u/Fulana25

My mom is having her reversal surgery this week and I am trying to gather supplies she may need. I'm searching thru this group for suggestions, but am also wondering what type/brand diapers do you recommend for #2 accidents (I'm also familiar with baby diapers and with adult Depends (which seem to be more for pee accidents?)?

She's in complete denial that she'll need anything. Her surgeon is good but he overemphasized what a breeze the whole thing will be, so she's brushing off my trying to tell her that she may have a lot of urgency and go #2 often and should be ready for that, so I'm just going to have some things ready for her. Thanks for any advice you can give

I just got a Holga 120 Wide Pinhole Camera and git the JCC cable release for it, but the cable does not consistently open the shutter window all the way,. It varies how much it opens it each time. If I press the shutter directly without the cable, it opens fine, so the shutter is okay on that front -- is this a compatibility issue with the cable? I read that the cable pin has to be "long enough' to press all the way, but nowhere can I find what that amount is nor which cables work specifically for this camera. All I read was any standard cable release should work, so I am left confused. Would love some clarification before my return window closes on the camera, because I most definitely won't be using it if I have to hand press long exposures.

I think Fancypants could be an amazing and iconic Housewife in another franchise. She's rich AF, out of touch as far as luxury and money, but still so in touch with her humanity and some social issues. She's funny, full of herself, smart, sassy, has a fun husband that she has a real partnership with, and her family life is very interesting. BUT the women of OC are all so jealous of her money that there's no room for Heather to show us her full range. They are constantly scapegoating her, so Heather is having to tone herself down to try and have some allies. Her whole dynamic is constantly having to defend herself for existing. I also think the constant growling, yelling and hooting from Tamra, Vicki and Shannon is deeply low brow for a Heather type, and Gina and Emily have zero class.

She needs to be in a franchise with richer Housewives so that her money stops being such a factor in her getting f-ed with. I fully understand why she wants to switch to Beverly Hills, though sadly, many of those women are also penny pinching now. They need to give her and Vanderpump and a few other lavish Housewives their own franchise. I think that's why Heather is gravitating toward Camella, she's got a "trashy" past, but she's got money and at least won't resent Heather for that. It's such a stupid thing for a Housewife's money to be a problem, but Heather has had to contend with that since her start. I wish we could see a full version of her.

I am cooking for my mom to leave her meals after her colon resection and ostomy surgery. I'm thinking of making her a squash and carrot soup, but I read that fibrous cruciferous vegetables are no good, but is that just if they're raw? If I cook and blend butternut squash and carrots in a soup, should that be gentle enough for her system? She's been eating pasta, potato, rice and proteins and some other cooked veggies at her rehab, but I still want to not make her anything that might cause her pain. Would love your feedback, and also suggestions on snacks for her (she's 80, Caribbean and super picky and can't eat a lot of dairy so cheesesticks and yogurt won't work, I'm a bit at a loss for snack ideas)

This season feels so geriatric with them bringing Vikki back. Shannon was already playing a bit of the fuddy duddy clueless old lady in the group (and I actually think she does it well and she makes me laugh), but when you have multiple Housewives doing the old lady bit, the whole show gets weird.

It's giving similar vibes to RHONY last two seasons, when the women just seemed like drunken old ladies fussing over their knees and gastrointestinal accidents 😂. Before someone says I'm being ageist, I'm in my 50's and would LOVE to see a "Golden Housewives" series with all the older Housewives (minus Vikki), but I watch regular Housewives for a different vibe 🤷🏽

My 80 year old mom (no cognitive issues) will talk for hours, like non-stop will just talk at you about anything and everything, past and present. I know it's not uncommon for elderly, but she's always been like that, it's just worse now. It's honestly the hardest part of caretaking, there's never silence, she traps me on the phone for 1-3 hours daily. I have all kinds of evasive maneuvers I make to walk away or get off the phone, but it's still exhausting. I don't want to just manage this on a moment by moment basis, mostly I just get stranded listening to her forever. I want a way to tell her that I just cannot listen for that long. The thing is, she gets super sensitive and will take almost any feedback the wrong way and then make the whole thing hostile. I could just let it be hostile, but first I want to try for a productive and kind understanding. How do I explain that she needs to stop talking at me for so long and set actual time limits on it (20 min daily call would be ideal for me). I understand that when/if she has cognitive decline, she won't be able to control it, but right now, how do you talk at someone for 3-5 hours straight and expect their focused attention. It's a form of torture for an introvert! By the way, she's not saying anything important, nothing bad usually, but also nothing of relevance ... and it's not a loneliness issue, she ALSO talks to a bunch of friends and family all day long, she spends most of her waking day talking to people on the phone (or friends that visit), it's not like I'm the only person she has to talk to. Please help me! I'm a person that is not talkative and needs a lot of silence AND I'm too busy for this! I used to just not touch base much when she was healthy/ younger but now I do have to check in daily to make sure she's okay (and occasionally stay with her to care for her) so I get trapped!

My 80 year old mom (no cognitive issues) will talk for hours, like non-stop will just talk at you about anything and everything, past and present. I know it's not uncommon for elderly, but she's always been like that, it's just worse now. It's honestly the hardest part of caretaking, there's never silence, she traps me on the phone for 1-3 hours daily. I have all kinds of evasive maneuvers I make to walk away or get off the phone, but it's still exhausting. I don't want to just manage this on a moment by moment basis, mostly I just get stranded listening to her forever. I want a way to tell her that I just cannot listen for that long.

The thing is, she gets super sensitive and will take almost any feedback the wrong way and then make the whole thing hostile. I could just let it be hostile, but first I want to try for a productive and kind understanding. How do I explain that she needs to stop talking at me for so long and set actual time limits on it (20 min daily call would be ideal for me). I understand that when/if she has cognitive decline, she won't be able to control it, but right now, how do you talk at someone for 3-5 hours straight and expect their focused attention. It's a form of torture for an introvert! By the way, she's not saying anything important, nothing bad usually, but also nothing of relevance ... and it's not a loneliness issue, she ALSO talks to a bunch of friends and family all day long, she spends most of her waking day talking to people on the phone (or friends that visit), it's not like I'm the only person she has to talk to.

Please help me! I'm a person that is not talkative and needs a lot of silence AND I'm too busy for this! I used to just not touch base much when she was healthy/ younger but now I do have to check in daily to make sure she's okay (and occasionally stay with her to care for her) so I get trapped!

Our 80 year old mother just had major surgery that will take months of recovery. Prior to this, she was healthy and independent living in NYC. Her children live in MD and TX. She lives in public housing, has Medicare and Medicaid. After the hospital, she will go to a subacute rehabilitation facility in NY but after that, she may still need some care. We want to bring her to MD so we don't travel back and forth so much BUT would she lose her benefits if she stays out of state while she recovers?

Getting an OMNY payment declined message a full day after I took the train. I'm just here briefly so I don't want to set up an OMNY account, but now OMNY wants to keep putting thru this change (I used a card on my Google wallet on my phone). If I tap again at a turnstile, will it recover the charge then let me through with another tap OR will that just make the problem worse? Will it block me from entering if I try to tap in?

I freaking knew I should just stick with a MetroCard (can we even still get those or does it all require an account online?) Like I said, I'm here temporarily and come in occasionally, but zero desire to have a whole permanent relationship with the MTA. Has anyone successfully solved this DECLINE MTA charge situation?

Getting an OMNY payment declined message a full day after I took the train. I'm just here briefly so I don't want to set up an OMNY account, but now OMNY wants to keep putting thru this change (I used a card on my Google wallet on my phone). If I tap again at a turnstile, will it recover the charge then let me through with another tap OR will that just make the problem worse? Will it block me from entering if I try to tap in?

I freaking knew I should just stick with a MetroCard (can we even still get those or does it all require an account online?) Like I said, I'm here temporarily and come in occasionally, but zero desire to have a whole permanent relationship with the MTA. Has anyone successfully solved this DECLINE MTA charge situation?

My 80 year old mom was passing small black clots for the last 3 days. She's got diverticulitis, spent two weeks in hospital last month for an infection, perforation and then abscess. She was discharged once she was stable with antibiotics to continue at home (finished those 2 weeks ago). Recent scan showed abscess is still there. She saw her doctor on Thu but wasn't bleeding the so they just gave her a referral to the colorectal surgeon to plan for surgery. Then she started the clots over the weekend. I JUST found out because she thinks it's "a good thing" like the abscess is"coming out" and maybe she won't have to have surgery. I'm making her call the doctor today. If you went thru this, what did it ends up being?

I have a permanent disability. The form from my doctor I first uploaded states that I have a disability, lists the specific diagnosis and limitations and that the condition expected to last 60 months or more (it's lifelong, but the form was phrased as such). They denied it because it doesn't say "permanent." So I then uploaded another form my doctor has filled out for me that DID say "Total and Permanent Disability" and also included the limitations and diagnosis, but that got denied because the "uploaded document is not an approved document type." I assume because it's not in the form of "a letter" (it was a pdf). What on earth! Both those documents were enough for way bigger business than a park pass, but not good enough for them? The review came back so fast I wondered if it was done with AI or a computer, not a person. I tried to contact their help chat and the person was just like, they have strict criteria --- umm, yes, and I meet those, I just don't have a letter format, but the documentation is very clear.

I don't want to make a whole doctor visit and pay a copay for this, and bother my doctor because they've already verified this for me in other paperwork, and to keep going back to say "can you say that I'm disabled again in this other way" just feels ugh!

What am I missing here because people keep saying it's not hard?

Are there more options than the restaurant that has a pizza for $30 on their menu. Planning to go in the fall and researching food options and was a bit taken aback, but still early in the process, so maybe I'm missing something? We'll be staying in the cabins (no microwave nor fridge)

Our 80 year old mother is dealing with a health issue (recently hospitalized). She has medicare and medicaid. She was given some help at home right out of the hospital through Medicare, but that was short-lived and ends this week. She likely will not qualify for a Medicaid home attendant since they changed the stand-alone housekeeping service, and now clients need to have 3 ADL needs to qualify. Anyway, we are thinking of trying to hire someone temporarily as we wait to see if she recovers to her previous functioning level. We're thinking 8 hours per week would be a great help to just get her groceries, pick up meds and do some light cleaning. How much do they generally get paid? We're assuming the agencies charge more than an individual?

This is a complicated question and I plan to maybe see an elder lawyer. My siblings and I are concerned about the following type of scenario. Elderly mother with some health issues that will require surgery. She lives alone and has done okay so far. For her long surgery recovery, after rehab, she may need to stay with one of us (another State) temporarily until she can go home. If, for some reason, she didn't recover well enough to be able to go home, and needed to find assisted living instead, would she be considered our legal dependent just by having lived in our home prior? is there a point that she becomes a legal dependent by default if she's in our home? Basically, we are trying to take care that our finances and assets dont get caught up in the AL/ nursing home / rehab world. Maybe it's a non-issue, but our worry about ever having her stay in our homes for long periods is that any place we apply to for elder housing afterward may consider us financially responsible for her if she's going from our home vs her own place She currently lives in public housing, has Medicare, Medicaid, and social security

This is a complicated question and I plan to maybe see an elder lawyer. My siblings and I are concerned about the following type of scenario. Elderly mother with some health issues that will require surgery. She lives alone and has done okay so far. For her long surgery recovery, after rehab, she may need to stay with one of us (another State) temporarily until she can go home. If, for some reason, she didn't recover well enough to be able to go home, and needed to find assisted living instead, would she be considered our legal dependent just by having lived in our home prior? is there a point that she becomes a legal dependent by default if she's in our home? Basically, we are trying to take care that our finances and assets dont get caught up in the AL/ nursing home / rehab world. Maybe it's a non-issue, but our worry about ever having her stay in our homes for long periods is that any place we apply to for elder housing afterward may consider us financially responsible for her if she's going from our home vs her own place She currently lives in public housing, has Medicare, Medicaid, and social security

My 80 year old mother has diverticulitis, but she doesn't understand it well. She has mentioned for a couple of years about this and was on antibiotics at some point for it, but it has not been very bad to this point. Well, she just spent two weeks in the hospital with a perforated diverticulitis and massive colon infection and inflammation that also impacted her appendix. She's back home now and we are helping care for her, she will also have a home aide soon. We got a short list of foods to eat and foods to avoid, but honestly it's not entirely useful plus my mom is Caribbean and the list is very mainstream American type of foods that she wouldn't have in her repertoire. She's really struggling with what to eat. We all could use a crash course education in what this is and how to manage it. Would appreciate any educational resources that you have. Thank you

The few I found on amazon are ridiculous price (and not quite 100gsm). Where should I be looking? Thanks

I need to make a copy of apartment keys. Where can I copy keys, ideally on the upper west side/ wash heights / harlem

(p.s. lowes & home depot didnt work for these when i tried out of town)