u/cardroppingcard

romance and sex is overrated

my first point is about how its everywhere in books/movies even if its not inherently a romance book. they will just add in a sloppy romance side plot and it doesn’t even make sense. there are only like a few books without any romance or romance side plots which are just frustrating. it’s literally everywhere in media

my second point is that most people act like the only reason for living is to find a romantic partner and get married. also when people will just see two FRIENDS hanging out on social media or irl they immediately say “ship” or something along those lines. its so annoying can people not be friends anymore? people also assume like everyone wants sex or a romantic relationship. like no just cause i like hanging out with my friend does not mean that i want sex with them.

i know people say that trans men were socialized as woman but i never felt like a woman. i felt genderless if thats a thing. it never felt like i was transitioning from female to male, only like nothing to male if that makes sense?

i just wanna know if anyone else can relate cause when i speak to other people about this they usually assume that i was socialized as a girl.

another thing is that most woman think i relate to them cause i was “socialized as a woman” but i never related to woman’s experiences. i felt like i didn’t fit anywhere until i realized i was a trans man.

so i just wanna know if any of yall related to this or felt like this also before realizing you were trans cause i’ve never seen any trans person say this and i felt kinda odd for feeling like this.

hi! i’m in texas and you can’t change your gender marker in texas. so i just don’t know what to do now and i feel defeated. i am transitioning but this just makes it harder to keep being trans a secret here. especially where i live in texas being out and trans is not really safe. i want to move to a different state but i still live with my parents (i’m financially dependent on them) and financially we can’t move to a different state. i just don’t know what to do anymore

do yall have any advice or just anything that can be helpful on how to cope with not being able to change your gender marker?

i started testosterone a few days ago i hate how voice sounds right now. i can’t wait until it starts dropping, so i just wanna know when did your voice drop? i’ve heard most people got their voice drop at 4 months. but i wanna know everyone’s experience. i’m also scared of not getting a voice drop cause i know that happens to some people.

so yea when did yall get your voice drop?

I AM FINALLY ON TESTOSTERONE!! I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS DAY SINCE FOREVER!!!

i just can’t believe that i’m finally on it! i’m lowkey nervous for my family to see the changes but i am excited to see them for myself!!

i made a post a while ago talking about how romance and sex is overrated in a different sub. one of the comments literally said i didn’t want a relationship cause i have trauma. which i don’t but they literally wouldn’t believe me lol.

i just wanted to share cause i found this funny how they wouldn’t believe me and kept telling me to go to therapy lol

its really overrated and it drives me crazy. especially in media, like i’m fine with books/movies having romance as a genre. but when i want a sci fi, fantasy, or dystopian book there is always a romance side plot or whatever. which okay i guess thats fine, i’ll look for one without a side plot of romance. but then there is literally only like a FEW books available cause thousands of them have romance even when the genres are not romance or anything related to that. another thing that bothers me is that so many people just assume that you wanna relationship or wanna have sex, when not everyone wants that. i get its a big thing in most people’s life but oh my gosh is it everywhere

i’ve been looking into top surgery for a while and hopefully will have an appointment by the end of this year (fingers crossed), but i’ve just been stuck on a decision, should i get nips or no nips?

my pros for nips:
- looks more masculine/cis passing
- cis
- cis
- cis
- cis

my cons:
- if nips aren’t in perfect placement, i’ll be upset/fixate on it
- more healing care (not that big of a con)
- higher risk for infections

pros for no nips:
- won’t be seen through shirts, all flat
- looks cool

cons for no nips:
- not cis passing
- dysphoria since no nips is something most non binary people choose (i’m a binary trans man)

ughh i am stuck, i really can’t decide but i feel like this is a really big thing that i have to decide on and be 100% sure about it. i’m just hoping yall could have some feedback/advice or just anything that can help me decide!

my mom won’t let me get a job until i finish transitioning or just pass as a guy. she said because as the changes happen other people will get confused and stuff. i want a job cause i’ve been thinking of getting top surgery by next summer (hopefully) and to do that i’ll need to save up but i can’t if i have no job. my mom said she would help pay for it when it happens but i know she wants to wait until i’m like 20 to get top surgery. (i’m 18 right now)

so do yall have any ideas how i could convince her to get a job or just how to save up for top surgery without a job (if thats a thing lol idk)

hi i’m about to go on testosterone in a few weeks. my mom supports me she said she will always support me but she says what i’m doing is wrong. and that going on testosterone will be painful cause you are a woman. also my religious sister showed her videos of people detransitioning before she told me this. i’m just confused, before this i was 100% sure i wanted to transition and i still do. i can’t think of a life without transitioning. but now i’m kinda scared of what they are saying. how did testosterone feel in the first few weeks you were on it? and any advice or just anything would be appreciated. i thought my mom was more supportive but now idk anymore.