u/cantthinkofaname231

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I (29M) have been going through a really tough time for the past 5-6 years. I never thought there could be such a huge difficulty in life, but in my mid 20s I had the fighting spirit to do things in my control and also having the hope that things will be better in future.

But things haven't got better and they only seem to be getting worse. And now I have lost all the fighting spirit and feel hopeless about my situation. I am not sure if this is particular to my situation, or something that many people experience in late 20s or 30s.

I (29M) have been going through a really tough time for the past 5-6 years. I never thought there could be such a huge difficulty in life, but in my mid 20s I had the fighting spirit to do things in my control and also having the hope that things will be better in future.

But things haven't got better and they only seem to be getting worse. And now I have lost all the fighting spirit and feel hopeless about my situation. I am not sure if this is particular to my situation, or something that many people experience in late 20s or 30s.

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I don't know if this is the right sub for this, but most of the times I feel like I am on autopilot mode. I just end up surviving the day, doomscrolling and not doing much. I feel very distracted and unable to focus.

I have been going through an extremely tough time and there is very little I can do to change the situation. I have a tough time accepting what the future could hold, and it feels too bleak. Occasionally, I feel very hopeless. I think this hopelessness is there most of the times, but I just distract myself from it those times.

I feel too burnt out to make any changes, and its also because it feels like doing anything is pointless, because nothing will work. Still on some random days, I get a random surge of optimism and I just have this weird feeling that I will just push through any problem and destroy it. I set out plans to work on it, and feel inspired even though I know it won't address the problems directly. This keeps me motivated for some days, and I change my schedule a bit, but then I go back to square one.

I am not sure why I am posting this honestly. Any advice probably wouldn't be followed by me, just wanted to understand if any other person has gone/going through similar things.

I don't know if this is the right sub for this, but most of the times I feel like I am on autopilot mode. I just end up surviving the day, doomscrolling and not doing much. I feel very distracted and unable to focus.

I have been going through an extremely tough time and there is very little I can do to change the situation. I have a tough time accepting what the future could hold, and it feels too bleak. Occasionally, I feel very hopeless. I think this hopelessness is there most of the times, but I just distract myself from it those times.

I feel too burnt out to make any changes, and its also because it feels like doing anything is pointless, because nothing will work. Still on some random days, I get a random surge of optimism and I just have this weird feeling that I will just push through any problem and destroy it. I set out plans to work on it, and feel inspired even though I know it won't address the problems directly. This keeps me motivated for some days, and I change my schedule a bit, but then I go back to square one.

I am not sure why I am posting this honestly. Any advice probably wouldn't be followed by me, just wanted to understand if any other person has gone/going through similar things.

Traditionally, arrange marriage would be between children of family friends, or some relative would be the middleman between two families. In this scenario, there is trust between the parties involved because of the middleman/long standing friendship. You can be assured that the families are good. There are some checklist filters ofcourse, but trust is the major factor here.

The same cannot be said for matrimonial apps. There is no way to know if the person is lying or the background of the person. It is simply a checklist and the matching of checklists. It somehow gets the worst of both love and arrange marriage. Some people may fall in love with people they meet on matrimony apps, but since its all about checklists, love would take a backseat. And the trust factor is also kinda missing.

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u/cantthinkofaname231 also can't think of a title. But the user also knows what they're looking for. Or maybe not

A self proclaimed funny guy who is also a good listener and likes thinking about the deep stuff in life.

While I am always pondering about the purpose of life, I also tend to not take it too seriously and believe that ultimately we all die, so we can just enjoy it and do it the most till we're here.

Very introverted but not shy (Wdym only shy people look for partners on reddit, others get them irl). I like walking (what expensive petrol costs does to a man), watching cricket (yeah like every Indian guy isn't doing that), reading (if self help/spirituality counts), gaming.

Looking for someone who can keep up with my lame jokes and philosophical ramblings and cherish it instead of thinking "kaisa ajeeb aadmi hai yeh".

How has your experience been with trying to find someone though reddit? Compared to dating/matrimonial apps.

For me, nothing has really worked including reddit, though reddit has been the best of the lot. I have interacted with amazing people on reddit and even though it hasn't led to finding a partner, I could atleast develop some connections.

Dating apps have the default filter of good looks/photos and also the algo is so fucked up that for most men, finding a single match is a dream. Matrimony apps have other filters and its more transactional than actually about knowing the person.

Reddit has its own flaws though. People are less serious and more prone to be ghosted, then there are weird people, catfishes. Finding a genuine person, let alone a compatible one is a task in itself

Just venting here. It feels like there is no purpose to life. Its the same stuff on repeat and there is restlessness, anxiety and uncertainty. I wish there was more clarity to what I want, what's going to happen to me.

I end up just doomscrolling whenever I get any time. There's nothing to look forward to, there's no joy left in life. Ugh

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I (28M) have never been in a relationship. It didn't bother me till my mid 20s but for the last 1-2 years I have strongly started craving intimacy. It could be partially due to age, and partially because I am going through a really tough time and I kinda need someone to be there for me.

Dating apps haven't worked for me. Reddit worked a little bit and I went out with 2-3 girls on dates, but it all fizzled out without reaching anywhere.

The whole talking stage is very exhausting, specially because it reaches nowhere, but also a little bit exciting. It is almost addictive for me to approach new people and getting to know them, but I am already exhausted with life, and this exhausts me further. I need to let go of the need to be in a relationship and work towards improving my life even though many things in my life are not under my control.

Most of us don't really like arrange marriage in the traditional way. It sounds very scary.

But on the other hand, we don't have an appropriate dating culture where you can go out and ask people if they would like to hang out with you. If you do get in a relationship, you have to hide it from your parents until you are ready to marry. This makes it difficult to meet more people.

The only option left is online dating which is filled with men and rarely any women. This creates problems for both guys and girls

Most of us don't really like arrange marriage in the traditional way. It sounds very scary.

But on the other hand, we don't have an appropriate dating culture where you can go out and ask people if they would like to hang out with you. If you do get in a relationship, you have to hide it from your parents until you are ready to marry. This makes it difficult to meet more people.

The only option left is online dating which is filled with men and rarely any women. This creates problems for both guys and girls

I will be 29 soon, and I have never been in a relationship. As a teenager,I was extremely shy and kinda depressed. Never had the courage to approach anyone, nor had the energy to keep things going.

Over time, I became a better person, and I am not shy now and also not depressed. I have become very empathetic and a good listener. Also worked on my sense of humour. I do admit that I haven't been able to do great in my career, but its still good enough for myself. I have also become healthier.

The problem is that I don't really have anyone in life with whom I can develop something. As an introvert, i prefer doing most things alone. Dating apps didn't really work. There are not many ways in which I can showcase my way of thinking and humour to anyone. In school/college it was a lot easier, but I was too shy.

Also, this advice of focus on yourself almost implies that you're not good enough for love. I'm sure if I had a lot more opportunities, atleast someone would have liked me, regardless of what I have achieved.

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I like contemplating about life but I also believe that life shouldn't be taken too seriously. We are all going to die anyway, so why stress so much?

Would like to connect with someone who understands this perspective. I also consider myself to be a good listener, so don't mind listening to some rants, though I also have a lot of content to rant, so be prepared for it.

I am very spiritual though I am not religious. I like to walk, listening to music, gaming, reading a bit. I like to contemplate about life a lot and often find myself wondering about the purpose of life.

Please don't be a dry texter. I don't know much about what to write here, you can go through my posts and maybe get to know me more as a person. See ya.

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I like contemplating about life but I also believe that life shouldn't be taken too seriously. We are all going to die anyway, so why stress so much?

Would like to connect with someone who understands this perspective. I also consider myself to be a good listener, so don't mind listening to some rants, though I also have a lot of content to rant, so be prepared for it.

Please don't be a dry texter. I don't know much about what to write here, you can go through my posts and maybe get to know me more as a person. See ya.

​

I like contemplating about life but I also believe that life shouldn't be taken too seriously. We are all going to die anyway, so why stress so much?

Would like to connect with someone who understands this perspective. I also consider myself to be a good listener, so don't mind listening to some rants, though I also have a lot of content to rant, so be prepared for it.

Please don't be a dry texter. I don't know much about what to write here, you can go through my posts and maybe get to know me more as a person. See ya.

The belief that "if you do good, good things will happen to you" doesn't seem true when you consider that morality and success don't have any correlation. To get success, you may have to do certain things, and being a good person may or may not have anything to do it.

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In some cases, being good may even become a hindrance to success, because you have to give up on some potential opportunities towards success.

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Good things majorly happen because of two reasons: efforts and luck. Someone may behave like an asshole towards others, but still put in efforts for what they want.

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Luck, by definition is random. It may favour "good people" or "bad people" or lazy or hardworking people. Majority of what happens to us is a result of luck, and there is no evidence that points towards the fact that it favours those who do good.

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I like contemplating about life but I also believe that life shouldn't be taken too seriously. We are all going to die anyway, so why stress so much?

Would like to connect with someone who understands this perspective. I also consider myself to be a good listener, so don't mind listening to some rants, though I also have a lot of content to rant, so be prepared for it.

Please don't be a dry texter. I don't know much about what to write here, you can go through my posts and maybe get to know me more as a person. See ya.

​

I like contemplating about life but I also believe that life shouldn't be taken too seriously. We are all going to die anyway, so why stress so much?

Would like to connect with someone who understands this perspective. I also consider myself to be a good listener, so don't mind listening to some rants, though I also have a lot of content to rant, so be prepared for it.

Please don't be a dry texter. I don't know much about what to write here, you can go through my posts and maybe get to know me more as a person. See ya.

​

I like contemplating about life but I also believe that life shouldn't be taken too seriously. We are all going to die anyway, so why stress so much?

Would like to connect with someone who understands this perspective. I also consider myself to be a good listener, so don't mind listening to some rants, though I also have a lot of content to rant, so be prepared for it.

Please don't be a dry texter. I don't know much about what to write here, you can go through my posts and maybe get to know me more as a person. See ya.

​

I like contemplating about life but I also believe that life shouldn't be taken too seriously. We are all going to die anyway, so why stress so much?

Would like to connect with someone who understands this perspective. I also consider myself to be a good listener, so don't mind listening to some rants, though I also have a lot of content to rant, so be prepared for it.

Please don't be a dry texter. I don't know much about what to write here, you can go through my posts and maybe get to know me more as a person. See ya.