u/Sendpiecks

So it's obviously way too soon to tell if this med is a good fit, I started this medication five days ago along with lamictal. I've been chronically depressed most of my life, with spits of hypomania here and there. I'm bipolar 2.

My main gripe with depression is that I generally don't care about anything. I float through life, my room hadn't been cleaned since 2025, I didn't care that I was bailing on friends, and when I did force myself to see people I felt nothing. I generally have to mask because of how flat my affect was due to depression. I got into a car accident a couple months ago and I literally didn't care. I was just like, oh ok that happened, and mutually agreed with the person who hit me to "not deal with the police" despite the damage done to my car.

Anyways, I'm on day five and HOLY SHIT! I care about things again! I literally cried yesterday because of how much I've lost due to depression. I'm rekindling old friendships and suddenly very driven to performing well in my career. I look forward to the future! It is so strange feeling so grateful and at peace. My brain is no longer dull.

Again, I know it's too soon to tell. Maybe it's triggering hypomania and I'll feel like shit again next week. But wow I'll take it.

If you are trained in ABA therapy, or have work with nonverbal children, PLEASE help me out.

(You can skip this paragraph if you want, but it gives insight on my little experience) I'm about to start ESY next week. Last school year was my first year as a para with ESS, and no offense, but ESS didn't really prepare me for anything. Despite that, I eased in, and did OK for my first year. I had a 5th grader with high functioning Autism and ADHD. All I really did most of the year was redirect him back to his work, deal with constant disruptions, and very rarely, aggressive behavior.

I was warned at the end of the school year that my student I was assigned for ESY is "very difficult", and I'm worried. Not because he's "difficult" (not my words, and I don't really like that wording) but because I don't feel very prepared. All I know is that he's non-verbal, entering first grade next year, and is a big eloper/biter.

I have no experience working with non-verbal students. I have no experience working with a kid that young. I have no idea what an autism classroom, nonetheless first grade classroom, looks like (I did ERI in the school year). I'll condense below what I'd love advice on.

-How to manage and work with him on eloping
-How to communicate with a nonverbal first grader
-Idk exactly, any advice helps...

I'm really worried and unprepared. I want to improve this little guys life, and hate that he's dubbed as "difficult" when apparently his teacher got fired for letting him be on a tablet all year long because she didn't want to deal with him. Poor kid is probably extremely regressed. Any good resources to study or tips? I am not ABA trained. I am CPI trained, that's all. I start Monday next week.

i will eventually delete this post because i'm paranoid of somebody who works in the same district as me seeing this lol. but i need to get this out there because this is honestly insane to me.

i work in an ERI room. i'm a first year para. one of the other paras in my room has a 4th grader kid with adhd, odd and dyslexia (he probably has autism as well but he's not diagnosed).

this kid can get extremely violent at times. It's usually twice a month. on my first day, i watched him strangle an aide. i've seen him spit, bite, scream, curse, strangle, pretty much anything you can name.

I just found out that apparently last year, he had beaten the fuck out of his aide to the point of multiple ribs being broken. During music class in front of many other kids and another teacher.

Yet, he's still here in a public school setting?? I'm new to all of this so maybe I'm missing something but this makes absolute ZERO sense to me. There are other kids in the class who have aggressive behaviors, but none to as severe of a degree as this kid. We can deescelate the other students, and it doesn't get as severe as this. THIS kid will go for HOURS, and it's like he becomes a totally different person.

Some backround info, he is on a cocktail of meds including antipsychotics, sees two separate therapists and has an absolute unit of a para with CPI, RBT and BT training so it's not like he's receiving a lack of support. He's receiving as much help as he possibly can get, yet once he's triggered, we have to evacuate the entire class out into the hallway while two aides restrain him because he gets incredibly dangerous. Sometimes we've waited for two hours for him to be deescelated.

I don't understand how a student like this is still in a public school setting. What's the bar??? Almost killing somebody? which literally almost happened already a year ago?

Our teacher quit last month unexpectedly and the new hire is a really tiny lady. He's just going to hurt more staff and the school will just let him get away with it and give no consequences. The most he's ever gotten was a daily suspension during the year I've been here. Principal and case worker give him whatever he wants when he's about to have a behavior because they don't want to deal with it, and the principal has actually gotten mad at us for "giving him so many reports" when he literally ASKED for them earlier in the year.

We receive no support and I'm kinda just done. I will return next year, but I will also not hesitate to quit if shit derails. I have a handle on the aggressive behaviors and think i'm decent at my job, but this severe aggression from this other student and nothing ever being done about it drives me crazy.

I work in an ERI classroom with 4th and 5th graders, and this is my first year.

My student is a great kid, I really do love him a lot. Most of the year felt alright. He had very few behaviors, and mostly struggled with getting distracted and needed redirection.

April was when things suddenly started going downhill with his overall mood and attitude towards school. His usual silliness and consistent smile started slipping away. He's grown a little more moody and isn't as nice and sweet as he used to be. His behaviors went from very rarely, to maybe once or twice a week... and now, it's like every other day. Fact is, he's regressed.

I think a large part of it is the fact that he has developed an extremely poor sleep schedule. He stays up late, and has even admitted to pulling all-nighters a few times too, playing video games all night. He has unlimited access to his phone and a serious screen addiction, and lack of sleep is a massive contribution to behaviors. It's frustrating, because his mom has been made well aware of this, but she's a single mom and honestly I think she's afraid of him and too busy to really enforce rules. Mom tried to take his phone away once because he slept all week during school, and he ended up punching her. His behavior seemingly descented ever since.

My student becomes defiant when he's tired. Everything is always met with no, and it's actually really atypical to how he was most of the year. He doesn't want a break, but he also won't do his work, and starts being extremely disruptive and unsafe with his body, and has a very low frustration tolerance. I feel like he's forcing himself to stay awake because I asked him to take a nap and it really feels like there's no getting him to listen when he's like that.

I know defiance is common working with special ed students, but honestly, I don't know how to handle it most of the time. I'm a first year para in a room with kids that have aggressive behaviors. I really want to help him because i DO care about him, but damn it I don't know what to do right now.
He really wasn't like this most of the year, but he's regressing a lot right now and I kind of like I'm failing him because I don't know how to navigate through this as I had literally no prior experience to this before working at this school. I got hired by a company that seemingly hires anyone with a pulse because they're desperate for paras, and most are floaters or quit.

they put me with this kid because they'd been looking for a permanent aide for him for weeks. I applied in late September and got the job almost immediately.

I was honestly terrified when I first started, I work in a tough classroom and was shocked by the degree of severity in behavior from the other students, but I absolutely loved the kids. They're all a great bunch and that was what made me want to stick around.

But after seeing my students rapid decline I've realized that loving them is not enough. I either have to get better at this or not return next year. I've been really sad by this realization. I feel like it's my fault. Maybe he wouldn't have regressed like this if he had a more qualified aide.

I was trying hard most of this year to learn but honestly I've become kind of burnt out and I'm not as focused as I used to be at work. I've been performing like SHIT because i'm running on fumes.

tldr, i'm an unqualified aide and I feel like a fuckup. My student and I had a strong bond for most of this year and was a rather easy kid, but he has regressed and I feel like it's my fault and that I'm not helping as much as I could. I feel like a major disservice despite my efforts and I'm not sure if I'll return next year despite my passion for my kid and the other kids. Like I said earlier, love is not enough, I either have to improve my skills and learn more this summer or leave.

first year para looking for advice for my audhd student, we'll call him Jack. He's significantly regressing and I hate to say it, but a lot of it has to do with what's going on at home.

His mom's a single mother. I believe she separated from her husband last year. So for this school year, she's been having Jack's YOUNGER brother care for him after school, cooking him dinner, packing lunch and whatnot. This is where I feel like an asshole if I were to report this. If I had to guess, his mom's working a lot to provide financially and that's why she's not really in the picture.

Like I said in the first paragraph, Jack's been regressing a lot this year and has been coming in every week smelling worse and worse. You can smell him from five feet away, and it will make you tear up if he gets close. I truly don't think he's showered in months. There's no way he's showered in months. It's gotten to a point where he's itchy everywhere and can't focus on his work because he has to scratch himself and says his itchiness is painful.

Of course he has no structure at home, so he has free reign to do whatever the fuck he wants, which is play videogames and binge youtube shorts. His executive functioning has become more and more fucked, and sometimes he'll pull all-nighters gaming so he'll come in to school and fall asleep right away. I've been advised by the teacher to just let him sleep, and one day he slept until school ended, only getting up for lunch. Full 6 hours of sleep.

Getting in touch with his mom is impossible. She has not responded to any email a staff member has sent to her unless it's an email that SHE is sending (which is almost never). I know I'm just a first year and I still have so much to learn. But there is a very strong special supports services here at this school; therapists, BTs, and extremely qualified aides. Yet my/our work feels futile. He's stopped caring about school, has become noncompliant and defiant, and stims loudly all day with NO BREAK, which triggers some of the other students...

I feel a special type of anger for this situation because unfortunately it hits close to home and it's a little triggering. growing up, my mom thought that being a good parent meant providing food and shelter, and I not only didn't have a connection with her but she also neglected all of my other needs, especially medical, as I'm neurodivergent as well. i only got the help I needed after a the guidance counselor at my high school called my mom and straight up threatened to call CPS if this continued as I was really suffering and struggling in school. Maybe that's what his mom needs? I don't know.

Again, it feels like a dick move to call CPS on a burnt out mom. But something needs to give... right? I feel like I'm out of options and i'm so worried about Jack's future.

Hi all. Sorry if this post is long, I'm extremely passionate about my student and I want to cover all bases. I'm in my first ever year of being a para and I got put in an ERI room. I have been so lucky to be assigned a kid who I'll call Jack in this post. Jack is an AUDHD student who's a funny, intelligent and overall sweet boy. I've grown really fond of him and we clicked immediately, as we a very similar line of interests.

I was told when I started that he's in an ERI room because rarely, he can get very aggressive and verbal. He only had one aggressive incident earlier this year and 90% of the time is very collected. I feel I've got a pretty decent grasp on how to help him all year; giving him structure, ample breaks, generally talking him through things, and he lets me help him. Most days have been successful. But in the past month or two, something has changed.

He's always struggled with executive functioning (typical for adhd lol, I have adhd too so I knew how to work with him through it) but lately it's like he doesn't care at all anymore. He puts absolute bare minimum into his work because "it doesn't matter since he's not graded". Sometimes, I'd have him re-do assignments and work with him through it and he'd get it done. But lately he's gotten pretty argumentative and will just say he's too lazy to do it. He's gone from being a sweet boy to a pretty mean kid. Not saying that's who he is, but this switch-up is concerning.

He's been coming into school extremely smelly and itchy. I don't think he's been showering. He will fall asleep in class, which we found out is because he pulls all-nighters playing video games. He's slowly losing his usual smiley, talkative demeanor and he's developed a really negative attitude for school. He goes on these long rants while completing work, talking about how if he's president he would ban school, how he should be getting paid to do this, how there's no point to anything etc.

I've always been rather sweet with him (and still am) but lately I've been doing less gentle guiding and have to do a more authoritarian approach because he's not only disrupting his own education, but his peers. He goes on these manic like rants that sometimes make no sense, and it riles up other students in the classroom. He's always talked while doing work as it's how he processes things, but he's spewing his negative thoughts and mean comments about the aides/teacher out loud and it riles up the other students.

Yesterday, he came into school with a concerning attitude once again. The first thing he did was yell at another student to shut up. Our first assignment in the morning was to finish a picture of an incomplete picture of space. His picture was void of color and had black "demonic" creatures in it. He complained the entire way through it -- an ART assignment. He finished it in two minutes and I didn't know what to make of it. He's normally very creative, but his emotional brain was overpowering his creative brain and he had no desire to do it.

Then he was instructed to write 3-5 sentences of a story of what he drew. He spent five minutes writing one sentence and it made no sense. The teacher asked him to write a little more. He sighed and groaned. I asked if he wanted to take a break, and he said there was no point because it has to get done. I explained that it's true that he'll have to do it later, but he should not burn himself out and I could tell he was frustrated. Again, he said there was no point and sat down and continued complaining.

He wrote three more sentences; the last one being "Bro is cooked!" It was obvious that he did not care about the assignment at all. The teacher asked him to start over. He started manically ranting, calling us stupid, the school stupid, etc. I said that if we can't say nice things that we may have to go do our work outside. The teacher said something to that effect as well suggesting the principal's office. That's when he called her a bitch.

An aide said that he's gotta go so I said c'mon Jack, let's go to the principal's office. He was not compliant and continued muttering random things to himself. We were all nervous; Jack is a big kid, bigger than me, and can quickly snap and attack you. It's only happened one other time this year, but it's scary and fast. We called the principal down and he started talking to him. He gave the choice of either going with him to the office or calling his mom. That's when Jack suddenly got up and swung at the principal. He almost knocked him to the ground.

Long story short, he had to be restrained and he got suspended. I took my lunch break shortly after he was sent home and sobbed the whole time. I was extremely sad by what seems like he's suddenly regressing. I felt like a massive piece of shit because again, I'm in my first year of being a para, and I want to help him so bad but feel I'm not the most qualified to help (because i'm not lol). I really care so much for him and it's not like I'm going to give up on him, but I've got no clue on how to motivate him.

His home life is a mess. He lives with his younger neurotypical brother and his mom, and his mom is not around at all due to working. We've sent countless emails and I send her reports every single day that never get signed or looked at. His mom doesn't discipline him or parent him, and he's admitted that his younger brother is his caretaker.

my thoughts? he needs medication, as he has very little executive functioning, and/or occupational therapy. At the VERY least, someone to parent him at home. He needs his phone taken away at night so that he's not pulling all-nighters every night playing Roblox.

I feel defeated and upset. I want to do more and I WILL do more, doing research and such, trying to find new ways to improve his attitude, connect with him and improve his executive functioning skills. But fuck, I hate seeing him spiraling like this. He is a smart kid and has so much potential but he just doesn't care and has recognized that we can't actually *make* him do anything so he just won't. I want him to be set up for success. I sobbed on my break because I feel like I've failed him and I'm at a loss at the situation.

we had a para join our classroom in december last year, bringing her 1 to 1 student with her from another school. he had to transfer to our room because they didn't have an ERI room at his other school, and his behaviors were too extreme for the classroom he was in prior.

the thing is, he didn't have a single behavior for the first FOUR MONTHS he was here. he's autistic, and was diagnosed with early onset ODD. but he didn't display any behaviors that were like ODD. i'm telling you, he was the sweetest, cutest kid ever.

his para seemed to hate him and we didn't understand why. she would constantly call out, at least twice a week, and when she was with him she was on her phone, watching netflix, or sometimes SLEEPING in class. she would ignore him and didn't help out with the other kids in the classroom either. the same day that we reported her, she put in her two weeks notice. she absolutely did not give a fuck about her student.

everything changed a month after she quit. the behaviors started to show up. it started with just complaining about having to do work. then, he started doing property destruction type stuff, like attempting to chuck his laptop across the room. then, finally, the aggression and persistent negativity set in. we are finally seeing the ODD in him. and it's bad.

we are frustrated because he has become one of the worst kids in the classroom, and he has no aide. we all have students we are contracted to, and we are unable to give them the proper attention they need because of his explosive behavior. he is constantly needing to be restrained and then sent home, and then it's the same bullshit the next day. nothing seems to be being done at home.

yesterday, he got off the bus and immediately tried to run away. i was not present for this because i was tending to my 1 on 1 in the building, as he goes to a different homeroom in the morning. he was grabbed of course, he got his breakfast, and was being extremely hostile for no reason. he suddenly got up and attacked the sub, trying to bite and hit her. a case worker came in to take him out the classroom, and then he attacked him, throwing his breakfast at him.

after some time he came back to class. he immediately walked over and smacked a para. that was when he was sent home.

no demands were even placed on him the entire day. he has it set in his mind that we are all evil, and he just wants to hurt us. there is no reasoning with him, and preventative action does not work. he just wants to hurt us and hates us all. he has not been able to complete any work for the past week.

crazy thing is, they refuse to get us a new aide for him, as there are already "too many adults in that room." there are seven kids and four aides. in an ERI room where most are aggressive. also, the school year is almost over, so there's that.

i'm a first year para so i'm not sure if this is just common or what. but in my opinion, this kid should absolutely NOT be in a school setting. the kid needs to go to outpatient. he needs medication and therapy. it's gotten to a point where he is just angry and physical even if no demands are placed on him. he thinks that we are demonic.

his para failed him for sure. but she might've resented him because he probably acted like this at his previous school. i feel bad for the kid to some degree. but jesus he needs help. we can't do this shit every day for the rest of the year. what exactly is the line for getting kicked out of school??