Just found out my husband of 10 years has been cheating on me while I was pregnant. Also going to “spas” to meet with prostitutes. Give me the best advice you have. Im confronting him tomorrow. I’m a SAHM.
My son is 5 years old. Dad and I have had a couple of months of arguing and some has been in front of our son. How can we do this in the least traumatizing way possible? I am heartbroken for him.
Starting oct 1 with my MBA HA program
Single mom of 3 looking for any advice on getting as many scholarships as possible
Postpartum. Going through divorce. I feel abandoned by Allah. And stuck. I cant pray.
After 3 kids and 10 years. Our youngest is only 2 months old.
After 10 years and 3 kids. Our youngest is only 2 months old. He told me he wants to see other people and he doesn’t love me anymore.
Diagnosed with adhd while pregnant with my third. I suspected it for a while. I should not have 3 kids I feel terrible for my children. They deserve a more put together mom. Also in a toxic marriage. My house is always a disaster. I haven’t been able to make many meals and always struggle with figuring out what to cook and having all of the ingredients/ taking the meat out etc. my son is 2 month old and I have an 18 month old and 5 year old. My husband is extremely toxic and doesn’t help with kids and at all. He only works. May be getting a divorce in the next couple months. I’m a SAHM. Unmedicated because of breastfeeding
Mother of 3 young kids trying to get out of a toxic marriage and would like to finish in a year please give me all your tips/tricks/help
Thank you!
My husband (29M) and I (29F) have been together 10 years married almost 7 years and have 3 young kids (5,1.5,and newborn).
I’m looking for advice from people who have actually gone through divorce with very young children, especially a newborn.
I’m not really looking for “leave him” or “stay for the kids.” I’m trying to understand what my **actual life would look like after divorce**, particularly regarding my children.
**My situation**
I have three kids:
• My oldest son is about 5 and is starting school soon.
• My daughter is about 18 months.
• My youngest is a newborn, born this summer.
I’m currently breastfeeding the baby.
My husband and I have had serious marital problems for a long time. There has been a lot of emotional conflict, yelling, insults, threats of leaving/divorcing, and periods where he has been extremely emotionally distant and angry toward me.
We recently discussed a trial separation. He has also said he wants a divorce and has been looking at apartments.
I have tried very hard to repair the marriage. We have been in couples therapy, and I have also been in individual therapy. At this point, though, I feel completely emotionally broken and exhausted. I don’t know if I can keep living in this cycle.
I am terrified of what divorce will actually mean for my children.
I keep imagining going from having my kids with me every day to suddenly having them away from me.
My newborn is especially what I’m struggling with.
He’s breastfed, he’s tiny, and I’m having a really hard time imagining someone telling me, “Okay, now your baby goes to Dad for X hours/days.”
I don’t know what is actually typical for a newborn in a Maryland custody situation.
Would a newborn normally spend nights away from the breastfeeding mother?
Would the father initially have short daytime visits and gradually get longer periods?
At what age do overnight visits typically start?
How does breastfeeding affect parenting time?
And what happens with the toddler? Would she be on a similar schedule?
I obviously understand that their father is their father and I don’t want to keep my children from him. I want them to have a relationship with him. I’m just scared of suddenly having my baby away from me.
**I’m also scared about my oldest**
My oldest is starting school soon. He’s already having a difficult time emotionally with everything going on at home.
I’m worried about disrupting his life even more.
How do divorced parents usually handle school when one parent has the kids part of the week?
Do children generally stay in the same school and parents work around the school schedule?
**What would my actual week look like?**
This is probably the thing I can’t wrap my head around.
Right now I’m with my kids basically all the time.
If we divorced and Dad had parenting time, what would a normal week actually look like?
Would I potentially have several days without my kids?
Would I have the baby most of the time initially because of breastfeeding?
Would a 5-year-old have a completely different schedule from a newborn and toddler?
I’m trying to mentally prepare myself for what my life could look like rather than just imagining the absolute worst.
**Financially**
I am currently a stay-at-home mom. I previously worked remotely, but I left my job after having the baby because I need to care for the children.
We have savings, but I currently don’t have an income.
I’m also worried about housing, child support, health insurance, daycare/school expenses, and how I would eventually return to work.
I have a bachelor’s degree and previously had a reasonably good-paying remote job, so I’m not planning on never working again. I just don’t want to put a newborn into full-time childcare immediately if I don’t have to.
**My questions for people who have actually lived this:**
**1. What does custody/parenting time realistically look like with a breastfeeding newborn?**
2. How quickly do overnights usually happen with a newborn?
3. How does custody work when you have a newborn, toddler, and school-aged child at the same time?
4. Do courts generally create different schedules based on the ages of the children?
5. What does a typical week look like for the primary parent?
6. How hard was it emotionally the first time your children stayed with their other parent?
7. Did your children adjust better than you expected?
8. What did your life actually look like 3–6 months after divorce?
9. What do you wish you had known before filing?
10. If you’re in Maryland specifically, what should I know about the custody process?
11. Should I speak with a family-law attorney before filing even if I’m not 100% sure yet?
12. Is there anything I should financially or practically organize **before** filing?
I’m not asking Reddit to decide whether I should divorce my husband. I’m already seriously considering it because I’m exhausted and I don’t think I can continue living the way we’ve been living.
I’m just scared.
I’m scared of losing time with my babies.
I’m scared of my newborn being away from me.
I’m scared of being financially on my own.
And I’m scared that I’ll make a decision that changes my children’s entire lives.
I’d really appreciate hearing from people who have been through **divorce with a newborn/infant**, especially breastfeeding moms. I want the honest version—not just “you’ll be fine,” but what the day-to-day reality actually became for you.
One of my biggest concerns is the pattern of toxic behavior and whether it can actually change. There have been periods of intense anger, yelling, insults, demeaning comments, threats of divorce/leaving, emotional withdrawal, and then moments where he becomes warm or acts like everything is okay again. It can feel like he completely flips between being loving/normal and being extremely angry, resentful, or disgusted with me, which makes me wonder about things like emotional dysregulation, “splitting,” or even possible BPD, although neither of us has a diagnosis and I don’t want to armchair-diagnose him. I’m also worried that the behavior could escalate or become worse if we separate or divorce, especially because there have already been situations where I’ve felt intimidated and afraid to bring up certain subjects because I expect the conversation to turn into an attack. For anyone who has experienced something similar, **can this kind of pattern genuinely change?** What does meaningful, sustained change actually look like? Is it possible for someone to stop the yelling, insults, threats, emotional cruelty, and extreme reactions if they genuinely commit to therapy and accountability, or do these patterns usually continue/get worse without significant long-term treatment? I’m trying to figure out whether I’m looking at something that could realistically improve or whether I’m holding onto temporary good moments and hoping they’ll become permanent.
My husband (29M) and I (29F) have been together 10 years married almost 7 years and have 3 young kids (5,1.5,and newborn).
I’m looking for advice from people who have actually gone through divorce with very young children, especially a newborn.
I’m not really looking for “leave him” or “stay for the kids.” I’m trying to understand what my actual life would look like after divorce, particularly regarding my children.
My situation
I have three kids:
• My oldest son is about 5 and is starting school soon.
• My daughter is about 18 months.
• My youngest is a newborn, born this summer.
I’m currently breastfeeding the baby.
My husband and I have had serious marital problems for a long time. There has been a lot of emotional conflict, yelling, insults, threats of leaving/divorcing, and periods where he has been extremely emotionally distant and angry toward me.
We recently discussed a trial separation. He has also said he wants a divorce and has been looking at apartments.
I have tried very hard to repair the marriage. We have been in couples therapy, and I have also been in individual therapy. At this point, though, I feel completely emotionally broken and exhausted. I don’t know if I can keep living in this cycle.
I am terrified of what divorce will actually mean for my children.
I keep imagining going from having my kids with me every day to suddenly having them away from me.
My newborn is especially what I’m struggling with.
He’s breastfed, he’s tiny, and I’m having a really hard time imagining someone telling me, “Okay, now your baby goes to Dad for X hours/days.”
I don’t know what is actually typical for a newborn in a Maryland custody situation.
Would a newborn normally spend nights away from the breastfeeding mother?
Would the father initially have short daytime visits and gradually get longer periods?
At what age do overnight visits typically start?
How does breastfeeding affect parenting time?
And what happens with the toddler? Would she be on a similar schedule?
I obviously understand that their father is their father and I don’t want to keep my children from him. I want them to have a relationship with him. I’m just scared of suddenly having my baby away from me.
I’m also scared about my oldest
My oldest is starting school soon. He’s already having a difficult time emotionally with everything going on at home.
I’m worried about disrupting his life even more.
How do divorced parents usually handle school when one parent has the kids part of the week?
Do children generally stay in the same school and parents work around the school schedule?
What would my actual week look like?
This is probably the thing I can’t wrap my head around.
Right now I’m with my kids basically all the time.
If we divorced and Dad had parenting time, what would a normal week actually look like?
Would I potentially have several days without my kids?
Would I have the baby most of the time initially because of breastfeeding?
Would a 5-year-old have a completely different schedule from a newborn and toddler?
I’m trying to mentally prepare myself for what my life could look like rather than just imagining the absolute worst.
Financially
I am currently a stay-at-home mom. I previously worked remotely, but I left my job after having the baby because I need to care for the children.
We have savings, but I currently don’t have an income.
I’m also worried about housing, child support, health insurance, daycare/school expenses, and how I would eventually return to work.
I have a bachelor’s degree and previously had a reasonably good-paying remote job, so I’m not planning on never working again. I just don’t want to put a newborn into full-time childcare immediately if I don’t have to.
My questions for people who have actually lived this:
1. What does custody/parenting time realistically look like with a breastfeeding newborn?
2. How quickly do overnights usually happen with a newborn?
3. How does custody work when you have a newborn, toddler, and school-aged child at the same time?
4. Do courts generally create different schedules based on the ages of the children?
5. What does a typical week look like for the primary parent?
6. How hard was it emotionally the first time your children stayed with their other parent?
7. Did your children adjust better than you expected?
8. What did your life actually look like 3–6 months after divorce?
9. What do you wish you had known before filing?
10. If you’re in Maryland specifically, what should I know about the custody process?
11. Should I speak with a family-law attorney before filing even if I’m not 100% sure yet?
12. Is there anything I should financially or practically organize before filing?
I’m not asking Reddit to decide whether I should divorce my husband. I’m already seriously considering it because I’m exhausted and I don’t think I can continue living the way we’ve been living.
I’m just scared.
I’m scared of losing time with my babies.
I’m scared of my newborn being away from me.
I’m scared of being financially on my own.
And I’m scared that I’ll make a decision that changes my children’s entire lives.
I’d really appreciate hearing from people who have been through divorce with a newborn/infant, especially breastfeeding moms. I want the honest version—not just “you’ll be fine,” but what the day-to-day reality actually became for you.
One of my biggest concerns is the pattern of toxic behavior and whether it can actually change. There have been periods of intense anger, yelling, insults, demeaning comments, threats of divorce/leaving, emotional withdrawal, and then moments where he becomes warm or acts like everything is okay again. It can feel like he completely flips between being loving/normal and being extremely angry, resentful, or disgusted with me, which makes me wonder about things like emotional dysregulation, “splitting,” or even possible BPD, although neither of us has a diagnosis and I don’t want to armchair-diagnose him. I’m also worried that the behavior could escalate or become worse if we separate or divorce, especially because there have already been situations where I’ve felt intimidated and afraid to bring up certain subjects because I expect the conversation to turn into an attack. For anyone who has experienced something similar, can this kind of pattern genuinely change? What does meaningful, sustained change actually look like? Is it possible for someone to stop the yelling, insults, threats, emotional cruelty, and extreme reactions if they genuinely commit to therapy and accountability, or do these patterns usually continue/get worse without significant long-term treatment? I’m trying to figure out whether I’m looking at something that could realistically improve or whether I’m holding onto temporary good moments and hoping they’ll become permanent.