u/ProbWithMyDog

How far do you drive to get to church? How many miles away / how long does it take you to get there?

Office Romance was okay but too raunchy for my taste. Voicemails for Isabelle is hands down 10x better than Office Romance, and I will die on this hill!

Zoey Deutch was hilarious and phenomenal, and we need more Nick Robinson in rom coms! Such a great plot, great acting, and all the old school rom coms vibes! More please!

I’ve watched every season of Survivor, and I cannot wrap my head around how most of the women wear skimpy bikini tops or their buffs as a tube top. Hoooowwww can they run and be active during challenges without “the girls” slipping out or flopping around???

Maybe it’s because I’m super busty, but I just don’t get it. There have been a few women who have worn sports bras, but why isn’t this the norm? Unless I was allowed to wear a SheFit sports bras, there’s NO way I would be able to play and be active. Oh the pain of flopping around! Ahhhh!

Am I the only one who has thought about this??

I was wanting to take the DART green line to Akard Station tomorrow morning to go to Flying Horse coffee shop. I know World Cup games are being played at AT&T stadium, but is it really crowded in downtown Dallas?

Summer break in Texas, and it’s too dang HOT to go outside between 10am-8pm ha. Although today is not too bad.🥴

I see everyone’s plans they’ve been posting, but I’m trying to find ideas of what to do with my dog! She’s a 17 lb mini Aussiedoodle and my whole heart.🩷🥹

I leave her at home during the day during the school year, and the last thing I want to do is leave her at home by herself to go off and do something without her.

Any fun, dog-friendly things to do beyond the typical walk/dog park? Bonus points if it’s indoor (which is a challenge to find dog-friendly indoor places to go!).

I posted earlier about currently being with Equitable but looking into other options since Equitable’s fees are higher.

I called Vanguard. I explained that my Equitable financial advisor manages EVERYTHING for me: my 403b, Roth IRA, and non-retirement investments. She did all the behind the scenes work to get my money taken out pre-tax from my school district paycheck. She allocates all my money into different areas for my investments. She took my mom’s 403b money and put it into an inherited Roth IRA. She does everything.

Well after speaking to a Vanguard rep, all of the terminology was going over my head. He said they don’t do 403b accounts and that it would have to go into a pretax Roth. I’m literally looking at the website, and there’s an option for 403b. He said I’d have to basically manage my account and figure out how to diversify my investment money, or I could pay a higher fee for someone to help me. My Roth money is a whole other story since I inherited that money.

All I know is, I got off the phone and started crying from the anxiety. I don’t know what I’m doing. I know Equitable has higher fees, but my advisor helps me with everything. I guess that’s the cost I pay.

Again, I ask for grace because all of this is so confusing to me. I feel so stupid trying to figure out all of this.😔

I’m thinking about leaving Equitable and going with another company that has lower fees (less than 1%) as well as fiduciaries.

For anyone who has left Equitable after being with them for several years and having had a financial advisor you’ve had a really good relationship with your advisor…how did you have that conversation with them?

I’ve been with my advisor for 10 years. She’s helped my mom get a job with her bosses years ago when she was laid off. She’s been with me through a lot of big life obstacles. I can text her, ask a million questions, etc. She’s really the best…but the 2.5% in fees is going to crush my retirement and investments.

I wish she was working for a different company, but she’s not, and at the end of the day, I need to look out for myself and my finances.

I’m just nervous about having that conversation with her.

Side note: I was looking at buying a home 1.5 months ago. When I told my lender I was going to do my due diligence and look at a couple of other lenders’ fees, she got really defensive and basically told me she wasn’t going to put as much effort into my account and will focus on other accounts of people who are with her. I ended up not buying the house then cut ties with her and the realtor.

Anyway, she reacted like that, and I only had known her for a month. I’ve known and worked with my financial advisor for 10 years. How do I have a conversation with her about wanting to move forward with a different company that has less than 1% fees and fiduciaries?

I’ve been going to PF since 2022 and pay $8 for the basic membership. I was considering upgrading to a Black Card Membership, so I could utilize the perks, specifically the hydro massage, because I’m on summer break and have the time after my workouts to do that. Is that $25/month?

However, after summer is over, I would want to go back to the basic membership because I wouldn’t have time in the mornings after working out to utilize the perks. If I were to go back to the basic membership, how much would that be? I’m assuming I wouldn’t be able to lock in my current $8 rate.

Lots of thoughts/questions, long post ahead...thank you in advance for following my tangents...

I always hear that renting is "throwing away money," so I started looking for houses back in March. I found a half duplex I liked, went to the open house, and put in a bid. I did the math, and I would have to dip into half of my investments for a down payment/closing costs just to get my monthly payments between $1500-1600. I went under contract at the beginning of May for a half duplex but backed out after the inspection - lots of big ticket issues I wasn't willing to deal with (plumbing, electrical, roof, etc.).

But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that the $1500-1600 was my base. I had already created a budget in Google Sheets, and after all of my bills and expenses, I'd have less than $500 monthly to put toward my HYSA (to account for home repairs) and investments, and I was already contributing the bare minimum to my 403b.

After much reflection, I've decided that renting an apartment (not a house) will be my future. I'm a 42 yr. old single dog mom who lives in Texas - suburb of Dallas. Right now, in year 18 of education (12 as a teacher, 6 as a counselor) I gross $74,370 and take home $4,568. My rent/water/trash/fees average $1330-1350. After the rest of my bills and daily living money, I end up with around $100-1500 leftover at the end of each pay period. If I really buckle down, it's around $1700.

I have TRS (Teacher Retirement System) but also supplement with my 403b and Roth IRA. I also have non-retirement investments. To break it down...

403b (started in Nov. 2016) - $49,071.57 - I know it's not a lot, but that's what I have.

Roth IRA (started in Nov. 2023) - $17,932.75 - This money came from my mom's 403b. She passed away in Sept. 2023, and my financial advisor moved this money into a Roth IRA for me.

Non-retirement investments (started in Oct. 2024) - $126,126.93 - I had $80k sitting in my bank savings. I was always nervous to invest but decided to go for it. That's where I'm at.

Side note: I also started a HYSA with Marcus Goldman Sachs in April and had almost $9k but had to majorly dip in recently because of an ER visit and my catalytic converter needs to be replaced, sigh.

Anyway, all three of those accounts are with Equitable, but after reading several posts here on Reddit, I've discovered Equitable isn't the best company to work with since the fees are high. Excuse me for my ignorance, but I'm learning, and I'm thinking about transferring everything to Vanguard, which is on my school district's list of approved investment companies. Not sure what penalties I will have to pay to Equitable and how I will break the news to my finanical manager of 10 years who has been nothing but wonderul and helpful, but that's a whole other conversation.

A few questions...

Because 403b is taken out of my paycheck pre-tax and will be taxed after I take money out after I retire, should I just stop contributing to that and focus on maxing out my Roth IRA each month as well as continuing to put in money to my investments and HYSA?

As someone who works in education, I went with a 403b because that's what I was told to do to supplement my TRS. It wasn't until recently that I started understanding more about finances and realizing that Roth IRA money is already taxed and won't be taxed after retirement when I decide to take out that money.

All that said, circling back to rent vs. buy...if I buy a home, I won't have hardly any money leftover each month to keep up with investments and contribute to my 403b/Roth. I'll have enough to save 1% for repairs but still don't think that's enough. Plus, taxes and insurance go up each year, and I honestly don't think my salary can keep up with that and inflation. By the time I'd pay off a home, there's still taxes, insurance, home repairs, and bills, and I don't think all of that will be less than renting.

Now for renting, I've been in my apartment for 5 years, started at $1095/mo (plus trash/water/fees) and is now $1213/mo (plus trash/water/fees). It's averaged a $23 increase each year, which I don't think is too bad. If I keep renting, and if rent continues on this trajectory, I feel like I'm much more able to afford rent plus have a decent amount of money leftover to contribute to my 403b, Roth, HYSA, and investments.

Side note: When I walk my dog around my apartment complex, I see elderly people all the time. One sweet lady is 90 years old and still walks her dog daily. So I know there are people out there who are older, retired, and rent.

I just feel like society pushes for people to buy a home because that's the "American Dream," but in today's society and economy, is it really? Kudos to people who can afford it, but as a single person with my income, I just don't see it happening and want to be okay with being a life-long renter.

P.S. - My apartment is 3.8 miles / 10 mins from my school, 2-4 miles from grocery, shopping, dining, dog park, Christian Brothers (that has a free shuttle), and 20 mins from family. The only downside is I don't have a yard for my dog, but I take her outside and to a very close dog park.

Thank you for reading my lengthy rambling! Thoughts, feedback, and insight is appreciated. :)

Preface: I ask for grace because I’m not the most financially literate person and trying to learn and grow…

Does anyone use Equitable Advisors (formerly AXA) for their 403b / Roth IRA / non-retirement investments? People in education, more specifically.

Elementary school counselor here, former teacher, just finished year 18.

Ten years ago an AXA/Equitable advisor visited my school to discuss 403b accounts. I knew I needed to start one. Several coworkers already worked with her and highly recommended her, so I met with her and started a 403b. I’ve been with her for these past 10 years, and she’s been nothing but helpful, patient, responsive, and overall wonderful. When my mom passed away three years ago, she helped move her 403b money into a Roth IRA for me. I’ve even asked her financial advice on a person level.

I would say I’m not super financially literate, so I’m always asking questions and even when things are explained to me, it can take a while to sink in and understand. One thing I’ve wondered is how does she get paid? I just recently did some digging with the help of Gemini AI and discovered how much of a cut they get from my investments and that it’s much higher than other investment companies.

Furthermore, Equitable went to court for misleading teachers’ account statements and agreed to pay a $50 million penalty.

https://www.sec.gov/newsroom/press-releases/2022-124

Now I’m questioning staying with Equitable and considering transferring all of my accounts (403b, Roth IRA, non-retirement investments) to Vanguard, which has less fees and is more transparent and is on my district’s list of approved companies for 403b (and it’s also Roth approved and assuming I can transfer my investments here, too).

Has anyone switched from Equitable to Vanguard or any other investment company? If so, did you have to pay any exit fees/surrender charges? Was it easy to transfer your 403b/Roth/Investments?

I’ve never managed these accounts on my own since my Equitable advisor has always walked me through everything, so I’m intimidated to be honest, but I don’t want to keep losing money to the high fees Equitable charges (2-2.5%) as opposed to keeping more of my money with lower fees (less than 1%) at Vanguard.

Any advice/help is appreciated!!

First-time home looker/buyer with certain hopes as far as commute to work. I’m single and work in education, so I’m not making the big bucks, but putting as much money into my investments and HYSA as I can. I still feel like I can’t afford much.

I work in Las Colinas and have family in south Irving. I would like to have a work commute no more than 20ish minutes and also stay as close to family as I can. Irving housing prices are expensive. I’ve looked in Euless and Carrollton, too, but Euless would be ideal.

I’ve also looked into Grand Prairie, but here’s the thing. It seems like the only way to logistically get to Las Colinas is to rack up tolls on 161 or spend an eternity driving up and down Belt Line. A couple of the homes I was looking at are close to Belt Line.

Is there any other sort of commute I’m not seeing that isn’t tolls but quicker than Belt Line to get from GP to Las Colinas? That’s the main issue that’s holding me back from home hunting south of Irving.

This is the first house I put an offer on, and the seller countered, and I accepted. I was so excited, but I knew I had to get through the inspection. I know they say to show up the last 30 min, but I asked if I could be here the whole time, so I could measure everything (thinking about furniture and whatnot). He was totally fine with that.

So today’s the day…
My aunt’s brother is a master plumber with his own business, and she sent two of his guys out to run a scope through the clean outs. They showed up right before the inspector did. Based on their images, there’s one PVC pipe that runs toward the street, but the other one going toward the house is cast iron with a big crack and a tree root.

That was just the beginning. Then the inspector, who has been very thorough, is finding all sorts of issues—way too many to list here.😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

Before today, I was convinced I wanted this house soooo badly! Now, I want my earnest money back and want to run as far away from this house as possible!🫣

I literally don’t even want to ask for concessions—there’s NO WAY the seller will agree to fix all of this (replacing a cast iron pipe, electrical issues, and much more).

I know my realtor will try to move forward (he’s been kind of pushy throughout this process), but I don’t want to at all. Ugh just venting.

Watching this 4-hour inspection has me terrified that any house I go for will be like this!!