u/Brad_Brace

Sam said f-word. They bleep it but you can tell. I can no longer support dropout by using leaked usernames and passwords. It is with a sad heart.

So it's no secret I hate my girlfriend's 6 year old niece. I've posted about it before. Like a lot. Some people have accused me of posting too much about it.

But for some quick background to catch you all up. When my girlfriend's sister was pregnant (and boy was she big!) I was told I could put my ear to her belly, so I did. Well, that little unborn bitch kicked me! She literally kicked me on the face! And everybody made a joke out of it! I was told some gaslighting bullshit like “babies kick when they're in the belly!”, and “it's literally impossible for a fetus to kick you hard!”. It's not about how hard it kicked me, it's about the disrespect. From that moment on I hated that narcissist fetus and I knew all the adults would end up enabling her.

I was right. When the girl was born she was morbidly obese, which was to be expected from her entitlement. And she tore my girlfriend's sister from pussy to asshole, that's how big she was. Like, it's all a single gash now. My sister-in-law's husband was devastated because his wife refused to get herself stitched up, saying it was something her precious little princess did.

It's been six years of everybody enabling and spoiling the brat. Everything has to be the way she likes it. If there's a family reunion or party, we have to listen to the music she wants. And it's not even good music, it's usually Ms. Rachel songs backwards. And the TV always has to be tuned to what she wants to see, usually that show with the weird puppets that stare at you silently all the time. And if she doesn't get what she wants she throws tantrums and there go the appliances.

The worst part is that my own daughter was born six months ago, and my girlfriend's niece keeps saying weird things about her, like “the blood of the innocent lubricates the cogs of the ancient machine which breaks the bones and drives the screams of the oppressed soon comes the liberation through the baptism of the accursed blood”. Ugh, I hate that annoying brat so much, she thinks she's better than everybody else because she knows big words!

Well, today she's six years, six months, and six days old, and she began to float surrounded by a red glowing mist in the middle of the living room. And my own six month old baby started laughing and clapping and doing a throaty singing, praising some “stalker in the savannas before creation transfixed and hungry”. So when this was all happening I turned to my girlfriend and said “I told you so!” And she said “shut the fuck up Steve! I told you my niece was the Envoy of the Covetous Stalker from day one! And you're still a bitch for being angry about that kick, she was in utero!”

I feel like I should ask for a paternity test regarding my own daughter, even if my parents say I was literally conceived for the purpose of fathering the Covetous Stalker's Handmaiden. And they also say it's weird that I hated a baby since before she was born.

AITA?

Alright, guys. I need to get this off my chest because I honestly don't know what the fuck to do anymore.

I've been living with my girlfriend for four years. Because of circumstances, we ended up living really close to pretty much her entire family. Her siblings, her nieces and nephews, my witch of a mother-in-law, the whole fucking package.

Not long after we moved here, one of my girlfriend's nieces was born. She was probably the most unpleasant baby I've ever seen. She would only smile at my girlfriend, my mother-in-law and my sister. Whenever she looked at me, she would either cry or make this disgusted face.

That pissed me off because it made me look like I'd done something to her in front of everyone.

Anyway, over the years she eventually became more normal around everyone, including me. But what really got to me was how fucking spoiled everybody made her.

Every family gathering revolved around what this kid wanted. When she was two, the adults had to listen to whatever music she wanted. Whatever she wanted on TV. Everything had to be on at the same time, at full volume. We'd have to leave birthday parties without saying goodbye to anyone because otherwise "she would cry" and she'd throw a massive tantrum.

And unfortunately for me, my girlfriend is her godmother.

For about three and a half years, I basically had to buy this kid candy, toys and take her places on my girlfriend's behalf. And the little brat doesn't even know how to say thank you. She demands things.

If you don't buy her whatever she wants, she throws herself on the floor and has a fucking meltdown. It doesn't matter how much you've already spent on her. If you don't buy her that ONE extra thing she wants at the end, you're getting the tantrum anyway.

I've bought her things before that turned out not to be what she wanted, and she just threw them on the floor.

I swear, I've never had to hold back this much anger toward a fucking child in my life.

And my girlfriend just laughs at it.

Almost everything this kid does makes her laugh. She might tell her off once in a while, but most of the time she seems to love taking her places and buying her shit.

I mentioned a few times, very carefully, that I thought her niece was extremely spoiled and that she shouldn't be encouraging it by giving her whatever she wants as if she were her father.

My girlfriend told me I was exaggerating and that she's "just a baby" and doesn't understand these things.

Well, here's where things get worse.

Today that "baby" is four years old.

And I swear she's still the most spoiled kid I've ever seen.

She talks back to adults, breaks things, still demands that people buy her shit, and throws the same tantrums as before.

The difference is that now she can speak perfectly and she's much smarter about how she gets what she wants.

And then MY GIRLFRIEND AND I HAD A BABY.

A baby girl.

We knew this could cause problems with this kid. And yeah, we were right.

She never liked my daughter. She would cry whenever she saw her.

Even before the baby was born, she was already pissed off at my girlfriend. She wouldn't talk to her, wouldn't say hello, nothing.

My girlfriend kept trying to force some kind of relationship between them and would buy her candy and toys to make her happy. Obviously, I was the one paying for most of that.

It didn't work.

My daughter is five months old now, almost six.

That's a pretty fucking long time to still call this "jealousy," which is what her family keeps saying.

She still ignores my daughter. She steals her toys. She throws tantrums when someone gives the baby a toy. She says the baby is ugly.

She'll literally tell my girlfriend that she wants to go say hi to the baby. Then she walks into the room and completely ignores her. Instead, she starts grabbing the baby's toys so she can take them with her.

I'm telling you this because I want you to understand how manipulative this kid can be with adults.

She uses the baby's stroller. She uses her crib.

She's FOUR YEARS OLD.

Does this sound normal to anyone?

And the part that pisses me off the most is that my girlfriend STILL wants me to buy her expensive gifts and useless shit.

Every time we go shopping, my girlfriend still puts candy for this kid in the cart.

Even after the way she's been acting toward my girlfriend because she had a baby girl.

And lately I've started giving the kid dirty looks when nobody else is around.

I've never done that before.

But honestly, her latest shit toward my daughter finally pushed me over the edge.

I fucking hate this kid.

And I know she's four. I know she's a child. I know she's probably not capable of understanding everything she's doing.

But I'm reaching a point where I genuinely don't know how to deal with the amount of anger I feel toward her, and I don't want that anger to turn into something worse.

I don't want to hurt her. I don't want to scare her. I don't want to become the fucking villain in this situation.

I just don't know what the hell I'm supposed to do anymore.

Hi, I (18F) just recently had a close friend of mine turn 19, it was a big deal of course and she wanted to hang out then go out to dinner to this expensive restaurant in town. I agreed even though the cheapest thing on the menu is around 40 bucks and between rent and needing to pay for uni i don't have to much extra money. During the dinner I gave her the gift i got for her, which was a 40$ gift card to her favourite coffee shop and some candy she likes. Now with dinner she ordered a lot of alcohol (the drinking age is 19 here) which i understand because you only become legal drinking age once may as well figure out what you like and don't like. I just had water, now the issue comes when the waitress came and asked if we wanted to split the bill or not, I said yes please and my friend looked at me like I killed her dog.

She said that she didn't get why I wouldn't pay for her meal as it was her birthday. I said that I got her a gift and that i wasn't even sure if i could legally pay for all the alcohol she got as i'm not 19 for another few months. She rolled her eyes at me and said she wouldn't have gotten all the alcohol and food she got if she had known she was paying. In my mind this just means that she wanted me to pay the 112$ she ended up paying because it was some kind of rule. If we had gone to a cheaper restaurant i might have considered paying for her food, somewhere were a burger is like 15 bucks and a beer is like 5 but i am in no financial situation to pay for an extra 112$, especially when all i ordered was a side salad and fries which was already around 35$. She didn't say a single thing to me while i drove her home and now friends are blowing up my phone calling me an asshole for not paying for her food.

aitah?

I (28F) have been with my boyfriend (46M) for just about 10 years. We have been engaged for 8 of those years and have two amazing girls, 8 and 6 years old.

My boyfriend is obsessed with this science fiction show, he tells me it was “groundbreaking” and “redefined the genre”. I always try to be supportive of his interests, ever since that whole ethereum debacle 7 years ago, so I’ve watched the show with him a few times. No matter how many times he pauses to explain things, I just don’t get it and keep not getting it, and then I ask him if we can watch Gilmore Girls after.

One time his friends, who are even bigger fans, were over to rewatch the show. At one point there was a particular character on screen, with whom my boyfriend is obsessed. One of his friends asked if I would give my boyfriend a hall pass to sleep with her, to which I answered “oh SURE, he should go for it. Hun, she would TOOOTALLY sleep with you! Be sure to not shave your back or ears, she will LOOOVE it”. Then I went into the kitchen while my boyfriend’s friends toasted him with “we all say it!” or some other cringey quote from the show.

Then came May of this year. My boyfriend and his friends put together a boys road trip to Ontario, or California or something, to attend some revolution convention, I think. When they came back they were really happy about all the actors and actresses they saw, the pictures they took and the autographs they got. One of his friends came back claiming he got a hickey from Mae Whitman, and I was like “her?”.

But then my boyfriend and his friends had a falling out a couple days ago. It was during that falling out that one of his friends contacted me and told me my boyfriend took me up on my word and indeed “went for it”.

At first I laughed and was like “yeah, sure, hope it was good”, but when I told my boyfriend he confirmed it had indeed happened. Again I called bullshit until he showed me the pictures. They were pictures of him and that actress, who still looks gorgeous at 52, in a hot tub, making out. Pictures of her in a hotel room wearing the very same little red dress she wore on the show, and a wig which looked completely natural and exactly like the way she wore her hair on the show. She was posing sensuously, her long, long legs in a semi wide stance with light from the bathroom coming through the dress in the space between her thighs, looking at my boyfriend with an expression that was a mixture of lust and predation, like saying “I could rip off your head, spine and all, while I ride you like the tauron boy you are”.

I was aghast that it had happened, and my boyfriend even showed me a message where she called him her “hairy Buccaneer”, to show me she indeed liked his hairy back and ears.

The worst part of it all, is that my boyfriend thinks he didn’t do anything wrong, because I told him to go for it. But how in a million years could I have thought that an incredibly beautiful woman was going to be into an overweight, late forties, hispanic, balding guy with a foot that swells due to water retention? I mean, for The One True God’s sake, who would be into him!? Well, as it turns out, an actress who performed an iconic role, that's who! But also, I only said he should go for it sarcastically, and I did lay it out pretty thickly too!

I feel dejected, tired, as if someone was hunting me down across light years, giving me no time to rest. I hate that show now, even though it defined a generation, and I hate that actress’ incredibly beautiful face and drop dead gorgeous figure. But I still love my boyfriend and I feel like a fool who underestimated his six appeal and wasted many a night feigning a headache.

How do I salvage this now?

And to top it all, he already planned a trip to Atlanta, Georgia, for this next September, for another convention. And she’s gonna be there! He has already paid everything unrefundably. He says I can come and he can even introduce me to that actress, but I worry I’d just try to fight her and she would definitely kick my ass.

Am I AIO?

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So say we all

So I started taking creatine a few months ago and I've been loving the results so far. I started at a low dose but I've been increasing it slowly. However I'm starting to worry about the dangers of overdosing. I feel really lucky to have found this subreddit so I can ask you guys about my concerns.

What should I be looking for in terms of overdose symptoms? How dangerous is a creatine overdose? Do different presentations have different risks? See, the main issue is that a couple days ago my wife informed me and her boyfriend that we are now poly, and introduced us to her three new boyfriends. They all seem very enthusiastic about boofing, which I am very appreciative of, but do you guys think it would be okay to ask if they and the previous bf can alternate weeks of boofing? Like the first week of the month one, the next another, and so forth? It's just that I'm not sure I can suddenly take a quadruple dose every day.

I'm looking forward to your advice.

I’m a wedding photographer. A few months ago I was hired by a couple who I didn’t meet in person until the wedding day, because they claimed they wanted all their pictures to be “unrehearsed”. Fine, the client is always right and all that. Actually, not always as you will see.

When I got there I couldn’t help but notice that the groom was pretty badly disfigured and paralyzed from the neck down. Of course I didn’t ask -the couple-, I found the most gossipy looking bridesmaid and asked her. She told me there had been a whole kerfuffle with the groom’s psychiatrist and in the end the groom had ended up cutting off his own face with a piece of broken mirror, also ended up with a broken neck due to autoerotic asphyxiation gone wrong.

Whatever, I did my job. They offered dinner, I didn’t take it, there was no way I’d be keeping it down.

While I was working on the pictures I did what I usually do and corrected blemishes, artifacts, balanced colors, improved light, fattened female guests who looked better than the bride, the usual. I also seriously improved the groom, which is another thing I have to do all the time, women be marrying some uggos.

In terms of fixing the groom there wasn’t a lot to work with, which is probably what the plastic surgeons also said, ayoooo! You know what I mean? But I pride myself in my work so I ended up replacing the groom with pictures of young Gary Oldman, Gary Youngman if you will. I did an impeccable job, if I do say so myself, integrating Gary Oldman into the pictures so they look absolutely natural.

I sent the finished product to the bride and would you believe it? This bridezilla called me in a tizzy, recriminating the improvements I’d made to the pictures. I explained to her that her groom, now husband, was indescribably hideous, and clearly some of those skin grafts were from different races, and if that was her kink it was her deal but the world deserved to not be mentally scarred by those images. She demanded I give her the original pictures but I told her I had them exorcized, then destroyed, then buried the hard drives in consecrated land which I salted for good measure. I also told her she was lucky I wasn’t charging them for the disposal.

The bride threatened to sue me and told me her husband’s family was extremely wealthy and well connected, so they were going to take me down. I told her the psychiatrist probably had a good reason. And that now it was clear why she was marrying what could only be described as walking beef jerky, could he walk.

I think she probably likes the pictures and has been constantly flicking it to them, imagining she married young Gary Oldman instead of patchwork boy, but is making a fuss to keep up appearances.

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Inspector Lestrade

My (31F) attraction for my boyfriend (26M) is slowly being murdered by a thousand tiny icks…

I know nobody is perfect. I have my own annoying habits and quirks. But over time I've accumulated a number of things my boyfriend does that have given me such severe second-hand embarrassment that I can practically feel my ovaries packing their bags.

Some examples:

He can't swim. Not "not a strong swimmer" he literally cannot swim. I don't think it would've turned into an Ick so much if every beach trip or spa visit he didn't make it his mission to attempt swimming (completely optional in these settings by the way), which results in him just flailing around like a drowning seal, making a lot of noise and drawing attention to himself. On our last spa visit another man came over and tried to advise him on how to swim (he did it in a very friendly, no judgment way) and my boyfriends night was totally ruined by how he felt this guy was trying to show him up in front of me. (No sweetie, you managed to accomplish that all by yourself). I've gently tried to teach him and suggested that he takes swimming lessons if he wants to attempt swimming on our outings, to which he dismissed as unnecessary.

He regularly talks in a baby voice and speaks complete gibberish. Sometimes this happens over the phone, or in the middle of a serious conversation. I carry on speaking to him in a normal voice and he carries on with baby talk, making me feel incredibly awkward and not knowing how I can get him to stop.

When walking out and about in public he'll suddenly become aggressively goofy. Things like repeatedly pulling me back and forth while loudly asking, "Can I throw you over here?" This will happen multiple times whilst we are out and I feel incredibly embarrassed when it happens.

He regularly turns his back on me in bed and asks me to spoon him.

Sometimes he'll randomly message me and ask me if I can send him £20 to treat himself to lunch. This will probably happen every few weeks. He says he wants princess treatment sometimes.. 👸

One day I drove my mums car (a big, long wheel base truck) and was having some trouble parking it in a shopping centre car park. He confidently told me to get out and let him park it, to which he proceeded to make an even bigger meal of getting the job done, taking a further 10 mins to park, where eventually he was successful only because a car in the opposite space had left, making it easy.

One time, on a trip we came across an empty children's playground area. For fun, I had a quick swing on the swing. My boyfriend then went to do the same. I very quickly realised that he in fact did not know how to even use a swing. His parents had never taken him to a play area to use one when he was younger which is kind of sad. But the image I have in my head of him flinging his body back and forth, trying desperately to gain some sort of momentum on the swing, but going absolutely nowhere is an image I wish I could erase from my mind 😬.

He says things like "Give daddy a kiss" to me in public... in a baby voice 🤢.

When spending time together alone, if he doesn't have anything to talk about (as one example) he'll randomly ask me to make the noises of different animals. "Can you make the sound of ___?” He'll ask. For a while I tried humouring him in these requests and would go along with it. However, this only made things worse as he would then progressively make further weird requests. So it got to the point where I just started saying "No, I don't want to, stop being weird". (Which by the way did not discourage him from doing such things as time went on). Sometimes i felt less like a girlfriend and more like I was being entertained in nursery circle time.

He tries very hard to be funny, but unfortunately his sense of humour and mine seem to exist in completely different dimensions.

The problem is that none of these things are actually serious relationship issues. He is incredibly immature in some ways, but where it matters he has shown a level of emotional maturity and emotional intelligence beyond anyone I've ever previously dated. He supported me through a tough few months of recovery following knee surgery. (Came to my home every day for 2 months, cooked me meals, helped with cleaning, supported me through physical therapy and was a constant emotional support, even when no one else, including my parents were not). He is loyal, completely devoted to me and would do anything for me. I know he would defend me and have my back in any situation. I know he would never talk poorly of me when I'm not in the room. I never have to worry about where he is going / what's on his phone because he is completely transparent with me. He has done some very sweet things, not just for me but my parents too. He will randomly gift me thoughtful presents. He'll put a full tank of fuel in my car when he sees it's on empty. He'll surprise me and make plans for us to go to new places. If he senses I'm feeling low and have had a bad day he will order me food from my favourite place. In regard to intimacy, he is the first and only guy who has truly tried to understand me and has been successful in working out what brings me pleasure. He is always sure to make me orgasm before he does. He regularly writes me letters which express his love and all of his sweet feelings for me. Not a day go's by where he doesn't tell me that he loves me. He gives his absolute best to the relationship in many ways. So yes, he does have a number of desirable qualities, which is how I guess I've managed to brush these 'icks' under the carpet up until now.

But collectively? The icks are becoming so powerful that I fear they're forming into a megazord. I'm becoming increasingly irritated and snappy in his presence, which I feel terrible for as he has done so much good in my life and he means no harm. Sometimes I think to myself maybe I’m being too harsh and too rigid and just I need to lighten up and embrace being more playful.. Other times the feelings of accumulated cringe just feels too much for me to override..

It feels wrong to say this, but it is what it is. I grew up in a very alpha home, my dad and older brothers introduced me to The Works of Tate very early on. I was raised properly to know that foids only want to screw you over so you become easy pickings for (((them))) and their System. So you have to screw foids first: give fake name, pump, impreg, dump, that's how you win at the game (((they))) train foids to have you play.

However, recently I got a little sad (as foidy as that is), after my dad and my older brothers went to jail for the stuff in their computers. And I know my father and older brothers are libertarian martyrs because they were just responding to the market. But somehow it was still a bummer to know they were selling that stuff.

I've been feeling too down to play The Game properly, so I started behaving beta. And I love it. Tate forgive me, but I love how it feels to give a wom- a foid genuine attention. Getting actually invested in what they do, listening to them talk about their actual interests, not spiking their drinks, opening up myself and telling them about the real me. It feels so good!

I could never tell this to my friends, or to my family on visiting days, they're the kind to say the government should lobotomize foids and put them in breeding camps, but I've learned how nice it is to have a connection. I've even had dates! With the same woman! More than once! I have even used condoms and not removed them surreptitiously! I can't explain the thrill it is to have sex with a foid- with a woman, and not make it be about winning one over her.

I know I'm losing my masculinity one beta gesture at a time. I know everybody in my life would disown me if they knew I've been seeing one particular woman on a semi-regular basis. But am I not being alpha by rebelling against their alphaness? Am I not reaching Sigma by deleting all of Tate’s content from my devices and doing whatever the fuck feels good?

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Inspector Clouseau

I feel so wrong for saying this but I can‘t deny it. I grew up pretty ugly and fat and now that I‘ve lost weight and got into makeup and fashion I had a big glow up. I love wearing tight tops to show off my figure or cute oversized fits. Whenever I walk around town I see guys turning their heads to look at me from inside the car or I see guys checking me out. My heart skips a beat everytime and I instantly feel all giddy. It‘s like validation for me like : yes you are pretty. you are not that ugly girl anymore.

With it, I grew way more outgoing and bubbly. But I would never say out loud that I like the attention. All my friends are pretty against male validation. They actively say kill all men and stuff like that. I would never dare say that I love when I see guys checking me out. I feel like such a bad person for it and I know maybe I am. I also love the idea of having a husband and pampering him and cooking and cleaning for him being maybe completely submissive. Again, I would never say that to them. I know that that doesnt need to be the role of a wife/girl and I obviously respect and support that. But those are just my preferences 😭

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I don't really know why I'm posting this. I think I just need to say it somewhere.

I left in February. Marcus was at school. I packed a bag and left a note and drove to my brother's. He's 12. I know.

People who haven't lived with Marcus are going to have a lot of opinions about this and that's fine. My own mother hasn't spoken to me since. My wife's friends have apparently been very busy. Whatever.

He broke his sister's arm last year. Everyone said it was an accident. I was standing right there. It wasn't. He's been expelled. He stole from my mom. He told my wife she was worthless so many times it stopped registering as something that happened. We did therapy for four years, four different therapists, and the last one actually pulled me aside and said something I'm not going to repeat but it basically confirmed what I'd been thinking for a long time.

Last Christmas he told me he wished I was dead and the worst part wasn't that he said it. It was how he said it. Like he was just mentioning something.

I left because of my daughter mostly. She's 9. She was getting quieter every year. You could see her shrinking.

Do I feel bad. Yeah I feel bad he's 12 and he came home to a note, I'm not a complete robot. But also I slept fine last night which I haven't done in years so.

I'm not going back. My wife keeps calling and I keep picking up and I don't know what she wants me to say. I don't have anything left for that house.

He's going to be so angry when he's older. I know that. I'm not ready to deal with it yet and maybe that makes me a coward but at least I'm being honest about it.

Anyway. That's it I guess.

So my father had an affair with his ex-wife. Almost immediately after their affair baby was born she wanted nothing to do with it, telling my dad to leave it at the fire station or do whatever. My father wanted to keep the affair baby so he was forced to move out of his ex-wife’s parents’ house, complicating their divorce proceedings and severely hurting his finances.

My mom had to be the one raising the affair baby, which became a huge source of stress for her. It ruined hers and my father’s would-be child-free wedding as they were forced to allow children just so my dad’s affair baby could be there, because there was nobody else to care for it.

The stress became so intense that my mom died while giving birth to me. My dad left, leaving me to be raised by my mother’s stepfather and his new wife. Of course my father took his affair baby with him.

Now, sixteen years later, I got a call from my father’s family. They're telling me my father died while escaping the scene of the crime and that his affair baby was on his own. They told me they thought me and my girlfriend should be the ones to adopt him, since I’m his closest relative and my girlfriend and I are actually pretty serious right now. I told them I wanted nothing to do with the affair baby, and that I blamed him for my mother’s death. They called me names, said I was immature and irresponsible and that I needed to step up. Then they actually waited for my girlfriend outside her high school and tried to drop the affair baby with her. When she ran away they yelled at her to talk me into adopting him.

I don’t know what to do. I already failed that assignment where they had us care for an egg as if it was a baby. Mostly because Miss Londegreen teamed me up with Sandy, who has a huge crush on me but my girlfriend is much hotter. Also I ate the egg.

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Inspector Gadget

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