u/Fun_Macaron1921

Dated my first boyfriend for 5 years and we broke up 5 years ago, in that meantime I was in a 3 years relationship and I’ve been content with life…

I ended my last relationship because I realized this wasn’t the love of my life, I’m now 26F and in an active search for my future husband and I’ve come to the realization all the values and interests are what my ex from 5 years ago already had… we ended things after I was going to move away / he admitted to cheating once before

Tbh I think I was more inlove with him than he was with me, I wanted to marry him

For context he was down to earth, calm, responsible, funny, creative, genius level smart (engineer with a masters at a prestigious school), humble, organized, deeply felt things just as I do and we shared the same niche interest in music… I’m realizing now that I’m back in the dating scene, I can’t find anyone that meets even 1/4 of these things and it’s hard to not feel this pit in my heart to realize that was my soulmate

I still love him so much and I’m convinced I’ll never find someone that makes me feel so seen again

I’m so frustrated that he couldn’t love me as much as I loved him, I’m frustrated because i don’t know if he even feels this same thing I do or maybe he’s completely moved on and found an amazing girl

I feel like I’ll get these comments of like don’t compare anyone and try to put yourself out there but trust me I am trying and I didn’t realize the traits I was looking for very intentionally were traits he had, I feel like I just realized everything I’m looking for he had

Hey guys, I legit feel awful because this guy seems sweet and he’s really cute! We set up a date for tomorrow but the more we’ve talked the more info that has come out and he low key lied on his profile about his profession..

I feel terrible but I don’t think we’re a match considering I’m a medical doctor, super ambitious, type A and pretty academic (plays violin, loves classic literature and art museums etc)

The more we talked he told me he had a period in which he was homeless and I just feel absolutely terrible because he does seem like a sweet guy but I don’t think our lives align in the long run unfortunately, I’m currently looking to find my husband

I also feel incredibly guilty going out and letting him pay for even a coffee which isn’t great, I feel like the right thing is to just be up front about me not thinking we’re a match but I feel like an absolute dick

Is it better to go on the date and then blame it on a romantic spark?

I don’t know what to do guys, I was fine dating someone that wasn’t a doctor or something crazy like that but I don’t think it’s a right fit to go with someone that’s unemployed :(

Update: Texted him that we’re not a right fit and he responded super kindly and I actually cried cause I feel TERRIBLE, but yea I think it was the right move, wishing him the best!

I think being the eldest daughter and a doctor has always put me in a position to want to help others to the point I sometimes overextend myself so I’m working on having more self control over that )-:

Practice scores:
NBME 9 - 246 (3/11)
NBME 10 - 236 (3/21)
NBME 12 - 242 (3/30)
NBME 11 - 240 (4/5)
NBME 13 - 251 (4/14)
NBME 14 - 242 (4/24)
NBME 15 - 253 (5/3)
UWSA2 - 251 (5/10)
NBME 16 - 249 (5/20)

Free 120 (5/23) - 83%

Real Step 2 (5/30): 265

Literally so insane! I never hit 260 on my practice tests but on my last week I really honed in on my weaknesses and realized it wasn’t content that was missing but test taking strategies and overthinking!

I feel like day of the 20 question blocks was a lot better than 40 because you had to think through it fast and not overthink; it was straight up vibes

When I got out of the exam I balled my eyes out for an hour in the car because I was so sure I failed, the exam seemed so vague and I wasn’t sure if majority of answers which really freaked me out, I guess going with your gut really is the key and I can answer any questions in the comments!

Don’t give up, you guys got this !! I’m not a genius, i feel like I’m regular smart but what I can say is I’m absolutely passionate about what I do and work really hard! Studied 10-14 hours daily

26F Matched with this cute 25M and I noticed he really wanted to be texting me, like if I just liked a message a couple of hrs later he’d re-open the convo with something, anyways it’s been about a week now and he had asked me out but I’ve been a bit busy so our first date is in a couple of days… (the texting has been casual like how our day is going, hobbies etc.)

Well the past 2 days he’s definitely been more flirty and I’m just wondering like is it a bad idea to be that kind of like direct before we even meet?

Our texting has been pretty interesting and we both like to joke around, he has a nice physique so he’s also sent a couple of pics where he’s *casually* shirtless and I’m really into him …

My profile has long term relationship and monogamy and it’s pretty wholesome so I think my vibe is clear and his says long-term open to short but one of the prompts definitely tells me he’s more sexually open, I’m a sexual person but only really when there’s trust and love worked into it (on the other hand it’s been about a year since I last kissed someone so I think that’s also making me more prone to flirt it up a bit more with this guy than I normally would, but I’m a bit shy)

I’m just worried I’m giving the wrong impression because I’m not someone that moves fast when getting to know someone..

Part of me is like nothings out right explicit and I’m 26 so it’s fun and flirty and we’re young and we’ll see the vibes in person, but I talked to my sister and she says it’s not a good idea to be texting someone so much before you’ve ever even met, i definitely see her point

I’ve been in 2 long-term relationships for the past 9 years and am freshly re-entering the dating world (4 months ago broke up with my long distance boyfriend) so idk if I’m doing this thing right

I don’t edit my pictures much and included a full body pic just so people are aware of my size, I’m so scared of meeting someone in person and them being disappointed, part of me feels like since I’m not skinny I feel like guys won’t actually like me?

Logically speaking I have been in two long term relationships before and a handful of dates and guys have liked me but idk I don’t trust it? My friends and fam call me pretty but also like they’re my friends and fam, I’ve also had strangers come up to me and tell me how pretty I am but last time this really happened was 4 years ago when I was 30 lbs lighter :/

Anyways..

This guy liked my profile and I matched with him and he’s been pretty eager to talk to me, he pretty much has like abs and biceps etc and I’m just like is her sure he understands I’m not skinny?? Like can someone that is so fit be into someone that doesn’t look like that???

He followed me on Instagram and I have more pictures there that include my body and it’s been going good but I have this horrible fear this man is severely confused on what I look like and he asked me out and I’m actually terrified, I really enjoy talking to him and even when the conversation dies down a bit he’ll make an effort to keep the convo going and we have a lot of things in common

I just find him so attractive and I don’t know, I don’t trust it

(I’m 5’1 and about 145 lbs for reference, also I haven’t been on a first date in 3 years since I got out of a relationship 6 months ago)

Honestly it felt like no amount of preparation could’ve prepared me for that, I feel like I wasn’t even reading through the questions because there was no time; I’m looking back and it’s like did I even think through this??? I got out and balled my eyes out for an hour cause I’m scared of what will be my result, I’m trying not to manifest the feared outcome so I’m not saying it but I’m really worried

My NBMEs have been solid but I feel like the NBMEs were so not representative and it felt like there was a lot of niche weird things that idk how on earth I was even supposed to figure that shit out

NBMES have been in 250s and it feels silly I was wishing to get around this on the exam, now I’m just hoping I pass

I feel like I hallucinated the whole fucking exam and I wish I could go back, like did I even read the options or just pick the first thing that I felt like clicked

How did yall feel? Fuck I hope I pass dude

I’m so happy!!! I was wondering what an 83% is in three digit score??

Also how did you guys feel free 120 compared to step 2 real deal?? I felt pretty comfortable and I felt like crap taking NBME 16 last week, idk if it’s because I’ve worked on my test taking skills or if free 120 is easier??

I wanna practice reading the long stems but I’m worried the questions aren’t that high yield, don’t know if I should just focus on cms and nbmes

Looking so I can revise each question as I answer it! I saw online it doesn’t let you and you have to wait till the end of the exam to do see answers

Idk if it’s just me but I swear it happens every time hahahaha

Not like diarrhea or nothing but as soon as I feel the effects of my meds coming in (focus increases, get a bit colder, maybe heart beats a little faster) I get an immediate feeling that I need to go to the bathroom and poop

I feel like I’m at a level of stress where it kind of feels like I’m doing too much and too little, I’m not sure if I actually know things… I’m so tired and I’m worried I’ve just been drinking too much coffee, food doesn’t taste great at home and all I want to do is eat out and there’s day I just can’t be cooking or making nice balanced meals and that bums me out too

On top of this my sibling is coming down with a cold and now I’m hyper paranoid of getting sick when my test day is so close, I’m so mad??? I know it’s not their fault but I went as far as to start OCP to delay my period to make sure I’m 100% on test day and now there’s this

I just wish I lived alone and I didn’t have to interact with anyone, I don’t want to talk to anyone, I don’t want to worry about getting sick UGH

I just want to cry and I feel so stressed

I’ve done all the NBMEs and UWSA2 and take free 120 on Saturday

NBME 13: 251
NBME 14: 242
NBME 15: 253
UWSA2: 251
NBME 16: 249

Honestly if I end up scoring a 250 I’m more than happy and want to maintain these scores but I’m really worried I’ll underperform on the exam, NBME 16 felt so weird and the HPI questions really tripped me up

I’ve done Amboss most of the 200 concepts and all the QI, currently working through ethics

Should I be doing uworld incorrects?

Should I be doing 1 CMS per day 2 CMS? (I’ve done pretty much all the CMS except psychiatry and Neuro since I didn’t feel like it was high yield but realized they were my weaker areas, I also haven’t done the latest surgery and IM one that’s online, should I pay for them?)

I have like 8000 flashcards

Should I also do the old free 120?

Should I just revise all my nbmes??

Should I do mehlman HY pdfs?

I’m feeling like I don’t know anything and I’m kind of freaking out, NBME 16 fucked me up and I don’t know if I’m ready for this

It just doesn’t feel like there’s enough hours in a day and every time I get a question wrong it’s like fuck why is my reasoning the worst, I’m worried day of I’ll overthink everything or under think or just straight up realize it was all luck until now

Like is BMI of 25 enough to recommend weight loss? Or does it have to be straight up obesity >30

As a general recommendation, BP, lipids, diabetes

I just keep getting these questions wrong on when weight loss is the right answer (obvs not talking about BMI of 42)

Is it 1 stop meds then dantrolene?

Ok there was alot of wtf questions that I did NOT recall specifics

- peutz instestinal hamartoma
- well differentiated carcinoid tumor management
- PNH complications
- RTA/juxtaglomerular cell hyperplasia/liddle sx
- amblyopia

Like wtf did I miss a whole fucking chunk of shit I’m supposed to know?????

Exam is in 9 days and now idk what the fuck to focus on cause I haven’t seen ANY of these on the NBMEs

I don’t know what to do

>!Pregnant patient with hyperthyroidism and it said treatment to start at this moment… I chose propranolol because she’s symptomatic right now and the answer was PTU???!<

>!But I swear I’ve gotten other questions and they say BB first to relieve symptoms and now I’m confused af wtf!!!<
>! !<

Took NBME 16 today and it felt like a cluster fuck, honestly I wasn’t feeling too bad on my nbmes and have been getting 250s on NBME 14, 15 and UWSA2 and today it felt like I don’t know anything

It felt so nit picky and different than the other nbmes and my confidence is low, I felt like I guessed through half of the exam

NBME 16 ended with a 249 which isn’t terrible but I’m getting mortified my luck will run out on test day, I have so many flashcards and still have Amboss to go through with ethics and I also haven’t revised CMS for Neuro or psych and idk what to do

I’m at the edge of tears and I just don’t feel as ready as I thought I would, I feel like 12 days away I shouldn’t be learning new shit but it feels like I have so much to learn from NBME 16

Fuck, Im just so overwhelmed

Worried if I get asked a lipid screening question on a 25 year old with no risk factors, wtf would I choose??

(Also I meant starting at 20, at 35 and at 45)

Taking the exam in 2 weeks!

What should I do on Amboss?? Should I also do all the ethics questions?? (100)

I took birth control for about a year 4 years ago and definitely had my hot girl summer, I attributed it to me recently becoming single but now that I’m back on the pill I’ve noticed I’ve just been hella thinking about what’s going on down there.. I feel like I’ve been wetter than usual and I get so horny!!

I’m not that much of sexual of a person but I keep thinking about sex which I literally never do, wtf!!