u/KurlyKayla

Hi fans! I'm back for this season as a relatively new fan of Project Runway. Season 21 was my first watch through last year, and as a new fan, even I had some criticisms for how that season went. I'm curious if season 22 has made improvements from last season so far, or is it about the same, or (hopefully not) worse?

Would prefer if it covered different cultures as well, but I essentially would like to read up on how Purity Culture informs our modern-day biases regarding sex and sexuality

My sister and I had a fight that feels kinda out of left field, but I worry if I might be the asshole here.

I struggle with procrastination and home upkeep, and tend to avoid having people over without warning in case my apartment is messy. The exceptions are emergencies. That's not to say I never have people over. In fact, inviting guests actually motivates me to clean, but this week I fell off track.

Anyway, my sister previously asked me to dog-sit, originally planning to drop him off at the end of the week, then shifting to Thursday. No problem. I’d have time to tidy up by then. But today, she asked to drop him off tonight because she'd be in the area and didn't want to make 2 trips. I wouldn't have time to clean after work, but I still agreed.

The fight started when she asked to hang out and catch up for a bit once her dog was settled. I offered to meet her in the lobby to chat instead of having her come up since my place was cluttered and I hadn't had time to clean. She got upset, asking why I keep "relegating" her to the lobby.

For context, she knows my hangups and says she doesn't care about the mess, but this doesn't change the fact that *I* care and that it makes me uncomfortable to have people in my home when it's not orderly. She made it sound like I regularly bar her from my home, but she’s visited many times and has been more than welcome in my unit. I’ve only met with her in the lobby once before, which was another unexpected visit while I was WFH. Tonight would’ve been the second time.

She asked how I’d feel if she always made me meet in her lobby when I came to visit. I said I wouldn’t care if I knew she wasn't comfortable having me up in her untidy home. She said she doesn’t understand why I’m always so uncomfortable about this, which made me feel defensive and like she doesn't respect my boundary. I'd already accommodated the earlier-than-expected dog drop off and would've been happy to do a visit with her, just not in my room. We got more upset and hung up, and she left.

I worry I might be the asshole because maybe she's right and me keeping her in the lobby is rude? Maybe I am indeed being too weird about this? There's also other personal stuff happening on her end that I suspect she wanted have a heart-to-heart over in a private setting. But if that's the case, I wish she’d just said that instead of making me feel like I did something wrong. Am I missing something? I don't usually fight with my sister like this, so this all feels odd and conflicting to me.

I don't care about it. I like wearing vibrant makeup. I like wearing long nails and eyelashes. I like wearing colorful and unnatural hair colors. I like wearing heels. I love my piercings. It's self expression, and whoever told women that we're meant to conform to "natural" looks to appease others (let alone men) is boring and just wants people to be suppressed.

/rantover

fuck you to hell and back

TLDR: TFA is a product of its time and successfully serves its purpose for the sequel trilogy and the Star Wars franchise at large by balancing nostalgia with novelty.

Unfortunately, it sometimes feels like the broader Star Wars fandom at times suffers from selective amnesia, whether by pretending the prequels were never hated, or asserting the sequels were despised from the outset.

They were not. In fact, much of the criticism The Force Awakens receives now relies on an amnesiac recollection of what was going on in human history at the time of its release.

As a recap, there had been no Star Wars films released to screen in 10 years since ep III. There had been no Star Wars films that pertained to the OT characters since 1983. A 32-year delta. There was also the added nuance of Disney purchasing Lucasfilm and audiences having mixed reactions to that, hoping the studio would do right by this massive franchise.

Quite a lot was riding on this film. They needed to make a movie that not only brought in old audiences nostalgic for the classic Star Wars we all know, but also appeal to new audiences by introducing elements that ushered in the new era.

The Force Awakens accomplished this. There may be some legitimacy to the criticisms of it being a rehash of ANH, or JJ Abrams relying on nostalgia-bait. But if there had been no familiarity or too few nostalgic elements, or if it had gone too bold and did something entirely new from the jump, it would have failed in its mission to bridge the old and the new in a time when people had been yearning for Star Wars for over a decade.

So yes, of course they are going to play up the reveal of the millennium falcon. Yes, they’re going to throw in a multitude of Easter eggs. We’re gonna get a lot of saccharine and sentimental music cues when we see Chewie and Han and Leia back on screen. It’s what was expected, if not required. And I think if those moments weren’t in the film, if there were hardly any nods to the shoulders this movie stood upon, that would’ve ostracized audiences more than convince them.

That said, there are new elements TFA introduces as well that genuinely made people excited for the subsequent films. I wanted to see how the build up to this almost mythicized interpretation of Luke would play out. I wanted to see what would become of Finn, a stormtrooper gone rogue. I wanted to see what would happen to Kylo Ren, a character who’s just committed an unspeakable act, but doesn’t seem entirely bought in to his own convictions. Killing Han Solo was, by all accounts, a shocking and bold move. So too was highlighting the OT trio’s failures.

In a non-narrative sense, the film took measures to assert itself as something new to connect with newer audiences. At the time, Rey being a female protagonist was a statement. Finn being a defected stormtrooper, and a Black stormtrooper at that, was also a statement.

The point being, TFA is nostalgic, yes, but it’s brave where it needed to be brave, especially given the context surrounding it at the time. Therein lies its success. It served as a bridge between the old and the new by giving us the familiar while also opening the door to uncharted territories.

Whether you think those new territories explored in TLJ and beyond were successful or not is a different conversation, but as far as the role TFA played, not just in the story, but in the cultural headspace of fans at the time, it fulfilled its mission successfully.

I tried asking this in askfeminists and it got taken down, so I’ll ask here.

Truth be told, I don’t even know if what I have in mind is actual misandry. “The hatred of men” doesn’t seem specific enough, so I will give my interpretation, and i would like to be told whether this is actual misandry, and if it can or cannot coincide with feminism.

Essentially, as long as patriarchy exists, I don’t think women should entangle with men under any permanent capacity. I don’t think women should have kids with them, move in with them, share finances with them, or marry them. Being friends with them or having casual dating flings with them is okay (though there are still risks) because if something does go awry, one can more readily extract themselves from the situation than if they are more deeply involved in the ways I describe above.

I believe there is something inherently flawed about a system that expects you to marry your oppressor, or give birth to your own oppressor, or give birth to the class that will be oppressed. I don’t think this system does a good job incentivizing women to engage with men in these ways, and often times, they are harmed when they do. The only reason we have prioritized doing this so much is because of social and economic conditioning.

I want to emphasize that I’m not against these things as a permanent rule, but rather believe we should deprioritize them until patriarchy is gone. Only when patriarchy is dead and men are forced to change will I think these avenues are safe to take with men, for women and for kids.

This is how I feel about men in general. There are obviously going to be exceptions, and those exceptions are reserved for men who have unpacked. But patriarchy neither encourages nor expects men to do this, meaning men in general are not safe.

I classify this in my head as misandry because I do believe under patriarchy, men as a general collective are not good people, and they will have no incentive or desire to change and abandon the benefits of being an oppressive class unless forced. But I also think it can coincide with feminism because I don’t think these failures in men are inherent and that they do indeed have the capacity to take accountability and change, even if force is the way to get them to do so.

Does this viewpoint track or make sense in line with feminism? I feel like some people might call these views extreme, or 4B, or misandry, none of which I’m especially concerned with. I’m just concerned with patriarchy dying and protecting women as much as possible in the meantime. I would love to hear your thoughts.

EDIT: I really appreciate the thoughtful responses, everyone. Lots of good discussions and viewpoints. I think I'll def stick around in this sub in the future.

Warning: Long Write Up because Kylo is my favorite character.

TLDR: Kylo's a trainwreck [affectionate], he's got motivations, they're just not the same as Vader's, and that's okay.

There is a recent post about Kylo Ren, which has received large support boosted by this sub's unfortunate increased dislike for the Sequels. But, frankly put, I found a lot of the criticisms in that post ranging from vague to a little inaccurate.

In an attempt to provide a counterweight perspective, I'm throwing my hat in the ring to defend my boy. I am long-winded, so I apologize in advance:

At times, it seems like Kylo's critics can't decide whether he's liked because he's "cool and edgy" or because he's "tragic and conflicted". I would say it's both.

Kylo is liked because he's a confluence of misdirected capability and train wrecks. Someone who is incredibly gifted, dangerous, a threat to the galaxy, but a failure at the one job he's tasked himself to achieve. In each film, he charges headfirst in pursuit of his convictions, only to stumble, crash, and burn each time. As it goes with most wrecks, it's hard to look away. Yet from the rubble, a friction is created between villainy and sympathy that serves as the foundation for his popularity.

I'm not fully sure why critics lament his being a 'wannabe Vader' as though it's not something explicitly intended for his character, but if you view Kylo Ren in the lens of someone who is desperately trying to convince themselves they are dastardly as opposed to someone who is fully bought into said dastardly deeds, his failures make sense. He can't commit and excel as a Dark Sider so long as he is tempted by the Light.

The OP says this lack of commitment to the Dark side makes his motivations shallow and paper thin, but when we look at his family and the desire he later expresses to "let old things die", the motivation becomes clear, even if it's not clear to him. The man wants acceptance.

A prevailing theme of the Sequel Trilogy is the idea of legacy not defining the identities of those who bequeath it. In Rey's case (for the first two films), her being of no special legacy didn't mean she couldn't shape an identity of significance. And in TROS, once the Palpatine element was introduced, her predilection for the Dark side didn't mean she couldn't choose the Light.

In Kylo's case, he dealt with the inverse circumstance, in which the legacy of Skywalker, Solo, Organa, and Vader meant he was laden with significance since birth. Unlike Rey, however, he interpreted his uncle's actions as an irreparable rejection from the Light and fell to the Dark as a consequence, seeking out a connection to Vader and guidance from Snoke in the hopes he could find acceptance on that path instead.

In supplementary material, it's established this was by Palpatine's design. I won't harp on this point too much as I think Kylo's role in the films should speak for itself instead of relying on added material, but since OP brought it up, it's explained how Palpatine, not Snoke, bridged a connection with young Ben subtly and unnoticed to the point Luke himself didn't notice at first.

In any case, once Kylo meets Rey, his want for acceptance turns to her, and sensing her temptation to the Dark, he genuinely believes this is the way he can get it. But of course, she doesn't accept him (which I think she should've) until he returns to the Light.

The OP who inspired this post describes Kylo as foolish, which, in-narrative, he is, but it's not for lack of motivation nor complexity. When you accept Kylo is fooling himself by playing as a 'child in a mask' for the sake of being accepted by Snoke, or metaphysically by Vader, his aspirations get an added tint of color. He represents the limbo of lost identity, trying to find meaning in a galaxy he perceives as having forsaken him, and for the broader story, presents ideas that question the legitimacy of a repeated war of ages past. He is the connection between the past and what the future could become.

Now, yes, it's one thing to just be conflicted or uncommitted to evil, and it wouldn't be the first kind of character we see like that. But what makes Kylo fascinating to audiences are the sheer lengths he's willing to go to fool himself. For all his uncertainty, he is still very much a dangerous, volatile antagonist who kills his own father, aides in the deaths of billions, and doggedly holds to the conviction that the Jedi are wrong.

On top of this, his actor, Adam Driver, and the directors, Rian Johnson (and to a lesser extent) JJ Abrams don't shy away from showing, not just telling, us the variable ways in which Kylo Ren experiences conflict and remorse. We get lingering shots of weepiness, lip quivers, eye twitches, pained and downright agonized moments that clash with the above transgressions. It's friction. One that chaffes and sticks with you and makes it so that you don't always know what his character might do.

A prime example is the debate as to whether the end of TLJ sets Kylo up to the be the big bad or not. I and many others say that it doesn't, while many others believe that it does, and the fact that it could go either way demonstrates how unstable Kylo's character was and would continue to be until his eventual turn in TROS.

I'll conclude this write-up by acknowledging that neither Kylo Ren nor the films are perfect. I think TROS in particular gets shaky with the exact 'how' of Kylo's ultimate turn. There are things I wish were done differently, such as Rey taking his hand in TLJ, and his turn coming earlier in TROS. It also would have been wonderful if certain deleted scenes had been kept in, such as his somber exploration of the Millenium Falcon or the interrogation with Chewie.

Yet in spite of these flaws, I believe the other post takes for granted some aspects of his character, and I personally think he's one of the strongest characters of the trilogy and of the franchise. Everyone of course doesn't and won't agree, but I do think it's important to distinguish between not liking elements of a story, and pretending the elements aren't there at all.

On one hand, it's great to see Black characters that are flawed and allowed the breathing room to be imperfect and terrible without race being a driving factor. On the other, when race is considered, it does make some things in the film feel a little odd. The "you blame the world" and "it's just your wiring" speech adopts an uncomfortable undertone. The fact that the movie shifts its focus from the Black lead to a white lead doesn't exactly feel great. And the optics of said white lead fighting off a giant Black monstrosity are sort of a question mark.

At the same time, if I divorce Clark's race from things, the movie quickly feels like it's a condemnation of people's inability to adapt and take accountability, especially as it pertains to men and their interpersonal dynamics with women (Clark's relationship with his wife, then his dynamic with the therapist). So I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this aspect of the movie.

Overall, I like the film a lot and will likely watch again, but I'm wondering if others have picked up on what I'm picking up on, bearing in mind that I'm a Black woman with specific experiences that will color my perception of the story.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the lightsaber scene in TROS and the potential possibilities were this ability to be further explored. It seems like the films were setting up a feature of the Force in which full-scale teleportation could be achievable. Imagine being able to bring someone from lightyears away to where you are. Or being in the midst of battle like Rey and Ben were and being transported out of harm’s way. It seems pretty neat and I wish we could see more.

Hello, I managed to negotiate with a new job to work from home twice out of the week. Their only stipulation is that my internet download speeds need to be fairly fast. My internet as it is now is fine, but my job requires that I download large file sizes, sometimes gigabytes worth of files, from the company server, which in the past has taken quite a bit of time to do from home.

Do you know any options I could consider to get around this? Would it be a matter of upgrading my internet plan, or is there a device I could purchase to help?

Thanks!

Hello, not sure if this is the place for this, but I managed to negotiate with a new job to work from home twice out of the week. Their only stipulation is that my internet speed and bandwidth need to be fairly fast. My internet as it is now is fine, but my job requires that I download large file sizes, sometimes gigabytes from the company server, which in the past has taken quite a bit of time to do from home.

Do you know any options I could consider to get around this? Would it be a matter of upgrading my internet plan, or is there a device I could purchase to help?

Thanks!

This is the key art for May 4th.

I get there's a subsect of the fandom that doesn't like the sequels, but I don't get why DLF themselves are continuing to erase these movies and characters? What exactly is the plan here? Piss Sequel Fans off enough that we just fall off, and they can pretend we nor the movies never existed? Is that what they want? It's getting weird.

https://preview.redd.it/t3l55fhtknyg1.png?width=1600&format=png&auto=webp&s=7895514be82787d7f0f8b03976b0e3da1f586d04