u/Select-Chip-2606

They message me when they want to vent about something. I'm there for them, I'm the shoulder to cry on. They tell me how much I matter to them.

But the second I want to see them or talk to them otherwise they ignore me, get angry with me, talk shit about me to others.

I don't tell them my problems the way they do to me. I just exist and they don't like me. They leave me out of shit and are happier around their other friends.

I have two people left and they are doing the same now.

I know I'm the problem. I just want people to like me.

I'm such a shitty person I know. All my friends keep leaving me. I have two friends left and they are beginning to distance themselves from me. Intentionally not inviting me to stuff, cutting me off from drinking when they drink.

They only seem to want me around when they vent.

Everyone keeps leaving me because I'm such a shitty person. I don't know what I should do with my life. If I can't have any good relationships with family or friends why do I even exist or matter?

I've known them for five years. In the past year we've grown very close, but they are beginning to try and distance themselves from me and get more frustrated with me often.

I want them to be happy. And if that means that they leave me. Then they should leave me. I take up too much of their time and get them in trouble.

I don't know how to let them go. They are all I have.

Went out drinking a few nights ago and got absolutely plastered. I had a friend with me who counted my drinks. I put in an online BAC calculator the amount I had (8-10 7% drinks, 2 pornstar shots and several drinks I got from friends which I did not calculate) at 130 lbs in the 5 hours I was drinking, apparently I was sitting at 0.33 BAC on the low end. I was not even close to throwing up by the end of the party, still jumping and singing at closing time. How accurate is the BAC calculator?

I am in a group chat with several of my friends. Very diverse range of ages. One person in the groupchat I'm not particularly close with has shown... interest in me. They are the oldest of the group at 20 and I'm the youngest still a minor for a year and a half. They routinely send hearts in messages, message me about wanting cuddles and generally just being weird while I'm in a call with the others. This wasn't bad until the other day.

Yesteray, she was in call with my best friend (18F). She kept asking where I was in what my friend described as "a whiny voice". My friend then heard "wet tapping noises and heavy breathing from the 20 yo's microphone" between asking where I was. Me and my friend are very open about stuff regarding romance and sexuality (I'm aroace so she knows I don't think of her as anything other than platonically). I tried to suggest it was anything but, but she insisted that "she knows what masturbation sounds like, she's a girl, that was 100% what she was doing."

After this I joined the call. The 20 yo muted up because "her mom told her she was being too loud" (time zones it was midnight for her). My friend left and the 20 yo insisted on staying muted and just typing while I talked. No I'm not stupid, I know what she was doing.

I would leave the gc and block her but I have close friends in the gc, some of which she introduced me too.

What the fuck do I do?

Update: I messaged a friend who is closer to her than me. He shared me DMs of that night. She may have been having a mental health episode. She messaged him about hurting and feeling stuff under her skin and apologizing, wanting to take her skin off. I'm not 100% what to believe and I'm going to talk to my bsf about it to try and get further opinions.

This is an online friend so I'm rather skeptical. I'm going to keep this vague as I don't know if they are on reddit or not. I've known them for roughly a month and today they dropped a story.

Keeping it vague their "body" as they put it was apparently possesed 5 years ago by 7 spirits who live in their body. I was of course thinking it was a joke, however as they continued talking I pieced together many things which are consistent with before they told me the story. For instance one "soul" considers a seperate friend a big brother, and they'll sometimes refer to them as a big brother and other times as their name or as a little brother or friend. I also noticed sometimes they appeared into me. They'd send hearts privately or talk about how they love guys with long hair (I have long hair) or how they need cuddles. Other times they have no interest.

What scares me is that they have told stories which are incredibly traumatic including parental abuse and SA.

I asked a friend whos known them for a lot longer and they confirmed they've done it as long as they've known them. I came to the same conclusion in that if it brings them comfort Im fine. I want to know if they are faking it as that is something I do not approve of.

How can I be sure?

Update: one of their "spirits" is the soul of an 8-9 year old. They are talking in a child accent and they have been for roughly 3 hours. Honestly have no idea what the fuck is happening.

I have been thinking about my sexuality a lot lately.

I don't know what I am. I feel like I may be Aroace or gray. But I really don't know.

I don't feel any attraction to anyone. Once in a blue moon I might feel the tiniest thing. Maybe a "oh that person is kind of hot, it would be great if I was into that though." Or if I'm very lucky my heart may skip a beat a little bit if I find out they are crushing on me. Usually this is when I'm high. I feel so shit about not feeling attraction to people, but I don't know if I'm ace or just young.

How do I figure this out?

I'm 16. I've been contemplating commiting suicide since I was 8. But I have never gone through with it. I've had the notes written, dates planned, method plotted out, but never done it. Whether it be someone is in the house when I want to commit or a friend messaging me needing help or messaging me to tell me they care about me.

I talked to someone today. They were telling me stories of friends who attempted. I feel like my problems are invalid because I haven't attempted. I'm scared I'm overreacting or doing it for attention.

I am 16. Since I was 8 I have severely struggled with mental health. I have had my notes written and have had date and times set to attempt. But I haven't attempted yet. It may be that someone is in the house, or someone messages me out of the blue telling me that they care about me. I end up not going through with it.

I was talking with someone today and they were telling me stories of people they knew who attempted. I feel like my struggles aren't valid and that it's all in my head or attention seeking.

This is moreso just a vent post than anything

I can feel that she is groing distant, and I fear that I am being a burden to her, and putting her in risky situations when it comes to substances. I think that if I cut her off, it will be better for her. I do not care about myself, I just want whats best for her.

We have been friends for roughly 5 years. We did take a break at one point when she got into a relationship. We have grown extremely close over the past year, to the point where there, naturally, are dating allegations. I don't care and neither does she.

However, for the past while I feel that I am a black sheep. I feel that I shouldn't be hanging out with her because of who I am. I am not in the best health, and many people do not like me (for good reason). I don't want to give people bad opinions about her because of being around me. I fear it already is happening

I can also feel her growing distant. We used to hang everyday, and now we hang out once every week to once every two weeks

I think if I cut myself off, it will be way healthier for her and thats what I want. I already have spent many a years alone so I think I'll be fine (probably)