u/AddressSlight3896

You knwo what ive realised, i can get over things, get out of the most terribke phases, climb out of depressive episodes that last months, stay clean, let nobody knwo whats going on, still put on a high performance front, but i can NEVER, and i mean NEVER, escape the fact that this is what i find comfort in. I love being miserable because thats what makes me feel like me. I find so much comfort and rejoicing in being absolutely miserable.

Im so done with just being a fing loser im so tired i just need someoen to tell me how to not be a loser hwo yo get my life on track how to live to its fullest. I dont knwo if its my fed uo life and circumstances or if its me. This is like my fifth existential crisis post today

Okay so since april i have been obsessed with a jahil gadha but in august i just realised i need to stop ruining my life by being so obsessed with someone who barely knows me. So i got over the incapacitating fixation i had on him and i dont follow him on ig either now. But jab bhi kahi se wo nazar ajaye ya kuvh like it still does smyh to me. Like were not in yhe same shcool but if i see him on social media it just does smth. Like idk if its actually anger or im just trying to tell myself its anger. But how can it br when he never did anything to me because we litr NEVER EVEN TALKED. I cant tell myself i still like him because it was just the most terrible time of my life. So now i just feel riled up to br better. Just to be the best version of myself so that i never feel like i need his appreciation or approval or attention or whatever it is i want from him. Im just the most undisciplined person rver i can never stick to anything. So i want to be better. I want to stop feeling like i want him or that i like him because h literally doesnt know me like maybe i was a ranodm girl he followed.everyone ive talked to about this has told me that im out of his league but that just makes me even sadder bec even still he coudknt like me. I knwo im just rambling and sayifn total bakwas but i just feel so frekaing sad. Is this what it means to like someone. Why isnt it goign away even after so long. I cant like him i cant i literally cant. I need all thsi to go away. I need to make myself a better person i need to be satisfied with myself. Please help me

if you wnat to move out of an abusive household with your siblings and a parent, what are teh steps you need to follow. like u need to find an apartment and stuff ut what else liek hwo do u exactly follow thsi through?

im so fkcing scared its literally eating me alive. ive just been passing unbearable time because i just want tuesday to come and i want this shit to be ovr with. i no longer want to be consumed by this fear. ive always been a good student but my exams went shit terrible and seeing alevel students get results that were way below their expctations, im just too goddamn scared now. what if im expecting as like them and will ed up with cs. i cant even imagine that im so scared. i cant get bad grades bec for me my entire worth is dependant on them. all i can say is that im so so scared. im praying constatnly and even fasting for my good result but im just so scared. please pray for me. i cant do this anymore this fear is paralysing me. please ya Allah save me.

yeh kon log hote hain jo dinon tak reply nahi karte private mein but theyre actually active evrywhere else. like its kind of disrespectful ke you dont think someone is imp enough to reply to.

having the worst hyperventilating-breakdown ever bec i have so much fucking work to do and my grp memebrs are litr not rpelying and i cant move forwrad with my work without discussing and getting their approval. I AM LITR LOOSING MY FCKING SHIT RIGHT NOW SOMEONE HELP ME WHY CANT THEY JUST RPELY

guys....the time has arrived.....that ive been wiating for since 4 months. i finally got the ick from him like THANK GOD. and ive realised that hes not even good looking as i made him out to be like idk hwy i glorified him so much in my head. oh my god i feel like war is over literally my goodness i cant even explain how glad i feel.

im so full of rage rn. everything in life is just so unfair. no matter how many opportunities i apply for or events i can never get in even tho its not based on merit or anything. the management just chooses their friends over other applicants and taht way some people get to be a part of every event while others dont get to be in any. i just feel so sad and mad at the way of things. i just wnated to experience being in teh managment for a school event but obv nothing in my life ever works out so that cant happen either. i dont know why i have no accoplishemnt in life whatsoever and no matte rhwo. much i try it doenst work out. i feel liek evrything is so utterly pointless. i just want to vanish into thin air. i hate this i hate my life i hate evryone i hate myself

feeling pretty disillusioned rn not in a sad way but just like a: ok wow. so a totally random guy that just started following one of my friends liked her story but this man that i have litr been obsessed with for the past 4 months cannot muster up the courage to like my story, of anything like my cat let alone my face. so yea, if he wanted to he would and he doesnt like me no matter how delusional i try to be. if love cannot be reciprocated why does it have to exist. i wish i could just stop liking him. i ahte him so much

its so funny how ive just gotten so used to my dad doing shitty stuff that it doesnt even faze me anymore. like just now he was being so ill mannered and throwing things around when he couldve just normally picked them up and placed them to the side. but like im not even scared or anxious that hes in a bad mood bec bro what else does he even do. like this is all that there is to him. just a miserable little fuck. i hope you rot in hell until eternity.

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1iCiu-mqLPUTaQeuob7uem-BgPD1yicLC?usp=sharing

(download the file and then open it)

pls pray for my result guys 🙏🏻

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Just had a humiliating experience i mean its not that bad and rn im just exaggerating bec it JUST happened so maybe if i write abt it ill feel better. So i had an interview for this media thing i applied to and i thought it was super chill and theyd just ask me why im interested in it. I ahvent done anytbijf like this before but i like taking pictures so i was rlly excited and looking forward to it. But then the interviewer started asking me bamboozling befuddling questions about cakera settings and i was just shocked honestlty. Because this is for a school event and i rlly didnt thinm theyd expect me to be some professional photographer. So i lowk just had to laugh and say im sorry i dont know about this and apologise for wastinf her time. She was chill abt it but i sitll feel embarrassed and dumb like ifk how to shake this feeling pff even tho i knwo its not that deep and at the end of the day no one rlly cares. Was already have a bad stressful day and this just made me want to combust.

when he posts another story looking absolutely goddamn fine even tho his face isnt even in it so i lowk just combust after seeing it. like wdym you look THAT good and youre also talented asf. i wish i could like his story but i dont want to seem like a creep bec i alr liked the last story he posted. I JUST WISH HED WAKE UP ONE DAY AND SEE HOW MUCH I LOVE HIM

guys im not even kidding hes so fucking beautiful. like HOW. hwo does he look so so s gorgeous as a man. like hes so pretty and beautiful and make me feel so warm isnide and whenever i see him i just explode into the widdest smile ever he makes my entire body feel like its smiling. hes just so amazing and talented and wholesome and nice and pretty and cute and lovely. im in love with him.

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Guys i liked a story he posted of some song. Im so scared is he going to send the police to my house now. Do you think if he likes me too hell also like my story or am i cooking up delusions again.

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guys i cant believe school ended and i cant believe ill never sit in the same class as my friends and laugh at stupid things while not doing our work. i cant believe i have to grow up now.