I got a flashback today at lunch with my friends of my past >! self harm through burning !< . They had just shown me a picture of a burning marshmallow and I don't know how my mind brought me to that and while leaving I almost fainted but I had water and gathered myself. I used my resources to feel a little better and am in my hostel now.
Last night I had a nightmare of being in a courtroom and not being believed and instead being cross examined about what happened with me. I didn't wake up thanks to my meds but it was a bad nightmare. Also today in the morning after gym when I went for breakfast I cried because of a flashback of the assaults that happened with me. I am able to handle myself sure, but this is new, the way I'm remembering things. Any advice?
I'm in my 2nd year of law school and I love what I'm studying even though at times it makes me question a lot of things around me. One thing that I have learned till now is to own my truth and my version of events. If I can't do this for myself, I can't expect another person to do it for me. Nor can I expect myself to be able to help another person own their truth or find the relief they're seeking.
I'm in my 2nd year of law school and I love what I'm studying even though at times it makes me question a lot of things around me. One thing that I have learned till now is to own my truth and my version of events. If I can't do this for myself, I can't expect another person to do it for me. Nor can I expect myself to be able to help another person own their truth or find the relief they're seeking.
Last night I had a nightmare of being in a courtroom and not being believed and instead being cross examined about what happened with me. I didn't wake up thanks to my meds but it was a bad nightmare. Also today in the morning after gym when I went for breakfast I cried because of a flashback of the assaults that happened with me. I am able to handle myself sure, but this is new, the way I'm remembering things. Any advice?
When the hands from the spool start to swoon, To locks that press the soul beneath. All they gain is control over the puppet, Playing games till it's time for supper.
Whoever knew playing could turn into preying? Where the prey is made to bend and comply. What started once tries to extend, Like a cat-and-mouse chase that never ends.
Strings pulled tighter, breath grows thin, A silent war beneath the skin. Each whispered move, each forced disguise, Reflected faint in hollow eyes.
The hunter grins behind the thread, While pieces dance as if not led. No spark breaks through, no voices rise, Just quiet loops and practiced lies.
And when a thread begins to fray, Another hand will take its place. The stage resets, the roles replay, No trace of struggle left to trace.
For even broken things can bend, And call their binding something kind. Till prey and player start to blend, And no one’s sure who holds the mind.
I'm in my 2nd year of law school and honestly it's been very emotionally taxing for me. I loved reading which is why I wanted to study law, but then I started making sense of things that happened with me and now I feel shattered to the point nothing in my life makes sense anymore.
I'm in my 2nd year of law school in the 5 year program and I think I made a mistake.
I just reached my hostel and took a shower. I feel extremely dizzy. I had a midsem in college today after which I had plans to go for dinner with my friends from my college society. We went out, had fun, etc. On the way back, the music got so loud that I went blank. I was pulling my hair, closing my eyes, covering my ears and trying to breathe. I kept saying please and crying. I had a flashback too of being locked in a room and being hurt. By the time we reached college and the bus stopped, one of my friends tapped on my shoulder and I screamed. I looked for my SOS medicines while trying to make sense of things and walking back to my hostel. This would not have happened had I carried my headphones. But I couldn't go back to my room after my midsem at 8pm so I left from there directly instead. I hate myself so much for being so stupid.