything but it still makes me scared for our future. Shes done my makeup and dressed me up and I genuinely feel pretty and hot for the first time in my life.
But I’m terrified. I’m terrified of what my family will think of me if i ever came out. I’m terrified that they’ll hate me or disown me or even if they do love and support me that everything will change. I’m scared that I’ll never pass bc I’m 6ft tall, hairy asf, i semi-deep masculine sounding voice, and boney as a mf.
My girlfriend and I both know that we do want kids but I’m scared that if we have a son that he wont have a positive male role model to look up to. And if he does, I’ll be jealous that it isn’t me.
Not to mention my phobia of needles. I know HRT has other ways like pills and patches but I’d still need routine bloodwork done do make sure my hormones are balanced.
I’m also afraid of the political climate and people wanting me dead but I feel like everyone feels that way.
For a while, I told myself “Maybe in the next life” or “Maybe in another life” but when I think to myself, “What if this is it? What if this is the only life I get and then it’s over?” I want to transition right away.
I just want to know what I should do. I’m a bit of a pushover so I usually put my family first but this is such a big decision that I can’t help but think about the rest of my life and my happiness.
so I'm having doubts about being trans but i still really want to be a girl like if i could press a button to turn me into a girl i would press it without any thought and i want a vag for pleasure and for wearing lingerie and for more countless reasons but i just dont know like im fine with my male body and the clothes like it doesnt bother me but i want boobs i want to wear crop tops i want to wear skirts i want to do makeup i just wish i was born a girl instead i hate being trans i get in my mind 24/7☹️, it brings down my mood all the time, and other thing is i think the reason might be im scared to go through with it and then realize that im not trans while im on hormones and i loose my fertility or anything im just very scared and confused what are your thoughts on this please help. another thing is i dress up as a girl in roblox but i have 0 intentions on changing back to a guy avatar i never liked guy avatars
Hi friends! My partner of 2.5 years is finally getting top surgery next month. After several years of trials and tribulations, we are both very excited yet nervous.
I want to show up for them as best as possible by making them meals for post op, bring comfort and being financially prepared (we live together). Their love language is definitely acts of service. I’m coming here to see what your friends, family or loved ones did to help that stood out a lot for you during your post op period.
I was thinking of putting a “menu” together of what they want to eat after surgery, but I’m not sure what to start with. Any foods I should avoid? Any advice would be so helpful! If this question isn’t allowed, please let me know.
I am a fifteen year old cis (bisexual) male, and i have recently began to think about the possibility that i might be trans. On one hand i want to be a girl, i think i could express myself better if i was a girl, there are also some things that i would like to explore that i think i would be more comfortable with doing as a girl (i know that sounds weird). On the other hand i'm afraid that that is not a good enough reason, and im also not feeling any body dysmorphia (i dont think so at least), i dont particularly like having a p*nis but i can live with it. I also dont hate being a boy, existing at all isnt really great but i guess im fine with the way things are, and i dont know that i would be happier as a girl, but maybe. i should probably also mention how these feelings started (bare with me for a second). I started roleplaying as a women on chat ai apps... (yeah did i mention i hate myself?) and im worried that these feelings are actually just me being influenced by... that
its all very confusing and i could really use some guidance or help or really anything at all if anyone has any it would be great.
(sorry for bad grammar)
L
I am 15 and I am currently home alone. I have no car or money to go get something to help. I was YouTube and saw some girl who looked nice and I wish I could look like her. I feel like crying because I look so masculine and I hate it. Seeing that girl made me just disappointed in my body. What do I do?
I often see posts saying they wish they wouldve had an early transition. What does early mean? What specific age?
I am travelling soon and need to know if I should pack my (spectrum outfitters) foam packer in my carry-on or my checked luggage. I have never travelled through the airport before with a packer. Will taking it through my carry-on bag require a search?
This turned out quite a bit longer than I imagined, but when I started writing it sort of all came out. I’m holding out hope someone will still read it ❤️
Hi. I haven’t been fortunate enough to grow up in a diverse community, and don’t really have anyone I’m comfortable sharing this with yet, but I’ve had this weighing on my chest for a long while. I guess what I’m asking is if anyone can relate to my experience, or know anyone who does. A lot of these things feel silly, and awkward to share, but I need to share them with someone, and would rather take the risk of being made fun of at this point.
I guess the first “sign” of this was that I’ve always preferred playing as female characters in video games. I sort of shrugged this off as a horny teenager thing, but it’s persisted as I’ve gotten older, and it doesn’t really feel like that anymore. This fascination or fantasising about being a woman has also expanded into other media and even sexual fantasies.
Then there’s the issue of my body. I’ve always hated my body, always been uncomfortable showing skin. To be fair, I was a fat kid, and for a long thought I felt like that was the reason for this, but even as I grew older, and at some point was quite fit, it just never felt right. I don’t really know how to explain it, but it doesn’t feel like my body. I look in the mirror and it doesn’t look like me. It’s gotten to the point where I kinda dissociate from my body at points, and try to forget what I look like.
I’ve also always felt more comfortable around women. I’ve never lived with another man, besides my father, and at one point I lived in a collective of four girls and me. It’s not that I’m uncomfortable around guys, I have plenty of male friends, but I feel more at home with, and like I can relate more in some way, to women.
Romantic relationships have been a huge issue, and while I’ve loved plenty of people, I’ve hated being in relationships, and hated myself in those relationships, and I’m starting to realise that has been the root of most of them ending.
There are also some things that I don’t really feel comfortable sharing, and you probably don’t want to read about, but they are firmly in the NSFW department of things, so I’m sure you can fill in the blanks.
Now to the other side of the argument. I have struggled with periodic depression and anxiety, and these thoughts and feelings are highly prevalent during these periods, alongside other highly irrational thoughts and feelings.
I was also quite old when I first started to really think about this, around 25, and besides the things I’ve mentioned, I’ve always felt like a man. A feminine man perhaps, but still a man.
The fears running through my mind is that this is just a fetish, or that it’s just a phase, or I guess even that I just crave attention, and that I’ll regret doing anything once it’s too late. And I’m terrified of talking to anyone I know, especially my family, in fear that they won’t accept me.
And while the idea of transitioning feels liberating in some ways, it also scares the shit out of me. Both the social aspect of my friends and family, and the idea of learning how to be a woman without any community, and a bit of social anxiety to make it even harder.
Alright, that’s my rant. Sorry it went on a bit long, but I really, really appreciate anyone who takes the time to read and reply. ❤️
Hi dolls, I’m 19 and have been out as a tgirl for over 3 years now. I’ve never cared much for bottom surgery but lately I’ve been feeling dysphoric about it more. I’ve transitioned a lot (not medically although I am on a waiting list to see a doctor about hrt!!) and have been told I pass and it’s one of the last parts of me that hasn’t changed with my transition. I really just want honest advice and info about bottom surgery. I have a few questions but any other information would also be appreciated
What’s the recovery process like?
How does it look compared to a natural one? Like does it look natural
How does it affect sex / masterbation
What are the risks with getting it done?
What’s it like living post op compared to pre op overall?
I am a 18yo AMAB who discovered was trans 5month ago.
But transitioning in my current location and society is completely impossible. I really wish i could transition as early and fast as i could because of the irreversible changes testosterone is doing to my body slowly. I already regret not realizing i was trans before puberty. But sadly i didn’t and i have to live with that truth now.
Anyways, I was thinking since i have no possible way to transition in my country right now, is there a way were i could stop testosterone production in some ways. I am having constant dysphoria to every reaction tied to testosterone in my body.
Are there like some natural products i could consume or routines i could do to at least decrease testosterone production and increase estrogen levels. Because i have literally reached to the point where every time i get in the shower i would hold the scissors at my nuts and actually think about cutting them.
So I (18M) have had gender dysphoria for around 4 years now. Now I know that may sound like an obvious yes, but the reason I’m asking this is because it’s like a constant on and offness that is kinda hard to explain.
It started as just a slight feeling when I was about 14-ish and it gradually got worse. For about 3 years it wasn’t that bad, (on a scale I’d put it on a 3-4 out of 10) on and off. It could last weeks to months on either, and it finally went away a few months after I turned 17. This was until about 6 months later, when I ran out of my medication.
(Quick side note: I have a rare muscle condition called Myotonia Congenita that makes my muscles stiff and lock up, the same thing fainting goats have. For it, I take mexiletine, a heart medication that can also help my condition. However, side effects can also affect the nervous system, and from that, the brain. It takes about two weeks to come in, marking me have to experience the withdrawal symptoms when it ran out, and the early side effects when I got back on it)
During this, I was emotionally a mess, and it ended up causing my gender dysphoria to come back, only this time way worse. (About a 6-9 out of 10) it caused me to cry in bed at night it was so bad, and the methods I used to suppress it and get red of it before wouldn’t work anymore. I told myself that it would go away when the early side effects got done, but it didn’t. It lasted another 2 weeks, a month total before going away again, and I thought it was over. But then, 2 months later it came back. Now, about 4 months since then, it’s back to the on and off that it was. (Back to about a 3-4 out of 10, sometimes 5 or 6 out of 10.) and I really don’t know what to do. It’s gone away before, and I don’t wanna do anything too early. What if I finally decide to become trans, and the desire to be a girl goes away after I do too much? These reasons is what’s been stopping me from deciding anything, but now that it’s starting to become on again, I really need some advice.
Also, sorry for the longness of it and sorry if any of it sounds offensive or hard to understand, I’m not good with words.
I feel like I’d be better off as a trans girl, what are some tips or what can i start off with?
I'm 23 and recently started taking my trans thoughts more seriously. I live in a house where at least one or two members of my family are always present. It also isn't the world's most spacious of houses, so I'm curious to know if there's any good ways to experiment with presenting as fem that people won't notice.
Stuff like trying make-up and clothes aren't terrible ideas, I have given them a shot in the past, but they're hard to be subtle with. So if anyone is in a similar situation or has any advice, let me know!
Thanks for reading <3
Hi everyone,
I’m 18 years old, assigned male at birth, and I come from a very conservative family and culture where being transgender is considered unacceptable. Until about five months ago, I didn’t even know what gender dysphoria was. Looking back, though, I think I’ve been experiencing it for around four years, although it became much more intense during the last five months. Interestingly, during the past week it has decreased quite a bit for no obvious reason, which is one of the reasons I’m still questioning myself.
I’m hoping to hear from people who have gone through something similar, especially if you questioned your gender for a long time or came from a conservative background.
I grew up as the oldest son in a family with very traditional expectations for men and women. I was also a very introverted child. After moving to another country when I was young, I became even more isolated and spent most of my free time playing video games. Looking back, I don’t feel like I paid much attention to myself while growing up. I barely remember puberty because I was so disconnected from my own body and focused almost entirely on games.
My family has always expected me to become the typical man in our society: work, provide, be tough, and eventually support a family. My father often brought me to work with him from a young age because that’s what boys are expected to do. I remember constantly telling him I wanted to stay home instead. He would always respond with things like, “Men don’t stay at home. Only women do.”
At the time I didn’t consciously think, “I belong with the women.” I just knew I hated being outside pretending to be masculine, being called “young man,” and feeling like I had to fit into that role. Even when my computer was taken away, I would rather stay home helping my mother with household chores than go to the store.
About seven months ago I started medical school, and around the same time I made some major lifestyle changes. I quit video games because they no longer interested me, stopped watching pornography after struggling with it for about three years, and returned to hobbies I used to enjoy like drawing, piano, reading, and journaling.
Having more quiet time made me start paying attention to myself for what feels like the first time.
I began noticing how uncomfortable I felt with my body. I dislike my facial hair, body hair, broad ribcage, masculine appearance, even and for the most part my genitals. Shaving my beard and legs gave me an unexpected feeling of relief and happiness. Growing my hair out also felt much more natural than cutting it short.
Around that time I also started thinking seriously about my future. I realized that I had never related to the traditional male role expected in my culture. I don’t identify with most of the expectations placed on men, and I found myself repeatedly wishing that I had simply been born a girl. What surprised me most was that the thought felt strangely familiar, as if it had always been somewhere in the back of my mind.
I started researching gender dysphoria to better understand what I was experiencing. I still don’t fully understand everything about gender identity, but I know a few things about myself.
If there were a button that could instantly make me biologically female, with everyone remembering me that way and no social consequences, I would press it immediately without hesitation.
More recently I’ve realized something else. Even if I imagine a world where women had the same career expectations, the same responsibilities, and all the same hardships, I would still want that. When I imagine my body gradually becoming female, the emotions I feel are comfort and peace with slight excitement nonetheless.
At the same time, I’m constantly questioning myself.
I keep wondering:
What if this is just stress from medical school?
What if I’m only overwhelmed by growing up and facing adult responsibilities?
What if I simply hate the male role in my culture?
What if I’m overthinking something that most people never think about?
What if my mind is creating an explanation because I’m anxious about my future?
Those thoughts make me doubt myself almost every day.
Looking back, I can also remember some things that seem relevant, although I don’t know whether they actually mean anything. People generally described me as calm and gentle, I often preferred spending time with girls, and many of the few friendships I remember from childhood were with girls rather than boys.
Another thing that stands out is that during the years I struggled with pornography, I consistently imagined myself in the female role rather than the male one. I don’t know whether that’s meaningful or not, but it felt consistent enough to mention.
One thing I’m still trying to understand is this: when people refer to me as a man, something feels deeply wrong or misclassified. On the other hand, when I privately think of myself as a woman—or even if someone jokingly refers to me that way—I feel an unexpected sense of relief and calm. It’s difficult to explain, but it feels less like excitement and more like something settling into place.
Despite all of this, transitioning feels almost impossible. Financially it would be extremely difficult, and socially I don’t think my family or community would understand or even take me seriously.
I’m really hoping for is to hear from people who questioned themselves for a long time. Did any of what I’ve described resonate with your own experience? Were there parts that stood out to you as particularly consistent—or inconsistent—with gender dysphoria?
Thank you for reading.