r/ThirtiesMumbai

It’s my birthday tonight, and somehow I’ve barely told anyone. Moved out of Mumbai two months back and back there birthdays somehow never felt this quiet. There was always someone to call, someone making plans etc.

Here in Kolkata, I barely know anyone. And tonight, I’m just sitting by myself, watching the day pass without really knowing what I’m supposed to feel.

I know birthdays are just another day. I know I shouldn’t expect people to remember a date I never even told them. But maybe that’s what makes it hurt a little more. You start wondering what it feels like to be missed. To have someone think of you without being reminded. To have someone say, “Hey, it’s your birthday,” and make you feel like your existence matters to them.

This might be one of the few birthdays in my life with no plans, no celebration and barely any wishes.

Just me, a strangely quiet night, and a little more loneliness than I expected.

I miss Mumbai tonight. I miss the noise. I miss the people. I miss feeling like I belonged somewhere.

Maybe growing up really is just learning how to sit with these quiet moments and pretend they don’t hurt.

Happy birthday to me, I guess. 🎂

PS: Thanks a lot everyone, this means sooo soo much to me

What will we do:

1. Get a few beers/cocktails & bar nibbles.

2. Just ease off over casual, fun or intellectual conversations.

Topics :

Ex-GF/BF

Boss

Fitness goals/Workouts

Career/life Goals

Where:

At an all day pub/bar in Navi Mumbai

Irish house/BSE/ Doolally - other recommendations welcome

Time:

Preferably 4:00 PM.

.

I tried to join the gym after my first baby delivery post a year since I had gained weight around my hips and waist. They started with zumba directly with feet hitting music, i got thrilled and never knew my knees hurted. I stopped and took treatment, been around 2 years now.should I join the gym again? Will it hit my legs if I avoid Zumba, need to loose my fat at my hips and waist to wear my favorite jeans again?...please

Aaj jo heartbreak hua hai na bhaisahabbbb, bahot d

saalo k baad hua aisa. Bahot bhura laga.

She says most couples are bored of each other and open it up and swing, im just taking a poll lol.

​

I (29M) have been going through a really tough time for the past 5-6 years. I never thought there could be such a huge difficulty in life, but in my mid 20s I had the fighting spirit to do things in my control and also having the hope that things will be better in future.

But things haven't got better and they only seem to be getting worse. And now I have lost all the fighting spirit and feel hopeless about my situation. I am not sure if this is particular to my situation, or something that many people experience in late 20s or 30s.

Someone who was attractive, seductive yesterday no longer appears or appeals the same way after a couple of weeks, months maybe.

I want to start speaking English need partner

I feel like anything happening to me is my mistake. I live with my family, i feel these beliefs come from there. Their way of caring is different. But i dont feel heard or seen the way i am. I acknowlege that there comes a lot of security and many things to be grateful about but at times i feel even more guilty coz of this.

I recently spoke to an old friend from my undergraduate days. Academically, I was always the more talented one between the two of us. Not bragging, just that I have had opportunity to study one of the best institutions in India. He eventually cleared BPSC and is now working as a Labour Officer.

We were casually talking about our lives and careers when he mentioned that he makes around ₹5 lakh per month from bribes over and above his salary.

I honestly didn't know how to react.

I'm currently pursuing a PhD in Economics. My stipend is ₹47,000 a month, and I've spent years studying, doing research, dealing with the uncertainty of academia, and worrying about what my career will look like after the PhD.

Then I hear someone I knew from college, whom I never considered particularly academically capable, casually saying that he's making ₹5 lakh a month through his government position.

Obviously, I understand that this is illegal and that there are risks involved.

But the conversation still left me with a strange feeling.

For a moment I genuinely wondered: Did I make the wrong career choices?

Is spending 5–6 years pursuing a PhD and trying to build a legitimate academic/research career worth it when people in certain government positions can apparently make multiples of a legitimate professional salary through corruption?

I'm not looking for moral lectures about corruption. I know it's illegal. I'm more interested in hearing from people who have faced similar comparisons in their own careers.

How do you deal psychologically with seeing people you once considered less capable become dramatically more financially successful than you? And how do you know whether you're actually on the right career path?