Im nothing and im empty

2 years ago was one of the worst days of my life, before that day my life was at a peak and perfect. I had everything going for me. But then i experienced the worst day ever, my whole life trajectory changed that was supposed to be the most important month of my life and i failed my self. I was having dreams of the day happening again which felt terrible i talked to my family about it they said i should have those dreams so it would never happen again. I kept having those dreams for a few months, and during those months I felt like nothing, I didnt feel anything i was just there existing. Being with friends felt fun but then id go home and i realize i wasnt actually enjoying myself. Nothing I ever did I enjoyed deeply just kind of surface level, 2 years later that past event has no effect on me anymore but i still think im empty. I dont feel anything emotions, i get sad once every few months. I dont know if its cause i distract myself with school, like im taking 19 credits of math and other hard classes just to chase fulfillment maybe if iam successful and have money i will feel better in 10 years? Maybe? I dont know. But my father is also dieing from cancer right now, i go to the hospital and I dont feel anything every few months i do, but sometimes i ask myself how will i feel if he passed right now, and i genuinely dont know. And my family they talk so badly about me because I dont help enough, but im literally always studying I genuinely have no time and everytime i explain this to them of how they made me felt like i have nobody in this world they just disregard it and at the end of the i just tell myself oh well. Im just here, no connection to anything, no passion or interests, just doing a major that has potential of making money i don’t particularly like it. nobody to talk to to, and i feel hollow inside like im just going through the motions. Theres no way other people dont feel like this i dont remember what true happiness feels like. What is the point of this life? If im successful will that make me happy or does that even matter

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u/ksmskdodmaosm — 12 days ago

How good is utd CS compared to top schools for getting a Faang job

Im considering coming to UTD after community college, rather than transferring to a bigger nationally recognized school. I live in dallas so it’d be very convenient. My worry is not tuition at all, but if im at utd id be close to family etc. So if Im qualified and a really good applicant, networking, projects, leetcode. Is getting a Big tech or Faang company is it very realistic? im also 100% willing to move to CA for an opportunity like that aswell.

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u/ksmskdodmaosm — 19 days ago

Which has the bigger trade offs for landing a big tech job?

Im very conflicted and wondering if i should wait to transfer in fall for better schools or transfer now for more alumni and connections. here is my plan for each.

I can wait till spring to apply for Fall for this route id have to use my dallas college alumnis for recomendations, a lot of them went to UTD so a intership for my sophmore summer definitely be possible and if not that i can do dallas college minimester programs they are CS-ish, and id be able to study for ACT/SAT and build up my ECS even more, and this would make me a T15 CS applicant.

And the other option is apply in fall for spring transfer so i can have a higher chance of getting an intership the only problem is T15 CS schools dont allow spring transfer the only one is carnegie mellon(which a spring admit is even more unlikely), but i have ACT or SAT so probably unlikely but if i did id apply to the ones that have good proximity like SCU which i can 100% get into, but i wouldnt be as good of a school. which is the better route.

please let me know some advice

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u/ksmskdodmaosm — 29 days ago
▲ 1 r/SCU

I plan to apply for SCU in Winter for CS how is it really?

Im an OOS student thinking about transferring to SCU, how is the campus life?
Is there a lot of parties that everyone can get into a non frat male, and are the bars good?
Also if any SCU alumni know, what is the access to big tech companies? And what do y’all think the avg total comp is after grad?

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u/ksmskdodmaosm — 1 month ago
▲ 0 r/udub

Mom worked in UW but never got an ID can i get residency?

Edit: Worked in Washington

My mom has been living in WA and working there for 4 years as a nurse. But she never got an ID or changed her voting. Is it possible she can get a bona fide domicile instantly after she gets an ID if she shows proof of the residency/work history and taxes.

This is the rule i intend to use the only problem is she never got an ID.
The students are claimed as a dependent on the most recent U.S. Federal Income Tax return by one of the parents/legal guardians.
At least one parent or legal guardian has established a bona fide domicile in the State of Washington.

If I get rejected chances of winning an appeal?

If this is possible my plan is to go to a Community college for 1 year then DAA to UW CS.

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u/ksmskdodmaosm — 1 month ago

Georgia tech MSQCF

I was originally going to target IB even though i love math and coding because i thought getting into quant from CC was impossible. But I didn’t know GT MSQCF has such a high acc rate. So i plan on switching degrees and transferring to georgia tech I probably wouldn’t be able to get into GT CS major because of the acc rate and im out of state, but the math acceptance rate is 44% so id rather go math + cs minor.

Also i heard Prop shops and Hedge funds mostly like undergrad students, not really masters students. but banks do hire from GT masters program so i also wanted to know if its possible to go from a bank dev to a fund/prop.

So my main questions are
is this the bet degree setup i could realistically do to get into quant from the masters.
And is it possible to get into quant dev/research from the program at a bank, prop, or hedge fund.

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u/ksmskdodmaosm — 1 month ago
▲ 11 r/Lucki

Love to see my tuneski succeeding

This is confirmation lucki don’t need all the “Lucki ecks” fans and he dgaf if yall dont like his music. Yall gonna keep complaining saying it’s trash but he keeps trending LOL.

u/ksmskdodmaosm — 2 months ago

Which school is my best option for IB

Im transferring as a sophomore and got into these schools I would appreciate advice on which offer to take.
Georgia Tech finance 3k a semester for tuition. UVA Econ non business 7.5k a semester. Notre Dame Econ non business 3k a semester.

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u/ksmskdodmaosm — 2 months ago
▲ 0 r/Lucki

If your a Lucki ecks fan and hate on his new music its not surprising, thats the whole reason there was a Lucki ecks and is now a Lucki.

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u/ksmskdodmaosm — 2 months ago

So I’m new to networking and trying to build relationships but I’m very bad at small talk, I’m good at talking just when I get comfortable with someone. But I heard just try to say anything to get a convo started. So I tried to say something like I see youve been working in new york for X amount of years. How have u liked it. But then they said “I thought this was a call about X industry”. Any tips plz

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u/ksmskdodmaosm — 2 months ago
▲ 3 r/DallasCollege+1 crossposts

So im dual enrolled in dallas and collin college, I plan to take around 20 credits this summer. I pretty much plan to give my life to school, but i want opinions on how hard this will be even with the top rated professors.

May mester

-college algebra

-hist 1301

Summer 10 week

Econ 2301

Summer 1, 5 weeks

Pre calc

Acct 2301

Summer 2, 5 weeks

Elementary statistics

Calculus 1

Only my math classes are in person to insure i will pay attention and be able to ask questions.

I think maymester will be very, very easy. Summer 1 i think is the hardest, Econ is a very easy class extremely i haven’t taken an accounting course so i wouldn’t know if its hard but i feel business courses are easy. Also Ive heard elementary statistics is extremely easy.

I plan to give around 6 hours a day on courses waking up at 6 study till 12, and I plan to have All A’s

Reminder I have the best professors that are available all 4.0+ on RMP, and i really am tired of being at CC and want to transfer asap let me know if y’all think this is doable please.

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u/ksmskdodmaosm — 2 months ago