u/SobrietyDinosaur

My boyfriend lives in a different state. Our relationship is really good honestly. I just got back from seeing him and now I’m back to feeling obsessed with him. He normally just calls me throughout the day instead of texting which I’m still getting used to, it’s nice he’s consistent. But anyways I’m so happy when I’m with him and feel hopeful for the future, but when I come back to my state I hate my life. I feel sad. My job sucks a lot and has caused me so much stress. I hate the state I live in. I’ve known him for like 13 years and we dated in the past. Since then we have both became sober (long term sobriety for both of us now). So we naturally came back together. But I’m so in love with him. We are taking things slow. Which I’m not used to but speeding through everything has gotten me no where. How do I become happy when I’m not with him? I don’t have hobbies really to begin with. And my friends are always busy with their families.

I have to work tomorrow and wake up at 4 am. There is a park with a green belt behind our house. So they’re lighting fireworks right behind our house. Can they do this at a park? They’re the fireworks that sound like bombs going off.

Tastes terrible lol. Yes I sprayed it in my nose but it leaks down and I can taste it. So I went with mindscape and I’m trying the combo of troches and nasal spray. I usually do IV but I’ve only been doing that once a month or maybe every other month. So in between I do troches to help with anxiety. I feel like the iv helps immensely for my depression but doesn’t help the full scale of anxiety I have completely. So that’s why I do this in between. MD is aware. But anyways, my troches came in orange flavor and that is disgusting. I think I rather just have no flavor than have fake flavor taste. All around yucky lol. What are some good flavors you’ve had? So far I’ve had peach and orange. Hate them both equally.

I pay $250 for IV, which I can only afford to do monthly (good price too compared to other places). I was going to switch to troches and mindbloom is like almost $500 for troches… and betterU is expensive too.

I requested a refill and nothing happened. I made an appointment then it isn’t showing up. Who else can I go through? There is no real person I can get a hold of and talk to too. It’s extremely frustrating. I’m going to be out of my med soon.

Last relationship was with the wrong person, but more importantly I ruined it with being codependent on him. This new one I’m in 2 years later is so calming and fun at the same time. We can talk about anything and I feel at peace when I’m with him. It feels different. What has helped train me is probably because we are long distance so it forces me to focus on myself. The challenge will be when I move to Hawaii with him. But we aren’t rushing it! We are taking things slow. I’m so excited. I just continue to work on it daily, at first the obsession was real, but after talking to my therapist and aa sponsor we turned that right around. Just sharing my success story because my life feels really good right now 🙂

My whole life I’ve had a serious sweet tooth. Since being on this medication sugary things don’t excite me anymore. It’s really great! Like the other day something was too sugary for me!! Which never happens. It’s like this medication forces me to be healthy :)

I don’t know if this is a thing in other states, but we can do like a resort pool pass for $25-$75 a day per person here. There are no filters that say there are adult only pools. Makes me sad because I want to have a relaxing experience at a beautiful pool without screaming children. Anyone know of any good resorts in Phoenix Arizona with adult only pools?

Not really sure what to do here. The soonest therapy appointment I can get is Monday, but I work tomorrow. I have all the symptoms possible for burnout. I’m fine when I’m not at work, but the night before I work and when I work I’m not okay. I can’t transfer units for a month and idk how I’m going to make it. I’m looking into OR or PACU next. Any tips would be welcomed because I do work tomorrow. I don’t know how I’m going to make it through the shift. I’ve worked PCU for 6 years and I’m dead inside. I’m extremely depressed and anxious when I’m at work. I can’t call out since I have too many absences. Back in October I took 3 month medical leave. I just can’t financially do that again. I’m worried I’m going to snap. Not many places are hiring so I was going to stick with my hospital but just change units. I don’t think I can do bedside anymore unless I get some miracle therapist. I’m on meds too. Have any of you made it through burnout? How? Because I feel pretty hopeless about it.