u/IWillBaconSlapYou

​

Anxiety runs on both sides of the family, and boy did she catch it. She's had a therapist before but just never opened up to her (and she didn't have appointments outside of school hours, so it was only for the summer last year). I think she just wasn't silly enough, too clinical, my girl doesn't like feeling analyzed or put on the spot, and humor is a big diffuser in our family.

This therapist is funny and personable and my daughter was just starting to open up to her after three appointments.

And then she didn't show up. Messaged at the last second about technical issues. Rescheduled. Messaged at the last second about accidentally injuring herself. Rescheduled. Messages AFTER appointment start time about vertigo. She was very apologetic and yesterday we agreed on giving it one more try today at 11:30. Even though I'm sick TO DEATH of arranging my life day after day after day around an appointment that never happens, it was important to me to stick it out because my daughter actually likes her.

This time? No show, no message, no response. Nothing. Just ghosted. And my poor girl, she says to me "Mom, maybe she doesn't like me."

YAY THERAPY THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED HER TO GET OUT OF THIS.

So I scheduled with someone else for tomorrow and sent a message wishing the old therapist well with her health issues... Pray for me that my girl connects with the next one. I'm so frustrated right now. I feel like I wanna cry, this is so stupid.

Anxiety runs on both sides of the family, and boy did she catch it. She's had a therapist before but just never opened up to her (and she didn't have appointments outside of school hours, so it was only for the summer last year). I think she just wasn't silly enough, too clinical, my girl doesn't like feeling analyzed or put on the spot.

This therapist is funny and personable and my daughter was just starting to open up to her after three appointments.

And then she didn't show up. Messaged at the last second about technical issues. Rescheduled. Messaged at the last second about accidentally injuring herself. Rescheduled. Messages AFTER appointment start time about vertigo. She was very apologetic and yesterday we agreed on giving it one more try today at 11:30. Even though I'm sick TO DEATH of arranging my life day after day after day around an appointment that never happens, it was important to me to stick it out because my daughter actually likes her.

This time? No show, no message, no response. Nothing. Just ghosted. And my poor girl, she says to me "Mom, maybe she doesn't like me."

YAY THERAPY THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED HER TO GET OUT OF THIS.

So I scheduled with someone else for tomorrow and sent a message wishing the old therapist well with her health issues... Pray for me Bromos that my girl connects with the next one. I'm so frustrated right now. I feel like I wanna cry, this is so stupid.

We've done everything we were going to do. All three kids did their day camps (one of them did two). We went on two road trips. We've been to like 12 birthday parties. Fourth of July parade/cookout/fireworks show. Mariners game. Five nature walks. Three lake days. Kayaking. Pool x 10000. Sprinkler/above ground pool out back every single day.

And we're just out of ideas. There's nothing left to do. Dad is WFH and I'm a SAHM. The kids say they want to stay home but by noon they're driving each other crazy. Usually they get along really well! I take them out and they're hot and bored and tired. Some days I can't take them out because of the smoke.

And I'm just cracking. Every day is the same and they're just getting so so obnoxious the more bored they get.

Just now we started our morning, and immediately middle kid (7) is crying her eyes out because she's stuck in some game she's playing, goes to watch TV in my room but I guess the remote isn't working, so huff huff sob. Oldest (10) gets out of the bath and says it won't drain. Youngest (6) super casually says "Oh yeah that's because I stuffed the drain with paper".

FUCK? COME ON. COME ON? Can we just NOT FOR ONE GODDAMN DAY??? How in the living hell is it not September yet??

My oldest (9) has inherited the family anxiety that comes from both sides. It's manageable and not too bad, but we're millennials and we have therapists for everything, so of course we have a therapist for our kid.

We had two appointments with this lady and my daughter was pretty iffy about it and took a lot of work to get her to open up. Finally by the time of the third appointment she was totally fine with it and I was excited to start making progress. But the therapist just didn't log in. I looked at my messages and saw a message from one minute before the appointment time saying she was having technical difficulties and wanted to reschedule for the next day. Okay fine... Next day, I rearrange my whole schedule and log in. No therapist. I check the messages and she messaged me ten minutes before the appointment that she injured herself somehow and had to go to urgent care. So we reschedule for today (a week later). I check my messages beforehand and don't have any. Great! Therapist doesn't log in. I check messages and she messaged me one minute AFTER the appointment time asking if we can reschedule for tomorrow because she has vertigo.

I mean, she asked me if we COULD, she didn't cancel the appointment, but now I can't seem to get her to answer my messages.

And at this point it's like, okay, maybe this lady is on a streak of really bad luck, and I'm sympathetic. I'm not saying I expect her to show up to work with a sword in her neck or whatever tf happened to her. But I'm getting really frustrated having my schedule constantly clear for an appointment that never happens, and I feel like at least a couple of these messages could've been sent sooner than *the time of the appointment*.

What should I do here? My daughter JUST built a bit of rapport with this lady and she said she doesn't want to try a different person. But this one won't show up? I don't know.

My middle girl (7) is really into reading and watching videos about nature, animals, conservation and biology. She loves telling adults facts they didn't know. She's tested out in reading and science and I'm so proud of her.

This summer she's researching like half the day (playing the other). I do as much as I can to support her interests. Little bro (almost 6) has become drawn into this too, and I'm thrilled because he's starting kindergarten, so let's stuff that brain as full as we can yeah?

But... Bromos... Have any of you ever had a six and seven year old at the same time? Do you understand me? My plight?

THE TALKING.

The endless, infinite, neverending, interminable TALKING. Like how a shark will die if it stops swimming? (OMG I can already hear "NO MOM not all sharks die if they stop swimming! DID YOU KNOW many species can actively pump water over their gills while perfectly still!?")

Kids this age think they'll die if they stop TALKING.

AND THERE'S TWO OF THEM!

I want to purge the words "Did you know?" from every human language. My brain is so full of facts. I haven't had a complete thought all day. I'm starting to stay up too late because I'm so addicted to the ability to think and read and stuff.

And my mom was so mean and always told me she hated being around me and didn't want to talk to me (ever), and I'm constantly worried about making them feel like I'm not interested in them.

This is hard 😅😅☠️

My middle kid (7) is honestly my easiest most of the time. Just chill AF, always happy, just running around giving people hugs, her hobby is literally studying (reading educational textbooks and memorizing facts), she has a spotless school record and a million friends, just a sweet, smart, well behaved kid (and so effing cute I could eat her little cheeks om nom nom). I almost feel bad complaining about her.

Also important note: she is 11th percentile in height due to genetics (Dad is 5'4"), but the doctor is happy with her nourishment and she's an energetic kid.

But OMG WHY DOES IT TAKE HER SO LONG TO EAT!? Most school days, I'm sorry, she goes to school without breakfast, because we'd have to wake up at 5am for her to actually get around to it before school. I tell her she has to sit with her food until she's eaten a reasonable amount, but she's just kind of talking and ignoring it (even if it's a favorite food). She'll get up to go to the bathroom and I'll forget to enforce the table rule because I'm so busy. Or I'll have to give up and just start actually getting her ready for the day.

At least once a day, I hear "THE DOG TOOK MY FOOD". And no matter how many times this happens, I'm still confused for a moment. "What food?". BECAUSE I FED HER LIKE THREE HOURS AGO. And I'm sorry, why is she mad at the dog? Did she want that food? Could've fooled me!

There are times my oldest and youngest are already eating their next meal while middle kid hasn't even eaten her first.

I keep a wide variety of healthy snacks available (fruit in a bowl, meat cheese and yogurt in the lower shelf of the fridge, trail mix and granola bars in the pantry, pb&j kit in the breadbox) and she does eventually go graze on those.

Should I just stop trying to make her actual meals? Should I just raise a cheesy granola child and call it a win? I'm tired of spending money and slaving over a hot stove to curate a gourmet experience for my dog (who, btw, is allergic to everything and keeps puking all over my house!!!)

I'm in a bunch of great Pyrenees groups on FB because... I have a great Pyrenees. Just now there's this meme posted that's just stick figures. Sad looking stick dude on the left with two stick kids, caption: my coworker working to support his two children. On the right, happy, cool stick girl (you know she's cool because she has sunglasses) with a wad of cash in one hand, coffee in another, a shopping bag on her arm, some sports car in the background, and a great Pyrenees.

Like. Come on. It's just performative and "pick me".

You know what really pisses these people off? When I point out that I have kids AND money AND a dog and I can... Get coffee and buy clothes whenever I want???

IDK why this bugs me so much. I think it's because my sister went full on vocal-childfree-antinatalist-"crotch goblins"-dog mom the second I had a kid. She'd had kids' names picked out and a wedding pinterest and then... Gone. All of a sudden it was "I don't need a man" and "dog moms are real moms" and "I'm a working mom" oh God 🤦🏼‍♀️

She's a lot better with this nowadays, but I can't help it, whenever I see things like this I'm just like... Omg can you please stop being so blatantly insecure???

We had nothing on today and the smoke is getting kind of bad, so I figured we would just run up to the farmer's market for lunch and groceries and then head back home. Super chill day, right? Well, a bit of a squeeze because the market opens at noon and my oldest's therapy appointment was at 1, and if you get to the market at 2 or later it's slimmer pickings. But okay, we just squeezed it in at 12 sharp.

As I'm waiting in a huge produce line, my middle girl said she found a red chili pepper "growing wild in the grass" next to the stand. I said no, those don't grow here, especially not randomly in parking lots. It probably belongs to the stand, so put it back because it's stealing and also those can burn. Cue a ton of back and forth, no, totally, it really was growing wild in the parking lot! NO, PUT IT BACK. But it iiiiiiis growing wild here I found it on the ground!! PUT. IT. BACK. Ugh.

I bought my produce and went to pick up the various lunch items I'd ordered, at which point she starts screaming that the smoke is burning her eyes and nose and throat. Okay listen, it's not THAT bad out and she had been outside for all of 20 minutes, and she's not a particularly sensitive group. Then my oldest told me she saw her snapping the pepper open and smelling and licking it. GIRL!!! WHAT!!!!!! Omfg. Clearly at some point she also rubbed her eyes with her freaking pepper-hands.

Believe it or not, this girl is a GREAT listener. Like, possibly my best listener of the three. So so beautifully well-behaved damn near 100% of the time. So I don't know WTAF happened here, I assume her brain got a virus and blue screened for a minute, idk.

So we rush back to the car, completely forgetting my husband's lunch (I'm sorry!) and pull out to the drive in that has a public restroom so we can rinse her face with water and mild soap. It's slowly but surely starting to help. At this point it's a RACE to get home in time for this appointment so hubs can keep an eye on her, idk what the plan even was... We got home with six minutes to run her a bath, confiscate all her clothes, lay out new ones, get her an ice pack and distribute lunches.

Oldest and I get down to her room one minute late and log in to zoom. Seven minutes go by. I check my email and find out that she cancelled at the last minute for the second day in a row. It's not even really her fault, yesterday her computer broke and today apparently she hurt herself and had to go to urgent care, but GOD I'm already really sick of scheduling my days around this appointment for no reason. We missed out on a fun outing with our friends because of this appointment.

Anyway, middle girl is okay now, but I'm not gonna make it to September you guys. I'm just not gonna make it. I feel like my ghost left my body weeks ago 😅 Why is it so fucking impossible to just have a nice, relaxing day!?!?

And now I'm sitting here feeling like shit for lecturing the poor kid in public during the whole crazy meltdown... BUT WTF WAS THAT!?!

Husband and I tried to resuscitate our sex life last night for the first time in almost a month. Kids were in bed, we set up a bunch of blankets and stuff on the floor to avoid making noise, we were SUPER quiet (lame), and all three kids rotated shifts coming to our door over ridiculous crap. Mom I have a weird injury! (There was a slight indent on her arm from manhandling the plastic rings on the Gatorade). Mom W keeps licking an apple! (Was it his apple? Oh, it was? Wtf kid I don't give a crap???). Just a bunch of silly things. Nighttime boundaries have always been a huge issue. They just basically act like they never heard me talk about it with them.

So naturally this poor guy can't keep it up, because the sounds of children's voices slay that thing like a dragon (which I guess is better than the alternative). It's just taking FOREVER. The floor hurts. We're exhausted. Just can't seem to get it done. My nighttime routine of watching TV-14+ content and playing Zelda is slipping away before my eyes, and I look forward to that all day. Two hours and five interruptions in, he just had to give up. I felt bad (I got off three times because I always do, but anyway...). It just felt like such an epic failure.

This morning when I'm trying to discuss boundaries with my kids, my oldest tells me she totally knew what was going on because she can hear everything through the floor. Omg. Seriously??? SERIOUSLY? I'm glad she was completely unbothered by it, but A) we were so quiet!! and B) THEN WHY DID SHE KEEP BOTHERING US???

I just miss privacy so much. Not just for getting it on, but I just really miss having no pressure on me for some amount of time each day. Just doing my crafts in front of my murder shows knowing no one is going to need anything from me for *hours*.

My mom, the one person I trusted to take my kids, can't anymore because... Drumroll please... She was just diagnosed with CANCER 🎉

Which is to say, I don't care that she can't take my kids, I care that she has fucking cancer, I'm just saying fuck it all. I'm tired of living in a glass box with six little eyes and ears constantly glued to me demanding more attention.

I gained a bunch of unexplained weight the past year and a half despite my lifestyle not really changing at all. I tried harder and harder until I was barely eating, never stopped moving, and was dizzy all the time.

A month ago I went to the doctor and found out I have hypothyroidism.

So they gave me a prescription for that as well as Zepbound to help reverse some of the damage that's been done.

I stopped weighing myself some time ago because it's trash for my mental health, but today I had my one month follow-up for the zepbound (thyroid med follow-up is a few weeks away). I asked them to just tell me if I lost weight, yes or no. And I've lost 13 pounds! 🤯 For a second I was like, uh oh, am I in trouble? But the doctor was thrilled so that's nice =)

So if you've been waiting for your sign (I was), I'm just saying this stuff is freaking amazing.

Anyone else feel their perception of time just melting? It hasn't been THAT hard of a month, but it's been a mixed bag, and moreover just *so busy*. Since the first, we've been to nine birthday parties (it was also my birthday, but there was no party lol), went on a trip, did the 4th parade/cookout/fireworks show, my youngest went to farm camp, my oldest went to rock climbing camp, my mom was diagnosed with leukemia and hospitalized for a full week and now is being quarantined at home, my sister's dogs got married (I just felt like I had to throw that in there, and yes we were in attendance), I crashed out and got diagnosed with hypothyroidism, my kid rage quit general gymnastics classes and ended up falling in love with tumbling, roughly 10 weekdays were filled with playdates, and ironically, we haven't actually been able to do anything unstructured since school was in session.

Isn't that like, a year's worth of stuff? I keep looking at the calendar and going... Really!?! I haven't felt this trapped inside a month since March 2020.

There's a play place in my neighborhood that's chronically understaffed. I took my youngest (5) out for some special one on one time today to the cool laid-back mall up the street. We got his hair cut at the kids salon, and then we went to the play place. It's not unusual for there to be no one at the front desk, no bell, and no sign. But there were kids playing inside and we waited for 15 minutes. He was so patient, which just made me feel bad for him. Finally, I told him to go ahead and I would wait.

Finally an employee showed up, and she was kind of snappy about how that's not allowed. Ugh. I sheepishly said we'd just been waiting a long time and didn't know if anyone was there. She said "question: what would you define as *a long time*?", kind of like she was saying it wasn't that long and I was just full of it.

So now I feel like crap. Sitting here in the back of the play place dreading the checkout process. I guess I do feel like fifteen minutes with no sign, no bell, and no visible employee presence at all is a long time for a business that's open, but I also just kind of knowingly broke a rule and clearly offended the girl working here, and I just... 🤦🏼‍♀️

Pep talk me so I can leave and don't have to live in the back of the play place forever??

I had maintained a decent weight for several years, but about two-ish years ago it just started piling on despite there being no lifestyle change. I ate less and less, exercised more and more, and the very best I could do was not *gain* any weight, and even just maintenance was so much work and deprivation that I would eventually crash out and start eating like half a normal person again. Recently I went to the doctor to inquire about GLP-1s and she found a flagged blood panel from a year ago where my TSH was more than double out of range. She said the lab should've called me or at least put the result on my patient portal (🙄 remind me to write an autobiography about all the times doctors dropped the ball in my life). We did another blood draw, and it was slightly better, but I was still diagnosed with hypothyroidism.

So now I'm on both Zepbound and thyroid meds. I'm feeling pretty hopeful, but just curious if anyone here has treated hypothyroidism and if it made a significant impact on their ability to stay in shape. I'm still not convinced I'm not just getting freaking old.

Warning: I'm trying really hard not to be ableist here. But NO ONE cares what my side of this is because he's the one with the diagnoses. And it's just ERUPTING out of me tonight.

He's SUCH A GODDAMN LITTLE BABY. Just such a fucking baby. He's just SUCH. A. BABY. Even the simplest little life tasks are 😭😭😭 soooo haaaaard 😭😭😭 It's not even halfway through fucking summer vacation and I'm completely burnt to a crisp. My brain has evolved to retreat into a rock hard shell when it hears whining noises. The word "MOMMM!!!" is basically a kill switch that sets off all the lockdown procedures.

Today was pretty hard because they were just complaining about everything and wouldn't let me finish a single sentence. I took them out back because a cookout and pool/splash pad time squeezes out hours of entertainment. It was already after work hours and I kept trying to get him to come outside and be part of it.

It's a familiar pattern.

"Please be part of the family fun. No? Okay, then please help me because I'm overwhelmed. No? Oh..."

He said he needed a "break" (he hadn't done anything) and went inside for 20 minutes. Turn he came back out, roasted himself a hot dog, and went back inside without saying anything. Finally he showed up again, and I asked him if he could just move the hose from the pool to the splash pad (30 seconds). He immediately started going back inside and said "No, I need a break". I said he hasn't actually not been on break this entire time and I really just needed one little thing. He literally ran out the front door. RAN. Like, full meltdown. Gone.

He showed back up again ten minutes later, but... I don't want to talk to him. I don't want to hear all about how hard every single little thing in life is for him, AGAIN. I'm so tired of hearing it. I'm just so fucking tired. I didn't know he had this stuff when we got married. He wasn't diagnosed until his late 30s. I knew he was difficult but I didn't really go in knowing all the information. Also, I will die on this hill: HE IS MILKING IT. He's fucking using this shit to get away with having his way at all times.

I'm so royally pissed off right now. Fuck it fuck it fuck it. I'm tired of hearing that he's just so special and needs so much help with fucking everything and can never be trusted to act like an adult. If he's really, truly such a goddamn precious snowflake who can barely adult his way out of a paper bag, I don't want to be in this marriage. I feel like I should get to say that.

Relevant info addition: he was wealthy growing up, he is slightly overweight but not noticably, used to have absurd eating habits but got pre-diabetes/hypertension and stopped.

So my husband kind of believes in "free feeding" the kids. If they want food they get it. Barely matters at all what is, fully doesn't matter when they last ate and how much. Of course that's what you do with babies, but our kids are now 5, 7, and 9, and I swear they just find something they like and binge like freaking crazy until it's all gone and there's a 50/50 chance of a tummy ache.

My nine year old is equal parts sporty and couch potato, but sometimes the things she wants to eat seem absurd to me. Somehow she talked her dad into letting her get a deluxe cheeseburger, a regular cheeseburger, AND an ice cream sundae every time we go to the drive in up the street (at least once weekly because it's our gymnastics night tradition). He'll make two pizzas because "she's going to eat a whole one herself". She wants thirds and fourths on everything. I've always felt like they get too many chicken nuggets and corn dogs and stuff.

This never really showed until recently. I feel like she's beginning to be a little more heavy set than her classmates. No big deal, I'll just take them out swimming more because they love it and make more conscious decisions about their meals, right? Well, my husband says we shouldn't do that. He says it's perfectly healthy at her age to eat this much and that she's just filling out (I really don't think that's what it is, but idk, he could be right). He thinks if we make any changes to her diet, she'll notice and feel bad.

IDK it just feels like people can't just eat 2.5 cheeseburgers and an ice cream sundae all at once forever? Isn't there some point where we should be teaching them things like, hey if you're done with this unhealthy food and you're still hungry, here's some peanut butter celery? Not "here have another cheeseburger"?

But how on earth DO you broach the topic with a preteen girl, especially if your spouse disagrees?

It was just so crappy. Yesterday morning I was wrecked because the kids were up asking me for attention until the middle of the night, and then they woke up really early. I had to drive the whole way home from our trip because he doesn't drive after waaay too many accidents (he really hurt someone last time). The breakfast we ordered never came. The place we drove to 40 minutes away wasn't allowed to have people sit down inside because they had a pending occupancy license (?). Such hungry, grumpy kids (understandably). Then two more hours driving home so I could finish all the gifts for my middle girl whose birthday is the day after mine. I was crazily wrapping gifts and working on her giant crochet orca when I finally decided to take a break. I got a bottle of water and got in the hammock outside, looked at my phone, and my mom was in the middle of texting.

"Um. My hematologist just called. I have leukemia."

I felt like I'd been punched in the gut and just went into a daze, focusing on the orca (crochet is an excellent dissociation activity). My husband, who I had told immediately (and who usually isn't THIS big of an asshole) was grousing about how we need to clean out the fridge because we're getting a new one. He's never cleaned out the fridge before, so I asked if he could do it since I was just feeling very overwhelmed by the news and everything I had to do. He said okay, but immediately started angrily complaining about how disorganized it is and how there's some expired food in there. "Why do you do it this way!?". Well, like I've been saying for years, I'm overwhelmed and can't perfectly handle every single household task plus 90% of the parenting, so I half ass a lot of things. Picture putting away groceries knowing if you walk away before finishing the dog will get them. Then three kids scream "MOM!" from different directions. Of course I cram everything in and run like hell.

He just kept bitching and whining like A) it was so unfair to make him do this one time and B) everything I've been doing all by myself while begging for help has been done "wrong". I finally just burst into tears because I was so overwhelmed and so angry that he wouldn't give me a break from all the demands even though it was my birthday, I JUST found out my mom had cancer, AND all I was even trying to do was make birthday magic happen for our kid. When I finally finished the orca, I gave it to her early, and she immediately pointed out something I did wrong.

We had a big long talk last night where I made it clear I've been completely done with his whiny teenager shit for years and I will not forget how he treated me like his leisure mattered more than my family crisis/birthday. He seemed really ashamed of himself. Great.

I tossed and turned until 4am. I haven't had insomnia this bad since high school, and I have like, genetic insomnia. I just kept thinking about my mom, about how she might waste away and die, about how little my family seems to care about my needs while expecting me to jump a thousand times a day, about what a rigorous day I was about to face on two days of barely any sleep.

Now it's middle girl's birthday and I can barely respond to anything she says. This afternoon is a close friend's son's birthday party as well. And then a late karaoke night with my friends specifically for my birthday and another friend's, which I REALLY want to go to because it'll be such a nice do over. My friends like me because I do art and light up around children and can sing, these are things I like about being me. They don't like me because I'm so good at doing whatever they want all day long.

But when do I sleep? I can barely keep my eyes open. I'm so frustrated.

OMG! She had a bone marrow biopsy a couple days ago because she's been feeling crappy and has been dealing with some anemia. She was scared and I told her it was probably just the doctor covering their ass. I thought she said something about not having results for a few weeks. Then just now she texts us that the hematologist called.

I feel like I've been kicked in the gut. Omg. I can't believe this.

First world problems. We're on a lovely beach cabin getaway on a peaceful inlet. Yesterday the kids and I swam for hours. Now I have swimmer's itch all up and down my legs and it's so uncomfortable to walk I'm about to go through the ceiling. Also my knees are just shot from chasing down the kids' floaties over and over (bit of a current here at high tide - about the sixth time they lost them, I just gave up and let them go). Also I'm burnt to a crisp.

Last night around 10pm, my six year old came to cry about how her hair "smells like ocean". I was like yeah you were the one pitching a fit because you didn't want a bath 🤦🏼‍♀️ Then at 10:30, my five year old woke up and started stampeding around the living room yelling "VROOOOOOOMMMM!!!". I kicked his butt back to bed. Then at 11, my nine year old came to tell me she couldn't sleep because she felt sOoOoOoOoOo bad for losing the floaties. I told her the floaties were $6.99, but having peace and quiet at some point (ANY POINT, PLEASE) in the night is priceless. It was about 11:30 when I talked her down enough to go to bed. Then at midnight I had to pee... Bathroom's in the hall so unfortunately I woke up the five year old again. I finally got to sleep at about 12:45.

Then they were all up and at 'em at 6am. I didn't even remember it was my birthday until 6 told me it was 😅

Which only set me to flailing harder, because if today is my birthday, that means tomorrow is HER birthday... The trip distracted me. I haven't wrapped her presents. I'm REALLY CLOSE to finishing her giant crochet orca but I'm not done. My fool ass said I would make her a cake from scratch!!!

We check out at 11 and then it's a three hour trip home. WHEN DO I DO ALL THIS STUFF?? And when I do, will it just be total endless suffering because apparently marine parasites burrowed into my ass and died!?!?

Help me 🫠