u/Conscious_Skin_903

I’m neurodivergent, and keeping my mask on outside the house is already exhausting. By the time I get home, I have nothing left. At home, I’m weird, playful, and unpredictable, that’s just who I am when I’m not performing.

But my family acts like my number one haters. They don’t say it outright, but their reactions say everything. The looks, like “what the hell are you wearing?” or “why would you say that?” The microaggressions. The annoyed glances when I express myself. The ghosting mid-conversation, talking over me, even in front of other people. I honestly hate going out in public with them. It’s embarrassing.

They want me to accept their micromanaging, but the more I open up, the more excluded and smaller I feel.

At work and in college, I’m the complete opposite, respected, capable, myself in a different way.

So now, to protect myself from what feels like psychological abuse, I have to be extremely careful. Watch every word. Hide my true self. Share nothing anymore.

I’m neurodivergent, and keeping my mask on outside the house is already exhausting. By the time I get home, I have nothing left. At home, I’m weird, playful, and unpredictable, that’s just who I am when I’m not performing.

But my family acts like my number one haters. They don’t say it outright, but their reactions say everything. The looks, like “what the hell are you wearing?” or “why would you say that?” The microaggressions. The annoyed glances when I express myself. The ghosting mid-conversation, talking over me, even in front of other people. I honestly hate going out in public with them. It’s embarrassing.

They want me to accept their micromanaging, but the more I open up, the more excluded and smaller I feel.

At work and in college, I’m the complete opposite, respected, capable, myself in a different way.

So now, to protect myself from what feels like psychological abuse, I have to be extremely careful. Watch every word. Hide my true self. Share nothing anymore.

I've tried many times to get into deep meditation before sleep, but I find it really hard to feel myself in my body and shut off my mind.
I want to meditate because I feel anxious and overthink a lot, especially about my exams. This ends up distracting me when I try to study.

Any tips that actually work please ?

I feel anxious and my heart starts beating fast when I hear shouting or people arguing, especially if it's a family matter. What could be the reason? What can I do about it? What type of therapy might help?

I keep seeing tips in this subreddit, especially about "feeling is the secret." I have a specific situation.

I'm in university. Finals are in 15 days. Here, midterms are worth 20% and finals 80% of the final grade. My midterm score is horrible, so I have almost nothing from that 20%. I need to crush the 80% finals to pass. The subjects are long, and I'm anxious.

What can i do to get the highest possible results in 15 days?

I keep seeing tips in this subreddit, especially about "feeling is the secret." I have a specific situation.

I'm in university. Finals are in 15 days. Here, midterms are worth 20% and finals 80% of the final grade. My midterm score is horrible, so I have almost nothing from that 20%. I need to crush the 80% finals to pass. The subjects are long, and I'm anxious.

What can i do to get the highest possible results in 15 days?

There are no places offering Qigong or Tai Chi where I live. Can I learn these practices online? And are there authentic mentors who provide proper training remotely?

Would you like me to also recommend trusted online platforms or teachers for Qigong and Tai Chi?