u/Final_Print_5679

Hi, I’m looking for any and all advice from people who have been or currently are/had in therapy to deal with your feelings, relationships, when splitting, when things get too intense, how to manage this disorder really.
I’m currently diagnosed but I don’t have access to therapy or any good mental health care, I’ve been actively searching for care ever since I was diagnosed but I can’t find anyone or anything in my area or affordable.
I’m asking so I can manage this a little better during this time while waiting to access to care.

I have been helping people on this sub daily for the last week, and now I’m the one asking for help, I feel pathetic honestly.
I took 400mg of ritalin today, I felt my body giving up and I decided to take lots of benzos to make it stop. right now I wish I would have just let my heart stop.
My last relationship was with a girl that cheated on me, for her I told the girl that actually loved me for who I am that we should not be together.
I tried talking about this to my closest friend and he was just trying to contradict my feelings that are still present for her, the girl that actually gave a sht about me.
Then he just blamed me, telling I caused him to go through a psychotic episode just because I told him to stop belittling my feelings.
I have been clean for a year, I stole a pencil sharpener I just want to make them regret right now.

Sup I’m an alternative guy
Very open minded, I’ll respect whoever you are
love music
love One Piece
Tattoos
Drag, femininity not afraid of it
True crime, niche subjects
Good listener if you need to chat/vent
No right wingers/ bigots I’ll flame you

It’s been 3 hours since someone posted anything so thought I’d do it, it’s 1:20 right now where I am.
What are y’all doing right now ? what’s really keeping awake.

So if you’ve been diagnosed with any mental illness, what is it and why do you sh most of the time.

I’ll start, I have been diagnosed with BPD with heavy ASPD traits, those traits make it that most of the time I did it out of boredom, to do something to deal with my constant need for thrills.

Share your experience as someone diagnosed with BPD with comorbidities especially with other cluster b PD.
It can be socially or internally, generally how it impacts you or others.

I want this post to be very open, share anything you deem like experiences influenced by your personality disorder.

It’s not easy to find any information especially people talking about living with it on the internet, this is an attempt to make it more seen and understood.

Share your experience as someone diagnosed with BPD with comorbidities especially with other cluster b PD.
It can be socially or internally, generally how it impacts you or others.

I want this post to be very open, share anything you deem like experiences influenced by your personality disorder.

It’s not easy to find any information especially people talking about living with it on the internet, this is an attempt to make it more seen and understood.

Share your experience as someone diagnosed with BPD, ASPD and NPD or comorbidities between these disorders.
It can be socially or internally, generally how it impacts you or others.

I want this post to be very open, share anything you deem like experiences influenced by your personality disorder.

People who’ve been diagnosed with ASPD what are symptoms that are not talked about enough that you experience ?

So I’ve been diagnosed with BPD, I’m a trans man, I seriously think my potential personality disorder has been brushed over because of my gender identity. I believe I do have a cluster B disorder. I lack empathy, I have manipulative behaviors to get what I want, and I just see people as tools to get what I want. I’ve harmed animals as a child and teen, I’ve seriously thought and planned homicide. I don’t feel any guilt about anything I’ve done but I know by logic and analysis of people’s behavior and thinking (to the best I can) that it’s wrong but I can’t seem to feel sorry, ashamed or guilty about anything I’ve done. I don’t consider myself as better than anyone, I just don’t care, but when I do a favor to someone I expect something, at least gratitude and if I don’t get anything in return I just get this feeling of anger, frustration and hate, and do everything I can to ruin their relationships therefore their mental.
I know all of this is wrong and despicable but I can’t seem to bring myself to feel sorry for doing any of this.
I’m going to see a psychiatrist soon, still, it would be great to have insight from people who’ve been diagnosed on my situation, it’s a way for me to know where to start.