u/loukoum2888

I was diagnosed with AvPD and bipolar disorder. I am in a depressive episode right now and I can't seem to move forward. I am deeply ashamed about who I've become now at 30. I am on disability, struggling to get by the day. I almost don't go out alone now because I fear people outside will recognize me. I feel so inferior to others. I deal with freeze everyday : dpdr, avolition and anhedonia. I have seen 7 different therapists in 6 years and none of them were helpful.

I've tried going for long walks in nature but I pass by joggers and other people walking and I feel immensely shameful even with a cap, a hoodie and my sunglasses on so that nobody will recognize me. I went once and came back home about 30 minutes later because I couldn't handle the shame.

I've been like this since I was 7. I am now on disability and starting college remotely again. But I don't know if I can handle socializing at all. I am deeply broken and I don’t know how to go on. My therapists were trauma informed, they did EMDR but it never helped.

Please, I am struggling so bad. I only have one friend left and I push him away. I wish I could be different.

As a music nerd I absolutely want Gaga to release a rock album or even just one song, that's how bad I want it, I might be in the minority here but I LOVE jazz and I enjoy her albums with Tony Bennett a bunch. I think her voice would totally match rock as we have already seen her collaborate with Metallica and others rock artists. And I can't get enough of Mayhem Requiem Killah. Of course I love pop Gaga, the disco and funk sounds on Mayhem were absolutely fun. But damn, please Gaga release a rock or metal album one day.

Hello,

I was following a vegetarian diet and though I hate eggs and meat, I never thought I could give up dairy especially because I didn't understand how a 100% plant-based diet could provide enough proteins. But about 10 years ago I remember a classmate of mine was vegan. I reached out to her on Facebook about 5 years ago to ask her to help me switch to a vegan diet. At this point I still strongly believed veganism wasn't healthy and I tried it for a day before telling her I felt sick and I would go back to eating dairy.

But she simply acknowledged it and told me to come ask her any questions if I decided to try again someday. I didn't, but she planted a seed in my mind. We're now years later and I stumbled into an article about the animal industry. I couldn't stomach watching documentaries but what I read was enough for me to want to make a change. Growing up around my parents who are huge meat eaters and thought veganism was only for "those crazy people" made me afraid of having a vegan diet. But you know, something finally clicked in my mind : if veganism was so bad for our health, why did this old classmate of mine is so healthy and thriving. I looked for more info about how I should buy cruelty free products, read about how to do a vegan diet correctly with B12 and iron, I read about the health benefits of a 100% plant-based diet. And now I am vegan.

I just wanted to tell you this short story to prove that even when you think you're not making a difference, you ARE making a difference. Now my mom asks me to send her vegan recipes. Maybe you had an impact on someone and you'll never know, like this old classmate of mine doesn't know I became vegan.

Keep up the good work! :)

Hello dear people,

I've been stuck in a weird place where I can't stand how I look anymore. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and CPTSD and I've been prescribed olanzapine for 6 years now. I put on 128lbs. The medication though? Works like a charm, I don't even have flashbacks anymore. But the weight gain is absolutely heartbreaking.

Well, I planned out my eating plan to get my macros right and gain some muscles while losing weight. I'll be mostly training at home since I am too shy and broke to join a gym. I'll be doing cardio and weight exercises. I would be glad if I see some progress, I want to be healthy!

Just wanted to share to discuss and hopefully motivate others to join me on my journey.

Hello,

When I was a baby I was allergic to cow milk and my mother gave me soy milk under the supervision of our family GP. I turned out completely fine. When I grew up we discovered I was allergic to meat and eggs. So I was basically eating a plant-based diet as a baby and then as a kid. When I was a teenager I couldn't stand the taste of meat and eggs and I couldn't get over how gross it was, so I became a vegetarian.

I recently made my first steps into veganism and while my mother laughed at me by saying I was "only eating herbs now" and how she would buy another cake for my upcoming birthday because no one will eat my vegan cake, I realized something:

My parents eat WAY less meat than before. Somehow seeing me thrive with a plant-based diet is slowly shifting how they view the food they consume, and I am really proud of that. It's my first time seeing I can have an impact on others while being vegan. It's really cool.

Did you notice something similar with your loved ones?

Hello,

I was diagnosed as highly gifted. Obviously, it means nothing when you're traumatized. I didn't get any diploma in my life. I am currently on disability, but it's not permanent disability so they could take it away whenever they want, I would still be grateful that it helped me this far though. I am almost 30, I went back to college recently. I paid to be accepted in this college and if I want to get a scholarship I need to have good grades. I haven't been studying the whole summer but I decided, fuck it. I might as well stay indoors all day and wallow in self-pity, but I need to try and get my diploma. I hate myself, might as well use the though love to succeed. I can study remotely, then what am I doing losing my time staring at the walls?

I want a scholarship and I want my diploma. I will get them. No more excuses. I had enough, I want to scream "fuck you" to all my abusers.

Hello,

I've identified as a lesbian from 11 to 22 years old. I never fell in love with a man before, I thought men looked good but I wasn't that much interested and I mostly dated women. When I was 22 I hooked up with a friend of mine, and God forgive me, that was the hottest and most romantic thing I ever experienced with a man and I haven't forgotten him since. He was a gym kind of guy and I can't forget his arms and his hairy chest.

Damn, after that I was hooking up with another guy and he had a little vein coming out of his arm and for some reason it would drive me crazy.

No need to comment on my attraction to women when I think they are just splendid and their softness is exquisite.

Fuck, I am bi...

When do you all realized you were bi? I want details! 🧐

Hello,

​I am a beginner on the Vedanta path. I was wondering how you all practice non-attachment while social media is omnipresent in today's society. How do you break free from its traps, and how do you use it with discernment? For example social media helps me watch Vedanta beginners videos and read through the Bhagavad Gita but losing hours watching reels about people accumulating wealth might not be the best use of the internet. I was wondering how you navigate the social media problem: craving and connecting?

Hello,

I am 27 years old bisexual woman. I was born and raised Catholic, lately I am leaning more Episcopalian because of their openness. I joined a church on Zoom. What makes me sad is that I live in a small town and the only church is Catholic, same goes for the other small towns around me. I found a LGBTQ+ Christian community in the nearest city, I was ready to travel 1 hour a day to go there but I think they do not meet anymore as I tried to contact them via emails, texts and calls and got no answer back.

I wish I could find an IRL community. Zoom is fine for Bible study and Sunday services but I wish I met more LGBTQ+ Christians. I don't know, it really bums me out.

Hello,

I've been going through a lot of changes in my life since the passing of a loved one, I developed health difficulties from the shock and trauma as it was a unnatural death.

Since I've been struggling but I grown spiritually and I am ready to reconnect with Christianity. I am studying theology and the Bible in college, currently reading An Introduction to the New Testament by Raymond E. Brown. As I live in a small town I don't have access to an Episcopal church so I attend one on Zoom. I even started Bible study with this church to add to my college courses.

I do struggle with parts of the Bible around feminism, LGBTQ+

I wonder if you're also struggling with this. I also would love affirming podcasts, books and perhaps documentaries about the faith from the pov of the LGBTQ+ community or women.

Thank you brothers and sisters. May God watch over you.🙌

Do you ever feel this way? Too straight for lesbians, too gay for straight guys. Maybe I should focus on finding a bisexual partner, no shame to those groups of people but most of the time lesbians think I am going to leave them for a man, and men think I am going to leave them for a woman. I am looking for a genuine relationship, I don't do casual dating so it hurts even more to have this label put on me. I am at an age where I just want a family and children, of course while taking it slowly.

Hello,

I've started my sugar free journey about a week ago. I used to weight 109kg when I began, I took a photo of myself to track my progress. Today some family members came over my house and someone told me "you lost SO much weight"

I didn't step on the scale as it's been only a week since I started and I know fat didn't magically go away but I decided to check what this was all about. I now weight 107kg. Of course weight varies throughout the day and the week so I decided to take another photo to compare with the first one I took and damn man, I look way less bloated than I did a week ago. I obviously have to keep up the progress, exercise and lose fat now, but I would be lying if I said it didn't motivate me to go on with this sugar free diet.

I didn't know sugar was changing my silhouette and my face THAT much. Anyway, let's keep up the progress.