u/daydreaming_pony

What questions would you ask while interviewing a library assistant, or what questions were you asked during your interview process that I should prepare thorough answers for? Any general tips about what to expect during this process?

I really want to get this job and feel as though I’d excel in a library setting, so any and all advice is greatly appreciated!

What questions would you ask while interviewing a library assistant, or what questions were you asked during your interview process that I should prepare thorough answers for? Any general tips about what to expect during this process?

I really want to get this job and feel as though I’d excel in a library setting, so any and all advice is greatly appreciated! Also, I know that a librarian and a library assistant are completely different roles, but this seems like the best forum to post this question in!

I simply do not get it. We are not compatible in a substantial way. Why are you sending me a like anyway? Are you expecting that you’ll be able to change my mind? Are you just a shallow jerk who sent a like without looking past my photos?

I have it listed on my profile that I’m looking for a long term relationship, not open to anything else so this is a compatibility that would absolutely matter with any dating prospect. Is anyone else experiencing this a lot? Also I’m a woman with a preference for men, but are men experiencing this the other way around too? It feels a bit disrespectful, and maybe even a bit misogynistic being that I’m a woman.

Even had an experience when I was talking to a guy from this app (his profile said “open to kids”, but not specifically that he wants them, or I would not have matched) and we decided to do a phone call prior to planning a date. The topic of children came up and he acted completely shocked when I said I don’t want any. He said “Oh you like really don’t want kids??” Uh yes? I’m so frustrated!

I tried to Google this question but am seeing mixed reviews. Has anyone else with wider feet gone up a half size in Sam Edelman ballet’s with any success? TIA!!

Decided to try out hinge just to see what was out there, and one guy decides to call me a “larp” as his leading line. For reference, I noted on my profile that I enjoy thrifting, manual cars, and physical media. Because I do… I’ve been collecting vintage clothes and cds/cassettes, in addition to driving a manual car for years and years. I had to google what a “larp” even was because I’m not 10 years old, and I realized that this man was attempting to call my interests “performative”.

They literally just can’t accept that we may be cooler than them or have interests that don’t involve painting our nails, putting on makeup, and doing laundry (and for the record, I do those as well). They think all we do is for their approval. I’m just going to delete Hinge to make men an even smaller a part of my life. It’s ridiculous to have to deal with this kind of immaturity from literal adult men on an adult dating app. I don’t even understand what they gain from it. Every day I become happier with staying single, the immaturity NEVER ends…

I’m a young woman and am constantly trying to find ways to reach my full potential when it comes to beauty/feminity. What are your tips? Open to any suggestions! TIA!

Also just to preface, I know that outer beauty is fleeting and true radiance comes from within 💛 but I’m just asking how to beautify the outside for today!

I babysit a few wonderful kids, and overall have no complaints! However, there’s one child (neurotypical and mid-elementary aged) who’s consistently asking me to prepare them meals that they don’t end up even taking a bite of.

How I approach mealtime is: “It’s about lunchtime, are you hungry yet or would you like to wait?” If they say they’re hungry, my response is “What would you like to eat?” They almost always enthusiastically ask for Mac and cheese or something of the sort. But once I cook it, their interest in eating is completely lost. Half the time they don’t even take a bite. I let them know the food is ready and give like 3 reminders 5-10 minutes apart to come eat before it’s cold, and it goes totally ignored so I give up. I offer different spices to add and ask which utensil they’d like to use. I give as many options as possible.

I want to believe that there’s some reasonable explanation that I just don’t understand, but often I feel as if they’re purposefully wasting my time. I have asked them why they won’t eat their food and sometimes they’ll say things like “I’m not hungry anymore” or just not respond. I don’t have the option to just not feed them when they tell me they’re hungry for lunch. And sometimes, they do actually eat it. One thing that I could see being a factor is that during this time, they’re usually locked in to a TV show and may not want to come to the table and miss something. But they can literally still see/hear the tv from the kitchen table??

The ball is in their court for when/what they eat, and they almost always just play in my face. There’s never a problem when it’s a snack or treat, only when it’s something that took me 20+ minutes and multiple dirty dishes to prepare. This child and I don’t have a close relationship but they’re otherwise respectful a majority of the time. Anyone else? Any have any suggestions of what to do differently?

Like the title says, I’m a woman who sweats a lot under her arms and hasn’t been able to find a deodorant that properly does the job. I’ve been using Secret Clinical antiperspirant and still, I have to reapply once or twice a day or I start to notice BO. I’ve also tried Men and Women’s dove, regular Secret brand, Native, and a few others. I’ve used Gel and Solid, similar results. A few of these have also caused my skin to develop rashes (I’m not sure why, assuming it’s from strong fragrance). My skin is a bit sensitive. Here are my non-negotiables for a deodorant:

1. At least somewhat affordable and preferably attainable at Walmart/Target/Amazon or somewhere like that.
2. Not the type that does damage to clothing. I know some of the very strong deodorants are known to put holes in clothing, and that’s not something I can tolerate, my wardrobe is really important to me. I’d also prefer something without a strong fragrance, but I’m willing to try it!

I know this is a lot to ask, but does anyone have a recommendation for me? If you’ve experienced this too, what worked for you? Thank you in advance!

Edit: I have tried both deodorant and antiperspirant, but it sounds like antiperspirant may be a better fit for me. So seeking antiperspirant recommendations rather than deodorant. Thank you!

So I have been using the “Dove Deep Moisture” liquid body wash to clean my vulva. Not inside of the vagina, just outside. But I tend to notice a bit of an odor coming from down there (no matter how often I wash) and I assume my soap may be throwing off my PH balance. Any recommendations on what I should be using/doing differently? I’ve been working on staying extra hydrated and I don’t wear underwear to bed, but not noticing any difference so I feel like it’s the soap. TIA!

I am a 21 year old straight Christian woman, and I’ve found it extremely difficult to build friendships with most other Christian because I just can’t handle being around those who have hateful attitudes toward the LGBTQ+ community. It drives me to anger and sin to be around this type of Christian, and I know that’s my responsibility to control but I just feel helpless and frustrated to witness such unbelievable hatred. We are called to love all of our neighbors, as we are ALL made in God’s image. I’m not saying you have to be attending rallies or parades, wearing a pride flag, or voting a certain way. I’m not even a radical myself. I’m just searching for basic decency and respect from Christians. I feel like I’m participating in disrespect towards Jesus when surrounding myself with people who are in church every week and have a strong faith, yet are disgustingly hateful to gay people while using his name to defend it. I know Jesus would not behave that way. It feels like they’re using the lord’s name in vain when making fun of, insulting, or even threatening people for being gay.

I’m not here to argue whether or not being gay is a sin. Even if you think it is, we are all sinners and who are you to think you’re above them? I just wish I could find Christian friends who believe in loving their neighbor without exceptions, and not basing it on what makes them comfortable. Also, if you see LGBTQ people as your enemy, we are called to love our enemies.

I just don’t understand, especially when this mentality is taught in a church. It’s unbiblical and unchristlike. And I know I’m gossiping and being judgmental right now, which I feel guilty about and will repent for. I know I can do better at loving my enemies and controlling my judgment, I know I’m not above these people either. I just don’t know who to talk about this to and it’s eating me up inside. Do other Christians feel this way? If so, what advice do you have for me? TIA!

I nanny a wonderful 2.5 year old child, but they’ve entered the EXTREME tantrum phase. The screeching at the top of their lungs, kicking, stomping, and crying for 15+ minutes nonstop kind multiple times a day. I’ve tried multiple different tactics: attempting to talk them through it, asking them to take a deep breath with me or use their words, giving them space, offering a hug, offering them options instead of just saying “no”, but I’m at a loss at this point. They are completely unreachable when in this state, like they can’t even hear a word I’m saying. Recently, every time they do not get their way, they completely melt down like this and have a huge fit until I eventually just give in to make it stop. Sometimes the tantrum even extends 10+ minutes after I agree to their terms, they just continue to scream at me.

Also, I’ve explained this to the parent and asked for advice but it sounds like this child is much more cooperative and communicative with their parent during tantrums, and they weren’t able to give me any other advice than what I’ve already tried. They’re able to talk the child through these episodes, come to an agreement, and help the child gain composure, but that’s just not working for me no matter how I’ve approach things or how many times I try.

So I’m coming to Reddit to ask the professionals: where do I go from here? I know that giving into a toddler’s demands is not the correct tactic, but I start to feel bad when the other children in the home have to listen to screaming and screeching for such a long time with no end in sight. Also to add context, I’m a part time nanny but have been watching this child since they were an infant. They know me very well, are comfortable with me, enjoy being around me otherwise, and usually respect me. This is a new behavior that’s progressively gotten worse over the past few months. So, please help! And thank you in advance for any tips!

For clarity, I don’t mean that they haven’t been tried on before. I know that’s not a realistic expectation on a secondhand app. I mean that they shouldn’t be listed as “brand new” if they’ve been worn out for any period of time. If you’ve worn a pair of shoes 3 times and they still look great, with maybe a few very slight signs of wear, they’re “excellent” condition. Or possibly “like new” if they’ve been worn once but do not have any signs of wear. “Brand new” is reserved for an item that’s so immaculate, it could pass off being sold in a retail store. Thank you.

Also, I’m not some kind of germaphobe and I buy plenty of very worn items. But you need to be honest and transparent in your item descriptions.

And hear me out before you think I’m some kind of harsh, dictating sitter. I enter every babysitting job with the utmost kindness and respect for both the parents and children. I don’t believe that respect needs to be earned, I believe that we should show it to each other as the default, and it can be revoked later if necessary. So if I enter a home where the children immediately meet me with disrespect, defiance, or contempt I immediately know it will not be a good fit for me. I’m a laid back sitter, I say “yes” much more often than I say “no”, and I don’t make a lot of rules. But if I can tell a child is going to be defiant anytime I do say “no”, it’s a dealbreaker. I’ve also had a few cases of the child refusing to listen to me because “their old babysitter let them do that” or “they like their old babysitter better”. If it comes up more than once or twice, that’s enough for me and not something I’ll continually tolerate.

Obviously, this does not apply to toddlers/babies or children with some kind of developmental delay who do not know better. I’m talking about intentional disrespect.

I know this goes against most people’s terms of friendship etiquette, but I hate to do it any other way. And here’s why:

1. I’m very frugal. I don’t eat out often and if I do, I’m ordering something inexpensive. I don’t care what my friends order, but it can become a financial burden when I’m buying my meal + your more expensive meal/drink every other time rather than just spending what I can afford each time. It adds an unnecessary amount of worry and stress onto what should be a fun get together. It’s also incredibly uncomfortable to tell your friend that you can’t afford their lifestyle, so to avoid being viewed as cheap or selfish I tend to just dread or avoid outings/friendships where this is the norm.

2. I feel the pressure to reciprocate perfectly equally on my turn to pay. Like if we happened to go to a restaurant for your turn to pay, I feel bad if my turn lands on getting coffee. I find myself doing mental gymnastics to decide if I’m contributing fairly or equally, and it again takes away from my ability to enjoy your company. Also, I feel extra pressure to plan the next get-together quickly when it’s my turn to pay, so I don’t seem like a freeloader who was just in it for a free meal.

Anyone else?? I am an anxious person, and I’m sure I’m probably overthinking this, but it’s something I haven’t been able to change my feelings about even into adulthood. It’s just so much easier to pay for yourself each time, and it doesn’t make you any less of a friend. Also, I know that you who do this have pure intentions and are not trying to put your friend in an uncomfortable situation. I wish we could have a conversation and come to an agreement at the beginning of a friendship whether we’d rather switch off paying or just fund ourself every time.

I’m sure this is just my anxiety talking, but I’ve recently noticed that a female acquaintance goes back and looks at all of my Instagram stories once or twice after the initial view (I’ve observed this since the new update came out). We have a positive rapport so I’m trying not to overthink it, but it makes me uncomfortable for some reason. We have the kind of relationship where we get together for coffee about once a year and chat if we see each other out and about, but that’s the extent of it. No drama or anything, but we also aren’t close and she never likes or responds to the stories.

So I’m like: is she judging me? Admiring me? Surveilling me? Taking inspiration? I don’t post anything controversial- mostly just content of my fashion, with pets and miscellaneous life events sprinkled in there. I want to think that she’s just interested in my life, but it makes me feel a bit weird and I don’t know why. Maybe I’m feeling too “perceived”. Also, I’m sure she’s probably not aware of the update or that I notice it. Somebody rationalize this with me please!

Keeping things vague for the sake of anonymity, but my parent is seeking to employ me as an assistant to their small business. This is an on-the-books company. They create the work hours and I will be paid an hourly wage, and be a part time employee. Should I be getting a W2 or 1099? Which one would be more beneficial for me financially to where I’d have to pay less taxes? And is there one option that’s “legal” here or are they both? Thank you in advance!

Keeping things vague for the sake of anonymity, but my parent is seeking to employ me as an assistant to their small business. This is an on-the-books company. They create the work hours and I will be paid an hourly wage, and be a part time employee. Should I be getting a W2 or 1099? Which one would be more beneficial for me financially to where I’d have to pay less taxes? And is there one option that’s “legal” here or are they both? Thank you in advance!

Keeping things vague for the sake of anonymity, but my parent is seeking to employ me as an assistant to their small business. This is an on-the-books company. They create the work hours and I will be paid an hourly wage, and be a part time employee. Should I be getting a W2 or 1099? Which one would be more beneficial for me financially to where I’d have to pay less taxes? And is there one option that’s “legal” here or are they both? Thank you in advance!

Edit: Thank you for the responses everyone! Seems like W2 is absolutely the right option here.

I’m a woman in my early 20’s and now have a wonderful relationship with my mom, she’s changed a TON over the years and I now consider her a close friend. However, she was extremely controlling over my femininity when I was about 10-14 and that ruined our relationship for a long time.

Here’s a few examples: In about 3rd or 4th grade, I wanted to start wearing a bra. The kind of bras I was looking at were the training type, the type that was practically a tank top with no padding. My friends had started wearing bras and although I didn’t have a large chest, I was definitely noticing changes. My mom didn’t pick her battles at this point in my life, and absolutely forbid for me to even try on a bra. She said “If you try it on, you’re going to want to keep it and wear it every day!” I don’t think I was even allowed to wear those camisole tank tops with the built in bra. It took at least a year of begging until she gave in, and after that she made bra shopping a really uncomfortable experience. As a child I just didn’t understand why, felt isolated from my peers, and it made me afraid to talk to my mom about anything related to puberty. And as an adult, I still don’t understand why she chose this hill to die on. It was absolutely ridiculous.

Other examples: She did not allow mascara until I was 13, not even on special occasions (though most girls in my town started wearing it around 5th grade), and absolutely flipped out when she noticed that somebody else had applied a little bit on me. Also, my mom did allow eyeshadow and blush so I don’t know why a single thin coat of mascara with an otherwise bare face sent her over the edge. She also made a huge fuss about me wanting to wear thong underwear in late middle school. I wore leggings daily and didn’t want thick underwear lines, and most of the other girls in my grade were allowed to wear thongs and shop at Victoria’s Secret. I felt embarrassed to even look in the direction of Victoria’s Secret when I was at the mall with my mom. I was absolutely petrified to talk to her when I got my period, had a boyfriend, or went through other challenges and changes because of her attitude around these things. I have other examples as well, but you get the point.

So my message here is for mothers: pick your battles. Don’t larp on these unimportant things and make your daughters feel like crap for wanting to take steps into womanhood as they grow up. And if you truly believe they’re too young for something, have a good reason for it and explain why. I didn’t tell my mom anything and became a super sneaky teenager because she had this extreme attitude about things when I was a kid. Please don’t make your daughter be the odd one out when it comes to harmless preteen/teenager experiences. If I wasn’t as forgiving of a person as I am, I would’ve never given my mom another chance when I was older and likely gone no contact.

Also: Did any other women experience this? I grew up in a pretty religious household, and the other girls at my church were much more childlike and conservative than I was, so that probably played a factor into things as well. How did this treatment from your mother impact you, and how is your relationship with her now?

I notice this with a lot of female content creators on TikTok, especially fitness influencers. It’s often a video where they have a clothing product linked, and proudly state “And I’m wearing an XS!”. Meanwhile, the XS is absolutely digging into their skin and practically bursting at the seams. Or when it’s a clothing try on video and they’re like “This top is pretty cute, but it’s a medium so it’s WAY too big on me” and the top fits perfectly.

As a woman, I totally understand the societal pressure to be thin and small. But what is wearing clothing that clearly does not fit you going to do? The extreme tightness is so much more unflattering to your appearance than just wearing a medium. Nobody can see the size on your tag, and you have the option to not state your clothing size on the internet if you’re embarrassed of it. I’m a thin woman who works out a lot, and I wear anything from a small-medium-large just depending on what fits me best and is most flattering on my body. Are people truly embarrassed of wearing something larger than an XS/S even if they have a super fit and toned body? Is it some kind of status thing that I’m missing? Is it denial that you’re not in a child’s body anymore? Is this part of ED culture?

Also, I know that men do this too so I’m not just calling out the women. Seeing male gym influencers wearing these vacuum sealed toddler sized shirts is not appealing to my eye either. Can we please all just wear clothing that fits us?