r/rsforgays

There was a straight friend of mine who also has a girlfriend. Last year, I started having feelings for him and I ruined the friendship (it’s a long story). He eventually realized that I am gay, but we still talk and are still friends.
We discuss many things with each other, and he really wants me as his business partner. However, every time we talk, he tells me not to get into a relationship. He says it is not the right time and that I should only think about it after I turn 40 (I am 23 now). We argue about love all the time, and he claims he is saying all of this based on his own experiences with love. I just don't understand what his true thoughts are?

The physician is openly gay, politically moderate, and private about politics. He is well respected locally, coaches youth sports, and volunteers with people struggling with drug addiction. He presents as traditionally masculine but might be seen as the more submissive partner. Their sex life is 7/10.

The woman is an OF model whose OF or social media accounts not known locally. However, both are growing. She is publicly far-left, posts heavily about social justice and Trump, has purple/blue hair and facial piercings, and is a single mother of a teenager. Their sex life is 9/10.

The man is a closeted bisexual in his 50s with high-school-aged children and a stable, well-paying job. He is weighing both relationships and fears community backlash, especially toward his children.

Sometimes when I'm hitting the bar or clubs I can strike out in a night, basically only getting rejections or approached by people I'm less than excited about. I actually think I'm a decent looking guy and this is probably typical for most people. But sometimes it makes me fucking crash out. I imagine the conventionally attractive twink or blond jock who can reach out and procure whoever he likes like adam picking fruit off a vine. The gay world must appear so friendly, so intoxicating, to this person. But does this person actually exist or is it just a fantasy?

My hunch is that gay chad is real, but the affect of starvation/desperation/insecurity the image creates is a product of gay dating and hookup apps. The swipe, the grid, and the map create an impression of frictionless consumption. So when in real life you're consumption is interrupted by the realities of desire and attraction, it can make you feel really deficient, either socially, like you're missing some quality everyone else has, or like a junkie unable to get their fix. Alternatively, it's been like this since Wilde and I'm massively overintellectualizing it. Alternatively, this is just a me thing. Thoughts?

I am sexually aroused by own XY (not 🚂) male body. When I see myself in the mirror and my abs I get bricked up. I have to jerk off after going to the gym and getting a good pump because I am aroused by my male body. Being shirtless outside feels like voyeurism

My sexuality has become a simplifying framework imposed onto existence. Instead of confronting your average Joe in his full ambiguity and mysteriousness, I instinctively collapse him into erotic possibility. I cannot stop thinking of me and him at the altar exchanging vows before having sweaty hairy brutal sex.

Desire has morphed into a coping mechanism to vaguely guide me through the cosmic dance of existential uncertainty.

Also unrelated, coke zero is better than diet coke.