u/Ok_mountain352

Does a place of eternal suffering for humans finite lives really exist? Or is the portrayed idea just a tool to control people? Im hoping it doesn't exist.

I just watched something horrible. I knew it was horrible to watch but I did it anyway. I always let myself down and those close to me. I would be hated if the people who I see or speak to regularly knew what I watch. I really wish I didn't exist sometimes.

Like I dont really feel like I'm living. Just going through the motions. I wake up (pretty late), go to college, come back home. Work stacks up. I get this overwhelming sense of dread at times. Mostly though I don't really feel anything. I've faced traumatic situations and likely have autism which probably adds to this. Even still though I mainly do what I need to out of this base desire to survive. It kinda sucks. Worse part is that most people in the world have it worse objectively even with my health issues. It's just kind of tiring at times.

I've been diagnosed with ADHD and I possibly have autism as well. I struggle to articulate myself in conversations with people which leads to them asking to repeat myself.

I also struggle with projecting my voice a lot in group conversations. I have a lot of social anxiety as well and wonder if that contributes to it. I've had this issue for a long time since I was a teenager at least. It's quite frustrating.

Feel like im trapped in limbo or something.

I mean I have stuff to be grateful for especially compared to some other people but I still feel empty.

Like I'm swimming in murky water just going through the motions.

I dont feel my parents can help me. With my therapist I dont see any progress in myself with the many sessions we've probaby my fault.

My fridge smells terrible because of a mistake I made. I dont enjoy class anymore and have to drag myself to college.

I've been addicted to graphic content for ages. I was going to go to an EMDR therapist but I never got round to a proper session. I'm bipolar with ADHD and very likely autism.

I struggle with boundaries and goals. My mental health continues to deteriorate.

I'm starting to realize I'm just stuck like this.

I wish I didn't have to deal with any of this anymore.

I have a sinking feeling in my stomach and I feel intensely anxious about going to college today. I also feel angedonia like I can't enjoy anything. I dont know what to do.

I'm a 22m now. I have trauma from all throughout school. I even took time off after a while. I still struggle connecting with people and probably seem distant to my friends. I also have ADHD and probably autism which adds another challenge. Also food allergies on top of that. I don't why I had to be like this or experience life this way. I feel so alone nowadays and the pressures of my life are eating away at me. Its gotten worse over the years.

I'm a 22m who as allergies to dairy, egg and nuts (that I know of) I also have alopecia and asthma. Also ADHD and likely autism. I feel very unlucky and wonder whats the point of even trying sometimes when I feel like a genetic failure.

I dont know why I had to be born this way.

Been kinda down lately. I enjoy Manga, anime, drawing and watching shows.

Fan of pokemon been playing it on my 3DS lately.

Open to chat to anybody as long as they're open to being friendly.

Currently I'm in 2nd year of college. Last semester I was learning C# and concepts like Object Oriented Programming and towards the end used wpf forms.

I started relying heavily on AI at the end of the semester which Im not proud of.

At the end of the semester when holidays began I was burnt out and didnt practice much for going back. Im unsure on how to approach learning the concepts I need going back.

Currently I feel like Im just going with flow without gaining the skils I need. I did have the idea of try make a console app which can emulate Pokémon with OOP concepts but I havent gotten far.

Im pretty lost atm and wonder if getting a tutor would help.

(Disclaimer: kind of depressing)

Currently I'm a 22 year old male who's a kissless virgin. Ive had times in the past when Ive talked to girls and been friends with them but never got a point where I kissed or went further. Im likely autistic on top of having ADHD. I can't even blame anyone but myself because there's times where girls seemed interested possibly or maybe not but Ive never made an active approach to take things further. Even recently this girl I havent talked to for over a month seemed interested after breaking up with her boyfriend but then I had a bit of a mental breakdown and stopped talking to her and she ended up kissing another guy. Im really only here for my friends and family at this point.

Probably pointless even posting on here. Last comment I got was an unhelpful remark about not using AI. I have this constant sinking feeling in my chest. I dont want to be like this. I feel pretty hopeless at the moment and it doesn't help I missed a medication dose.