r/sgdatingscene

I(m23) saw this girl(f22) at an event about six months ago and was just kinda an eye candy for me. Didn’t even talk to her. Randomly came across her acc on suggested following with one mutual and i was like, why not? So i req her acc and she accepted it and followed me back. Then essentially nothing happened for the next six months until she started liking my stories consistently. All i would do is js like her stories back. The thing is, this girl is way out of my league. Do i even try to talk to her and if so how. Sorry if this is stupid but I’ve been out of the game for quite some time now so I don’t really know what to do. Haven’t been in such a situation since sec sch.

For me, so far:

• Milo 3-in-1 packet milo van
• Pokémon-themed donut 🍩
• Spy X Family stickers
• Pokemon mug from Japan
• Pikachu plush taiwan exclusive

throwaway acc bc if anybody ik sees this im finished and im changing some details js incase

so ive known and started talking to this person for almost two months now and we have some good conversations and hung out a few times but i still cannot tell whether she fw me (well or is chill with me)

before i go further i js want to put it out there that im not interested in her, or at least i think so and hope so because if i am that's another issue idw to get my hands stuck in, im only asking it here bc i js need more opinions

the thing is shes always bouncing between being extremely dry and being extremely involved. there are times where she'd reply to my msg and when j reply, we'd have a long convo that lasts for hours. but then sometimes if i reply literally the same minute then shes gone for hours (she also randomly disappears during our long convos but i cant say much bc 5h of texting not bad already)

sometimes shed have a lot of things to say and the convo flows, sometimes she just says "ohh" or sends some emoji and then go off. there are times where she on her own accord (i never messaged anything before shed text) about what shes doing or what she got, then that same day she'll suddenly mia out of nowhere

there are times where i ask how her her stuff went and without me prompting shed just say how bad it went and sometimes shed even start ranting about it even without me asking. yst i said i hoped she had fun going out w friends and she just said "thanks", then at 1am when i was sleeping randomly texts me to abt smth in her friend's team

then once when i asked if we could go out tgt soon then the convo changed to smth else, she sudd ask if i was free on wed bc that's when shes usually free, and this was when the convo changed to smth else btw

atp idk sia, so does she fw me or no. because sometimes she js tells me stuff abt her day but then other days she texts like she can't be bothered. ive asked if she liked talking to me and she said she did but she js replies slow and i also once asked if she actually wanted to talk to me or not and she said "iw" but idk if thats js bc i put her on the spot and she js needed smth to reply with

if shes always dry then fair enough thats normal, but the way she interacts flactuates sm sia, its like shes cool with me but then straight away it feels like she isnt and im actlly damn lost bc i cant tell if she likes my presence or im js bothering her bc im getting sm mixed signals

im so shit with social cues so anyone whos an expert please help me with this one

I (33F) matched with a 36M on Hinge in July, but he didn’t reply until I messaged him again in late August, at which point he immediately asked if we could move the conversation to Telegram. He is a high achiever who works as a director at a tech MNC, runs his own PE business, and has his own apartment (which somehow makes me feel small). The first few days of texting were pretty normal, but after I had a health scare and wanted to pause the conversation, he came to accompany me to the specialist, which was also the first time we met. I guess there was a strong chemistry at first sight, as we started holding hands, hugging, and kissing.

Over the past month, it has felt really intense, as he kept telling me that he loves me and misses me a lot. However, his actions have not reflected his words. His replies are sporadic, and I always have to initiate conversation, although I do receive his replies and telebubbles every day. It is really difficult to ask him out after work, as he either has to work overtime or work out until late, works on his business on Saturdays, and goes missing on Sundays. There have been times when it sounded like our meeting was confirmed, but either he did not confirm and I got bailed out, or he was very late. He has been telling me that work has been very bad for him and that he is overloaded and tired. He did try to let me know the seriousness of his situation by sharing disappearing photos of the deck he was reviewing or the Teams meeting he was in. But, he’s just not meeting my emotional needs.

I have borderline personality traits (I use the term "traits" instead of "disorder" because I am not officially diagnosed), so it is really tough on my mental health. I am swinging between idealisation and devaluation, pushing him away and pulling him back. He acknowledged to me that I did a lot, but he does not know how to accept me into his life, so he becomes cold. He told me that he appreciates me and that I am his. He always thinks about me and my happiness.

It is so difficult right now; I do not know if I should continue staying or let go. He told me we will meet on Sunday, but I have lost my trust in him. I am going to meet my therapist tomorrow to work on this, but what should I do?

I’m mid 30s F and completely new to dating apps *first time. In just under 2 mths, I’ve been on 34 actual dates, with another 12 scheduled later this mth, and now I’m starting to feel overwhelmed and exhausted.

Before this, I hadn’t dated anyone in 12 yrs. I was only ever with one man; my late hub. I’ve been single for more than 3 yrs and hadn’t been intimate with anyone for over 6 yrs. (Yeap sexless marriage)

Out of the 34 men I have met, I slept with 2. And if I am honest.... I loved it. I am so glad I did it! I didnt regret it bcuz I felt like a queen. The chemistry, attention and adrenaline made me feel alive again! But it also awakens smth else in me.

All the dates themselves have actually been lovely. And i hope they do the same to all the women they meet out there as well. Most of the men hv been generous, kind and respectful. I enjoy meeting them, hearing about their lives, and yes, it feels amazing to feel wanted and having similar interests.

But here’s my prob. Once I sense that someone wants something more serious from me, I subsconciously tend to pull back. As soon as i get hints of commitment, family, or building smth deeper- it still scares me.

My closest friends are now telling me to slow down because this is so unlike me (they knew how mucb dutiful, traditional and loyal wife i used to be), and they’re worried I’m enjoying the physical side more than actually connecting emotionally. Now my colleagues and friends are starting to regret encouraging me to go on dates.

I do believe I could love someone again if I met the right person. I just don’t know whether I’m genuinely ready or simply enjoying this newfound freedom a little too much.

So… 34 dates in 2 mths. Is this a normal exploration phase or a sign I should take a break? Oh god, bless my soul.

32M, status: soon to be divorced (final judgment in one month, can’t wait for this nightmare to be over).

we called for a divorce 3 years ago and one of the reason she cited was that i wasn’t ambitious. i think i’m dedicated to my job, finding out how i can learn new things and taking up courses. can anyone please share what does being ambitious mean?

1. earning more = ambitious?
2. someone is chasing their dream but is earning less than a fresh graduate = ambitious?
3. working long hours = ambitious?
4. having multiple sources of income = ambitious?

it could be her excuse but i also do see this popping out on dating profiles. it’s now become a trigger word for me hahaha. i’m so curious, appreciate your sharing! 🙆‍♂️

backstory: called for divorced 3 years ago because my spouse felt that she deserved more when i already gave her a house while i was schooling and she was working. she felt i was not ambitious enough because i was earning peanuts despite searching for new opportunities, with over 100 applications. then all her woke single friends would enable her, watching “change days” (not the crux of it, but damn i hated the show) and decided that i was not enough. don’t get me wrong, i believe i can be better to improve. BUT she said and did all this and cheated 🤷‍♂️ story is longer but i’ll just leave it here.

New activities for this weekend! If you found this useful, can give an upvote ⬆️
Also feel free to comment more activities to the list!

Toei Animation Store Opening (Free)
Jewel Changi Airport, #04-235

The Invisible City Quest Mobile Game from LTA/GovTech (Free)
Multiple locations across Singapore

Atomic Daydream (Free)
heartware store & gallery

Open House 2026: Through the Frame (Free)
STPI, 41 Robertson Quay

Joo Chiat Street Social (Free)
Joo Chiat Road, between Dunman Road and East Coast Road

Indie Bookshop Day (Free)
Various bookstores across Singapore

INNERDRIVE®: THE PERFORMANCE CIRCUIT (Free)
Plaza Singapura, Outdoor Plaza

Retro Kulture Sunday at Kapo Factory (Free)
Kapo Factory, 80 Playfair Road

LEGO F1 Experience The Thrill (Free)
Suntec City Atrium, Tower 3 & 4

Japanese Film Festival 2026: The SJ60 Edition $16
Shaw Lido, Filmhouse & Oldham Theatre

Source: TODAYDOWHAT_BOT on Tele for more activities/food

Right now dating online feels dull. Now we are too connected through online media where we are able to look at attractive looking people effortlessly be it tiktok, ig or anywhere. Where it sets the unrealistic standard of guys wanting the queen and girls wanting their oppa, even if they look v meh, they dont even bother learning about you nor your personality. I dont think im a very attractive looking person but it just feels sad. Especially looking all those profiles with one word answer and one worded replies, this is boring and exhausting.

Recently met a guy in Ometv and we clicked . Talked a lot and felt the vibe but my wifi got disconnected in between . Should I contact him or find him cause we got to know that we have some common friends ?I liked talking to him ..is it weird ?