u/megaladon44

on a teams meeting, and i'm here in my 12th house darkness, and the second i talk of course they have an instant problem with what i'm saying, doing, how i say it, and then scold me and then be bitchy later on about it with other people.

i didn't react to their behavior i just sort of let it fly. i didn't explain or justify myself. i just let them be triggered and let it be their problem. of course i have to be the mirror to show them all their issues its all so surface level for me and im proud of myself that i'm learning to not take things personally. I get to have my whole inner world and they're just stuck on the surface.

12th housers we really see it all, take it all in, and release it. its kind of amazing once you can bypass taking in their emotional gestures. none of their emotions are authentic. everything is just a play.

i hope everyones ready to bypass and release, i feel like we're going to be releasing a lot.

I feel like everything else is just an illusion. everything out there is money related. and noone is responsible for your health except you. Is this just it now?

The sun needs to hurry its ass up and get out of cancer like rn. this is a terrible look for the sun. will our leo sun's ever come out of their weird ass darkness? the other planets are partying in leo without the sun. or will the sun ruin the party?

I'm pivoting a lot and its going into gratitude and focusing on things that are working. but i live in a dense area and the people are very aggressive and loud and i feel like when i pivot that energy it kind of adds aggression to my pivoting system and the openness and calmness can resist it but that energy seems to try to take everything over. so now its controlling them and me.

any tips on filtering that energy first so it doesn't erode my system away :) ? ty!

So now shes back to texting me her travel plans and trying to get me back into this relationship where she treats me like shit and ranks everyone above me. Im like going back to not responding because i cant handle her behavior.

I hate feeling locked into her reality.

it skipped that last imaging step of autopilot where it checks everything the last time. im able to sign in and everything looks normal. i'm gonna change the primary user to the correct user. do i need to be worried?

Any tips on how you handle this? When i'm engaged with others I'm thoughtful I feel like I have a duty and a reason. but when that turns down and I'm on my own... like wtf? i isolate so completely. i don't want anyone coming around. every little external distraction starts pissing me off to no avail. the way I engaged with others is gone, and now I have no one to center on.

It feels like some kind of whiplash. and I don't really even like the isolation but its like thats just where things go so i have no choice but to live with it and elevate on my own. i feel like other people i know never isolate. ( i have sun mars mercury and vesta in aries 12th.)

how do you stay where the active spark is with life vs falling back and taking in what everyone else is doing? do you pivot the energy back into you? do you just not pay attention to other people initially so you never have to switch the focus back onto you? i start feeling so mad about having to pay attention to other people instead of living my own life! do i just start being a crazy person and be manic?

today i woke up and felt like i could actually choose a self today and go out and ignore the 'vibes' and just function as a person. the victim vibration of mutable signs has been so unbearable lately but it feels like its moving forward once again.

black pepper, garlic, dairy, vitamin d3, collagen.. they all give me nausea and brainfog the next day