u/HazardousChisle

So when I was a kid my aunt was dating this guy was some type of muscular disease. He ended up being an abusive piece of shit but she said he was freakishly strong for his size. It's fuzzy because I have a lot of that part of my life blocked out but I believe she said something along the lines of his muscles were basically turning to Stone and in a few years he would be immobile. That being said she said that he's constantly basically flexing or like tense. She has said he has literally thrown her across the room and has seen him pick up an almost 400 lb man. So my question is that without that disease, would being in a state of constant tension actually help develop muscle or would it lead to more harm than good.

Let me pre face this by saying I understand how cringe and cliche this is going to sound. But I've genuinely been like this since my early teens and I just don't understand... So. As the title says. I just don't care about my feelings. I can know what I'm feeling. I can understand why I'm feeling it. But I just don't ask how a person would typically act when feeling certain things. Like when I know I'm over simulated and there's just too much shit going on. Most people start the panic or get upset or just express that they need to take a break right? I guess I just. Ignore it? Like I feel my chest getting tight and my mind going a million miles an hour and i cant focus. But like. I don't outwardly react. Sometimes I find me reminding myself to look happy in situations that I should be happy in. And I am happy it's just like my body doesn't respond normally. It's all the feelings. When I'm tired. When Im stressed, when I want to hurt someone. I feel it. I understand it. But I just don't care enough to act on it. Now don't build your own image of me as some lazy bomb inside your head. I was a full-time job going in 5 to 6 days a week that I've had for 4 years I'm engaged and getting married in September and I recently became a dad. I am a hard worker but it is difficult for me to express myself. Like I just said we just had a kid not that long ago and I want to be able to healthfully teach her about emotions and feelings. I can't do that if I don't understand myself...

They're literally the most pathetic, power hungry, authority abusing, fully grown used fucking condoms. No offense to the nice ones of course. But I'm currently permanently banned from a general help sub. Wanna know why? Because I'm going to be a dad today and I make a post asking for advice since I don't have family to walk me through this. Mf removed my post. I appealed and it to HOURS for a response. His reason? Uhhh well your post was too vague. You can just ask for tips you have to ask for specific advice like a loser. This MF couldn't make one single exception for somebody that really needs help and it's just posting "my cat turned away from me what should I doooo. I mentioned that to him. Hey man. Like I genuinely have nobody. There's a lot of people here giving me some really good advice. And they were able to understand it enough to answer. So I don't know why dont understand it enough to remove it. But it's whatever. I already posted it in another sub that someone from this removed post told me about. He said something about well I apparently had no problem finding it. Which I did because I didn't know about it before. So I explained how I found it and the little cock sucker fucking banned me. I know not all mods are pos. But from the many interactions I've had with many mods. Most of you suck. Wouldn't even be surprised to see this removed. Anyways. They're losers whose entire life is reading and removing from a thing that's not even important. Also. Idk which flair to pick.

So I posted this in r/advice. But the cunts removed it and I didn't even get a notification. It's been awhile and I'm yet to hear back about why it was removed since I made sure I followed all rules. BUUUUUUUUTTTT. Yeah. First time dad here. I have no family on my side to speak of. No support system if I stumble and I'm struggling to wrap my head around it and damn she's not even born yet but I'm already worried about her not having to sides to our family like most do. I'm 22 and there's no one in my corner. I don't have anybody to ask for fatherly advice. I don't have a mom to vent to when my day just gets hard. I don't have a family to do what a family should and I think I'm scared. I've been busting my balls to afford stuff since she quit her job at 4 weeks and I'm so very tired is this what it was like for y'all before the baby. I'm drowning guys, to be quite honest. I could really just use any advice y'all have. Please.

So yesterday I wanted to smoke a pork shoulder. And did. For the most part. About 30 minutes after I had it on I had to head out and my wife watched it for me. Unfortunately I haven't taught her about that kind of cooking so she just threw a bunch of coals on top of the lit ones. Had he send me a pic and had he remove most of them. When I got back the grill read about 120ish. Fast forward a couple hours and it's raining moderately. Keep in mind it's also been sprinkling on an off all day. So it was hard to keep temp. Anyways. It was getting late and the middle was still reading 150 something so I said screw it and brought it in to finish it off covered in the oven with brown sugar and butter. Well I did that and got it out. I set it to cool and fucking stupidly fell asleep. So now I've got a smoked and baked pork shoulder thats been sitting out about 6 or 7 hours and I'm mad and I feel stupid. I put a glove on and squished it some. A lot is tender. Some are still firm but the middle was still warm. I'm an idiot, should I just throw it all out to not risk it?...