u/Solid-Scholar-2085

So me (30F) has a boyfriend (40M). We have been together for over a year and it’s the healthiest and most genuine relationship I’ve had so far, it’s really nice. But like any couples we have some problems.

Long story short he was married before once and like most happy couples we started talking about marriage as well after a while, well him more than me. The problem is that every time that topic pops up in the conversation or I think about it my thoughts go: “He was married before so it’s not special if we do it”. I know that might sound super immature but it’s how I feel. Also I know he suffered a lot after the divorce even if I’m positive he s totally over her. He keeps saying he s never felt this way before and this thing with me is different and I feel the same but how can you say that if you were MARRIED? I guess I m too embarrassed to talk to anyone about it and no, we’re not marrying anytime soon but if the relationship goes on I ll have to make a decision and I really dislike the thoughts I’m having.

I was also considering maybe I feel this way because I was never married or didn’t have relationships as serious as he had so it feels like imbalance? He never tried to make me feel bad about it or anything like that but I have a history of bad relationships so it s more of my problem ig. Am I irrational and how do I get over it? I also feel like I don’t want to give him that like he chose to do it with someone else he doesn t get that from me too. But also i don t wanna be with someone for 5 years and no rings. Yes i m complicated lol.

What do you think? I know many people marry multiple times but it s not for me. Also i m very good at finding problems

TL:DR My boyfriend was married before and when we think about marriage it makes me feel insecure and like it wouldn t be special because he had it

I feel like my mental health is going downhill again and it s something i experienced many times. I feel like i m self sabotaging everything atp including my relationship and i m honestly being insufferable i can t stand myself atp.

I live in a wonderful place something i ve always wanted but i can t bring myself to do anything don t have any friends and i feel like i m wasting my life at this age. Maybe it s just fomo but i don t know i feel so bad i don t feel like i could be happy ever again it s like nothing ever works out for me maybe i m just stupid and i make stupid decisions. I don t knowx any advice to not feel like this?

Hi! I just moved here and don’t really have friends or anything I’m currently looking for a job so there’s no way to socialize unless I join a club or something.

I am normally friendly and capable to integrate but sometimes I have social anxiety and it’s very hard for me. Any recommendations of what I should do? I speak basic Spanish and looking to improve so I thought language classes? Also I’m into sports but my budget is pretty tight and not sure I can form friendships with my coworkers? I feel a bit down and pretty desperate I’ve only been here for a few weeks and I feel like maybe I made a mistake and don’t dit in? I came here because I love the city and I wanna learn the local languages and explore the culture.

I just feel like I’m judged if I do things alone but I guess it’s the anxiety? What are people like here do they care? What about activities like yoga classes or dance classes? Also I wanna go to the beach but I m alone and can t leave my stuff unattended i feel like i lost this summer already. Any advice?

I, I have a question for the older people here (with or without kids). Are you happy about your decision? I’ve been thinking about this even if I’m still in my 20’s. I pretty much dislike children and for most of my life I said I’ll never have them but at the same time I don’t know?

I like the idea of it, having a child with a partner and then raising them and offering them what you didn’t have, being a good parent and teaching them everything you know, giving them everything is such a wonderful thing and also I’m thinking I might regret it if I’ll never have them? But at the same time I feel like they ruin your life and each time I hear someone has kids I’m thinking poor them. I guess it’s because of my split personality, I’m very caring and loving but st the same time very independent sometimes selfish or individualistic. Also, I’d only have kids if I found the right partner.

I’ve always liked being independent, focusing on myself and my career and I think I might need to do that forever. Or is it just a selfish phase and I should have the kids at some point? I’m thinking I’d never have them earlier than 33 or something like that but yeah. Do you have kids? Do you not? Ro you regret your decision? I’d like to hear the opinion of people that are in their 40’s or older especially

Edit: after reading the comments and giving it more thought i concluded that: If you’re super happy with your life without kids and you re not really sure you want them and think you d be ok without maybe it s best not to have them and if you feel like your life is empty and you wanna try maybe you should have them no

Also i was thinking of just becoming a very good aunt or look after my friends’ kids

Hi! I recently moved to Barcelona (just a few weeks ago). I’m F20 and I love socialising and going out, sports etc. Any advice for making friends here? Locals or not I don’t care as long as they are nice and easygoing.

I’ve been going out alone or with some acquaintances but nothing more and I’d love someone I can hang out with occasionally/ go to the beach etc. DM me if you want ☺️

So I’m looking to rent a studio (mostly on Idealista) or a very small apartment and in most of them it says “only for 1 person” or “no couples allowed” does that mean 2 people can’t move in or that you can’t bring your partner there? Does anyone know? I personally find it very strange.

Also any other tips on where and how to find a studio or small apartment?

Hi! I recently moved to Barcelona after a gap year and decided it’s time to study, but I know that at the UB they don’t offer full studying in English only (only if I study international business, economy or English).

Back home (or in other countries) I know many people who studied international business or something similar and didn’t do anything with their degrees. Is it a worthless degree? Also are only “rich kids” studying it or is that a mit? Any advice would be welcome if you study it, know anyone who does it or have any sort of advice. And yes, I know it sounds really stupid

Hi! I am interested in studying psychology at the UB, does anyone here know anything about it? Any information would be helpful. I’m more curious about when I have to apply, what I’d have to do for admission and how much I could study in English? My Spanish isn’t good enough yet. Also how valuable would the degree be in Europe?