r/nanayconfessions

Am I the asshole for being annoyed that my in-laws already expect my baby’s things to be handed down to my SIL’s baby?

My baby is 5 months old, and my SIL is about to give birth anytime soon.

Lately, I’ve been getting increasingly annoyed because my husband’s family especially the grandmother keeps making comments whenever we buy something new for our baby. They’ll always say things like, “Ingatan niyo ‘yan ha, ipapamana pa sa pinsan niya,” referring to my SIL’s baby.

It’s happening with everything our baby’s high chair, bathtub, crib, and other baby stuff.
Like… hello? My baby is only FIVE MONTHS OLD. 😭 These things are meant to be used for years. Of course I’m going to let my baby get as much use out of them as possible before even thinking about handing them down.

What makes it more annoying is that my SIL sometimes makes comments like, “Mukhang maliit na mga gamit ng anak mo, bigay mo na lang sa baby ko.” 😭

I know technically these are just baby things, and maybe I’m making a bigger deal out of it than I should. But I saved up for all of these. I specifically chose and bought things that I knew my baby could use for several years because I wanted to get our money’s worth out of them.

It just bothers me that there’s already this expectation that once my baby outgrows something, it automatically belongs to my SIL’s baby. No one even asks whether I want to keep it, reuse it, sell it, or give it away. It’s just assumed that we’ll hand everything down.
And honestly, I don’t mind giving away things that we genuinely no longer need. I’m not against hand-me-downs at all. What annoys me is the entitlement and the constant expectation that our baby’s things are basically being reserved for their baby too.
Am I being unreasonable for finding this annoying? 😭

reddit.com
u/lflgr — 1 day ago

TW: 6 weeks pregnant and thinking of terminating

Hi,

Unang una sa lahat pasensya na po. I am not sure if tama ba tung ginagawa ko. I am 6 weeks pregnant and also 6 months postpartum via CS i had complications and sobrang traumatic ng experience ko. I had CHF and pre eclampsia and now Pregnant na ako 😭 Hindi ako nagcontraceptives, naging firm ako sa partner ko na ayaw ko na magcontraceptives dahil sobrang train wreck ng hormones ko based sa experience ko nung naka depo ako. I tried to ask my OB bago ako iCS kung pwede niya na ako iligate, Unfortunately hindi siya pumayag and after nung traumatic experience during childbirth/postpartum, nakiusap ako sa partner ko na baka maiconsider niya mag pavasectomy. Ayaw din niya, Condom? Ayaw din. Nag pull out and calendar kami, and failed. Now, I have this ideation na iterminate itong pregnancy na ito lalo na hindi biro pinagdaanan ko, Kinausap ko yung partner ko and hindi siya pumayag, mukhang nagalit pa sa gusto kong mangyari 😭 Sobrang natatakot ako, Maliliit pa mga baby ko isang 3y/o at 6 months old. Paano kung hindi kayanin ng katawan ko ulit? Sobrang helpless ko, parang death sentence ko na itong pagbubuntis ko kung sakaling itutuloy ko.

reddit.com
u/artsylemonade_ — 1 day ago

Csection scar

Hello cs moms. 3 weeks pp here and i just wanna ask kung normal ba na ganto pa rin itsura ng scar ko? Mostly kasi ng nakikita ko here is bikini cut, yung sakin ay vertical.

u/bella2ciao — 1 day ago

Mommies help with BIRTH CERT

Just gave birth 3 days ago. My partner is not here. Nasa ibang bansa. We are not married. Dito sa hospital, hindi nila nilagay yong name ng father at surname sa birth certificate kasi wala daw partner ko.

Ngayon hindi pa siya posted kasi ayoko ng ganun. Anong options ko para malagay nila sa birth certificate name ng father? At magamit ng baby ko surname niya?

reddit.com
u/Actual_Stable3168 — 1 day ago

Postpartum Hives

Is it just me, or is anyone else dealing with this right now? I've been breaking out in hives out of nowhere. I plan to get allergy tested again, though nothing showed up when I got tested 7–8 years ago. Nakakainis, kasi walang clear external trigger, sobrang random.

Ang hirap pero nakaka fulfilling maging nanay

(Sigh) FTM. eto nagtatype kasi tulog na LO ko, maglalaba pa pagkatapos kumain, tutupi ng damit at makakaligo na din. Mahirap pero di ka naman pwde sumuko. May responsibilidad kana eh.

Pagod lang siguro, may paulit2 na routine, kakapagod magpatulog at nakaka drain kasi EBF pa.

Husband is an OFW, kami lang ng ate ko magkasama sa bahay and very thankful kasi andito ate ko di ko alam kung nasa tamang pag iisip ba ako kung ako lang mag isa.

Gusto kong mag unwind, mag dayoff ung tipong dayoff na 24 hrs pero syempre hindi pwde kasi paano na si baby ko na super cute, saka nalang siguro. Dadating din tayo diyan.

Kung umabot ka sa pagbabasa neto, salamat.
Salamat sa oras mo. Ingat ka palagi, bawal magkasakit.

AT SA LAHAT NG NANAY, MABUHAY TAYONG LAHAT!!!

reddit.com

Should I let my hubby spend much for branded baby clothes and other expenses.

I am a single mom when we met kaya medyo may alam na ako sa mga gastusin. Now, I am pregy with our baby. Since 1st baby nya and he’s been wanting this for so long, medyo magastos sya sa nesting 🤣 nanghihinayang ako kase may mga alternatives naman.

  1. I have a health card that covers my prenatal and postnatal checkups, but he’s suggesting that I try another OB who handles high-risk pregnancies (e hindi man ngani ako high risk. 🤣) I told him to give my OB a chance kase sya rin yung nag CS sa akin sa 1st kaya alam na nya yung history ko. 45k yung CS package for private room to suite then 65k+ doon sa nakita nyang OB), same hospital.

  2. He wants to buy branded newborn onesies when there are a lot of options sa shopee and other local shops na same quality. Sabi ko mabilis lang kaliitan ni baby sayang naman (pero di pa kami bumibili, checking pa lang sya dahil wala pang gender baby namin). Bawi na lang kapag toddler na.

  3. He wants to buy basinet, crib, changing diaper table etc, pero may nabili akong crib sa ikea before na adjustable yung higaan na pwedeng gamitin from newborn to 4y/o (yung nabababa yung higaan), it was worth the money compared sa mga gusto nyang aabot ng 20k+ yun pa lang.

  4. I told him kapag nanganak ako, ayusin nya yung papers ko so we can apply for guarantee letter for hospitalization sa municipyo. Growing up, merong ganon dito sa Mabalacat, kailangan lang maglaan ng 1 day to complete the papers. Kahit na pa may ipon na kami, sayang yung discount be! Hahaha (at least we can use the other savings for our future business plan) kahit doon man lang makabawi tayo sa mga taxes na binabayaran. Si ate kase noon nakakuha ng 30k nung naCS sya, 10k na lang binayaran sa hospital. Tatay ko rin before nakakuha ng 40k less sa 80k bill nya. Sayang yon! 🤣 naisip ko kapag ayaw nya si ate papaglakarin ko tapos bigay ko sa kanya yung kalahati ng discount na makukuha namin HAHAHA. I’m trying to exhaust all the possible way para bumaba yung bill kahit 45k lang rin sya. I also contacted my HMO provider and they said they will cover 15k.

  5. I have SSS Mat Ben for 110k na papasok sa payroll ko this January, hindi ko pa sinasabi sa kanya kase he wants to cover everything. Sabi nya kaya naman nya lahat ng gastos even naka maternity leave ako. Sasabihin ko ba kung magkano buo when he only knows e 70k lang madalas ang sa SSS? Somehow nagpipigil akong magsabi ng lahat ng mga to as I want him to find out kung paano ba yung responsibilities ng pagiging daddy at ayokong maging complaisant sya. My plan for the 110k is backup sa kasong kailangan naming ifile doon sa taong ayaw umalis sa bahay na kinuha namin sa pag-ibig or pang start ng business. Hindi ko naman sya ipagdadamot sa kanya, parang ayoko lang muna sabihin lahat (yung ex ko kase masyadong naging kampante nung nalaman nyang parang kaya lahat icover ng hmo at benefits ko yung sa 1st ko at wala na syang effort etc.)

Gusto ko lang sana makatulong makasave pero ayokong masanay sya na I’m initiating sa lahat at makampante sya na “kaya naman nya yon gawan ng paraan).

reddit.com
u/Entire-Spinach-9360 — 1 day ago

at nag umpisa na nga — in laws prob

i have nothing against my in laws, in fact, sobrang grateful ako sakanila kasi sobrang maalaga sila saakin even before i was pregnant and until now. pero tama nga talaga yung karamihan na meron at merong magiging problem when you’re living with your in laws.

they don’t directly communicate saakin yung mga “ayaw” nilang gawin for my baby, e.g 1. ayaw nila paliguan. grabe, 2 weeks di naligo yung anak ko. tinakas lang namin ng asawa ko, and nung nalaman nila, nagalit. 2. since tuloy tuloy yung ulan, wala si mr. sun for almost 3 weeks and kanina lang pinaaraw ko si baby kasi may sinag ng araw. like what they briefed me sa nicu when i was at the hospital (take note, andun din MIL ko nung sinabi to) sabi sa’kin ni dra & sa nicu na hubaran si baby, diaper lang daw ang suot and ipaaraw for 30 mins. 15 mins each side. ngayon, nagagalit daw sila sa husband ko na “pabaya” raw kami sa apo nila.

eh kung tutuusin, mas maalaga pa ako sa anak ko kesa sakanila kasi every time na kinukuha nila si baby to sleep in their room, andun yung 3 dogs nila. walang air purifier, nagv-vacuum lang sila madalas, oo. pero still, may mga nakukuha akong hair ng dogs sa damit and face ni baby. ilang beses na.

since cs ako, ang reason nila is hahayaan lang daw muna akong mag recover kaya ayaw nila ako ma-overwork. pero yung decision namin ni husband na ayaw sana naming ma-expose si baby sa pets, hindi marespeto. we even gave our 2 cats temporarily sa mga kapatid ko para di ma-expose baby namin sa mga buhok tapos ganon lang din pala kahahantungan hahaha.

parang wala akong karapatan mag decide for my child. and parang wala ako karapatang magreklamo kasi simula’t sapul sila naman lahat nagbabayad. nakakainis lang kasi napaka-selective nila sa sinasabi nilang, “sa doctor tayo makinig” kasi kung ako na gumagawa ng mga sinasabi ng doctor, hindi na nila sinusunod

reddit.com
u/ainttorii — 1 day ago

diaper rash

first time mom here. di na nagwwork yung mga diaper cream kay baby. 10 months na si baby. gamit ko is mustela vitamin barrier cream at nung maubos, yung unilab zinc oxide naman. kaso walang nagwwork talaga. kumalat lang lalo. naging rough yung private part ni baby at mapula. nag start yung rashes nya nung nag switch kami sa eq dry, now huggies na. medyo may improvements naman kaso itchy pa din si baby. dry yung some parts pero yung singit ni baby is nagmmoist. di rin kami makalabas para sana makapagpa check up. ilang weeks na maulan. need help po😭 ano pong magandang gamitin?

edit: thank you po sa mga nag respond. nag stop po muna ako sa mga cream at pag suot nya ng diaper. magpapa consult na din online once na set up na lahat.

reddit.com

Age to start table foods

Hi mommies! What age nyo inistart iintroduce yung babies nyo sa table foods? Like kung ano ang ulam nyo, yun din kanila? Also, how did you transition your babies to eat the same food as yours?

Thank you!

reddit.com
u/__MsChanandlerBong — 1 day ago

SSS mat ben

Hi! First time mom/preggy here. Nung nalaman kong buntis ako, nag-hulog ako kagaad ng contri ko for the qualifying period ng due date ko. Which is Oct first week. Buong 6 months lang yung bayad, buong qualifying period. The month before that, hindi nakapag hulog since unemployed ako. So balak o lang talaga is makuha yung 70k na mat ben since naka max din hulog ko, which is 3k.

Ngayon, since Oct first week nga ang due date ko. And given my situation, may gestational hypertension ako, in-ask ko OB ko if pwede akong i-sched na lang for CS, like 37-38 weeks, around 2nd to 3rd week ng Sept yun and it’s not my due date. Now ang question ko, how much ang makukuha ko if ganun nga ang nangyare at hindi ako manganganak ng Oct? Maleless ba yung 70k?

reddit.com

Towel for toddlers

Hi mommies! Saan kayo bumibili towel for your toddlers? Medyo late ko na narealize na I've been using the towels from St. Patrick simula newborn gang nag 3 na siya HAHAHA sorry na! Hindi kasi nangingilaw, makapal, and absorbent talaga siya.

Meron ba kayong suggestion, di naman need branded na branded. Yung mga plain lang sana kasi naalibadbaran ako ngayon sa mga may print 🥲

reddit.com

Kelan ang perfect time to ask for an epidural during delivery?

Hi mommies! FTM here currently 35wks, ask ko lang kasi Im opting for the epidural sa delivery ni baby. During labor, when ba sya nire-request? Like, may specific ba na cm to ask na magpaepidural na?

Ask ko na lang din if ang dinala nyo bang damit ni baby sa hospital is baru-baruan or okay lang na onesies? May nabasa ksi ako na baruan dw since dahil sa pusod ni baby pero may ibang moms na onesies naman dw dinala nla for convenience. Im confused if ano ba tlaga ddalhin ko since nakabili na ako ng onesies.

When it comes to finding a pedia for baby ba when naman magstart? Dapat ba nagka-appointment na kami sa magiging pedia ni baby before delivery?

Also, bukod ba sa hospital fees during delivery may mga addtl pa bang bnabayaran?

Thank you so much po

reddit.com
u/Mean-Victory9450 — 2 days ago

Cotton pads for baby’s bum cleaning.

Hi mommies. May gumagamit ba dito ng cotton pads, yung usually ginagamit as make-up remover, for cleaning baby’s bum pag nag poop instead of cotton balls? Pwede ba yun sila gamitin sa bum ni baby? Planning to switch kasi dun dahil naliliitan ako sa cotton balls, mas malaki kasi coverage nitong cotton pads para mas makatipid din.

reddit.com
u/Couch_PotatoSalad — 2 days ago

Baptism

Okay lang ba na December 19 (Saturday) ang date ng binyag ng baby namin? First-time parents kami and we’re planning to have our baby’s baptism on December 19, which falls on a Saturday. Since December na rin siya, iniisip ko kung okay ba yung date or baka marami nang may Christmas parties, Simbang Gabi preparations, or busy na yung mga relatives and godparents. For those who had their baby’s baptism around this time, okay naman ba ang Saturday before Christmas, or would it be better to choose an earlier date in December?

reddit.com
u/Mountain_Sign_1022 — 1 day ago

I'm really over this monsoon

Almost 3 weeks of non-stop rain. Kumusta kayo mga nanays?

Yung mga junakis ko inip na inip na sa loob ng bahay. Maski ako nababaliw na.

Yung mga labada tambak na. Yung mga bagong laba amoy kulob. 😭😭😭

reddit.com
u/Tricky_Cat_6523 — 2 days ago

Potty Training

My son will be turning 2yrs old next month. Kaka-start lang namen ng potty training, we are on our 3rd day na. He showed sign of readiness na din kaya nag-start na kame.

1st day- successful.
He was able to do #1 and #2 in the toilet

2nd day- meh.
Feeling ko namimiss ko yung cues nya. pag inuupo ko sya sa toilet hindi sya nag-pee pero mamaya maya lang iihi sya sa floor.

pero good thing is, sinasabe nya saken pag nag-pee sya tapos ituturo pa nya saken where.

3rd day-same as 2nd day.

Hindi ko sya fino-force pag ayaw na nya sa toilet. I try to bring him sa toilet pagkagising sa umaga, after eating saka pag alam kong madame syang liquid na nainom after 20-30mins dalhin ko na sya sa toilet.

wala din syang diapers sa day time. only at night and nap times. pero dumating na today yung order kong waterproof sheet so I would like to try tonight na wala na ding diaper sa gabe.

Pero ewan ko, am I doing this wrong ba? para feeling ko namimissed ko mga cues nya 🥹

reddit.com

Gusto ko na maging single mom 😭

Guys siguro babash niyo ko by saying this pero gusto ko na talaga maging single mom 😭 Naiinis na ko sa partner ko ☹️ mas malaki ako kumita sknya sabi ko magresign na sya ayaw pumayag kasi baka matanda na daw sya which is 29 lang naman sya and di madiskarte or umisip ng paraan para mag upgrade pero stable naman yung job nya kaso kulang ng kulang if sya lang mag wowork baka gatas lang ni baby as a MWE. Pinayagan sya ng company nya mag leave ng 3 mos ksama ko sya mag alaga pero lahat ng ayaw ko gngwa nya kinikiss nya anak namin, di nagigising pag umiiyak si baby pag gabi tulog ng tulog kahit umaga sabi ko bawal ako magpuyat kasi may post eclampsia ako and di sya maselan napaka unhygienic nya like ambaho ng hininga nya tapos hikab pa sya ng hikab pag hawak nya si baby. Gusto kong umuwi na sya saknila, ngayon ko lang nakita yung ganitong side nya after 11 yrs of us trying to have a baby. Ngayon gusto ko si LO all by myself.

PS: Licensed professional me and wfh work ko so i think kaya ko naman all by myself si baby. Ang problema ko lang is paano ko sya hihiwalayan, alam ko mahal nya anak namin and hiniling namin sya but pag pinag sasabihan ko sya sumasama loob nya tnry ko na yun and di nya binabago yung ways nya. Mali ako kasi sa 11 yrs dko nakita na hindi ganitong tatay yung gusto ko sa anak ko kasi pag laki pa ni baby baka mas madami pa kami lalo na di pag agreehan. Ngayon palang gusto ko ng tapusin yung relasyon namin ☹️ Di pa naman po kami kasal. Ayaw nya ko pakasalan before kasi baka di daw kami mag kaanak and alam nya na mahilig ako sa bata.

reddit.com
u/ExpectingCPA — 3 days ago

Parang ayaw ko na ikasal.

Hello guys. Share this. My partner ako and niyaya niya ako ng kasal. Actually 15 yrs na kami together. But recently he confessed of a cheating issue like 10 yrs ago pa before ako mabuntis.

Ngayon nagkaka doubt na ako. Pinang huhugutan ko yun na parang ayaw ko na ikasal pa. Pwede niya gawin yun kahit may kids kami. Ramdam ko all the efforts pero para saan pa yun kung ginawa niya yun while kami pa. So hindi niya talaga ako totally minahal.

Reason niya bata pa siya noon at yung mga decision making is pa bigla bigla. Pero sakin hindi na masakit ngayon na parang bago lang nangyari.

reddit.com
u/Specific-Piglet-4090 — 2 days ago