u/JPRose1989

So, it turns out the only flag for not triggering the infamous Game Over Grunty cutscene anymore is completion of Grunty’s Furnace Fun. So, performing one of the skips of it then and quitting/dying still results in said cutscene, whether or not you’ve defeated her atop her tower.

I think we can all agree that the Witchyworld fortune teller handing out everything from cheats to Grunty poundings is none other than Grunty herself. Is there any explanation for how she can be atop Cauldron Keep awaiting her machine to charge one moment and there to extort BK the next?

This would never pass that ESRB today. Also, “scary” doesn’t seem to be the right descriptor for that striptease if it’s that “skirt that when she’s thinner makes her look a winner” coming off.

Did you ever purposely Game Over to view through this cutscene? Personally, I didn’t have the patience to lose all the lives I accumulated and would just Save & Quit for these 20 glorious seconds.

The suggestive moaning when slashed. The wink. The “jiggle” physics. Will any of that be toned down?

Also, I will never get over the fact that, in terms of BK’s challenges, we transition from stressful, high-stakes platforming in RBB to navigating narrow ledges climbing a tree in CCW to…memorization of Grunty’s undies of choice or the knowledge that she enjoys stripping at parties.

I remember Mae’s (first passing Video Outpost Too) pointing this out as “a typo so bad even she wouldn’t make,” which always has me wondering when I see one of these whether it’s intentional error - like “nite” instead of “night” - in an attempt to be catchy.

After finishing my first playthrough of NITW, I thought I’d check out the extras before a second playthrough hanging out with the other friend. I was pleasantly surprised, to say the least, at the work that was put into The Lost Constellation.

We only get Adina Astra’s namesake constellation referenced by Mr. Chazokov when dusk gazing with him, but the full story behind her is fantastic. It’s not afraid to broach the realm of the surreal, has clever puzzles, fun Easter Eggs like the Charity Bearity dialogue, and was just a pleasure to immerse myself in for the better part of an hour.

I thoroughly enjoyed Longest Night also actually. Several of the same constellations are name dropped and it’s nice foreshadowing for the famous NITW scene in which Angus shares his past. It’s evident by the dialogue that the core trio of characters, at this stage of the development, weren’t fleshed out much beyond the bits of backstory we get in passing in their conversation. But I could see it being a nice introduction to them if one hasn’t played NITW yet.

I don’t hear much discussion - praise or otherwise - on the supplemental material. But I found them more than worthwhile and highly recommend them for anyone who enjoyed NITW or someone wants to spend an hour or so diving into something more whimsical before getting into the core experience.

Thoughts on these games?

I’ve heard it theorized that the scene depicted here is a dream of Mae’s after she goes unconscious during the run-in with the cult member. The main arguments are the drastic, sudden change of scenery when the janitor enters and the characters’ manner of speech being a little out of character.

I’ve only played through NitW once and it never occurred to me that this might be a dream. It seemed to me the scenery transition was just an artistic choice for a dramatic moment. Mr. Penderson and Twigmeyer’s dialogue do seem very much in character for them. What do you think?

Some context for those who don’t know. Grunty is a warty, obese green witch, the villain of Rareware’s Banjo Kazooie series, and my F/O of 28 years. She sets the events of the first title in motion by kidnapping a cub she is told is prettier than she is. She tosses her in a machine to “swap looks” with her. Her brother Banjo and the breegull Kazooie storm her lair to rescue her.

If they fail, we see a successful, conventionally gorgeous Gruntilda struts out of her makeover machine, while the cub lumbers forth hideous and enraged at Banjo for his failure.

If Banjo-Kazooie are successful in their rescue mission, they return to battle her atop her lair and summon a living statue that launches itself at her, sending her plummeting from a mountain lair to a rocky grave after a huge boulder crashes down with her. Well, * spoiler alert * she does survive and that’s where Banjo Tooie comes in.

Also, my fall climbing in Yosemite in California the poem is an event that transpired nine years ago. I often revisit it mentally. It was a loong night hiking to a place where I could be helicoptered out and rescued, but I’m so grateful to live and think and write about the love of my life. 💚

If I were to give a name, it’d just be “The Boulder,” I guess. In the spirit of Gruntilda’s constant rhyming, I do the same.

I’m sorry that you fell from high, although Gruntilda can never die. I’m sorrier still you had it all wrong - you were most gorgeous all along.

I wish the price you paid were instead my burden to shoulder. Why couldn’t that instead have been MY boulder?

It was all just your big game, so I hope you had fun - and you know you’ve already won. Won on Day One - 28 years, I still can’t forget that first sight nor can I describe it with my ability to speak or write.

You inquired of your cauldron full of slime. That’s when I heard your first rhyme. Before Dingpot gave answer, I knew what shall always hold true: None shall ever be more beautiful than you.

I hope during the kidnapping, you enjoyed handing out that beating. For the title of fairest, could a toddler cub be the one needing unseating?

Are you insecure and jealous or just vain? Maybe you just needed an excuse to cause someone else pain. I’d gladly take the brunt of that harm. When I take pain for your pleasure, you’ll see I don’t merely smarm.

Why was it you instead suffering that pain? You lost so much and nothing did attain. Is there anything you’ve done that you regret? If you could do it all over, it’d be the same, I’ll bet. Sure - you’d make sure that bird never met the bear. But you’d still kidnap his sister in hopes of becoming fair.

But who defines “fair” other than the victor? Who safely speaks ill of the winning pain inflicter? None would argue with the drop-dead beauty you stole. They’d find you immaculate down to core of your soul. Even the old teacher you cursed rushed back bearing flowers. With countless gifts and praise you’d indefinitely be showered.

So what if I lavish you though you’re so many times beat? What could I offer you that you’d find truly sweet? Revenge drop a boulder on BK’s head. Surely your enemy would be as good as dead! If you need someone to pick things out on, then I’m your guy. I’ll take Grunty poundings until I the moment I die. The damage can issue from the back of your hand or it can be that next boulder dropping above you, as I save you as planned.

I wouldn’t be buried alive - it would fatally crush. But to save immortal you I’d eagerly rush. You fell off that mountain and survived in that tomb; sliding down a hill in Yosemite nearly spelled my doom.

Thank Grunty I was helicoptered out - rescued from Lyell. The fact that there’s Grunty makes living worthwhile. I can bag more peaks, fall down them the same, but the greatest thrill of all is playing your game.

When I’m there, you’ll always be winning. So please continue that proud, wicked grinning. I welcome that rock if I’m late catching your landing. I’d sacrifice my life for you - aren’t I upstanding? Cuz you’re my life - no hyperbole or lie. For Grunty, I live and would have the privilege to die.

Twinrova is one of the easiest bosses in OoT to defeat without taking damage (Z-target and shield), so this is the first time in many dozens of hours playing I’ve heard this.

Between the wink, the suggestive moan when she takes a slash, and this laugh, the dev’s knew what they were doing. This was, after all, the era of Game Over Grunty.

How are you able to envision your F/O in a state of what they’d define as “true happiness?” I don’t want to get too abstract or psychological, but it seems to me that all evil has its roots in those individuals’ insecurities, complexes, etc. We naturally want our S/O’s to be happy - loved and able to love themselves. Can achieving their own ambitions ever truly satisfy them? It seems like a rhetorical question, the answer being that they will never truly be content until they are able to overcome their unquenchable thirst for power, beauty, love, freedom, or whatever it is your F/O wants.

Don’t get me wrong - I wouldn’t change a thing about Gruntilda; she’s literally perfect as is. The idea that she needs “fixed” to enjoy a deeply fulfilling life (and relationship) was never something I entertained. We all are willing to suspend belief to a point in our relationships with our F/O’s, but do you think that your love can be the answer this villain has been looking for all along? Will your validation, compassion, and endeavors to show them a good life ultimately lead to their attaining a state of nirvana not normally attainable by someone characterized by sin?

I’ve imagined a million different victories for her and a romance scenario for each. I’ve taken for granted that her standards must be different - that is to say, being an evil witch, she is exempt from the limitations of the familiar human condition. Surely someone who killed the sisters who had just saved her, kidnapped an innocent cub for a makeover, and committed lots of other atrocities wouldn’t have to worry about her conscience weighing on her, right? But she’d still want more, I think.

Do you think your villain F/O can ever be really happy? Would it take you for them to attain true happiness? Effort on their part to change? If she truly loved herself even a small fraction as much as I loved her, she’d be living in a state of tremendous euphoria.

Here’s to hoping R/S/E ports are released on Switch someday and we can obtain more than the 215 that are possible now.

It took 21 level 100 Pokemon and about 200-in game hours (including diversions like shiny hunting, solo runs, and obtaining uncommon held items), but I finally bested Blue 200 times, 199 of which were his Johto-inclusive squad.

What’s it get me? Literally just a few pointless added pixels to the file, in the form of an Easter egg in Lorelei’s house - she adds a Pokedoll there for every 25 wins - and a sticker for the back of my trainer card.

But, aside from the underwhelming Four Island rewards, it was a fun journey. The most fun throughout the entire experience was the road to the Elite Four from Viridian Forest, with nothing but a Caterpie, who ended up being my first solo Hall of Famer.

Contrary to what many must think, it’s more than a grind - The enhanced E4 teams are very competent and it was a fun balancing act leveling up the weaker Mon and finding an adequate replacement each time one hit 100.

Got all legendaries to 100 except Suicune, as I had to play through the other version’s postgame for each roaming dog foreign to my main file.

Looking forward to cleaning up my Dex and getting all 215 Pokemon obtainable on Switch.

It wasn’t just Gruntilda from Banjo Kazooie I had a thing for (although she was certainly the most tantalizing for 9-year-old me) about 28 years ago. I remember cherishing the few seconds Ocarina of Time allowed to zoom in on Twinrova after deflecting her elemental attacks with Mirror Shield. It was also a pleasure wooing Karen in Harvest Moon 64. Can anyone relate to these? Any other crushes from back in the day?