


I'm getting tired of being single but like being alone
Ive lived alone for 7 years. In that time I've gotten a career, two cats, halfway restored a ranchero, got a motorcycle, got in shape, picked up guitar, and got in tune with myself, just to name a few.
Ive been single for 4 of that with no intimacy in over 2.5. I dont have contact with my family because of how the majority of them treated me. I know being alone isnt a bad thing, but at a certain point am I just too busted to be desired?
Things like a drivetrain swap, painting my car, and learning a new song on guitar all feel hollow with no partner to share them with. They feel good because Im aware they aren't easy tasks, but when i spend 6 hours figuring out why my motor isnt working, I would kill to have a partner to go "I did it! Check this out, this is what I did!"
I dont have the best luck with dating. I tend to admit that I like the person and for whatever reason thats not what people like to hear. My last relationship cheated on me with her ex, the one prior used me to move to a different state, and I haven't had the best luck since then. I miss getting to know another person without a catch. The last woman I talked to said she cared about me, then the next day ghosted me for another man. I found out by seeing them in person holding hands. She still hasn't apologized and I dont expect her to. Ive since blocked her.
I've done everything a man "is supposed to do" shy of buying a house, and while i dont feel lost, I'm exhausted.
People say "28 isn't that old, you have plenty of time to meet someone!" But I'm not sure i feel that's true anymore. I'm grateful ive remained sober in all of this, having not drank or smoked anything in 1y 7m, but man is it tempting due to the accessibility.
That said, I enjoy my space. The solace of silence is hard to overlook. Its been mine and mine alone for a long time and I haven't had a roommate since I was 19. I got to decorate my space as I wanted, and I think I could have done worse.