I came to my ex with pills in my hand ready to commit, and he said I was being too much to handle and went back to sleep
I was going through some deep shit at that point in my life, and really needed help pulling my head out of the place it was in before I called and had myself hospitalized. But instead of helping, he said (with a very sardonic tone): “What? Do you need me to take them from you or something?” And I just kinda sat there for a second because that wasn’t what I was expecting him to say, but I got defensive and said “no” and grabbed all the bottles I had gathered and kept the pills in my hand. He rolled back over and said he was going to sleep because he was tired and this was too much for him to deal with. He didn’t even try to take the bottles, but I guess that’s my fault for saying no.
The next day I went to this urgent care for mental health and spoke with a therapist. She helped me create a safety plan, and part of that plan was that if things ever got to that point again I needed to be hospitalized no matter what. Regardless of anything I needed to go. I told my partner this, and he said he wouldn’t hospitalize me because of money and being afraid he wouldn’t be able to cover my bills. He said “and who would have to cover your bills while you’re sitting in the hospital for a week or longer, huh? Me!” He frequently went on spending sprees and spent a lot of money on meaningless items.
I’ve left the relationship now, but these two situations still really stick with me. After being together for 5 years, it really seemed like he had no care for my life and whether I actually committed or not. Idk what his goal would’ve been, but I started to fear that something was being planned to hurt me or that he was just waiting for me to actually do it so he could have all my stuff. I collect a lot, but he’s a bigger collector and that’s where all his money would go.