u/rashfords_marcus

got put back on five mg two days ago. even though i’ve taken this before, i’m terrified of the side effects because i have crippling health anxiety.

i’m definitely having some kind of panic/anxiety attack right now, and my heart is going pretty fast. i’m scared of taking my medication when my heart is already fast, i’m scared it’s going to start fully racing.

i’ve also just been scared in general the past couple days. when i tried sertraline (zoloft?), i ended up reacting badly to food and had serotonin syndrome-like symptoms (i don’t know if it was full on serotonin syndrome, but i had many of the classic symptoms), so i’ve been scared of eating out of fear it will cause the same reaction.

basically, i’m just terrified of giving myself serotonin syndrome. my alarm is set for five minutes from now and i’m scared.

anyone know what i should do 🫠

took five mg for two months last year, stopped because of the fear of the side effects. just started it again today after having a two-day long panic attack and a mental breakdown in hospital.

i know this is a bit of nothing post but i would appreciate some good will/prayers atm… 🫠

so yesterday i had a panic attack so bad, i called 999 on myself. my heart was racing faster than i have ever felt in my life, i was shaking uncontrollably, sweating buckets, blurry vision, and i couldn’t stand up without feeling so dizzy i thought i was going to faint/die. easily the worst panic attack i’ve ever had in my life.

i went to the hospital and they did an ecg that came back all clear, but i couldn’t shake this feeling that something was still horribly wrong. i ended up having what i think was a derealisation episode for hours after i came home.

problem is, my body is refusing to calm down. now normally i would just ride the wave and try and get through it all, however i can’t do that here because i have a massive and really important day trip to belgium tomorrow. going on the eurostar so thankfully no flying involved.

to get a look into where i’m at currently, i can’t even shower without my heart rate jumping back up again. even typing this out is making me sweaty and shaky again.

i need someone to help me find a way to come back down to earth quick, otherwise my trip will be ruined and i’ll lose all the money i spent, as well as losing the trust of my friend who i am meeting up with there.

does anyone have any advice on what i can do?

(originally posted to r/casualuk and someone reminded me to post it here too)

this is a bit of a weird one but idk someone might have advice for me

i’ve been seeing a lot of videos of people coming together outside after the england matches, and that sense of togetherness and community warms my heart. but as someone who has been watching the games at home by myself, i also can’t help but feel incredibly lonely.

i want to go to the pub or fanparks to watch but most of the time, i just end up feeling like i’m in the way. i’m adhd/autistic with anxiety too, so i’m not a natural when it comes to socialising. i’m also not much to look at so i can’t really command attention or make people like me/feel compelled to speak to me.

i don’t really have any friends. the only mate i have has incredibly overbearing parents who would never let her out of the house late to watch the matches.

i want to feel the community and feel together with all the other england fans without feeling like a fraud. i know this is a really weird one, but has anyone got any advice?

this is a bit of a weird one but idk someone might have advice for me

i’ve been seeing a lot of videos of people coming together outside after the england matches, and that sense of togetherness and community warms my heart. but as someone who has been watching the games at home by myself, i also can’t help but feel incredibly lonely.

i want to go to the pub or fanparks to watch but most of the time, i just end up feeling like i’m in the way. i’m adhd/autistic with anxiety too, so i’m not a natural when it comes to socialising. i’m also not much to look at so i can’t really command attention or make people like me/feel compelled to speak to me.

i don’t really have any friends. the only mate i have has incredibly overbearing parents who would never let her out of the house late to watch the matches.

i want to feel the community and feel together with all the other england fans without feeling like a fraud. i know this is a really weird one, but has anyone got any advice?

i’ve emailed the medication team twice about seeing when i can get a new medication review, as i’m having some really bad problems with getting on medication. both times i’ve emailed them, they haven’t responded, and i just realised they didn’t even send that automated message you get when you email them.

is it possible that they’ve blocked my emails? have i been struck off the service without my knowledge?

i’m hesitant to call the phone line as the ai/automation almost always hangs up or cuts me off.

my neurodiversity along with extreme life-long anxiety has meant that over my life i have struggled to keep friends and i have often pushed people away. now i’m twenty and i have no human connection.

how do i fix it? i’m incredibly alone and it’s starting to get to me. i’ve tried to go about and be social but it never works.

i’m based in london if that is relevant.

I just came off call with of the doctors for another medication review. I was diagnosed with combined ADHD as an adult a few months ago.

At first, they prescribed me lisdexamfetamine/elvanse (not sure of the American name), but only 20mg instead of 30mg because of my history of reacting poorly to many different medications. I had to stop taking it, as my heart was racing and my blood pressure climbed to 150/90 (I was told to stop taking it, I didn’t stop off my own accord).

So today I have another appointment, and the doctor has just made me feel so… hopeless? He explained that most stimulants act the same way, so if I react to one, I’m likely to react to the others. And then made a point about how 1. non-stimulants are less effective for treating ADHD and 2. that most non-stimulants deal with noradrenaline, so would likely fuck my heart up worse than stimulants did.

I feel like I just have to resign to the idea that I’m stuck like this forever. No help, just my own fucked up head. I don’t know what I’m gonna do if they can never find a medication that works for me. If they don’t… well I can’t say much without getting this post taken down again, but I will say that living like I am now is not sustainable.

I know it’s early doors but I already want to throw in the towel. I have this weight in my stomach at the thought of never being normal. I just want to be normal and function like a normal human. Is that too much to ask for?

Before anyone asks, I’ve tried all the holistic/natural/self-help stuff and it’s all useless.

I just came off call with of the doctors for another medication review. I was diagnosed with combined ADHD as an adult a few months ago.

At first, they prescribed me lisdexamfetamine/elvanse, but only 20mg instead of 30mg because of my history of reacting poorly to many different medications. I had to stop taking it, as my heart was racing and my blood pressure climbed to 150/90 (I was told to stop taking it, I didn’t stop off my own accord).

So today I have another appointment, and the doctor has just made me feel so… hopeless? He explained that most stimulants act the same way, so if I react to one, I’m likely to react to the others. And then made a point about how 1. non-stimulants are less effective for treating ADHD and 2. that most non-stimulants deal with noradrenaline, so would likely fuck my heart up worse than stimulants did.

I feel like I just have to resign to the idea that I’m stuck like this forever. No help, just my own fucked up head. I don’t know what I’m gonna do if they can never find a medication that works for me. If they don’t… well I can’t say much without getting this post taken down again, but I will say that living like I am now is not sustainable.

I know it’s early doors but I already want to throw in the towel. I have this weight in my stomach at the thought of never being normal. I just want to be normal and function like a normal human. Is that too much to ask for?

Before anyone asks, I’ve tried all the holistic/natural/self-help stuff and it’s all useless.

not me, but my dad. he’s had three hernias in his stomach for the past two years. he was originally supposed to get surgery may 12, which was then moved to may 18, then cancelled on the day when he was already in the hospital, moved to june 15, then cancelled again.

i feel horrible for him. i can see every day that he’s in pain and how wrong his stomach looks. what do i even do though? i honestly feel like abandoning hope that his surgery is ever going to happen.

ryanair milan bergamo to london stansted fr2735, should be taking off at 20:20

i’ve never really understood why people do these but this about it is making me feel better so if you would that would be appreciated

london stansted to milan bergamo, ryanair flight with code fr2696

update - flight is badly delayed, was meant to take off at 14:55 but we’ve just boarded and could be stuck on the runway for another hour 🥲

i have a two hour flight on thursday, from london stansted to milan bergamo. i genuinely can’t see a world in which the plane doesn’t crash.

i used to be fine on planes, until the air india crash last year. a close relative of my best friend was killed. ever since then, i’ve been terrible on planes.

i’m terrified of everything going wrong. something going wrong with the plane, a crash, a suicidal pilot, a hijacking etc etc. i’ve thought about every possible fucked up way i could die on thursday.

i fucking hate how my brain works

i was diagnosed with combined-type adhd at the start of march. given twenty mg of elvanse, took one today. it sent me to a&e with a resting heart rate of 110bpm, and a blood pressure of 122/90 (my normal is 110/70).

i feel like i’m never going to live a normal or fulfilling live. i had this shit happen with my anxiety when i tried ssri medication too.

without medicine, i live in a constant state of fear and stress. it takes me over two hours just to drag myself out of bed. by the time i’m ready, i’ve wasted most of the day. i can’t do anything and it’s crippling me. i have emails i was supposed to send three days ago that i can’t even write up because my executive dysfunction is so bad. i even procrastinate the most basic things. showering, going to the toilet, fucking *sleeping*.

but with medicine, i’m making myself physically sick. my heart starts pounding and i can’t sleep. my blood pressure is through the fucking roof. i feel like i’m killing myself.

so now i’m stuck between a rock and a hard place where i’m debating if i even want to be alive anymore.

i’ve already spent twenty years in this year, i genuinely don’t think i can take one more. i have tried every single adhd hack and tip and herbal fucking remedy and none of them do shit. medication was my last hope and that’s failed me too.

i can’t live like this anymore.

prescribed twenty mg of elvanse/lisdexamfetamine two days ago after getting my official combined-type adhd diagnosis at the start of march.

i’ve had really bad experiences with psychiatric medications before, mainly ssri tablets. i know elvanse is a stimulant and works entirely different to sertraline or escitalopram, but the side effects i had from those were so intense, it terrified me. especially now that i know a major side effect of elvanse is a rapid heart rate.

when i was on escitalopram, i had the worst insomnia. i basically didn’t sleep right for seven weeks. sertraline gave me seretonin syndrome-like symptoms, and i had to go to a&e. so you can see that my trust in mental health medications are generally quite low.

i also have diagnosed anxiety and have panic attack often. when i get a racy heart, i genuinely feel like i’m going to die. i’m terrified of that happening again.

can anyone else - particularly people with combined-type adhd - give a bit of insight on what it was like starting for you?