u/Foreign-Educator-857

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- Mr. Silva, you’re in very good shape for a 40-year-old.

- And who said I’m 40?

- How old are you?

- I just turned 57 in March.

- No way! And how old was your father when he died?

- And who said my father died?

- Oh, sorry. How old is your father?

- The old man is 81.

- 81?! That’s great! And how old was your grandfather when he died?

- And who said he died?

- I’m sorry. How old is he?

- 103, and he still rides a bicycle.

- That’s wonderful! And your great-grandfather? What did he die of?

- And who said he died? He’s 124 and he’s getting married next week.

- Now that’s too much! — says the doctor, annoyed.

- Why would a 124-year-old man want to get married?

- And who said he wanted to get married? He didn’t want to… but he got the girl pregnant!

A rabbit was hopping through the jungle, unbelievably horny, but couldn't find another rabbit anywhere.

After a while, he spotted a female elephant standing in a stream, peacefully drinking water.

The rabbit thought, "Well... that'll do!"

He scrambled up her leg, climbed onto her back, and started going at it.

Up in a nearby tree, a monkey had been watching the whole thing and was laughing so hard he could barely breathe.

Wanting to stir things up even more, the monkey grabbed a coconut and hurled it at the elephant's head.

THUNK!

Startled, the elephant threw her trunk into the air and let out an enormous scream.

Without missing a beat, the rabbit yelled:

"Hurts, doesn't it?!"

Fiquei sem serviço Fibra em casa na quarta feira, dia em que liguei para o apoio ao cliente para reclamar.

Disseram que era um problema com a ligação do exterior para o prédio e que iam enviar um técnico para resolver.

Hoje é sexta-feira à noite e até à data ninguém veio. Já liguei ontem e hoje a reclamar e a conversa é sempre a mesma. Já enviei também um email com a reclamação.

Há mais alguma coisa que possa fazer? É inadmissível estar estes dias todos sem serviço.

I have a Find X8 Pro and just got a gimbal and when I use the ultrawide camera, the gimbal appears on the right side.

Due to the camera layout, there's nothing I can do about it

I need a gimbal for my work and now I've got to change phones. Can't afford to change it for a X9 pro unfortunately.

Just here to warn someone who's thinking about buying a phone with the same camera layout.

https://preview.redd.it/w1bl162v4f9h1.png?width=657&format=png&auto=webp&s=11badcfe48697b8f487ed2822936a61607f75e7a

I lost my NOX AT10 and I'm looking to buy a new racket. Unfortunately my budget is really low at the moment so I saw this racket for 80€. But I can´t find any information about it.
I'm looking for a budget control racket.

Vi hoje um rodapé na CMTV (não me julguem, estava num café a dar) que o Benfica estaria interessado no Fàbregas do Como. Sendo a fonte que é, para mim vale o que vale, mas o que acham?

Sei que fez uma excelente época no Como com uma média de golos bastante positiva, o que para mim é bom sinal. Mas sinceramente não sigo o futebol italiano ao ponto de entender se seria uma boa opção ou não.

Estou a ver que esta novela com o Mourinho vai hipotecar a hipótese Marco Silva.

Tenho uma varanda fechada em marquise onde tenho problemas de bolor por causa de uma máquina de secar que vai deixar de existir. Em principio o problema do bolor também.
Já limpei todo o bolor mas agora tenho de tratar das paredes.
Qual a opção que aconselham? Quero algo relativamente simples e económico porque o dinheiro não abunda de momento e sou eu que vou fazer. Penso que o azulejo seja a melhor opção, mas também deverá ser a mais cara e complicada de eu fazer.

1. Pintar com tinta plástica e anti-fungos
2. Pintar com membrana elástica
3. Revestir parede com azulejos
4. Revestir parede com placas de PVC (vi no Leroy umas para colar em paredes)

I haven't played much this past year and I want to get back to playing more often. I had a Nox AT10 Genius 12k 2023 (black and green) and I really liked it, but unfortunately I lost it. I want to buy a new one but I don't want to spend too much money because, as I said, I play very little. What control racket can I buy for under 100 euros? I don't mind if it's an older model. I'm in Portugal so I'll probably be buying from a Spanish website, because it's cheaper.

I don't have much time to play games, so I prefer games that I can play for 20-30 minutes a day. Currently I'm playing PES 2017, Need for Speed Hot Pursuit (I'm not enjoying it much), and Ratchet & Clank. I tried Ghost of Tsushima and RDR2, and although I liked them, they're games that require a lot of time investment, which I unfortunately don't have. So, that's it, I need game recommendations, please.

PS: I'm not a big fan of driving games but I wanted one. The last one I liked was Burnout on the PS2. Fun and not too hard. I tried Burnout Paradise but I don't want an open world game.