He's manopausing, I'm perimenopausing. Augggghhh. It's so frustrating sometimes but we love each other so much. All you partners out there, how do you get through these phases without collapsing?
My daughter moved out a week ago, and my son is moving out in a couple weeks. My only two decided to grow up at the same time. I'm so proud, and our relationships are good, but I'm just so sad at the same time. This was unexpected, and I'm also going through perimenopause rn, so this is a triple whammy.
For those of you who have been through this, how long did It take to start feeling normal again?
2 months after my wedding, I'm sitting over here thinking all is bright and cheery in the world when I get a phone call from my brother. He said my mother was angry about my dress and she is going to disown me because I don't have "old fashioned values" anymore.
She's extremely religious and my dress was off the shoulder and low cut. My daughter and I made it and applied 200 silk flowers by hand.
I knew my mother would be disappointed by the dress and gave her a heads up before the wedding that it would be off shoulder. She and my dad chose not to come to the wedding, because of the dress.
Well, I called her after I talked to my brother and it was true. Without talking to me at all, she was going to disown me. IS THIS FOR REAL?? I'm still in deep shock over this.
Update: a lot of requests have come in to post the dress. I posted it in a comment on this thread.
THANK YOU all for your overwhelming support, insights, and thoughts on this. Thanks with all my heart to you all for being there for me when I needed you the most. This has been life-changing! ❤️ ❤️ ❤️
2 months after my wedding, I'm sitting over here thinking all is bright and cheery in the world when I get a phone call from my brother. He said my mother was angry about my dress and she is going to disown me because I don't have "old fashioned values" anymore.
She's extremely religious and my dress was off the shoulder and low cut. My daughter and I made it and applied 200 silk flowers by hand.
I knew my mother would be disappointed by the dress and gave her a heads up before the wedding that it would be off shoulder. She and my dad chose not to come to the wedding, because of the dress.
Well, I called her after I talked to my brother and it was true. Without talking to me at all, she was going to disown me. IS THIS FOR REAL?? I'm still in deep shock over this.
2 months after my wedding, I'm sitting over here thinking all is bright and cheery in the world when I get a phone call from my brother. He said my mother was angry about my dress and she is going to disown me because I don't have "old fashioned values" anymore.
She's extremely religious and my dress was off the shoulder and low cut. My daughter and I made it and applied 200 silk flowers by hand.
I knew my mother would be disappointed by the dress and gave her a heads up before the wedding that it would be off shoulder. She and my did chose not to come to the wedding, because of the dress.
Well, I called her after I talked to my brother and it was true. Without talking to me at all, she was going to disown me. IS THIS FOR REAL?? I'm still in deep shock over this.
My parents never reach out to me, except for matters of business, and never reach out to my kids - who are adults now. Well, my parents get upset with us when we don't reach out to them. Many of my siblings are like this, as well. Do you have this problem, too?
My parents never reach out to me, except for matters of business, and never reach out to my kids - who are adults now. Well, my parents get upset with us when we don't reach out to them. Many of my siblings are like this, as well. Do you have this problem, too?
I've been dealing with emotionally distant parents for 20+ years - ever since I left home. Before I left, my mother was extremely controlling and narcissistic. I've been trying to heal from that abuse all my adult life. My parents never talk to me or my kids or reach out. They have provided a lot financial support over the years, though, which I've been very grateful for.
I have many siblings by the same parents, and we all have complained about the emotional distance. Over the years, I've had to deal with siblings trash talking behind my back, but our parents have stayed neutral, though they never let us know what was going on unless we pried it out of them.
Now a days, we only meet during the holidays, and the family get togethers are crazy - about twice a year. My brothers constantly try to one up each other in their conversations and everyone else is extremely obnoxious and contending for the limelight. I gave up on this behavior years ago and just keep in the background. I have found these get togethers very difficult and go out of family obligation.
Well, my brother contacted me after a very peaceful spell and tells me that horrible rumors are going around about me that I'm spreading hate for my parents across the family, which isn't true, and that my parents are about to disown me. I call my mother and it turns out to be true! WTH, I'm sitting here all this time thinking that things are going well and then this bomb drops. No one came to me about it before this.
In talking to my mom, she's very convinced this is what she's going to do (disown me) and I spend a bunch of time trying to talk her back into some sense! She finally starts to understand me and apologizes for not coming to me first and it ends well. But she still fiercely protected the identity of the person who has been spreading lies about me and I told her to tell them to come talk to me.
I feel so utterly betrayed and hurt. There's still a family member out there that's spreading lies about me and won't talk to me.
Why, WHY did I talk her into keeping me??? Why didn't I just let her go away? She's caused so much grief over the years and yet, when I was finally off the hook I couldn't let her go. I know part of it was that I didn't want it to end that way, but I'm still so confused as to why I didn't just let this constant source of rejection and pain just slip away when I had the chance.
I've been dealing with emotionally distant parents for 20+ years - ever since I left home. Before I left, my mother was extremely controlling and narcissistic. I've been trying to heal from that abuse all my adult life. My parents never talk to me or my kids or reach out. They have provided a lot financial support over the years, though, which I've been very grateful for.
I have many siblings by the same parents, and we all have complained about the emotional distance. Over the years, I've had to deal with siblings trash talking behind my back, but our parents have stayed neutral, though they never let us know what was going on unless we pried it out of them.
Niw a days, we only meet during the holidays, and the family get togethers are crazy - about twice a year these days. My brothers constantly try to one up each other in their conversations and everyone else is extremely obnoxious and fighting for the limelight. I gave up on this behavior years ago and just keep in the background. I have found these get togethers very difficult and go out of family obligation.
Well, my brother contacted me after a very peaceful spell and tells me that horrible rumors are going around about me that I'm spreading hate for my parents across the family, which isn't true, and that my parents are about to disown me. I call my mother and it turns out to be true! WTH, I'm sitting here all this time thinking that things are going well and then this bomb drops. No one came to me about it before this.
In talking to my mom, she's very convinced this is what she's going to do (disown me) and I spend a bunch of time trying to talk her back into some sense! She finally starts to understand me and apologizes for not coming to me first and it ends well. But she still fiercely protected the identity of the person who has been spreading lies about me and I told her to tell them to come talk to me.
I feel so utterly betrayed and hurt. There's still a sibling out there that's spreading lies about me and won't talk to me.
Why, WHY did I talk her into keeping me??? Why didn't I just let her go away? She's caused so much grief over the years and yet, when I was finally off the hook I couldn't let her go. I know part of it was that I didn't want it to end that way, but I'm still so confused as to why I didn't just let this constant source of rejection and pain just slip away when I had the chance.