Thanks for those who commented on my earlier post.

Oil sex anyone? : r/Swingers

We got in touch with a couple that we had met before. They had done oil wrestling - sex between themselves but never tried it in a 4some swinging context. She told us that they have tried both coconut oil and nuru and coconut oil can cause vaginal irritation in some women. It can also compromise the latex condoms. While they would try it with each other, if it is swinging and 4 people playing then nuru gel is the way to go.

We went to their place and used a grappling mat which was in their garage.

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They had prepared a lot of Nuru oil for us and it was already mixed when we arrived. We had a tag team match up where my wife and I were going against them. We started by oiling up our wives with it and then we grappled on it a bit.

The other wife is athletic but toned and petite. I could easily dominate her but the goal is not to win but to have fun. My wife on the other hand is thick and sturdy and it is not flab. Pure solid flesh! She can give most men a hard time on the mat and she demolished him.

His wife then joined in to save him from her and it was pure 45 minute of slippery body-t0-body silliness. We got very sweaty since this was garage and the raw carnal energy was quite arousing. I had to pin my wife down and then he had his way with her and then my wife pinned me down so that his wife could dominate me.

Condoms came off and we fucked our own wives in sweaty, somewhat stinking, dirty animalistic sex.

It was definitely one of the best sessions we have ever had in about two years of swinging. We hope to find more couples to play in the VA area.

Some tips:

If you wish to try this ...

a) Skip the coconut oil and go with Nuru.

b) Start slow and then pick up pace. Forget about arousal and let competitiveness take over slowly. Attempts to win result in arousal so let it happen.

c) Condoms slips and shifts sometimes if your cock is too slippery so before putting on a condom, you might want to dry yourself a bit.

d) Ultimately, you may enjoy your own partner in the end because condoms become an annoyance and unprotected sex is more spontaneous. In our case, we use condoms with everyone else but go naked with each other so I fucked and came in my wife but ... to each their own.

e) Invest in those mats because wrestling needs a bit of firm yet soft surface area and blankets on bed are not practical. bed does not give enough wrestle space and blanket on the hard floor does not give enough cushioning to wrestle without hurting yourself.

Wrestling mats ... rolling types!

Please post your experience if you ever try it.

I signed up for wrestling when I was in my mid teens. I was scrawny but I wanted to prove to myself that I was not a boy anymore and that is the age when boys do things to prove that they are all grown up an manly etc. I started wrestling.

After eight months only, my coach took me and a few others to this "Open Weights Invitational." Some weight divisions were mixed gender and there was one Chinese girl who looked intimidating. She was toned. almost built like an action figure. I got a bit intimidated because if I went against her, I knew she would wreck me.

This was a very discomforting thought because back in the day, there was a stigma losing to a "girl" no matter how experienced she was. You were supposed to win just because you were a boy. Furthermore, this was a hostile crowd because some of the guys sitting on the bleachers were bullies. I knew I would get bullied if they saw me lose to her. I wished I did not end up facing that Chinese girl because I had seen her go against another girl and I knew what she could do.

There was another girl with reddish brown hair in braids in a pink and white zippered track top. She looked like she was new. From the track top that she wore, she did not look very chiseled or athletic. Big boobs, innocent face. I thought I may ask her out later provided I do not end up getting humiliated by that Chinese girl.

They both ended up in my bracket. The girl with braids, took off her track top and started warming up. I was like holy fuck! She was built sturdy. Not chiseled but solid curves and the way she was pacing sideways during the warm up was like she knew what she was doing.

I saw them go at each other and the pretty one with braids got behind the Chinese girl. She wrapped her arms around her torso and lifted her completely off the mats. Then she arched backwards and reverse slammed the Chinese girl on the back of her head with such athletic precision that everyone went silent. Chinese girl did not last that long. Totally one sided.

She had moved up after that and the guy she was facing chickened out. He probably saw what she did to the Chinese girl and decided he does not want to get wrecked. I saw the board update and saw my name slotted against her. They just pushed me up in his place. I thought if I backed out, everyone would know that these guys are all chickening out. I did not have the bail-out button because one fellow had already pressed it before me.

It was at that moment I found out who she was. A name pretty well known in those circles because she has won regional medals in women's as well as all open division. I was nervous and shaking. It is like stage fight where you are afraid of so many eyes on you no matter what you do but this is public beating on top of that.

My coach came and started giving me advice that I was not even listening to. He said you are stronger than her. Match her height and keep your head leveled with hers. If she drops low, you drop low. And do not let het get behind you or it is over. As long as you do two things, it is your strength against hers. I was nodding my head without even registering any of it.

When I ended up on the mat I was still shaking. But when we went at each other, I realized the coach was right. I had some strength advantage over her and I could push and move her back. I did quite well with only 8 months of training against someone who had been doing this for seven years!

But then I made the mistake my coach had told me not to make. She dropped low and I could not drop to her level fast enough since I was taller. Within seconds she slipped under and had the side of her face pressed against my chest. I remember feeling her arms wrapping around my waist and she had that "Anaconda" hug.

Next thing I recall vividly is that my world tilted! Yup I am seeing the world sideways. She lifted me up. It was not even a struggle. It was effortless relocation of my entire body. She slammed me and dropped her angled upper body on me at that exactly that time. It literally felt like I had been thrown from 4 feet down and the moment I landed, a 135 lbs woman landed on me!

I had the air knocked out of me. The crowd roared wild and I was feeling like I was going to break down and cry. Anyways, we were back on feet and I was mentally shaken up and focusing on coping with it. My mind was not there after that slam.

She got behind me and that was my second mistake. I felt her heavy weight press into my back from behind. Her arms snaked around from behind me and hugged me into a very uncomfortable "vice" like hug. We moved all over the mat like that for a bit. The moment I stopped, I felt her sweaty quads plant firmly and then she surged upwards and backwards at the same time. For a second I was a ragdoll my feet dangling freely under me and then she arched her back and slammed me exactly the way she had done to the Chinese girl.

I was not physically hurt but I wanted to cry. People were cheering for her even though I was the underdog. I remember the smell of her shampoo and her dead weight resting on me. She was putting all the upper body weight on me and I could not push her off nor slide out from beneath. She suffocated my will. I was fighting to hold my tears as the ref as counting the pin.

Anyways. When it was over, we got up. I gave her a half hug and she said something like "good job!" After that I went into the locker room, locked myself up and broke down. I cried in self hate and humiliation.

Then the bullying began. Word went around that I had lost to a "girl" and the fact that she was a very experienced athlete, and I was the underdog was never taken into consideration. Kids can be really mean and there were a few who drove me to the point of suicide. I quit wrestling after that loss and tried to hurt myself . Then went into depression.

My parents got divorced, my dad died, my mom married a jerk and I had a lot of "self hate."

I ran into my coach once and he asked me what happened to you. I told him exactly what happened on the mat that day. He said "I want you to remember how you felt that day when she made you cry. Never let go of that feeling. Store it in your memory and never ever forget how you felt. Every time you feel this pain and hurt, come on the mat and train so that you will never allow anyone to do this to you again."

I was like okay. Instead of killing myself I brought myself on the mat and killed my self on the mat every day. We moved to a different city and I got into BJJ and MMA. I won medals. But I never forgot the smell of her shampoo and how I cried.

Then I got married and had a son but the marriage lasted four years. We divorced and went our separate ways. I got my son into wrestling and started taking him to a kids camp. I would drop him there at the front desk and go and workout in the gym which was in the same building. Then I would pick him up. A few weeks after signing him up I wanted to see him train. I sat in the parents seating area and when his coach stepped on the mat, I recognized HER!

There she was coaching my kid. She was the woman who MADE me whatever I was today and she was ... beautiful. After the class, I went up to her, introduced myself and told her that she wrecked me once during the Open Weights Invitational after she had dismantled a Chinese girl. It took her a bit of time but she remembered. She said "Oh yes! Oh my God you have changed!"

She was into jocks and we clicked. I asked her out and we dated. Then we got married. I physically carried her and no ... I did not slam her!!! We have been together for 11 years now. We have had our ups and downs and a miscarriage. But I love her.

I told her that that loss made me strong and whatever I am it is because of that. But ... I never told her that I cried after it and that I attempted to hurt myself. That part she does not know.

My elder brothers wife has been in our family longer than my wife because he got married early. She is a tom boy. She can fit into any male gathering and be "one of the guys." She grew up with four brothers so she is not very reserved. She does not mean ill, its just that she sometimes does not have a filter.

She once said, "You have a nice body dude! What do you do? Bench press?" I said "Yes." She asked "How much?" I told her 225 for reps. She said, "Good. Keep going."

I never really thought much about it because knowing the type she is probably talks to her brothers like that. My wife and her have this unspoken negative chemistry.

To put things in perspective, my wife is a white convert married into a Pakistani family. Unlike my sister in law, my wife is very "male conscious" even though she is from a culture that allows people to be more relaxed with opposite gender. When she is around men, she will be exaggeratedly polite but equally formal and that causes men to mirror that. Men start acting formally around her too.

Two different personality types.

I got a suit custom stitched for me. I put it on with a tie that my wife gave. I asked everyone how it looked? Sis-in-law says "It is good but you are not the suit type." I was like why??? She said, "Well you have a nice body and the coat is concealing that. It is your most striking feature dude!" Then she said to my wife, "If I was you, I'd keep him in a t-shirt!" Then she walked away.

My wife was very offended. She said "that is inappropriate and now I need to say something!" I told her chillax. She is like a sister. She is my "sister" in law. Wife said "She needs to know how to act one." She insisted that she either talks to her or we leave.

We left early. Everyone could tell that we argued but no one knew what caused the argument.

I do acknowledge that it was a silly and an "unfiltered" thing to say. But I do not believe my sister-in-law has a crush on me. No! no! no! My wife says that she is not a loyal woman and she thinks that she is cheating on my brother. She says a woman who is a "tom boy" will not dress up in feminine looking dresses, wear a ton of make up and then start behaving like one of the "dudes." She likes other mens eyes on her and these unfiltered comments are her way of distributing "business cards" around that say "I am available, if you get the hint."

I told her that can never be true because she comes from a very good family and if she meant anything by that comment she would not say it to me while my wife is standing next to her. It would have been discreet. My wife says that I am too stupid to see what is going on and you follow her around, you will see that other men are not as dumb and naive as you.

I really do not know what to think anymore because it is causing mental fatigue like "just let it go!" and get back to being family again.

I have a question, primarily for the wives but all input would be appreciated. I am happily married to my lovely wife and we have a great marriage. There are certain things I have not shared with her and I am not sure if I should?

In my mid teens, I joined the wrestling team. I used to be skinny and that is the age when boys are trying to prove to themselves that they are men. My wife was the same age as me (well a few months younger actually) and had been wrestling since she was 11 and did gymnastics before that.

During one of the practice sessions, I was paired against her and it became obvious to me that she was the better athlete. After that, I started to stay away from her because kids can be jerks when they see another lose to a "girl." A lot of bullying can follow. She was the nicest girls in the team and if it was just me and the coach and her then I would have problems being dominated on the mat but some of the other kids there were bullies. I did not want to give them any ammo to bully me for losing to a "gal."

Her and I got paired up at a meet up. It was "All Weights Invitational" and was my first tournament. She was in my bracket and I started creating excuses because people were sitting on the bleachers and I was nervous as it. Furthermore I knew she would dismantle me and nowaways it is really not a big deal because we have a lot of boys and girls who wrestle together and have a good time on the mat but back in the day you would get bullied, Furthermore I had my bullies sitting there and I knew they would smell blood.

My coach sensed my hesitation and came up to me and said that if you are afraid of losing then you will never win and if you care about what the spectators will think you will never step on the mat. You decide!

So I went up there and I ended up against my wife. And I did pretty well against her. Honestly I did. But she got behind me I felt her plant those powerful, sweat-slicked quads and surge upward. For a terrifying second, I was a 145-pound ragdoll, my feet dangling uselessly in the air while she arched back and then, the world flipped upside down. She slammed me like backwards.

Coach was not shocked. Team mates expected it would happen sooner or later. I was the underdog but the spectators did not know that. They see a man and a woman and assume the girl to be an underdog which she was not. They started cheering and it was such a roar that I did not want to be there.

After that, my mind was not there. I was under her and she relaxed her body on me like a dead weight and I could not push her away. She didn't just pin me but suffocated my will. People were cheering and two only two people who realized that I did well was the coach and her.

I was quite demoralized because of the applause and some people among the spectators started being jerks right away and I knew what was coming. I would have been proud of giving her a tough time but the audience pressure and some bullies took that away.

When I was sitting by myself almost looking like I would cry coach said "You did great!" Then she came over and said "You have improved so much dude." I felt better and went home.

Next day bullying began. Some kids can be so mean that they can make you feel bad over nothing. The word went around that I had lost to a "girl" and everyone was coming to me to confirm that. My wife was not in my school so no one knew that she was quite accomplished and I was not the only "guy" she could dismantle. She had wiped the floor with many "guys" over the years but its just that they did not get bullied for it.

I quit wrestling. Dad passed away. Mom remarried. Step father was a jerk. I went into depression. The wrestling coach had an accident and became paralyzed from waist down. When I went to meet him he asked me why I quit. I told him that was such a public humiliation. He goes, "No it was not. They are just a bunch of bullies." He told me that if I felt that way then I need to be in touch with those feelings of humiliation and whenever I feel those emotions, I should get on the mat and train harder to ensure that no one would "humiliate" me like that again.

I got back into wrestling and this time I was bigger. I was in a different town so my wife was no where in sight. We never met. But I trained and trained and then got into BJJ and MMA and got 200 lbs so I did not have the post puberty hang ups.

When I ran into my wife again she was a kids coach and we knew each other from the past. She always liked athletic dudes and deep down inside I respected her so there was an instant attraction. We got married and I have loved her like nuts all these years. We have had out moments just like every other couple and we had a miscarriage but in the end, I do love her a lot.

In all these years of marriage, I never told her that the way she body slammed be and then rag dolled me led to a total moral collapse. The bullying that followed made me suicidal. A lot of kids kill themselves and to be honest, I considered that.

But had that not happened, I would be a skinny dude who would probably become a drug addict due to the life that came later. That public dismantling served as the "never allow that to happen" motivation for whatever I am. I always had a secret crush my wife because I thought she was hot. When the woman you secretly like, dismantles you then ya you will become a man.

She still does not know that she turned me into the man she loves today. She made me. But she does not know that. In all these years that we have been married, I have looked at her with some weird gratitude but never had the GUTS to tell her. To make her sit down and open up to why I secretly admire her so much would require me to open up a lot of old wounds.

Should I? Or let it go?

I am wondering how to do this? She wants to try it with full body oils like the way they have in nuru massages. Does anyone have any recommendations on which oils to get? Are there any flavored ones? Lastly, how do you manage the mess once the play is over? Bed sheets and all?

Wife wanted to experience her first DP but as a couple that has not even experienced anal, we attempted that first. Even though I am not exceptionally large, she is very tight and it is discomforting more than pleasurable at this point. We try until it gets uncomfortable and then proceed to vaginal sex.

During the "prep" phase for her first DP, she expressed an interest in taking two at the same time. DVP! Somehow the idea of being sandwiched between two male bodies is very arousing to her as she says and thinks that DVP is less challenging since vaginas get a pounding all the time.

I am reaching out to those who have experience, as a man, how does DVP feel? It would be cock against cock so you are being simulated more by another mans cock? Not that I have issues with that but how about the rhythm? Both go in and both come out or in out in out?

Have you experienced two male ejaculations inside the vagina?

I would like to hear from those who are experienced in DVP, what does it feel like for both the men and the woman? Would a female find it more simulating vaginally or is it the attention of two men that makes it pleasurable?

All thoughts and opinions appreciated at this point.

Current President of Pakistan, Asif Ali Zardari used to be my neighbor before he got into politics. He was a feudal landlord who had a house in Karachi called "Zardari House." This house stood next to Avari Towers.

I was 12 and used to play cricket on the street across from it. We knew nothing about Zardari except that he was a rich man who had a horse stable in that house. Occasionally, the ball would go over the wall and end up in his lawn. All we needed to do was to knock on the steel gate and guards armed with AK 47 rifles would open up the gate and let us in. Zardari would never be there.

There were a two times when I went in there and saw a woman. The first time was when she was getting down an SUV and the second time was when she was getting back no the SUV on a different day. She would always have her face veiled but the veil was so thin, that it was almost transparent. We could easily recognize her if we came across her without the veil.

We were a bit afraid of her because she was not friendly. She never said anything but had that disapproving gaze when she looked at us like "why are you here???" It seemed that she was annoyed with kids banging on the steel door almost every second day to get a cricket ball. Every time I went in there, I would scan the parameter to see if she was around because she was quite an unwelcoming presence, unlike the armed guards with AK 47 rifles.

Then one day I was batting and I hit the ball. It went well over the wall and landed quite far away. This ball belonged to a guy named "Zeeshan" who was the same age as me. He was quite upset that I lost his ball and said that next time, I should bring a ball because we have already lost a few of his. I told him not to worry as I will find it.

It was getting dark and the game had to be stopped because by the time that ball would be discovered, it would be too dark to play on the road. The whole cricket team scattered away and I went to knock on the steel door. The guys with AK 47 rifles let us in.

The ball was nowhere to be found. I searched the whole front yard, then the area near the stables but no sign. Finally it had gone too dark to find it and I was thinking I will let these guys know that I will come in the day light tomorrow.

Suddenly, a light at the back of the house lit up. I turned instinctively and saw the ball in the back yard of the house not the front. No one had ever hit the ball that far so feeling proud of myself I went to pick it up.

As I crossed into the back yards I saw that woman. I knew it was her because I had seen that face twice through the veil. This time, she was wearing a black bra and her traditional shalwar (baggy trousers) were quite low on her hips.

I had never seen a woman exposed like that because this was General Zia's Pakistan, and we could not have seen such a sight even on TV! I froze! Yup I literally froze. The bra was quite a low cut and there was a lot of boobage on display. I could never have imagined that she had a figure like that! My eyes just froze at that sight.

She was not at all surprised by that look and asked if I had come for the ball? I said yes. She said it is there. I turned around and got the ball. This time, I did not have the guts to look at her so I walked with my eyes lowered but I knew she was looking at me.

Then she called me to her and I went. There she was standing in front of me in all her majestic glory and I made no attempt to even conceal my gaze. She allowed me to look and then said "Aurat nahee dekhi kia?" (Never saw a woman before?) This time she was not rude.

I said yes and I said no and then yes. She asked me how old I was. I told her 12. She goes, "You look older than that. Come back after four years and then I will show you."

She just turned around and went back in.

After that every time the ball went into their house I would always volunteer to go. But I never saw her after that. I have no idea who she was and why she vanished. All I recall is that she was beautiful. It has been decades and I remember every inch of her. The flat stomach, the perfect hour glass figure, the inward curving waistline that went in narrow and then curved outwards to her hips.

My first thought was "Wow! Women are built like that???" I felt so stupid of feeling scared of her. She had the body that would make any male "brave."

Then Zardari married Benazir who would become the Prime Minister of Pakistan. I somehow knew that I would never see her again. In all these years I have thought about her, who she was, what happened to her and where she went.

When I went to Pakistan I visited Karachi and all the places where I grew up. Zardari House is still there but it has a new owner. It is not called "Sommerset House" I think. It made me think of her and I just wish life was kind to her.

I just feel wherever she is she is happy. I have no idea why but I really wish life has been kind towards her.

I was raised by a woman (not my biological mother) who would get very upset if I smelled bad. Nothing in our house could ever smell bad or she would throw a fit. My wife is also like that. She is very personal hygiene conscious and a bit of a germophobe.

Last week, we were working in our back yard. She was pushing the lawn mower and I was cutting overgrown branches. It was hot and we got sweaty. Then I started painting the garage and my wife also helped. The garage gets hot as it does not have any air-conditioning or even a fan.

We were both drenched in sweat but the work continued as I was up on the ladder. By the time I got down, we were both very damp. She was wearing a white t-shirt / tank top and it was so damp that it was sticking to her body like a transparent second skin and I could see the bra and what it contained.

For some reason I felt aroused at that sight. I asked her if she would have sex. She said it is middle of the day. I told her I am feeling aroused and she said it will take her time to shower so why dont we plan it for the night so that we could both freshen up. I told her that it is an urgent need and I do not know if I can wait. She asked me what triggered it and I did not know. I told her maybe it is the way you are exposed? She said "I am dirty." I told her "I am hard."

One thing led to another and we ended up in our room where we had sex while we both smelled ... lets say not very good. The sweaty smells that people wear deodorants to eliminate were very obvious but for some reason they were mutually arousing??? it was sweaty, slippery, dirty, smelly, animalistic sex. Bodies feel different when they are damp and slippery so may be it was that, but she had 5 orgasms. I also experienced probably the most intense one.

We showered (separately) but never spoke about it. How do you say to your partner, "By the way, you smelled dirty and I loved it!" Not sure how the other would take it. She never said it but we both knew we loved it.

I am embarrassed and disturbed by it. Secretly, I must confess that I would like to do it again but I am so ... like I do not have the words to even admit it. May be I am twisted?

Just a confession!

I am a Pakistani man married to a Bosnian woman, so if you were to say we are an "interracial couple" then you would not be wrong. I do not like that term so I prefer the term "cross cultural marriage" instead. She is an amazing woman and the best wife a man can ask for but our marriage is a violation of every single "how to get married" lesson, a young man would get from his parents.

Rule number one is ... "Always marry within your culture!"

I say BS! Culture has already made a lot of decisions for us, like when we will wake up, what we will eat for breakfast, what clothes we will wear, what we will eat for lunch, the kind of woman we should marry, the wedding menu, the clothes we will wear on the wedding etc. The moment you become the man who values his culture, you have instantly lost control over your life. Your culture is nothing but a set of premade decisions meant for mass replication. No thanks.

My wife is the woman I want for my own selfish reasons. I was not performing for a culturally selected audience when I went for that woman. And ... my culture has not forgiven me for it.

I remember the first Pakistani wedding I took my wife to. All heads turned to look in our direction and many people had a look of religious disgust on their faces. We, Muslims make a unique facial expression when we look at each other with religious disgust.

In order to replicate that facial expression you must do two things at the exact same time. Look at me with a distant gaze like you are five miles away even though we could be ten feet from you. Good! Now make a Robert Dinero face like drop the outer edges of your lips and raise your nose up. Ya.

With this expression the community was saying to me, "Do you not see our beards? Do you not see our hijabs? Do you not see how holy we are? There are three generations of holy people sitting here and you will bring your teenage rebellion in our sacred presence?"

My wife, who is as much a Muslim as anyone there looked at me and asked, "why are they looking at us like that?" I explained to her that they think we are fornicating. She was shocked! "I am a born Muslim for generations. I am a survivor of a genocide that none of them witnessed. We got married in a mosque! How dare they look at me like that???"

"Oh they have no idea that you are my halal meat!" I told her.

In our case, there is one major problem. My wife is very attractive! Had she been average looking we would still get it but an attractive woman? Blonde hair, blue eyes, wide square jaw with raised cheek bones. Think "Stiffler's Mom" but shorter and curvier. Modest clothing always fails to do its job on her. She has the bust that refuses to play hide-and-seek and she has those hips that she can do nothing about. Anything on that figure will be an absolute failure of modesty!

People see us together and they assume things about me. I am the guy who saw this goddess and lost his mind. Who started thinking from his balls instead and has no shame in bringing his woman into this gathering of holy people and letting everyone know that he thinks from his balls! Shameless.

Men hate me because they know that once this party is over, I will take this woman home and bang her so mercilessly that I will rearrange her insides; a punishment for being that beautiful, a punishment she would not mind receiving.

Pakistani women are lovely. They are some of the most beautiful women in the world but they are rarely chosen in marriage for that. We have mechanisms in place that prevents men from thinking from their balls, such as gender segregation in gatherings, and no dating etc. Marriage, we are told is not a union between two people but two families. How romantic is that right???

All Pakistani women have a "vagina management committee" that interviews every marriage prospect to make sure that the guy is not thinking from his balls. In order to appear in front of their vagina management committee, you will have to bring your own "genital supervisory council" who will negotiate with the woman's vagina management committee to convince them that this is not a decision made from a young mans balls. Being a beautiful woman in Pakistani society does not get you as much brownie points because men cant think from their balls.

Even the most amazingly beautiful Pakistani woman in marriage sees herself as a "theological" choice. Initially, she prides herself for being that, but then she realizes that there is nothing flattering about being a man's theological choice because every theological decision he has ever made is an intentional act of inconvenience. He wakes up before sunrise to pray and bears that inconvenience to please God. He starves himself during Ramadan and bears that inconvenience to please God. She starts to see herself as the next inconvenience her husband has to bear to please God. She wonders where her man will go when he is not religious and she gets insecure.

My wife knows that on the day I am religious I am hers. On the day I am an animal, I am definitely hers. She is not afraid of the animal inside me because she owns that beast. In other words, she has me by my balls.

During that wedding an older couple mentioned right on my face that it is always wise to marry within your culture! Who says that on your face? I decided to let them have it.

"What exactly is my culture"? I asked. "Chicken Biryani is my culture and I love that. But I am not going to change my wife for that. What else is my culture? Beef Kabobs is my culture and I love beef kabobs but I am not going to trade my wife for those. What exactly has your culture produced for which I should trade my woman? Shalwar Qameez??? No I will not trade my wife for those. I will wear jeans all my life to keep the woman."

They were stunned. No one talks back to an older generation like that. As a man who is shunned, I had no reason to hold back so I continued.

"I know that it will be very shocking to a lot of people from my culture how can there be a man who values his wife more than chicken biryani? How can such a disgraceful human being exist? Has he never eaten Biryani? In our culture men do not marry women. They marry chicken biryani and beef kabobs and a woman is just an accessory that comes attached to that. But yes, men like me do exist. But your culture is incapable of producing us so we can only be born when your culture is thrown in the garbage! Now I would like to leave."

Grabbed my woman and left without saying farewell to the host. She was not that innocent either.

Historically, Islam has produced some of the most passionately romantic men who wrote love poems in Persian and Arabic and Shah Jahan built Taj Mahal, one of the few wonders of the world for his wife.

But tombs are not encouraged in Islam so if I wanted to make a historical monument for my beautiful wife, who has enslaved me in her love, then what would that be? Should it even be an architectural monument or what should it be?

Ideas please and Islamic ones only. No human statues etc.

Edit: She is alive.

My wife and I were invited to a dinner. We are not a couple that shows public affection. You will never even see us holding hands because we like to keep our romance behind the walls. That evening she wore a very low neck, and since she is busty, there was a whole lot of boobage on display!

I did not realize that I was staring at them but a lot of people noticed. She came up to me and whispered, "Would you please stop staring at my tits?" I apologized and got busy with the other men but when dinner was served, I was looking at them again. It is instinctive reaction and something I can not really help! She is a lovely woman, specially in that area so I was thinking it should not be a big deal since we are married.

She came up to me and said, "Could you please cut it out? you are constantly staring at me!" I felt a bit snubbed. I bid an early farewell to the party and sat out in the car. She came out after cutting her own stay short and while we were driving home, she said that I did not need to create a scene. I told her that I do not need your permission to find you attractive!

She said that she appreciated that I am attracted to her and it is very flattering, specially in front of her friends because they all find it cute but I need to be careful.

I told her that we are married and I do no need see any issues here. Most married men check out other women and here I am being disciplined for checking out my own wife! She said that it is not my eyes that she minds, but when I am looking at her, then the whole party looks into the direction where I am staring and that causes everyone eyes on her cleavage. She said "people were following your gaze and then were looking at my tits and then your eyes and then my tits and then your eyes and my tits!"

I was quite upset because when she told me to cut it out, I felt that a few of her friends realized what was going on and they were suppressing their laugh. I felt like I did not need to be disciplined like that and if she had just sat there and allowed me my moment of admiration, then no one would care. Men would see her and understand exactly why I married her and women would say "Oh he is so into her!" Either ways it would not have been a big deal.

Anyway, we argued all the way back and I felt that she was actually enjoying that argument? Like me insisting that I will look and her saying no you cant! I dont know but I felt like she was getting kicks of power out of that?

We got home and I went to bed pretty ticked off but she woke me up and said she does not want me to go to sleep angry and she is grateful to have me as her husband. Then she made love to me. It was totally her initiative but the sex was great. I really needed that so no complaints.

Anyway, we woke up this Sunday (two days back) and she was back to her normal self again like nothing happened. No apology or further discussion like nothing happened. She was caring like making my favorite food and being affectionate but I am still unsure where that issue stands. I am not sure if I should bring it up? Since things are back to normal I do not want to start an argument but I am just wondering ... do I just let it go???

Do women find it offensive if your husband checked you out or even ogled you in public? Would you snub him first and then reward him later? What goes on in a womans mind??? I cant figure you all out.

tl;dr We had an argument because I was checking her out in front of other people.

Wondering if there is anyone who used tactical shotguns to down birds? I am getting one and I am wondering how much of a disadvantage would it be to down birds with it?

Or ... would I need a dedicated bird hunting one from day one?

Would 7+1 tactical shotguns like Mossburg 940 Pro be allowed? The stated limit according to VA ban is 7 rounds but does that exclude the one in chamber?

Which do you prefer for home defense?

It was my brother-in-laws wedding. We were taking silly family pictures with the bride and the groom and in one of those, my wife came and sat on my lap sideways. She was wearing a deep, plunging low neck that is intentionally cut to put her boobage on display.

My wife is pretty large up there and while we have been married for many years, I cant get over them. Anyway. in that picture she rotated her torso to face me and they were right in my face. I glanced at them for may be a second too long but when the pictures came it was embarrassing.

It really looks like a 70s movie poster where an infatuated man is staring at the upper swells of a woman's breasts while she looks into the camera and the facial expression on the guys face is absolute "beauty shock!" Its pure comedy!

When the pic came out, people were laughing at it. The bride felt that it was "the cutest pic" of all and it needs to be shared! She posted it on the facebook page. I woke up the morning and logged on and that picture had close to a hundred comments on it.

Some of these are as follows:

"Awww that is so cute!"

"Can someone delete this please?"

"Yes. Focus ..."

"This is so funny! The best wedding pic!"

"Mesmerized much???"

"Jenn, he is a keeper!" (That is my wife's name)

"Oh my God the look ... this is so hilarious!"

"Jenn you are so bad ... lol"

"Ya Jen. You got him gal! This one ain't going no where!"

"Hilarious!"

Then there are all sorts of memes and emojis and what not. I asked my wife to reach out to her sister in law and ask her to take it down since we are not comfortable. She says "a million people have seen it and commented on it so what difference does it make. Besides, you look so cute!"

The problem is that all other people in the same pic are more poised and graceful and they are all focusing on the camera with a smile. They all look like professional models posing for a portrait. And here I am looking like an absolute GOOF totally ignoring the camera and staring into my wife's tits!

I am thinking if I should call my brother in law and ask him to take it down? Or should I just let it pass?

tl;dr Got photographed staring into my wife's cleavage and the pic is on social media?

If you are a PhD or Masters, than would a Bachelors degree holder work? How about a high school diploma holder with specialized certifications that allow him to earn a lot of money.

I ask because I would like to know general female preferences in this matter.

Jazak' Allah Shukran!

I ask because we tell women what to look for in a man instead of asking them what they actually look for in a man. Please tell me what do you look for in a man and please do not throw cliche' terms like "kindness" "honesty?" These are obvious because no one is mad enough to look for an unkind and dishonest man.

Instead explain that when does kindness mean to you? If I was to take your requirements and go looking for a man, what list would you hand me?