r/tryingtoconceive

After an emotionally tumultuous 3 years of TTC, this month felt a bit different. I had all the early pregnancy symptoms and allowed myself to flirt with the idea that this might be it. Finally. And then I got my period. It feels so exhausting to go through this month after month. Some days I just feel like I can’t go on. The pain of trying to be a mother is too much to bear sometimes and yet I can’t stop wanting it.

I need to vent and maybe get others opinions. My husband and I have been TTC for some years now and found out my husband was infertile from TRT.. he got on medication and stuff last May. By October he had sperm.

My “bestfriend” knew ALL about this process. Knew we were seeing a fertility clinic for the past year, knew my husband was on injections 5x a week, knew that I was tracking ovulation, knew that I was taking vitamins, knew my husbands sperm analysis, etc. A VERY CLEAR knowledge that we are trying to have a baby.

WELL, in the beginning of the year she asked what vitamins my husband was taking because her husband had a bad analysis. I sent the ones and guess what? 3 months later, she’s pregnant. I’ve been sent her line progression, things about her morning sickness, tiredness, and just last week ultrasounds.

Today, I shared with her that we are moving into a medicated and monitored cycle and that they said about the risk of multiples and about how my husband lowkey got excited for twins. HERES THE PROBLEM, her response was “are you guys trying to have a baby or what’s the plan?”

……maybe I’m overreacting. I havent even answered

My partner and I were planning to start TTC in the Fall. However, we both have a significant amount of vacation time and are thinking of doing a trip to SE Asia over Christmas.

Would you put off trying until after the trip? Additionally, I read mixed information about waiting 90 days prior to traveling this region of the world due to zika virus. Meaning we would be pushing the timeline back about 6 months (we are 31 and 34)

Curious what others know/have done regarding this wait period. Some articles say it’s a must, and others say it’s not necessary. Appreciate any insight or experiences

I'm a thirty year old female who just experienced my first pregnancy loss (right around six weeks). I've always had a regular cycle of around 26 days, and generally ovulate later in my cycle. This means that I usually only have a luteal phase of 11-12 days. I typically spot a little bit the day before my period starts.

All of this to say, I'm worried about low progesterone and am so scared to try to get pregnant again in case low progesterone causes another loss. Anybody have similar circumstances? Did your doctor prescribe progesterone? Have I gone down a self-diagnosis rabbit hole?

Thank you!

It took my husband (39M) 2-3 years to finally get on board with TTC. I'd been asking him when he wants to have kids for the past few years, and every time he said it's up to me.

Until I finally exploded 3 months ago and told him I really want kids, and that we need to start trying or just never have kids. Cycles came and went (work commitments and life got in the way) and we finally started TTC this month.

I know it's only our 1st cycle trying... But I'm just so impatient for it to happen because I've waited so long to even start.

We have both gained weight steadily since COVID-19 hit... So I wouldn't say our fitness is ideal.

What can I expect as someone in her mid-thirties with BMI36 (cycle of 26-34 days because of varying stress levels at work - avg 30 days) who's hoping for baby dust?

This isn’t fun.

When I learned that it’s normal to take up to a year to conceive, but “most couples conceive within 2-3 months” according to multiple sources I used, it gets discouraging really fast. I had a feeling this was going to be rough from the start solely because I feel like I’ve never had anything go how I wanted in life.

I’m in my late 20s and my husband is in his early 30s. We’re both healthy with no underlying issues known. My husband was honestly pretty ignorant of how this process works after I told him what I researched before we started this journey. I don’t think he believed the possibility of it being difficult until he actually went through with it.

I feel resentful as well because I always wanted a big family and he knew this. He was constantly pushing off when to start trying, and I really don’t know why. It was just like random excuses for why we couldn’t have a child even after we were married “we just got married,” “we don’t live in a good area,” “we just need to wait.” It caused so much stress knowing time was slipping by. He kept changing when he was okay saying “it’s up to you,” “after the honeymoon,” “after we move” “by the end of the year,” “by your birthday.” Then one day he just randomly decided he was ready.

I wasn’t trying to be pushy but when you tell me you want kids and how you value family, it feels weird not to be in the same excitement I had to start a family. I don’t understand why he did this. He’s a good man and I have no problems with him, but I always thought this behavior was odd. I can only think maybe he was nervous, but that’s still strange to me.

He’s done an at-home sperm analysis and that was good. I got bloodwork done which came back normal. I’m thinking of getting my hormones checked despite not having any physical symptoms of an imbalance. It’s very confusing when things I read are telling me it shouldn’t be an issue to conceive when my periods are regular and not painful. I don’t want to wait a year to get checked out. I don’t know where to start though.

I was just met with my period after the dreadfully long two week wait. Despite the disappointment and sadness I’m still getting used to feeling, this is the first nearly painless period I’ve ever had, and I think it’s because I took progesterone this cycle, a side effect I didn’t expect. A tiny silver lining among the TTC clouds.

And here we go again, hoping next month is the month. 🩵

Hi all,
I’m F 28 partner is M 33
I guess I’m seeking some reassurance. My partner and I have been trying to conceive for close to the 11 month mark. We decided to see a naturopath who has recommended to go on a detox cleanse and not try to conceive during this time for the next 2 months. I feel like time is of the essence and pushing back is wasting time but my partner sees it as bettering our health. I have regular periods - nothing of concern and am ovulating. He can make some improvements in regards to his sperm. He has some liver / kidney problems to work on and I have slight cholesterol.
Am i being crazy in thinking 2 months is a massive setback? Ahh…
Also - should I just axe the naturopath and go straight to doctors!? Even that has me a bit 🥴🥴

Hello! We are trying to conceive a baby and are looking for reviews on the Oura Ring. If you have any pros and cons or any information about the Oura Ring, please let me know !

Hi I and my husband both are 33
My amh in jan was 1.09 and in may last week if came 0.75
My husband report is as follows
Sperm concentration- 12million/ml
Motility 36% in which rapid progression is 2 percent
Slow progression is 19 % and non progressive is 15 %
Immotile 64%
Normal forms 2%

We went to a doctor in Bangalore in a famous hospital. She has told us to go for IVF she is an IVF expert. One of the top most doctor here.

Shes saying otherwise we only have 8-10 % of chances.

My other things are normal.

I have also visited another famous hospital where the top doctor also knew the doctor we are going to.

We are scared and not able to understand what to do next.
Please help.

I got a faint line on a test on the 15th, same for 2 more tests the next day of a different brand. Since they were all faint but still clearly visible i thought let me wait a few more days and take a digital one so I can take a cute photo with it. Well today I took 2 tests and they were both very negative. The digital test made me so confused I used the other line test one that was in the box. I was freaking out all day and was talking to my sister. She said maybe I was too hydrated from the day before and that its normal to get both positive and negative results early on and to wait for my appointment on the first.

I guess i was just so excited. I've felt nauseous a few times over the last few days and I have no signs of my period which should have come the 14th. I guess I just needed somewhere to post this because aside from my sister I have nowhere to talk about this. My husband and I have both had a cold for the last few days, so I guess it could be that? But it doesn't feel right, you know? It feels separate and UGH. I'm in the land of In-Between right now and I hate it. I just need my appointment to come sooner so I can know 100% what's going on (im leaving to visit family for 10 days)

Hi all! I (33F) and my husband (33M) started TTC in March of this year. We are only two months in and I am pretty happy with the level of patience I am having with the process so far. We are planning to skip two months of TTC, one month because my due date would be within a few days of my best friend's wedding (this is a me decision, she is supportive of me trying even if it presents that risk - feel like that's worth clarifying) and the next month because we will likely be away from each other for about a week when I am expecting to ovulate (we will try before and after in case I am off) so I do feel a bit of impatience starting to set in.

The first month I said eff it let's have fun, we were on our honeymoon so we just said lets not-not try but I was tracking my fertility window so I had a sense in the back of my mind that we were definitely hitting the right days with the frequency that we were "not-not" trying. I became convinced I was pregnant because on our way home the airline attendant asked if I was pregnant at check in (which has never happened to me before as a pretty frequent flyer...) I thought she was one of those people who has a sixth sense. And my period was late. But alas.

Second month I said ok let's have a little better sense of whats going on than my apple health app, bought the premom ovulation tests. I am someone who feels dehydrated very quickly and whether it was related to my water intake or something else, I saw the surge start right around when my health app suggested but never saw the line as dark as control. we tried as if the surge had happened accordingly.

So now that I am looking ahead to two months of not trying, I am debating whether to get a more robust testing method either Inito or a BBT thermometer/system. I told myself I would wait to, in my mind, "buy into" the consumerism of TTC until we had been trying for longer.

For anyone who has been at this longer and is using more sophisticated testing than premom test strips, did you make these investments early in the process? Did you wait longer, and if so, do you feel like that was the right move? Would love to get some perspective from others. I am getting spammed by inito targeted ads and feel so conflicted!

I have done some research on the best prenatal and it looks like all of them are a huge pill. Does anyone have a gummy that’s equally as good or is there a prenatal that’s not huge?! I’m so concerned with swallowing big pills

So after my period being late for 4 days,being to scared to test and get a neg,it just came and I have so many emotions rn. After trying for years and currently seeing a specialist, I honestly hate how I feel. I hate how everyone around me are getting pregnant without even trying. On their 5th or 6th child. I hate how I’ve started hating everyone that can conceive so easily. I hate how I hate everyone rn. Honestly just needed to vent cuz I’m heavy on the why me rn 😞

Hey all,

How do you go about making the best of the waiting for your "yes"? Yet another person I am close to just told us they're pregnant. I'm so excited for them, but man it's a little like a slap in the face. I should be holding my baby in about a week, but unfortunately I am now waiting for a rainbow instead. Any advice?

It’s official, I’m the problem. All husband’s tests come back great, doctor has no concerns on his end. I had a Saline HSG where they found a right sided hydrosalpinx, we are doing a traditional HSG with contrast to confirm after beginning my next cycle. After doing some research I’m seeing the most common form of treatment is removing the affected tube. I’m at the point where every test leads to a new problem or a way to prolong this process. Now knowing I’m the issue is mentally draining and discouraging. If you have had a salpingectomy, how long from diagnosis to surgery? And how long after surgery are you able to begin trying again?

I will continue to shout this to the rooftops! So many doctors never consider endometriosis for the cause of fertility issues. Endometriosis affects 1 in 10 women but it is EXTREMELY under diagnosed. I’m guessing 1 in 8 women have it (Australia says 1 in 7).

Endometriosis doesn’t only cause painful periods, but it can cause GI issues, fatigue, infertility, painful intercourse, non-period pain in your pelvis/lower back/hips, painful urination, painful bowel movements, and so much more.

If your doctor ever says endometriosis does not cause fertility issues, drop them ASAP!

Gold standard to diagnose endo is undergoing a laparoscopic endometriosis excision surgery with a specialist. Sometimes (not always) more advanced endo can be seen on ultrasound/MRI, but silent endo will not be seen on ultrasound. I was diagnosed with stage 3 endo after three early miscarriages, a specific cyst on my ovary, and undergoing a Receptiva test.

All of my friends have conceived very quickly after getting married. They tell me to be grateful that I’m not pregnant and to enjoy the time when it’s just me and my husband. It honestly pisses me off!

I’ve been hyper focused on all my symptoms and convincing myself that this is the month we will conceive but my period always comes right on time. I wish I knew that it wasn’t so easy to get pregnant when I got married. It’s been comforting to see other people’s stories to know I’m not the only one who is struggling since everyone I’m around conceived so fast.

It’s so hard to be patient 😭