u/throwaway10015982

Okay, so I fully accept accountability for being a lazy piece of shit, but during my undergrad I don't really know what I was thinking and in the seven years it took to get my degree I never did anything other than pass my classes (just barely). Never talked to anyone, never applied for anything, just didn't even bother. Depression or whatever, was raised by crazy people etc., manchild, etc.

I graduated a year ago with a 2.9 GPA from a low ranked state university here in California.

I don't know I don't even really want help anymore I just want to know if this is even a situation you can crawl your way out of, like I want to go finish the Odin Project or run through the whole roadmap(dot)sh thing or something but being 30 and with no experience other than retail (which is worthless) but it all seems futile given how insane the current market is especially in the Bay Area

I post here a lot with the similar question but I'm finding out from researching that even pivoting into IT (help desk) is basically impossible in my position, certs do not help, CS degree is worthless (or "overqualified", wtf how?) in the eyes of most IT managers and the only way to get hired is to somehow have previous experience which I can't get because I have no experience, which is also the same problem I have for SWE roles since every role in the Bay Area asks for 2-3 years experience minimum

I genuinely just have been having a really hard time accepting that I am completely fucked and have no future and I have no one to talk to about it. Sorry. It's been driving me actually crazy and I feel like passing out thinking about it sometimes

Just wondering. Went to college, didn't work out, not many options to get out of retail so I keep applying to places but it is very hard to get into a trade union in the Bay Area. I have been wondering though, do you effectively have no free time during an apprenticeship? I'm 30 and kind of a loser (understatement) so it's not like I am out partying or anything, so I don't mind that much but from what I've read a lot of places you'll be working over 40 hours along with school and commute time (which is significant in the Bay Area, it takes like 1-2 hours to get anywhere during most of the day due to traffic).

Honestly noticing that my temples are receding has really messed me up emotionally. I've had body image issues my entire life and have always thought (and been told) by others that I am ugly, so losing my hair is devastating to me. It is the only physical feature that people have ever complimented me on.

I saw a derm today and he confirmed that I am balding, and he said I actually even have some very, very minor thinning at the crown. I do think I might try to get a second opinion because it felt rushed and like he was trying to just sell on me on treatments but he was straight up with me and told me that two of his patients are permanently impotent due to finasteride. When he told me that it really hit me that I would be messing with my body in a major way just to keep my hair. I will never have a girlfriend or have kids anyway but it just bothered me that I would essentially be paying money to make my body work worse for the sake of my own vanity.

I am allergic to minoxidil (tried it in the past for my beard because I want even more density than I already have, wound up breaking out in a full body rash) so that is out.

Even still it's just very hard for me to accept all of this. I know I am aging (I am almost 31) but I really just expected my hair to be around forever. None of the other men in my family are balding.

I don't know this is weird, but sometimes as a child of a hoarder you feel really ashamed and less than, and I struggle with feeling like a stunted piece of shit all the time but sometimes I have to take a step back and realize how truly deranged some of my life has been, at least as I get older I sort of realized how abnormal everything was growing up

and then I was doing this trail race the other day, almost 14 miles on very hilly terrain and trail running as a sport tends to skew pretty white and wealthy, of which I am neither

but it just really hit me while my mom was yelling at me earlier for cleaning and organizing that The Hoard can make you strong too, for all the defects and mental health problems it has brought me. Thinking about all these people around me who probably grew up in clean, stable homes whose parents aren't addicted to alcohol or trash. I had zero fucking guidance and stumbled into the majority of my hobbies by accident and usually wind up feeling and looking extremely out of place.

It's funny looking at the photos of me at that race because I just look...out of place. Like I have a look about me that something has gone horribly wrong, yet there I am fucking shit up despite everything having gone wrong in my life. Like sometimes I think about the fact that I somehow managed to run my first marathon despite living in terrible conditions, like my mom barely even lets me cook so I have to cobble together a facsimile of a healthy diet from stuff that I can make in a few minutes or take out.

Or like even the fact that I graduated college, for what little good that did me. I did the bulk of my degree on a little desk in the garage that I carved out of the hoard since my living room is arranged in this weird, dysfunctional way with no where to really like, live or do stuff and I didn't have my own bedroom until my brother moved out.

IDK like sometimes it just really gets me that even people like me who didn't really get the true hoarder experience (my house has always been a level 2/3, though the garage and my childhood bedroom used to be a 4/5) have endured some pretty fucked up shit and somehow still manage to live some semblance of life. My shit shouldn't work at all and when I see how mentally ill my younger brother or older sister are it genuinely blows my mind that I am even somewhat functional.

There was never any routine or guidance or anything like that. No chores, no eating at the table together, no nothing. Just chaos and shit heaped everywhere. Probably part of the reason I enjoy running so much, the discipline, the order, the routine!!!

Graduated with a CS degree in May 2025, 2.9 GPA no internships, not qualified for SWE jobs for obvious reasons and it seems I'm not really even close to being qualified for help desk or whatever. I keep thinking about going back to community college for a two year trades program so I can have a shot at a job outside of retail but everyone keeps telling me not to give up on using my degree, but then I read online and everyone says there is effectively zero chance of ever getting a job if you are just an average person.

I don't really know what to do anymore. I want to start studying for my CompTIA certs so I can start working on a resume for help desk stuff but that's a lot of money for something that isn't going to move the needle. It seems like it makes more sense to just go do something else. The only work experience I have is ten years of retail nonsense.

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probably gonna delete this shit since no one understands or cares but TBH I increasingly feel like I just have to leave the USA if I wanna be happy. I am in a bad mood everyday and ultimately don't feel like there is any place for me in this country and like sometimes I wonder what my life could be like living in like Mexico City or whatever

In terms of character and etc. I've always wondered what kind of person gets in on their first try without prior experience in the competitive locals. I want to apply to 332 tomorrow if it doesn't fill up within 2 minutes of opening.

I know this is a dumb question but I have been feeling particularly directionless and lost after graduating college with a useless degree at the ripe old age of 29 and it routinely dawns on me how sheerly outclassed I am by so many other men my age in terms of character development and personality and I feel like I just need a reality check. I can imagine myself passing the test with a high enough score to get an interview just to get clowned on by the interview panel.

I just don't know what kind of person they are looking for. It does not feel like it would be the type of person I am. I'm some fucked up dude who lives at home with this mom and dad at thirty and posts on the internet all day and shit, never had a girlfriend etc.

I know this all sounds ridiculous but I just want to have a job worth a damn finally and realize I have to make changes

this is a podcast subreddit

anyway I think a lot about how fucked up it is, like you have hair and then one day poof

it even happens to women too to a certain degree

bleak ass world

If the only work experience you have is a bunch of shitty service industry/retail jobs, do you just leave that off entirely? Or do you leave it on there and try to make it make sense for the role?

I have a CS degree (worthless) from a state university and I’m considering leaving that off too because the common thing I see is that you are "overqualified" for help desk with a CS degree which doesn't make any sense to me.

I am going to start studying for my A+ certification soon after I deal with some personal annoyances, so I will probably just start throwing those on there. I don't even hear back or get rejections from any of the help desk roles I have applied to, so I assume my resume just sucks or I am not clearing filters since I have no certs

Graduated college with a useless degree and am rapidly aging, just want a way out of retail and have always liked cars. Do you explicitly need to go to tech school to get a job in the field? I have heard that generally you do not. I am looking at two year community college programs because they seem to be the most legit (and IIRC both of the ones I am looking at are sponsored by big brands, one of them is BMW). I'm thirty and no longer qualify for financial aid so it's not an insignificant investment of time and money. It seems like techs in the Bay Area generally make decent money though, and there seem to be a lot of options for government/fleet work around here which is my eventual goal (I would love being a mechanic for BART...)

Just wondering.

I've been trying to lose weight for a while. I'm 5'8 159~lbs (scale usually reads 72.4kg, stuck on kg and don't know how to change it to Freedom units) and want to drop 10-15lbs because I work retail full time and probably will until I die and between walking 5-7 miles 5 days out of the week and running being kinda chunky is hard on my body.

I live with a territorial hoarder who has posted up in the living room (combined kitchen/living room) so my diet has been slipping for a few years because I hate getting yelled at for cooking/cleaning and usually just slap some slop together.

I never really did figure out how to properly eat and always just stuck to single ingredient foods and it has kept me at a reasonable weight but I am constantly wondering how the more in shape/"normal" people I see at races eat.

I grew up with a shitty abusive family in poverty in one of the highest cost of living areas in the world and thought graduating college would get me somewhere but it didn't. Computer Science is a dead field at the entry level and I'm thirty and have no other options left for schooling or income. I don't have any money and just work my shitty retail job and live with my toxic parents. I am physically ugly and incredibly socially awkward and will never have friends or have a girlfriend or get married and the only thing left for me to look forward to is homelessness and housing insecurity.

I don't really know how I am supposed to cope with this any longer. I am all out of options. No I do not want to join the military.

It is over for me.

I'm thirty years old and keep wondering if I should stop putting any mental energy into the idea that I should get a job with my degree. I graduated in 2025 with a 2.9 GPA with no internships from a shitty state school and from all of my research online it basically seems like the chance of me getting hired anywhere is effectively zero. I've been applying to help desk jobs and I don't even hear back from those places.

The only call backs I've gotten are from Revature and very transparently scammy or fraudulent jobs. I did get an OA for a company in Santa Clara (which are not automatic apparently, which means my resume cleared the screen) but it is very heavy C++ stuff with concurrency and etc. which I am too dumb for.

I'm in the Bay Area so while there are a lot of jobs the competition is absolutely bonkers crazy.

I'm tired of working retail/living in poverty and might just drop back down to part time to go back to school for a different career field (mostly likely a two years associate in automotive technology) but this isn't really a decision to take lightly since I no longer qualify for any financial aid.

My general impression from reading online is that if you didn't do well in school or do internships then you are effectively soft locked out of the industry permanently, especially now given that the market is terrible.

I've been looking at some of the ones here in the Bay Area, primarily for carpentry or something along those lines. I might also just go through a two year automotive associates even though everyone says "don't fucking do it" but it's either do that or live with my toxic family into my 40's.

Trades in the Bay are so competitive that just applying for apprenticeships seems like a total dead end so I'm trying to figure out how to actually even find something to do and be taken somewhat seriously.

Local running shoe store has them for $100. My New Balance® Giga Foam Max Bl-ass-ttt Ultrastack Mondocush 40k: Battle for Ultramar are running up on 300 miles soon and since I am technically a brokie on paper I am thinking about going back to buy them. I really want the new Torin 9's but after tax they're gonna be like almost $200. What do?

just wondering because it seems like the union positions are not entry level in any sense. I have never worked construction or anything before.

I only wonder because surprisingly I passed the Local 39 apprenticeship exam, but my rank is way too low to get in that way. I am #368 (came in the last thirty minutes of sign ups, lol).

my dad told me yesterday that our mortgage payment got jacked up higher which would explain why Have A Nice Life - There is No Food all the time but like,

I don't really know what is going to happen to me in the future. I keep thinking about the man I almost hit yesterday or grey_alien_bathwater or my old friend from highschool and I just wind up feeling like there isn't really any mercy left in this world

like my main problem really is I just don't fucking make enough money to stay alive and as far as I can tell there is literally no way to fix that unless you are unnaturally smart or determined or just born into a certain social class

IDK downvote away I'm just feeling particularly sad and broken down about my complete lack of future today