u/PomeloResponsible791

I still don’t completely NOT believe in the loa but ! I feel like every time I like someone and they give me some mixed signals or signs of disinterest, I take it as a challenge or it just discourages me, motivates me, discourages me, motivates me. Leaving me in this constant state of highs and lows, anxiety, taking me away from myself.
Believing that if someone doesn’t want me that I can fix them or make them more into me.
Well looking back, I have never ever manifested anyone that was already interested in me.
Whenever they like me or love me or make it clear that they want to commit to me, I get bored. I still feel loved, safe, happy but it feels like okay, what’s next?
And the thing is these people that I want SO SO SO desperately aren’t even that attractive or better than me or more interesting or even anything in particular.
I become crazy pyscho stalker obsessed to the point where it’s unhealthy for my brain.
Making fake pages, not giving up when blocked etc, trying to post for their attention, doing witchcraft, finding EVERYTHING about them, making it super obvious that I like them, checking their page and following every TEN SECONDS, just doing shit I shouldn’t be doing
When I hyperfixate on a person, they are all I can think about, from morning til night, I can’t sleep bc I’m thinking of them,
And most of the time, I don’t even know these people or if I do, I’m not even close to them, or if I am close to them, I’m still not as close as I would want to be.
Why is that?
My self concept is “good”, I know I’m attractive I have eyes, I could go on a dating app right now and get free validation from anyone but then if someone doesn’t give me that validation. My brain goes “wait what’s going on??? I need to do something abt this” and my body just gets anxiety, and tries every technique under the sun to feel some sense of control.
My ego CANNOT take rejection and if you were my sp, you would be like what the fuck is she doing.
Even I don’t understand it.
I fall into obsession so easily and I don’t know why.
I have things I could be doing but I focus sp.
My self respect with people who openly desire me is like so high I could cut them off like that but when people don’t want me my self respect goes straight out the window. WHY IS THAT.
When they’re not even that HOT OR COOL OR WHATEVER JUST DIRTY, WEIRD PEOPLE
WHY IS THAT
I’m literally crashing out over this I can’t.
I literally have a sweet loving bf as well and I have been fixated on these other types of people for NO reason.
And this is not just a few days, these feelings of mine last for years or months, they go away then come back stronger,
And I don’t know why.
After a while I am able to let go of these types of people but it takes a long time for me.
I literally have to force myself to detach sometimes or else I literally cannot stay away from that person no matter if they push me away or not.
Please someone give me some advice.
I js unfollowed my sp cause I couldn’t stop checking the page and losing sleep over it for almost 2 weeks. I just cannot deal with these obsessive thoughts
Literally what tf is going on
This is seriously affecting me mentally and physically draining me.
Not being able to get what I want is so soul crushing to me, it literally destroys me and I need help and don’t know what to do at all

I’m searching for a vanilla perfume that is sickeningly sweet, think pancakes, cupcakes, cakes, cookies, waffles,
Something like that.
Idc if it’s immature or basic and no deeper notes like almond, fruity or florals or anything like that I want something straight up basic sugary sweet vanilla but that projects a lot, has longevity and actually smells delicious.

Is this actually impossible to find something that fits every box ?

Edit: thank u all for the recommendations 😭💗

I’m in a 2 year monogamous relationship.
But I feel attracted, can have multiple crushes, want to/have sex with other people, basically can’t stay loyal to anyone I’ve ever dated,
My partner caught me multiple times and decided to stay, he cheated multiple times as well and I stayed.
But I still feel jealousy, emotional pain, have trust issues, I cry and yell and check phones, play victim, act extremely loyal, make arguments over/ accuse him of talking with other women, even tho I am just projecting and doing the same.
He wants to be monogamous and is also the same with the jealousy towards me and is even more controlling, overprotective and hates when other men look at me, talk to me etc.
So why is this?
(I know this is toxic and weird)
This just proves monogamy to me is not natural and the cheating rates prove it.
But then why do I feel jealousy and and want THEM to be loyal to only ME? (But only with my boyfriend idc what the other people i like/am sexually attracted to/involved with are doing)
If I didn’t feel that way I would suggest open relationships but I don’t think he would take it well since he’s always talking about that if I cheat, we would be done. But he keeps catching me microcheating/cheating and doesn’t leave.
I still very much love him and see a future with him and only him.
But I can’t help to feel attracted to other people and be open to having fwb or side things etc.
And he’s the same way with his lust issues and past cheating and he wrote on dating apps that he was looking for also something on the side (even tho I was feeling the same I felt insecure and incredibly hurt by this)
But we love eachother and want to stay together for some reason.
Wtf does this mean

I’m in a 2 year monogamous relationship.
But I feel attracted, can have multiple crushes, want to/have sex with other people, basically can’t stay loyal to anyone I’ve ever dated,
My partner caught me multiple times and decided to stay, he cheated multiple times as well and I stayed.
But I still feel jealousy, emotional pain, have trust issues, I cry and yell and check phones, play victim, act extremely loyal, make arguments over/ accuse him of talking with other women, even tho I am just projecting and doing the same.
He wants to be monogamous and is also the same with the jealousy towards me and is even more controlling, overprotective and hates when other men look at me, talk to me etc.
So why is this?
(I know this is toxic and weird)
This just proves monogamy to me is not natural and the cheating rates prove it.
But then why do I feel jealousy and and want THEM to be loyal to only ME?
If I didn’t feel that way I would suggest open relationships but I don’t think he would take it well since he’s always talking about that if I cheat, we would be done. But he keeps catching me microcheating/cheating and doesn’t leave.
I still very much love him and see a future with him and only him.
But I can’t help to feel attracted to other people and be open to having fwb or side things etc.
And he’s the same way with his lust issues and past cheating and he wrote on dating apps that he was looking for also something on the side (even tho I was feeling the same I felt insecure and incredibly hurt by this)
But we love eachother and want to stay together for some reason.
Wtf does this mean

I want to start dropshipping but my problem is I have no money for ads since I don’t have a job yet and I’m seeing people are putting 100 a day or more on ads.
How much do you realistically need to invest money wise to start getting sales?
So I can be prepared.
I hope this is not a dumb question.

I want to start to get into wearing corsets
What’s the cheapest beginner friendly least noticeable under clothes corset that actually shows results?? Thank u :3

I want to start to get into wearing corsets
What’s the cheapest beginner friendly least noticeable under clothes corset that actually shows results?? Thank u :3

What does it mean when a man never compliments you but keeps the conversations going for hours, genuinely interested in talking to you, shares deep stuff, builds a great connection with me.
Made it clear he's sexually very attracted to me and sends me pictures of him, his body, I know almost everything abt him, sends pics of his day etc, trying to make me laugh so it's clear he trusts me and is often trying to impress me with his looks and other stuff.
BUT when I send a pic of myself looking good asf or post a story of myself, he just ignores it or even says ☠️ or insults me “as a joke” but then continues to yap to me so much and compliments other women to me which annoys me a bit not cuz I like him but cuz my ego ig.
He notices it gets awkward and purposely friendzones me when I’m not even in love with him or anything
The most he ever said about my looks is that I’m not chopped once a long time ago but that’s not good enough for me
Fyi, I would rate myself an attractive girl and he obviously likes me in some way so that's why I’m a bit confused.
But other men and women constantly compliment me on my looks
Should I just not over think so much?

This is a strictly online friends/penpal situation for 3 years straight.
In the beginning we had feelings for eachother but then stopped.
For 3 years straight we are just texting day and night staying up til 5 am just talking, laughing for hours and hours and just can’t stop talking to eachother. He sends me pics of himself, of his body, videos of his day, of literally everything and every angle. And I’m thinking he does it to show off or catch my attention.
We talk and send sexual things sometimes too (its bad i know) so its clear he is physically attracted to me since if he wasn’t interested in talking to me, he would just let it fissle out but I think it’s clear we enjoy it even tho it’s unsaid.
SO, thing is, he compliments EVERY GIRL in front of me, his exes, abt his girlfriend, everyone except me. I send him a pretty pic myself, he js ignores it wtf or just straight up insults me as a joke on purpose instead of a compliment
This just pisses me off
But then says things like so would u date *his race* I said depends on the person. He said “Lmao me” basically asking would I date him(?) I just ignored it☠️
Or if I say “my man can’t do this” for example abt my bf
He says I can? What do u mean?
IM NOT TALKING ABT U.
But then he says ur my homie ur my best buddy basically friend zoning me ON PURPOSE when I don’t see him any other way either cuz I get awkward/don’t know what to say when he rambled abt how beautiful/great/ idk another woman is but never said anything like that to me. It’s so annoying.
Can someone explain this weird behaviour omg

My boyfriend is starting to give me the ick and I don’t know if it’s fixable or if I’m just losing attraction.

He’s 6’3, has a good face, is active, plays sports, goes outside a lot etc. but physically he’s just not really my type. He’s kind of skinny fat with gyno, narrow shoulders/arms, feminine hips and a bigger butt and his buttcrack often times shows when he walks or bends down and even in front of my family which made me feel embarrassed. I’m really attracted to more broad/muscular/fit guys. I feel horrible even typing this because I do genuinely love him and my body isn’t “perfect” either.

On our pool date, he also wouldn’t really get into the water because he “can’t handle the cold” or jump in with me like I wanted because it was cold while all the other guys were. I just was swimming alone with him watching mostly. It gave me an ick for some reason.

Even during sex I felt awkward and emotionally disconnected that day even tho it’s normally good. After we argued a lot that day, I started awkwardly laughing and acting emotionless and stiff during sex because I just felt uncomfortable mentally and physically I kept noticing how sweaty he got, his shoulders, how he was intensely staring at me and his gyno constantly pressing against my breasts. (Tmi I know) He got upset and we had to stop for a bit because it became awkward because of me.

He also notices my reactions sometimes when he flexes or tries to show off and gets upset because I apparently make faces without meaning to.

The bigger issue though is the toxicity/jealousy. During the pool day he randomly started threatening to text guys I talked to after seeing I was becoming internet mutuals with a girl from his past he used to talk to. (He made it clear he didn’t like me being friends w her multiple times but then was okay with it multiple times so bringing it up at a date again seemed dramatic) Then he started arguing with me in public bc I wouldn’t give the name of the guy to the point I was sobbing and breaking down in front of everyone, because we finally had a date and he had to ruin it by walking off and coming back multiple times, touching me and hugging me and trying to kiss me when I said no leave me alone, profusely apologising when he can tell I’m very stressed and anxious.

The worst part was when people walked by and he loudly said “you’re crying because you cheated on me.” Later he said he only said that so people wouldn’t think he was abusing me. Then he actually texted the guy after begging for his Instagram, and only stopped when I said we were done.

Afterwards he bought me flowers/gifts/food after I’d been asking for flowers for a long time, but it kind of made me sad because I only seem to get nice gifts when things are going badly.

Also he doesn’t let me wear leggings “bc of hygiene reasons” even tho it’s bc guys are lookings, go to clubs, look at a guy or a nice car for 0.3 miliseconds or I have “wandering eyes”, accuses me of watching his eyes when girls walk by (I don’t), doesn’t let me go to bday parties where there is guys and he isn’t invited, and won’t let me go on vacation to spain with a friend alone because I will go to clubs and he doesn’t trust me!!! Wtf

I genuinely do love him and for the rest I’m very attracted to him, his personality and his face and everything which is why I feel conflicted, I want to stay with him but can’t handle his jealousy and want to tell him to work out but not sure how.

This is kinda long but I wanted to vent and want to know if I’m a bad person for feeling this way sometimes.

Need some money subs recommendations
Anything to do with money/job/career/getting money out of no where u get it

What’s a sub that worked SUPER well for you?
Any recommendations?