u/znjznjznj

For context, we have been long distance for a year now and started having sex recently.

Since we see each other every few months, i wasnt thinking much about it the first time it happened because we had zero to little sexual experience from previous relationships, like i expected it to be "bad" in a funny-bonding way.

We talked about it afterwards, how it was, what we'll change and what we want. He couldnt make me finish and he said the next time we see each other hes gonna do it. Well he didnt.

We saw each other recently and it was so underwhelming (again).

I genuinely think our proportions just dont match. We're the same height, hes a little chubby with small hands, like a bear build, and im built in a more lean way, with longer hands. Its awkward having to do hand things when it literally fits all in my hand with a few extra cm. And it really doesnt help im all butt no chest either, so it takes a good effort for him to reach inside from behind and in other poses, it keeps falling out.

Still, height was never a problem for me. I still find him attractive and i get wet.

Apparently he is average size but to me it looks and feels small, i cant feel him inside me. It feels very empty and like my space isnt being filled enough. The only time i can feel it is when he is rough with me which doesnt happen often since thats not in his character to begin with. He finishes fast and then the sex is over.

He may finger me after but that doesnt work well since his fingers are short and chubby and he cant "hook" properly. Hes amazing at oral sex but it just feels good, i cant finish from it. When im alone it takes me a good 20-30 min with my finger to finish but he complains that sex in general is too tiring and he gives me head for like 3 min. What am i supposed to do with that?

I never gave head before and i learned that shit fast, i became great at it in those 2 times we saw each other and had sex. He always gets to finish and its creating resentment, it feels like hes so selfish.

Its even worse our libidos are naturally high and sometimes we end up having sex 3 times in a day and i dont get to finish.

I think me finishing is a lesser problem since those things just take practice and i know how to bring it up to him. But i cant exactly say "Hey, i dont feel a single thing when youre inside me since i get too wet and youre too small for me, its boring.".

Its frustrating waiting so long to have sex and then its shit. And we dont even get to practice other than every few months. I dont want to settle for a lifetime of mid sex.

We're compatible in literally everything else tho, morals, values, life plans, politics, way of life...we talked about it all. Its confusing to me how someone can be so caring and considerate in every other aspect of life. Sexual compatibility is still very important to me.

I dont want to hurt his feelings but it seems like he isnt thinking about mine during sex.

Salam everyone!

I have a question. I failed an important law exam even tho i made dua about it a lot and studied so much. To make it even worse, i had 9/20 and 10/20 is a pass.

How can i make this entire situation positive? Whats my lesson here?

Salam everyone!

I just came here to complain. I come from a christian family and im the first muslim.

My mother was raised in a christian household but in her adult years ive never seen her practice the religion, go to church or dress/act in a modest way. The only christian thing we do is celebrate Christmas and Easter but i always thought it was just tradition, i never gave it any meaning, even before i reverted.

Nobody in my family knows ive reverted, its been almost a year because they would never accept it and to be honest, im never in the mood for arguing with them since its pointless, their viewpoints wont change.

One day my mum found my Qur'an and fully freaked out. I was so shocked, it was such a reaction. Then she proceeded to say that this doesnt belong in her house and she wont tolerate it, she took my Qur'an and headed to the door to throw it away. Then i got up from my bed and stopped her, i was just trying to get to my book really but nobody was willing to let go of it so it resulted in a physical fight. What was i supposed to do? No way id let her throw away MY Qur'an i bought with my money.

Then she started calling me all sorts of names and even said "The people your age are having s*x and youre over here spending time in your room reading an ancient book." Okay and?? Good for me. Literally what? 😭

Like ohhh nooo, islam made me quit vaping, made me dress in a more modest way, showed me the right priorities and a bunch of other things and youre in my face complaining about not having intimacy. I was so ashamed those words could come out of a mothers mouth.

Then she decided not to talk to me for a full week as a "punishment" but it felt like heaven, finally some peace and quiet. Then a week later she snapped out of it and started talking like nothing happened.

My mother and i never had a close relationship, we kept it formal, minimal and surface based. Talking with her wont work so dont even try to mention that. She is one of those stubborn people and get her opinion on islam from the media.

This still left a pretty sour taste even tho in happened in april this year. It makes me sad ill have to hide my religion until i move out and ill never be accepted in my family and they will never be informed when i do my nikkah.

Like the title says, can a muslim woman be a feminist?

I know to a high degree islam puts focus on "this is a womans duty, this is a mans duty" and doesnt practice equality how the west knows it. I mean we are all equal but have different roles.

Being a feminist just seems like a human thing to be :/ How can someone say theyre not a feminist when it stands for having your own bank account, having the right to vote and get an education...

Also since in countries all over the world religion is separated from the law how else would we enforce the rights?

I know that the Qur'an grants women complete financial independence and individual property rights, women can also participate in politics (even tho modern democracy didnt exist 1400 years ago) and seek knowledge.

But just because i am muslim doesnt mean everyone else is and we need to have a seperate movement for it since islam is not a part of the law (in my country at least).

It makes me feel silly thinking im not a feminist because where would i be without it today?

Help a muslim revert out! Its still a tricky topic for me.

hello! i plan on moving to huddersfield in a few years so i was wondering how are things there, politics, transport, jobs, houses, gas and grocery prices. How much money do i need a month to live in comfort?

salam everyone!

i (21F) am a muslim revert and i plan on getting my nikkah done later this year with a man (29M) thats been in my life since july 2025.

the problem is, my family is very against islam and they dont know im muslim. if they found out i wouldnt have a support system and they wouldnt attend my nikkah or a civil wedding a few years later.

our "relationship" has not been halal from the start since i dont have a present father or uncle in my life so he only ever talked to me from my family. thats why we've been working on making it halal.

i live with my mother so its not as simple as "tell her youre muslim anyways, its your life", she will kick me out.

my question is, is it justified to have a "secret nikkah"? i am a grown woman capable of my own life choices? and i would get a wali from the mosque.

we were always big on keeping things simple and private so we wanted it to be intimate anyways.

for my mehr i asked for a 5g gold bar. i think its a good investment, gold is always worth it, its price keeps rising. i didnt want to go ask for something bigger since he just finished his university and i am still a student.

his family, of course, knows about me and asks him about me all the time.

we really want to get this done on our own, we dont want to sin anymore. its time to make this right, after a year (but i couldnt marry a total stranger so what were we supposed to do).

salam everyone!

i (21F) am a muslim revert and i plan on getting my nikkah done later this year with a man (29M) thats been in my life since july 2025.

the problem is, my family is very against islam and they dont know im muslim. if they found out i wouldnt have a support system and they wouldnt attend my nikkah or a civil wedding a few years later.

our "relationship" has not been halal from the start since i dont have a present father or uncle in my life so he only ever talked to me from my family. thats why we've been working on making it halal.

i live with my mother so its not as simple as "tell her youre muslim anyways, its your life", she will kick me out.

my question is, is it justified to have a "secret nikkah"? i am a grown woman capable of my own life choices? and i would get a wali from the mosque.

we were always big on keeping things simple and private so we wanted it to be intimate anyways.

for my mehr i asked for a 5g gold bar. i think its a good investment, gold is always worth it, its price keeps rising. i didnt want to go ask for something bigger since he just finished his university and i am still a student.

his family, of course, knows about me and asks him about me all the time.

we really want to get this done on our own, we dont want to sin anymore. its time to make this right, after a year (but i couldnt marry a total stranger so what were we supposed to do).

I (F21) reverted to islam a few months ago.

Going to the mosque alone always seems intimidating so i never went before but its been quite lonely on my journey since i have 0 muslims around me and my friends have a bad opinion about islam because of all the news about immigrants (they get most of their info from tik tok and instagram) which caused us to drift apart, now we usually avoid that topic.

Since we are grown people capable of doing our own research i never go out of my way to talk about islam to them or explain common misunderstandings, i keep religion as something private to me.

I really started to notice that gap in our mindsets in the last 8 months so i would love to find some genuine muslim friends in croatia :) It would be great if we spoke in croatian, bosnian, serbian but english is fine too.

I love everything about nature, hiking, photography, journaling, reading books, good coffee and modest fashion.

Bok svima :)

Planiram se iduce godine prebaciti iz Hrvatske u Mostar na fakultet pa me zanima:

•Koliko realno kosta zivot kao student u Mostaru?

•Kakve su sanse za dobivanje doma?

•Koliko je tesko naci studentski posao?

•Kakvi su ljudi, pronalaze li se lako drustva i cega sve ima tamo?