I’m so desperate for relief that I’ve lost myself and I’m becoming a different person
I only found out about RCPD recently after my dad listened to a podcast. He said it sounded like me and asked if I burp. Once he explained it, everything clicked. I was horrified when I realized people could probably hear the noises my throat had been making all along.
I’ve had chronic pain since I was 10, which became unmanageable in my mid-teens. I had to quit everything, including dropping out of high school. My parents have taken me abroad for treatment, but every doctor has ignored my inability to burp and extreme bloating.
I’m so desperate, embarrassed, and ashamed. I look 7–8 months pregnant most of the time. Every time I eat or drink, pressure builds in my chest, followed by loud throat growling that can be heard across the room. I’m a croaking teenage girl who looks heavily pregnant.
I also have a condition that causes dangerously low blood pressure when I’m upright, so I need 5 teaspoons of salt and 4L of water every day. Both make the bloating much worse, but without them I’m at high risk of near-fainting or fainting.
Right now, I’m nearly 24 hours without food because I can’t deal with RCPD anymore.
I’m begging to go to the Bastian Voice Institute because if I stay in my country, I could wait months or years for the Botox procedure. My dad wants to wait for an official diagnosis and treatment here, even though every doctor has brushed us off. I understand where he’s coming from, but I’m so desperate that I blew up at him. I’ve been yelling and disrespectful to my parents, and that’s not who I am. I feel like I’ve completely lost myself.
If anyone can relate, offer support, has words of wisdom, or can offer advice. It would be much appreciated. Thank you.