u/Questioner4lyfe2020

For a 36-year-old with this history—May 2023 ASC-US/high-risk HPV+ (16/18/45 negative), July 2023 colposcopy/biopsies showing inflammation but no CIN/dysplasia; September 2024 NILM/normal Pap and high-risk HPV negative; and August 2026 NILM/normal Pap with high-risk HPV positive but 16/18/45 negative—is another immediate colposcopy typically recommended in 2026, or would repeat HPV/Pap testing in 1 year usually be appropriate? What have people with a similar positive → negative → positive history experienced?

Hi everyone,

I’m looking for some advice from anyone who’s been through something similar.

My DACA renewal has been pending since March 2026, and my current DACA/EAD expires at the end of December 2026.

I recently met with my immigration attorney because my company is planning an international work offsite in Portugal in February 2027, and I would need my renewal approved before I can even move forward with the travel authorization process.

Their recommendation was to wait a little longer, but if we don’t hear anything from USCIS over the next month or two, they recommend filing a writ of mandamus to force USCIS to make a decision. The downside is that they’re quoting me $4,000 just for the lawsuit.

I’m trying to decide whether it’s worth spending that kind of money or whether I should continue waiting.

A few questions for anyone who’s been in this situation:

• Has anyone here filed a writ of mandamus for a delayed DACA renewal?
• If so, how long had your case been pending before you filed?
• How quickly did USCIS respond after the lawsuit was filed?
• Did USCIS approve your case, deny it, or simply make a decision?
• If you were in my shoes, would you wait another month or two, or would you start preparing the lawsuit now?
• Has anyone had a renewal take this long and still get approved without having to sue?

I’m not looking for legal advice—I’m already working with an attorney. I’m mostly trying to hear real experiences from people who’ve dealt with unusually long DACA renewal delays and whether a mandamus ended up being worth it.

Thanks in advance—I really appreciate any insight.

Both late 30s.

I (F) matched with a man from the UK in early June. I live in a major East Coast city, and he was already planning to visit at the end of June for a week. We planned to meet while he was here.

The connection was instantly and intensely sexual. This isn’t something I normally do, but for three weeks we had an extremely intense digital sexting relationship.
We never spoke on the phone, but communicated almost daily through Snapchat, disappearing photos/videos, messages, and voice notes. We’d sext for an hour or more while working, during his train rides, before bed, basically whenever we could find time.
I was genuinely fine with this being casual and sexual. I wasn’t secretly hoping to turn him into a boyfriend. In my mind, the sexting was building anticipation for eventually meeting in person.

Before meeting, I asked for a few things around sexual health and safety: recent STI testing for both of us, ongoing consent, and a quick non-sexual phone call beforehand. At first he said he didn’t like rules because “rules are not fun,” but eventually agreed.

Toward the end of the three weeks, about a day before I assumed he’d be flying in, I made one final ask: that we go on an actual date while he was here. Again, I wasn’t asking for commitment. I just wanted to meet for drinks/food before taking things further physically.

He didn’t respond.

I eventually sent one light, flirty follow-up. He opened it and didn’t answer.

Then the week of his supposed trip arrived. Five days passed while he was supposedly in my city, and I heard absolutely nothing from him. We went from intensely sexting almost every day for three weeks to complete silence. After almost a week, I blocked him.

I know that probably sounds like a strong emotional reaction to a casual situation, but I was genuinely hurt. So much anticipation and sexual tension had built up, and I really wanted to finally meet and touch this person in real life.

For additional context, he seemed like a guy who travels and has casual sex with women. I knew that and genuinely didn’t care. During our three weeks of talking, he told me he’d slept with someone on a trip to Portugal. We weren’t exclusive, so my response was essentially: fine, just get tested before we meet and share the results, and I’ll do the same.

It’s now been 10 days since I blocked him. I’ve kept him blocked, deactivated Snapchat, deleted our photos/screenshots, and tried to move forward.

But I still cannot logically reconcile three weeks of intense, consistent daily sexual interaction with suddenly disappearing exactly when meeting was supposed to become real.

I keep wondering: Did he only want a virtual sexting relationship? Did he never actually intend to meet? Did the sexual health boundaries or date make meeting feel like too much effort? Did he meet someone else? Did something happen? Or did he simply get what he wanted from the virtual relationship and move on?
I can’t help feeling confused and used.

Why do you think he disappeared? Would you have blocked him? Would you keep him blocked?

TL;DR: Matched with a man from the UK in early June who was already planning to visit my city at the end of the month for a week. We had an intense sexting relationship for three weeks—no phone calls, but daily Snapchat messages, disappearing photos/videos, voice notes, and sexting sessions that often lasted 1–1.5 hours. I was genuinely fine with casual sex and wasn’t seeking a relationship. He agreed to my boundaries, including STI testing, consent, a phone call, and eventually going on an actual date when he came to my city. When I finally asked him to make plans for the date, he stopped responding. I followed up once, he opened it and ignored me, and after almost a week of silence, including five days when he was supposedly in my city, I blocked him. It’s been 10 days and I’m still struggling to understand WTF happened.

Both late 30s.
I (F) matched with a man from the UK in early June. I live in a major East Coast city, and he was already planning to visit at the end of June for a week. We planned to meet while he was here.
The connection was instantly and intensely sexual. This isn’t something I normally do, but for three weeks we had an extremely intense digital sexting relationship.
We never spoke on the phone, but communicated almost daily through Snapchat, disappearing photos/videos, messages, and voice notes. We’d sext for an hour or more while working, during his train rides, before bed—basically whenever we could find time.
I was genuinely fine with this being casual and sexual. I wasn’t secretly hoping to turn him into a boyfriend. In my mind, the sexting was building anticipation for eventually meeting in person.
Before meeting, I asked for a few things around sexual health and safety: recent STI testing for both of us, ongoing consent, and a quick non-sexual phone call beforehand.
At first he said he didn’t like rules because “rules are not fun,” but eventually agreed.
Toward the end of the three weeks, about a day before I assumed he’d be flying in, I made one final ask: that we go on an actual date while he was here. Again, I wasn’t asking for commitment. I just wanted to meet for drinks/food before taking things further physically.
He didn’t respond.
I eventually sent one light, flirty follow-up. He opened it and didn’t answer.
Then the week of his supposed trip arrived. Five days passed while he was supposedly in my city, and I heard absolutely nothing from him.
We went from intensely sexting almost every day for three weeks to complete silence.
After almost a week, I blocked him.
I know that probably sounds like a strong emotional reaction to a casual situation, but I was genuinely hurt. So much anticipation and sexual tension had built up, and I really wanted to finally meet and touch this person in real life.

For additional context, he seemed like a guy who travels and has casual sex with women. I knew that and genuinely didn’t care. During our three weeks of talking, he told me he’d slept with someone on a trip to Portugal. We weren’t exclusive, so my response was essentially: fine, just get tested before we meet and share the results, and I’ll do the same.
It’s now been 10 days since I blocked him. I’ve kept him blocked, deactivated Snapchat, deleted our photos/screenshots, and tried to move forward.
But I still cannot logically reconcile three weeks of intense, consistent daily sexual interaction with suddenly disappearing exactly when meeting was supposed to become real.

I keep wondering: Did he only want a virtual sexting relationship? Did he never actually intend to meet? Did the sexual health boundaries or date make meeting feel like too much effort? Did he meet someone else? Did something happen? Or did he simply get what he wanted from the virtual relationship and move on?
I can’t help feeling confused and used. Looking back, I feel like I accidentally turned myself into a temporary unpaid OF girl when I thought we were mutually building anticipation toward meeting in person.
I don’t want to chase him for answers. I’ve done that with men in the past, and it has never gotten me the closure I wanted.

I know nobody can tell me exactly what happened. I’m specifically interested in men’s perspectives on the behavior.

Why do you think he disappeared? Would you have blocked him? Would you keep him blocked?

TL;DR: Matched with a man from the UK in early June who was already planning to visit my city at the end of the month for a week. We had an intense sexting relationship for three weeks—no phone calls, but daily Snapchat messages, disappearing photos/videos, voice notes, and sexting sessions that often lasted 1–1.5 hours. I was genuinely fine with casual sex and wasn’t seeking a relationship. He agreed to my boundaries, including STI testing, consent, a phone call, and eventually going on an actual date when he came to my city. When I finally asked him to make plans for the date, he stopped responding. I followed up once, he opened it and ignored me, and after almost a week of silence—including five days when he was supposedly in my city—I blocked him. It’s been 10 days and I’m still struggling to understand WTF happened.**

My company is planning an all-company offsite/training in Portugal in January/February 2027 and these are mandatory sessions. I know I can tell them I won't be able to attend for immigration reasons or make up something and can get out of not attending but I am so damn tired of DACA restrictions I just want to give this a try.

I’m a current DACA recipient, so the only way I’d be able to attend would be through Advance Parole (if work travel is approved).

For those who’ve gone through the process recently:

• Has anyone been approved for Advance Parole specifically for a work trip? If yes, has it been recently?
• If so, what documentation did USCIS want from your employer?
• How long did your Advance Parole application take from filing to approval?
• Did you have any issues re-entering the U.S.?
• Given the current administration, would you personally attempt it, or would you skip the trip?

Just trying to gauge whether this is realistic or if it’s not worth the risk. Thanks!

I am an ISO. I have seen many comments/questions regarding the order in which applications are processed and complains about "my friend applied at the same time I did but his case was approved faster". So I wanted to shed some light on the process.

The general rule is FIRST COME, FIRST SERVED. But there are some caveats and distinctions. One of the most important: is this a paper or an electronic application?

Imagine an assembly line. An application/petition has to make several stops before reaching the ISO who will make the final decision. If there is an issue along the way, the flow will get disrupted. This is particularly important in paper files. Because if there is a bump in the process at any time, the file will not be able to catch up with the other ones filed on the same day (again, think of an assembly line). If the application is an electronic one, once the bump is resolved, the application can still be adjudicated the with other ones filed on the same day.

Another thing to keep in mind is the SPECIFIC type of benefit. There are approximately 30 different types of work permits (Form I-765) and they can be processed at different locations. Don't compare a c09 EAD with an a03 EAD.

Some cases need to be adjudicated at the Field Office (FO). Each FO's timeline will depend on the staffing and the amount of cases they receive. That varies greatly.

Some cases get ahead of the line because they are "guinea pigs". We are constantly testing new and different ways of processing cases. They could be streamlined of they meet certain criteria. Other cases get processed faster because they might be part of a class action (let's say "children of left handed soccer players who incarcerated by a Madagascar dictator"). There is also the possibility that case got pulled due to an investigation not related to the applicant (imagine someone else made a typo on an A# that matched the applicant and during the investigation the ISO pulled the applicant's case - since you already reviewed the case to figure out the problem, might as well adjudicate it).

There are other scenarios but I don't have time to type more. I am going to bed.

Hope this helps.

UES apartment. Lost hot water Wednesday morning around 9am. It’s now Saturday morning and we still don’t have actual hot water, just barely lukewarm water after 72+ hours.

Management sent multiple vague PDF notices saying they were “working on it” and that the boiler company was onsite, but nothing has actually been fixed. This is also the THIRD hot water outage in THREE MONTHS.

Filed a 311 complaint yesterday, but inspectors came while I was at work and now it’s a holiday weekend so apparently everything is delayed.

Management has barely communicated outside canned responses and acts annoyed whenever tenants call asking for updates.

At what point do people start demanding hotel reimbursement or rent abatements for this stuff?

TL;DR: NYC apartment has had no real hot water for 72+ hours, management keeps sending vague boiler update PDFs instead of fixing it, and now it’s Memorial Day weekend. Third outage in 3 months. Filed with 311 already.

What advice would you give candidates preparing for this interview that is designed to evaluate reasoning, values, judgment, and communication style rather than purely technical/job-specific skills?

A few things I’m especially curious about:

1. What tends to differentiate strong candidates?

2. How do these interviews differ from standard behavioral interviews?

3. What kinds of mistakes do candidates commonly make?

4. Is it better to focus more on the company’s mission/research, or more on authentic reflection and thoughtful communication?

5. Any tips for preparing without sounding overly rehearsed?

Not looking for confidential questions, mostly trying to better understand the mindset and interview style. Would really appreciate any insights from people who’ve been through these kinds of processes.

Any use Claude for Excel and if so, any training videos/courses available online to learn?

Yesterday (April 30th) I had a bad experience when it was time for me to board the plane. First of all they asked everyone either for an ID or passport right at the gate in order to go on the plane (this had nothing to do with TSA) so I provide my documentation along with my plane ticket at the gate, they let me and on the way to get to the actual plane hiding were a bunch of ice agents detaining everyone that looked foreign, discriminating entire families and asking everybody where they’re from. I thought it was normal police until they asked me where I’m from and I said that im a us citizen and they let me go but with others that spoke other languages or looked from another country were stopped and questioned.

I don’t know if this is a normal thing or if it was this particular flight but it was a terrifying experience for the passengers that had their documents with them and were being discriminated against.