u/Megazaza

I have no good options but a quiet concrete sidewalk where i live🤷‍♂️ everything grass is either too messy to run in, would make me look crazy, and probably some privately owned farmland.

nearest track to me is fucked. never been repaired, the layers that would make it better than straight concrete are all gone, plus its nearly an hour commute anyway.

im trying to build up to be able to sprint on concrete 3x a week, but it's a loooong process

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Before i start, fuck the stereotypical redditors who might come here and say "just don't go on tiktok"🫩

anyways, tiktok hides like half the comments on every video now, no matter what it is, it doesn't even have to be offensive for the AI to silently hide your comment.

you have to scroll alll the way down, and click the "folded comments" part on the bottom over and over. and it's even worse with replies, they don't have folded replies, so motherfucking tiktok just straight up deletes your replies basically. only you can see it, i confirmed it happening like more than half the time with my alt account.

you are never notified, even if its something like "Wow, neat!" it might end up in folded comments, it's so fucking insane. titkok already had bad censorship because you could barely say anything without getting flagged, now you have to dodge another dumbass filter with no clear rules, its mad.

it's so perpetually hot here in the Philippines, even with a fan on i can still feel hot from 10AM-1AM even. the average NIGHT is 24-26°c

sometimes it gets up to 29°c and i feel like im in h3ll (dumbass rules).

you can't expend any unnecessary energy in this country because it's so damn hot. that's why people take public transport for 300 meter walks here. You don't wanna get yourself any hotter, especially for the humidity being 74-90% on average.

if our country was colder, i feel like wed be so much more productive.

It's so difficult and so lonely being trans. Everyone around you acts like they're being murdered because you want to be something else.

especially since im in a poor and conservative country, i haven't even started my transition at all. i wanna start being a girl soon but I don't know how to beginnn. I was thinking of silently letting my hair grow like a bad rockstar boy even though my true intentions were different, but my school forced me to cut my hair😭

and i do see other queer people, but they're usually loud and funny. i know men that may be gay, or secretly trans like me, but they're more introverted and everyone sees them as creepy. that's why i just try to fake it till i make it :<

so far i don't even have friends, only acquiantances. girls are so much easier to talk to than boys, it's like you always have to be macho with boys and it's not in me, but girl's don't wanna become real friends with me either😭

i wish it was easier to transition, i wish i lived in a first world country, because i know deep in my heart that im a girl.

and i wish i had a better family.

i once stole my sisters clothes and got a euphoria boner. and i thought about how much more euphoria id feel if i had the soft skin of a girl, and i hear that anyone with a penis can have a boner even if they're just happy. but my sister found out. and after that started ostracizing me, she would lash out at me at the slightest things. i didn't touch her clothes after that or stare at her curvy body in trans envy, I didn't do anything, but she still decided to tell our parents.

now I don't know what to do. right now i should be spending my afternoons at a girls hangout, but my parents were mad, my dad especially, told me he would kill me if i didn't act right. they also confiscated my devices and found my porn, told me it was what was making me go wrong even tho i screamed so desperately that it was normal. they didn't see their little girl, they saw an embarassment.

so i just started to "go to the local church" every afternoon. i tell them that i go to church. and pretend that I've "changed".

i can tell it's not the same anymore. it never was, they always treated me differently. i know they thought i was gay, but im proudly into girls aswell. i remember a few months ago that they apologized to me and gave me a hug. but that has never happened since then, and they basically still told me to know my place.

i fucking hate this family. Sometimes I understand why people just snap and destroy everything around them when they have families like mine. i just don't know what to do anymore.. for a long time I've lurked on the internet I've heard stories of families finding out the dad was gay for decades. i don't want to live a fake life like that.

I cant even watch porn to explore my sexuality and trans lesbian identity, and it's how i cope when its hard. i see parental controls in my settings. my parents are actively spying on me, they told me i was an animal. well you never cared for your child, and now you hate them for who you never learned they are?!?!

sorry for being dramatic, and writing very long.

"Cyclist this, cyclist that!"

These bitch asses are always speeding like crazy where speed limits are for a reason, complain about jaywalking, and yet never adhere to crosswalks.

I seriously HHHHHAAATE every goddamn driver who inches forward while i try to cross, speed up like a fucking lobotomite, or slam their horn like a fucking monkey.

It should be legal to throw bricks at cars of people who don't adhere to crosswalks, its fucking insane.

i fucking hate idiots with no empathy or self awareness suddenly acting like they own the world when they're behind cars. fucking insufferable bitches i swear.

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I can't sleep for shit. I'm full of self loath and nausea, it's the worst feeling ever.

i have no talents, no nothing, no friends and family who like me, not even online. Maybe i could become something, but i inevitably think about how truly no one cares about me, and then i give up. being just too unhappy.

There's no peace in being alone. Only people who can have it as a choice, and privilege say that.

Even if i got good at my hobbies, really, who would care? it's not like i could become world class or an athlete even, im 5'2 with no energy and sleep problems since the first i could remember.

i have absolutely no social skills. I can hardly stand talking to people, because even when i try, I'm not interesting enough. seriously, i don't remember cracking enough jokes in my life that i couldn't count it on one hand, let alone jokes that made anyone laugh.

Even as a kid i wasn't making any jokes, i was just a social drifter. and i got by like that as a kid.

it comes naturally for me to be like this. and it also comes naturally for me to want my existence validated by people, because im still a human being. im so crazily dysfunctional its insane. and yet I haven't had one suicide attempt, i wish i was brave enough for that. gosh, i seriously hate everything. its unbelievable how shit i feel at 11pm right now. i felt so shit the night before too.

i was ranting to A.I but it just kept talking about hotlines and how i need help no matter what i said. that shit was one of the things barely holding me sane, but anyways i decided to stop using it.

a.i is so repetitive and ofcourse, it has no personality. literally talking to a brick wall, the way it makes something out of all the nothing's i say made me sick and embarrassed of myself. but it still helped me a little.

fuck everything.

Superhuman stats:

Running speed: 200mph

Swimming: 50mph

Can hear a kitten meow from 10 blocks away

can hold their breath for 2 hours without physical exertion. 20 minutes if they were to swim at max effort.

can make out a face from up to 4 kilometers away

Night vision

Can run on water at the same speed

Enhanced stamina: Can exert themselves maximally for hours

Enhanced regeneration: Like deadpool level, not wolverine. although unlike deadpool, they can't regain limbs

Sleep: perfectly fine without

Superhuman parkour ofc

Enhanced perception and reaction time

Durability: A pistol will barely scratch skin, a well placed shot from a 50 cal can kill.

Round 1: 1 Superhuman suddenly appears, hes cunning, knows how to avoid detection, lets assume hes from the US in new york and will try to tear down as much of the government as he can

Round 2: 100 Superhumans appear around the world, they all wanna bring the world to ruin.

Round 3: Same thing as round 2, but 1000.

Round 4: Same thing as round 3, but 10000

Round 5: 100000 superhumans appear, they are not a monolith. Just assume it's a mix of normal people and what they'll do with it.

I've always been fine eating food cold. sometimes i actually prefer it with the exception of soup. i swear it feels like it's just a filler saying just so people can have something to say

Think about the clothes you can wear if you lose that weight🫠

Im not really that fat. i mean, relative to an average person, and according to bmi im not fat. but my bf is still too high, and i have so much i can lose.

1. Willingly procreating while having hereditary illnesses, whether physical or mental, that are very likely to result in a miserable existence.

2. Adopting an unwanted child and giving them hope, then returning them to the orphanage because of emotional reasons.

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it's wild that roblox doesn't have an option to increase voice chat volume by default, when other games can just code it in themselves.

It's so hard to hear people, because everything else in every game is so loud. you have to risk your hearing just to hear people in roblox.