u/GroundbreakingPear12

Hi everyone I 25F have been dealing with vaginismus since losing my virginity at 17. After lots of time and practice, I can now insert tampons and my own fingers (up to 3) with little to no pain and can go in and out. I also have plus one dialators and finished the biggest size. Depending on the guy, I can also be fingered. The only thing that doesn’t work is PIV. I did try it today with a guy and first we tried missionary which didn’t work then we tried riding. While it was initially in, it did hurt and I started feeling lightheaded after a little and it kept falling out. He is so nice about it and said he still liked me and everything but we didn’t have time to try again. I feel like I let him down and I’m so so so frustrated I just want to have normal sex.

Hi everyone I am going into my second year of teaching first grade, and am remaining at my same school. This year we are doing a CKLA “soft launch” for K/1, as it is already used in 2/3 at my district. We will only be doing the knowledge part, as we use a different phonics program. Does anyone use CKLA in first? Do you like it? What does the knowledge lesson look like in your first grade classroom? Give me all the details.

Hi everyone! I am an incoming second year first grade teacher in a small district. I am also 25 and live with my mom about 30 minutes from school. I have seriously been thinking about moving out and wanting to but honestly just can’t afford it bc I make 50k in Massachusetts and I’m single.

So a parent of one of my kids from this year sent me an email earlier today. In January this parent got married and moved to a neighboring town but completed the school choice process so the child has remained at my school. The email was an invite for me to rent her house in the town I teach in (their old house) for cheap for the winter months.

While I do want to move out, I’m not sure this is a great idea. It feels like a conflict of interest, even though her child is moving to second grade and is no longer my student. Also I really don’t know that I want to live in the town i teach in. But also I do want to move out and have more independence. What should I do? For context this parent is also a teacher in another district.

Hi everyone! I am an incoming second year first grade teacher in a small district. I am also 25 and live with my mom about 30 minutes from school. I have seriously been thinking about moving out and wanting to but honestly just can’t afford it bc I make 50k in Massachusetts and I’m single.

So a parent of one of my kids from this year sent me an email earlier today. In January this parent got married and moved to a neighboring town but completed the school choice process so the child has remained at my school. The email was an invite for me to rent her house in the town I teach in (their old house) for cheap for the winter months.

While I do want to move out, I’m not sure this is a great idea. It feels like a conflict of interest, even though her child is moving to second grade and is no longer my student. Also I really don’t know that I want to live in the town i teach in. But also I do want to move out and have more independence. What should I do? For context this parent is also a teacher in another district.

Hi everyone I 25F just had my world rocked. For context I have a history of vaginismus and painful penetration. Anyway a while ago I met this guy on tinder and a couple weeks ago we went for a hike. I think he’s 26M. Today I went to his and it was MAGICAL. We kissed when we got to his room then he took my pants off and he started eating me out hard. Usually it doesn’t feel like much but today it was almost too much and like a building and release feeling. Then he tried to finger me. At first it hurt like usual but after fingering myself for a while and putting his one finger in myself it worked. Idk what he did in there but it changed my life. I can’t really describe it but he said he was like flicking his finger on my g spot and it was soooooo good. For some parts his finger was inside while we were making out and at another point he was eating me out while fingering me. After a while I was done but just wanted to love on him and cuddle with him. I felt very cuddly. Did I have my first orgasm? He made me feel so safe and comfortable I loved it.

Hi everyone! For context this past year I was a first year first grade public school teacher in Massachusetts. I was in a one year position covering a maternity leave but the person I was covering isn’t returning so I was able to return next year and will be doing so. While I did not have any formal observations this year from my AP, my principal mentioned when giving me the job offer back in April that I was indeed evaluated, so I will be on my second year in terms of tenure and pay scale. I just got a form on vector called formative evaluation. For the professional practice and student learning goals I got significant progress (I know we did this as a first grade team). For the standards (curriculum/planning, teaching all students, family engagement, professional culture, overall) I got a proficient rating with no other comments. It said moving forward I have a developing educator plan. What does all this mean? Trying to talk myself off of the ledge here. Thank you!

Hi everyone! I am going to be a second year first grade teacher in the fall. While overall this year was a success, I did have some issues with classroom management (not based on anything my admin said, I just felt like my room was chaos at times). When my paraprofessionals were in the room, things would go pretty smooth and I’d be able to teach effectively and it would be great.

However, we had lots of staffing switches, especially towards the end of the year. Out of my 19 kids, while most of them listened to me no matter what, I had maybe 5 boys that would be silly when my paras weren’t there. And the para wasn’t assigned to any of these kids. They would do things like say no to work, wander the classroom during independent work time or teaching time, talk during lessons, and I had one that even would try to make a “show” to make other kids laugh.

At the beginning of the year, I wrote a list of expectations with the kids (they came up with what to write on the class promise). For the whole class I had a Pom Pom jar where kids would put them in for being kind, working hard etc and I would put them in for when the whole group was following the plan. With the couple of kids who weren’t listening, in the middle of the year I would talk to them first thing in the day about expectations to preview it. A couple kids were on positive reinforcement charts. I tried contacting families. It was only in January or so tho when I started having the kids who weren’t listening repractice routines, etc.

It wasn’t a matter of these kids can’t follow the group plan, it was obvious they were choosing not to. The moment my para would walk back in they would immediately fix it, which honestly made me feel pretty angry. When I did ask these kids about why they are not listening, they said it’s because “you’re not strict”. I started having heavier consequences in the middle and end of the year but it didn’t do much. I tried then trying to catch them doing a great job which would sometimes help but not always.

My question for early elementary teachers is what do you do for classroom management in your classroom? My goal for next year for myself is to be “nurturing but no nonsense”. Please help because I can’t have my kids not listen this year too.

Hi everyone! I am going to be a second year first grade teacher in the fall. While overall this year was a success, I did have some issues with classroom management (not based on anything my admin said, I just felt like my room was chaos at times). When my paraprofessionals were in the room, things would go pretty smooth and I’d be able to teach effectively and it would be great.

However, we had lots of staffing switches, especially towards the end of the year. Out of my 19 kids, while most of them listened to me no matter what, I had maybe 5 boys that would be silly when my paras weren’t there. And the para wasn’t assigned to any of these kids. They would do things like say no to work, wander the classroom during independent work time or teaching time, talk during lessons, and I had one that even would try to make a “show” to make other kids laugh.

At the beginning of the year, I wrote a list of expectations with the kids (they came up with what to write on the class promise). For the whole class I had a Pom Pom jar where kids would put them in for being kind, working hard etc and I would put them in for when the whole group was following the plan. With the couple of kids who weren’t listening, in the middle of the year I would talk to them first thing in the day about expectations to preview it. A couple kids were on positive reinforcement charts. I tried contacting families. It was only in January or so tho when I started having the kids who weren’t listening repractice routines, etc.

It wasn’t a matter of these kids can’t follow the group plan, it was obvious they were choosing not to. The moment my para would walk back in they would immediately fix it, which honestly made me feel pretty angry. When I did ask these kids about why they are not listening, they said it’s because “you’re not strict”. I started having heavier consequences in the middle and end of the year but it didn’t do much. I tried then trying to catch them doing a great job which would sometimes help but not always.

My question for early elementary teachers is what do you do for classroom management in your classroom? My goal for next year for myself is to be “nurturing but no nonsense”. Please help because I can’t have my kids not listen this year too.

Hi everyone I live in MA but just got back on a hiking trip to southern Utah and Vegas last week. Today I used dandruff shampoo but was itching my scalp and could feel a bunch of dry flakes. Is this a sunburn or dandruff? How do I get rid of it? I have curly hair that I wash twice per week. Should I start washing my hair more often? Thank you!

Hi everyone I 25F don’t consider myself a virgin but I have vaginismus that started when I first started having sex at 17. Penetration from someone else of any kind is usually pretty painful or impossible and my nervous system goes into a fight or flight mode. Anyway me and one of my friends of like 5 years hung out today he’s 28M and we decided to try to have sex. He doesn’t normally wear condoms but I’m not on bc so I insisted he get condoms. When he tried to go in me I was laying on my back on the edge of the bed while he was standing and my legs were kinda on his shoulders. He rubbed his thing on the outside of my vagina but when it was time to go in there it was just kinda slipping. He said it was on him bc he’s not used to condoms and it makes him go soft.

Anyway then we tried fingering which in the past has not worked bc my body freaks out. However I can finger myself which doesn’t feel like anything and I can use tampons. He put in his middle finger and it felt different than anything I’ve really felt. It was like a pressure and like air bubbles were going in. I was trying hard not to release any air lol. But then I just started hysterically laughing. I can’t say it was orgasmic but it didn’t hurt. It felt nice nice but in a weird way. And it felt like he was UP THERE. And he was like ur soooo wet and there was a thick liquid on his finger when he pulled out his finger and of course he ate it lmao. Anyway is that what penetration is supposed to feel like? My body did get pretty anxious and actually went to kick him at one point. But I tried hard to remember that it wasn’t actually hurting.

Hi everyone I 25F live currently with my mom and siblings in central Massachusetts. I did go to college and got my bachelors degree and I now work full time as an elementary school classroom teacher. While I have a full time job that requires a degree, I made 49k before taxes this year and will be making 53k next school year. The other expenses I have are 240 a month for my car loan, about 300 a month for student loans and currently my car insurance is like 270 however since I’m now 25 I am looking into how to make that less. I also need to get my masters and am starting that in the fall which will be another expense. Can I afford to move out? What would that look like? I do have 80k total saved between my checking and savings accounts right now. My family suggested I could even get a condo so I can resell it but that seems like a big commitment and know nothing. Please help as I would like to move out and feel more independent but also I’m scared at the same time. I do have a couple other side hustles that bring in income but it doesn’t feel significant enough to include it and I want to be conservative with my budget.

Hi everyone I 25F live currently with my mom and siblings in central Massachusetts. I did go to college and got my bachelors degree and I now work full time as an elementary school classroom teacher. While I have a full time job that requires a degree, I made 49k before taxes this year and will be making 53k next school year. The other expenses I have are 240 a month for my car loan, about 300 a month for student loans and currently my car insurance is like 270 however since I’m now 25 I am looking into how to make that less. I also need to get my masters and am starting that in the fall which will be another expense. Can I afford to move out? What would that look like? I do have 80k total saved between my checking and savings accounts right now. My family suggested I could even get a condo so I can resell it but that seems like a big commitment and know nothing. Please help as I would like to move out and feel more independent but also I’m scared at the same time. I do have a couple other side hustles that bring in income but it doesn’t feel significant enough to include it and I want to be conservative with my budget.

Hi everyone I am a first grade teacher and I have a question for admin that is purely out of curiousity. I’m in elementary for context. At my school teachers create class groupings that then get assigned to teachers (for example I am a first grade teacher so my team made the second grade groupings for next year). Currently it’s class A, B, C etc. my question is how does admin then decide which group gets which teacher? Is there thought involved or is it just random. At a previous school, my principal said that in his eyes any teacher should be able to work with any class. Is there a process or is it truly random? I am very curious.

Hi everyone I am 25F in the US if that helps. So I tend to be pretty depressed and since December have been feeling bad about not having a bf and as ppl are getting engaged it makes me sad bc I want that too. Yesterday my cousin announced she and her longtime bf were engaged. She’s about 2 years older than me. It wasn’t a shock but it sent me into a spiral. I am close with her and on one hand now that I have a clearer mind I’m happy for her. I wanna see her happy bc she deserves it. But on the other hand I was visibly upset bc I want that for myself. I feel like I deserve to announce an engagement just as much.

My family tells me to stop throwing a pity party for myself and to fake being happy but it’s so hard to do that. I have been convincing myself I’m never getting married bc my head tells me I’m just not good enough. I hate myself for not being happy for her, but I can’t force my feelings. Then I saw her at a grad sparty today and she was showing off her ring to everyone. I had taken anxiety meds before going to numb myself but I felt sick at first and did not look at the ring and did not bring up her engagement. As the party went on I did become less emotional about it and said congratulations to her a couple of times. Then tn I sent her a longer and honestly fake text about being super excited for her. My mom said at the party it was obvious I’m depressed and that I need to get over it. But I can’t just snap out of it.

Love is a fable,
Love is a tall tale,
Love is something I want but is never for sale.
It looks easy from the outside, something everyone wants,
But it is hard to see everyone else falling while my own psyche rots.

Oh how I have tried, 
And how I have felt false feelings of success,
Who will ever love me?
At this point I believe no one,
Who would love me, as I am a pest.

Maybe one day things will change,
I will see a bright light,
But as my cousin gets engaged, 
I wish her absolutely no delight.

I want to cheer and applaud,
I want to be level headed,
But every time they mention their happiness,
My own mental health feels like it has been shredded.

I do not like myself for saying this,
But I do hope that they feel sad,
Even though I love them,
Their despair would make me feel less bad.

Love is a fable,
Love is a tall tale,
Love is something I want but is never for sale.
It looks easy from the outside, something everyone wants,
But it is hard to see everyone else falling while my own psyche rots.

Oh how I have tried, 
And how I have felt false feelings of success,
Who will ever love me?
At this point I believe no one,
Who would love me, as I am a pest.

Maybe one day things will change,
I will see a bright light,
But as my cousin gets engaged, 
I wish her absolutely no delight.

I want to cheer and applaud,
I want to be level headed,
But every time they mention their happiness,
My own mental health feels like it has been shredded.

I do not like myself for saying this,
But I do hope that they feel sad,
Even though I love them,
Their despair would make me feel less bad.

Love is a fable,
Love is a tall tale,
Love is something I want but is never for sale.
It looks easy from the outside, something everyone wants,
But it is hard to see everyone else falling while my own psyche rots.

Oh how I have tried, 
And how I have felt false feelings of success,
Who will ever love me?
At this point I believe no one,
Who would love me, as I am a pest.

Maybe one day things will change,
I will see a bright light,
But as my cousin gets engaged, 
I wish her absolutely no delight.

I want to cheer and applaud,
I want to be level headed,
But every time they mention their happiness,
My own mental health feels like it has been shredded.

I do not like myself for saying this,
But I do hope that they feel sad,
Even though I love them,
Their despair would make me feel less bad.

Hi everyone! Today marked my last day of school for my first year of teaching, and first year in first grade. Overall the year went great and although it was originally a one year position I ended up being able to stay at my school in first grade again next year. While overall the year was great, my biggest problem was that at the beginning of the year I did not do a good job of practicing routines and mainly holding kids responsible for following behavior expectations. I let a lot of things slide I think. I did have paras that were more “strict” than I was so when they were there the class was in check. However days they were not there or I was solo there would be like 5 boys that would be wild. Wandering the room, ignoring me, refusing to participate, being distruptive to the point I could not teach (yelling out, being silly to the point everyone would get derailed). While I started getting stricter with consequences around March, it was really challenging to change the dynamic that far in the year. So, for any K-2 teachers, how do you set up your classroom management to foster positive relationships, while also not allowing nonsense? This is my biggest goal for next year.

Hi everyone! Today marked my last day of school for my first year of teaching, and first year in first grade. Overall the year went great and although it was originally a one year position I ended up being able to stay at my school in first grade again next year. While overall the year was great, my biggest problem was that at the beginning of the year I did not do a good job of practicing routines and mainly holding kids responsible for following behavior expectations. I let a lot of things slide I think. I did have paras that were more “strict” than I was so when they were there the class was in check. However days they were not there or I was solo there would be like 5 boys that would be wild. Wandering the room, ignoring me, refusing to participate, being distruptive to the point I could not teach (yelling out, being silly to the point everyone would get derailed). While I started getting stricter with consequences around March, it was really challenging to change the dynamic that far in the year. So, for any K-2 teachers, how do you set up your classroom management to foster positive relationships, while also not allowing nonsense? This is my biggest goal for next year.

Hi everyone I am finishing up my first year as a first grade teacher and there have been some hard days but overall it was a great experience. Originally my position was filling a maternity leave for one year but the person resigned so I will be returning again with first grade next year at my school. Should I write a thank you note to my admin or is that too much for someone who will be returning next year?