u/Ok_Doughnut4318

I want to bring some gifts over for some people who I will be staying with, but I don’t want to bring over things that are just going to become junk.
What are some things that a Fijian family may want, that they typically can’t buy/ wouldn’t buy themselves, that I would be able to give them?

I thought chocolates from my country, tea towels, nice hand lotion or soap, perfume…

Is it genuinely not a wise idea to travel to outer islands with myself (female adult) and toddler, age 4, with the on-going mosquito outbreak in Fiji? Wanting to come to Fiji but not wanting to run those risks.

Learning of stonefish has made me wary of my future plans to take my toddler to Raro. At 3, I don’t think my child would get the concept of scuffing feet along the ocean floor rather than walking normally. How common are stonefish in muri beach?

Bula!!! 🌸

I’d love some recommendations on a future fiji trip.
Going for 4 nights. The idea is to stay on the mainland for one night, two nights on an island maybe Yasawa and one night back on the mainland before flying home. I’m not looking for resort, i’m very happy to do airbnb, small family owned accommodation. I don’t know how I feel about the shared meals with other guests though, I see that’s quite common on the airbnbs. What would you suggest?

Please would like to know the best way to get to Yasawa Islands from the mainland too.

Hey please help me

I am using notes from a research paper who quote other scholars in their paper for example John (2007) says XYZ. If I am paraphrasing this information in my own writing, is it still correct to say John (2007) says XYZ and then use in-text citations to cite the author (Author, 2025) so it would look something like “ John (2007) says black beans are bad (Depp, 2025) ?

Please look out for these UTI (Urinary Tract Infection) signs in your daughter to know if they have contracted a UTI and need to be seen by a healthcare professional. Do not ignore the signs. Especially girl dads who might be less familiar with UTI and its symptoms. UTIs are serious and can be dangerous if left untreated.

Symptoms to look out for

- needing to use the bathroom more frequently but passing little urine or none at all
- having more accidents before they can get to the toilet or letting you know they need to get to the toilet
- complaining that their private area hurts while urinating or at other times
- walking awkwardly due to discomfort
- ammonia smelling urine

female living alone for four years and you’d think i was used to it by now but nope, I am still as afraid as the first time I moved in to the place. Beautiful home, apparently safe area and i’m still so scared to be living on my own. All the stories that I read of horrifying break ins and other assaults just makes me so scared. I just don’t feel like it’s going to get easier, I do what i’m suppose to do to be as safe as I can be but it’s not stopped the way that I feel. I wish there was something that could just take this fear and anxiety away. It’s even scarier because I have my child too... and No unfortunately I can’t get a dog. I just don’t know what’s going to help me, any sudden noise I hear just freaks me out and I keep wanting to call the police every time I hear a noise but I know how ridiculous that is. Never thought i’d be living with so much fear at my young age when most people my age are so care free.

I just want someone to protect me after years of doing everything I can to protect myself. I hate living in fear and I sometimes think if I had. significant other then maybe i’d feel less scared living alone. I wish I could have somebody to rely on to be there and protect me, i’d never completely rely on someone for everything especially because i’ve been on my own for so long but I just mean i’d like to be with someone who makes me feel safe. The last relationship I was in I felt everything but safe, tbh he’d probably willingly put me in more danger than i’d ever need to be. Just those late night thoughts on my own just wishing to have someone there. How do I move past this and begin to live comfortably on my own without feeling fear that the worst is going to happen? I become particularly paranoid at night when I hear all sorts of noises. Do you have any advice for me?

I hate hearing it because it makes me feel really sad, uncomfortable and let down. I’m a solo mom as in i’m both single but also an only parent, it’s been this way since pregnancy. There was a long history of domestic violence, I made the choice to get out and stay out.

It’s been years since i’ve talked to a man, I haven’t dated since or even mingled. There’s a lot of things that stop me such as not having any trust in people, the whole history of domestic violence, not wanting just anyone around my child… But I hear all of the time that no man would want to be the father of another mans kid because they’ll always know it’s not their kid and they didn’t make the kid with you. While it might be true, I really hope it’s not true for all men. One day I really do hope to meet a good man who loves both my child and I, I deserve to be loved and have a healthy relationship after what I went through and my child also deserves to be loved and accepted regardless of who their father is or isn’t. I didn’t choose to be abused, yeah I absolutely could’ve chosen a better father for my child and I’ve had guilt for a long time but i’ve done everything to give my child a life that is so full of love, support, kindness, emotional stability, everything that their little self needs to thrive because I owe it to them, I never want them to ever feel like they’ve missed out on anything.

I just want to know where you stand with that sort of statement?

I requested my file to be locked awhile ago which was done including adding a passcode on the file due to safety concerns as a dv survivor. Recently the call centre has stopped asking me for my passcode and no longer seek approval from a manager before accessing my file. Why would this have been removed when I never personally requested it? I did call, I did ask the question and no answer was given just that they don’t know 🤷‍♂️. They said I can go into the office and request to lock my file (it can’t be done on the phone) which I already did do a good couple of months ago - hence the question why was it removed without my approval? I would have liked to atleast be told they removed the extra safety on my file considering the whole reason why I asked for it to be put on. Could any WINZ workers chime in? thanks

How early do you start planning (and paying) in the year for your child’s birthday party?

i’m hoping though a long shot, that someone would be able to lend me $100 which would be paid back over the next two weeks. I’m really short of money and have two bills that really need to be paid. I live in New Zealand so assume that’ll make it pretty tricky, only can do bank transfers as I do not have any of the other methods.

An educator at the childcare centre that my child attends is usually welcoming and kind towards me but in recent times they’ve become cold shouldered, ignoring conversation and not their usual self. I’ve noticed that this is only happening with me. If I’ve done something wrong, I couldn’t bullet point what it would be, I feel uncomfortable with this uncertainty and not knowing why things have all of a sudden changed. Im not sure if it is worth asking the educator, or to leave it.

An educator at the childcare centre that my child attends is usually welcoming and kind towards me but in recent times they’ve become cold shouldered, ignoring conversation and not their usual self. I’ve noticed that this is only happening with me. If I’ve done something wrong, I couldn’t bullet point what it would be, I feel uncomfortable with this uncertainty and not knowing why things have all of a sudden changed. Im not sure if it is worth asking the educator, or to leave it.

An educator at the centre is usually welcoming and kind towards me but in recent times they’ve become cold shouldered, ignoring conversation and not their usual self. I’ve noticed that this is only happening with me. If I’ve done something wrong, I couldn’t bullet point what it would be, I feel uncomfortable with this uncertainty and not knowing why things have all of a sudden changed. I want to assume the worst because my brain is conditioned to do so but I do not know what I could have done.

Context: Human error': Police gave address of woman under protection order to ex-partner

I have a protection order against my ex partner and since before the order I moved away and have done everything to create safety walls around my life to prevent him ever having access again. Seeing this article was very unsettling because you would think something like this would never happen. I mean how could you think to give an abuser personal details of the victim when the abusers name would have been easily visible on the protection order that would have been on this woman’s file… now that this article has been published and many people would have seen it, I can’t help it but think that this would give abusers some sort of leverage, or give them the idea that they can access their victim through requesting personal information.

I’m not sure what to do in my case because I feel very anxious, I would be a great risk if my abuser was able to access any personal information of myself. I am sure today many women and male victims would feel the same way that I am feeling about this. what can I do that I haven’t already done to be even more safer?

i’m a solo mum (single and sole/only parent, clarifying cause it gets confused sometimes) to my child since the earliest stages.

The last couple of months, my child has been hitting me when they are annoyed. Each time I tell them that it is not nice, please do not hit me. I don’t think that it’s working 😅 Any advice? They are such a sweet, loving child who is very caring and comforts anyone who is upset or hurting so I know this isn’t in their nature to want to hurt anyone.

a few days ago, I made a really stupid mistake when I had posted a tiktok that was meant to go to “only for me” onto my private account with a couple of followers. The video had footage of my child’s face in it who i’ve never posted online, never showed any photos of or anything to anybody besides a very small amount of trusted people. As a DV (domestic violence) survivor, who has kept my child completely away from any thing where my abuser could find us, I was so worried and anxious that someone has been able to see the video within the time before I had deleted it off of my account. My abuser, who I left when I was still pregnant has never met or seen my child because of DV. It’s been a few years now.

Before it had posted, I realised that it was getting posted to followers and so I kept waiting for it to completely post so that I could delete it immediately. I deleted the video maybe within five seconds, and it showed 0 views just before I had deleted it but I know how tiktok is and i’ve experienced being able to watch someone’s full video even when it has been deleted, just won’t let you like/comment. I’m more worried because I know even deleted tiktoks still show up when you’ve already had it loaded such as refreshing when someone posts.
Truthfully, there are some followers on there who I would never ever share my personal life with and I know if they got access to that footage, they would definitely save or screenshot it to send onto my abuser. So i’m just feeling really unwell about it all. I’ve since deleted my tiktok account and will not use it again.

a few days ago, I made a really stupid mistake when I had posted a tiktok that was meant to go to “only for me” onto my private account with a couple of followers. The video had footage of my child’s face in it who i’ve never posted online, never showed any photos of or anything to anybody besides a very small amount of trusted people. As a DV (domestic violence) survivor, who has kept my child completely away from any thing where my abuser could find us, I was so worried and anxious that someone has been able to see the video within the time before I had deleted it off of my account. My abuser, who I left when I was still pregnant has never met or seen my child because of DV. It’s been a few years now.

Before it had posted, I realised that it was getting posted to followers and so I kept waiting for it to completely post so that I could delete it immediately. I deleted the video maybe within five seconds, and it showed 0 views just before I had deleted it but I know how tiktok is and i’ve experienced being able to watch deleted tiktok’s from other people just not being able to like/comment on it. Does anyone know how tiktok works? if the five seconds window would’ve meant no one could’ve possibly loaded and saw it? I’m more worried because I know even deleted tiktoks still show up when you’ve already had it loaded such as refreshing your page.
Truthfully, there are some followers on there who I would never ever share my personal life with and I know if they got access to that footage, they would definitely save or screenshot it to send onto my abuser. So i’m just feeling really unwell about it all. The advice i’m asking for is basically how will I know if it’s been seen, and what can I do if anything?. I’ve since deleted my tiktok account and will not use it again.

TIKTOK
feeling genuinely so worried. I was meant to post a video to “only for me”, the post contained some footage of my young daughter who i’ve never posted online due to domestic v\]olence reasons. As soon as I realised (within 5 sec of the video published) I deleted it immediately, and it still showed 0 views but I know tiktok still does show videos to followers even AFTER it’s been deleted. I’m really worried because for three years i’ve never posted any photo of my child’s face and I just made the silliest mistake posting it to followers. Please reassure me that no one would have seen it once I deleted it. It really does affect me because like I said i’ve gone through domestic v\]olence.