u/ShawnOfEons

I might be stating the obvious here to most of you, but some think Jeff was better at physically playing guitar. This isn’t true. Jeff was better at song writing. I think Jeff was also better at soloing. Even though Slayer solos are just random noodling with whammy bar thrown in. Jeff’s leads always sounded smoother to me.

However, Kerry was the better rhythm player. Listen to any professional live recording, they always turned Kerry’s amp up louder because he was the tighter & more aggressive live player on rhythm guitar. I listened to a live recording of Postmortem for instance, Jeff wrote that song, but when they play it live, it sounds like he is barely palm muting the notes, I had to strain myself to hear him because Kerry’s guitar is louder. I think they admitted themselves that Kerry was better at playing the riffs. I think it’s obvious that Jeff was better at writing them.

That’s it. Just an opinion post and something I observed.

I might be stating the obvious here to most of you, but some think Jeff was better at physically playing guitar. This isn’t true. Jeff was better at song writing. I think Jeff was also better at soloing. Even though Slayer solos are just random noodling with whammy bar thrown in. Jeff’s leads always sounded smoother to me.

However, Kerry was the better rhythm player. Listen to any professional live recording, they always turned Kerry’s amp up louder because he was the tighter & more aggressive live player on rhythm guitar. I listened to a live recording of Postmortem for instance, Jeff wrote that song, but when they play it live, it sounds like he is barely palm muting the notes, I had to strain myself to hear him because Kerry’s guitar is louder. I think they admitted themselves that Kerry was better at playing the riffs. I think it’s obvious that Jeff was better at writing them.

That’s it. Just an opinion post and something I observed.

I understand women wanting to warn other women if a guy is a cheater, or if he’s married, or abusive etc.

That’s fine.

However, if a guy is not a cheater, not abusive, not creepy, just had one date that didn’t go that well, he can get put on blast for no good reason. All that is posted is the other person’s side and they can just blatantly lie or post their impression of him being awkward or whatever.

I was on hinge and Facebook dating for barely two weeks, and then I found out some one I matched with, posted me in an “are we dating the same guy” Facebook group, and it’s a huge group with tens of thousands of women.

The post about me had two comments. Both were from women I went on dates with over a year ago, the last time I tried online dating. One of them said that I was very sweet and nice, which was nice of her to say and I appreciate that.

The other one said that on one date with me, I came of desperate, and said that I talked bad about an ex, and that I seem like a mama’s boy and no life. She totally misrepresented me and took things out of context. What happened was, she told me about a bad ex experience and I told her mine, maybe I should have kept quiet about that, but we are both guilty of talking about an ex. Also, I call my mom a lot because my mother has health issues and it concerns me that she may not be around much longer. So I guess this makes me a red flag? I don’t think so, but I have no way to correct the woman’s bad mouthing me when I did nothing wrong. The group is women only so I cannot comment in it.

A female friend showed me the screenshots

Any one I try to talk to on a dating app now, may just unmatch me or cancel, if they looked me up in that group, just because of one comment. One less than flattering comment is all it takes, no matter if it’s true or out of context or not.

I feel like those groups should be there to warn about dangerous men. Not misleading or talking bad about a guy that didn’t do anything wrong other than maybe had a bad date.

Yes I’m serious. She really says that. She thinks I’m “too attractive” and claims that I can do better. I assure her she’s fine, but … Honestly there is a part of me that really does feels like I settled, but I didn’t think I was out of her league until she started saying it. For context: We have had similar health issues in the past. When I found out we were both formerly obese, and we both lost weight and got healthy. I thought that makes us a good match. We both look good now and coincidentally have the same exact diet.

The difference is, she used to be a lot bigger and she currently has loose skin. I don’t. That’s the one physical turn off about her. Her face is very pretty. She has no plans to have surgery to deal with the lose skin. So it’s something I’m trying to get used to. She is insecure about it but she is scared of surgery and doesn’t plan to ever have that changed.

Personality wise, she is the best woman I ever dated. We have similar interests and we get along great, but the physical attraction isn’t all the way there. I’ve dated physically hotter women, but those relationships weren’t compatible personality wise. Am I being shallow? I didn’t think there was an issue at first, it was more in the back of my mind, but she keeps saying herself that she doesn’t look good enough and that I can do better.

It’s getting to the point where I’m starting to believe it. I’m not about to break up with her because that would be cruel and I know she would be devastated. She says she loves me, and I don’t want to break her heart. So I don’t plan to break things off, but I admit I really wish she would do something about the lose skin, because it really is a turn off. Am I an asshole for feeling like that? How can I get past this? I feel like it’s starting to affect me, and she keeps validating it by what she says about herself.

And no, before you ask, she had no knowledge of what my past exes names were, so she couldn’t have looked them up, and my exes wouldn’t have looked her up either because my FB is private, I never have my relationship status public or friends list viewable. I’m not still friends with exes. They don’t have any mutual friends in common at all.

What makes things weirder, is that some of the women that popped up on her friend suggestions were women I chatted with on the phone (that I met from online dating) before I met her.

I know this because we were hanging out one day, she had her Facebook open and a friend suggestion (on her FB) was a woman I dated in the past. I thought it was odd. Then she showed me her other FB recommendations and there were past exes of mine or women I went on a date with before. Again, like I said, she didn’t know these women and they didn’t have mutual friends in common. Not even me, because I wasn’t in their FB friends list.

Is Facebook recommending past people that communicated with me via my phone number to other people on my fb friends list? Because that’s literally the only reason I can think of. If this is true, it seems very crazy for this to happen, and kind of creepy.

The dungeons in this game are like a giant maze, and in some quests, I get get so damn frustrated, going through them for hours, trying to find whatever beast I’m supposed to take down or character I’m supposed to save. Freaking HOURS sometimes, and the map system sucks. I get so frustrated it makes me want to rage quit the game.

Why did they have to make the dungeons so long and confusing to navigate?

I (42M) have gone back to the online dating apps early this month. After a week of flakey unengaging conversations, and some face time calls where the women didn’t look the same as their pictures (that I didn’t meet). I finally found one that led to a date. She (40F) is very nice and she’s cute, but we only met twice and she is already wanting me to decide if we are going to be exclusive or not. I’m unsure, because I don’t think 2 dates is enough to know yet.

We haven’t done anything beyond eating together, walking around, talking, oh and we held hands. She seems like a good woman, but she told me that after our 3rd date (which is later tonight) she thinks we shouldn’t see each other again until I tell her I want us to be in a relationship. She said she already likes me too much and it will break her heart if I don’t want to go exclusive. She said that seeing me more will cause her to feel more attached, so she wants to put the breaks on a 4th date until it’s decided we are a couple.

Is this normal? I feel pressure now. I like her, but I also think, what if there is some one else more compatible for me? Should I put all my eggs in one basket with this one? Now there are two other women suddenly on the app that are interested. Should I turn them down and just focus on this one that already wants to be with me? I like her, but if I pick her, I will blow away whatever other opportunity there might be (that could be better). However, if I decide to go on other dates (with anyone else), this one (I already met) will be upset and break things off. The other ones might not turn out to be good options, and I will have lost my chance with the previous one, I haven’t given anyone else a chance though.

What do I do in this situation? Any advice?

I (M42) have been back to online dating for about a week. I’ve had a good number of matches and conversations, but I haven’t met anyone in person yet.

The few women that have a lot of interest in meeting, I found out that they don’t look like their pictures. Luckily I was able to find out without even meeting them in person.

I just had a FaceTime with a woman last night. On the live video, she looks 50 pounds larger and her face was much older looking. Another woman I’ve been talking to, I looked her up and found out that she has a YouTube channel & instagram. She does live videos. I could tell in her videos she is much larger than how she looked on her dating profile, and again her face looked much older. So I was able to bow out of meeting her too (before wasting my time). These aren’t just small differences, these are big differences from how they represent themselves on the dating app vs off of it.

I know it’s not just women that do this, men do it too, but I can only speak from my perspective of a guy interested in women. So, in general, why are people still using angle tricks and much older photos? You should advertise yourself accurately. Now it’s even worse with ai/filters. If you do this, you’re setting yourself up for failure unless you never plan to meet the person irl.

I have been back to online dating (as a guy) for about a week. I’ve had a good number of matches and conversations, but I haven’t met anyone in person yet.

The few women that have a lot of interest in meeting, I found out that they don’t look like their pictures. Luckily I was able to find out without even meeting them in person.

I just had a FaceTime with a woman last night. On the live video, she looks 50 pounds larger and her face was much older looking. Another woman I’ve been talking to, I looked her up and found out that she has a YouTube channel & instagram. She does live videos. I could tell in her videos she is much larger than how she looked on her dating profile, and again her face looked much older. So I was able to bow out of meeting her too (before wasting my time).

I know it’s not just women that do this, men do it too, but I can only speak from my perspective of a guy interested in women. So, in general, why are people still using angle tricks and much older photos? You should advertise yourself accurately. Now it’s even worse with ai/filters. If you do this, you’re setting yourself up for failure unless you never plan to meet the person irl.

I’m not exactly looking forward to it, because I remember how it was the last few times I was on the dating apps. I’m a decently attractive guy, average height and I have a good job. Nice and respectful, I never got sexual or creepy in any messages at all, or on dates, and I’m looking for something serious. I remember in the past, I got a lot of matches. A ton. However, most of the women were always “too busy” to go on a date, or they acted interested, only to flake or ghost when I offer my number or want to meet in person. Even for just a coffee date, to even see if we have chemistry.

I feel like they just swipe right because they think “ok he’s cute enough.” Then that’s it. They have no intention for it to go anywhere. That’s been most of them. Probably only like 5-10% of the matches actually resulted in a date (or two or three), which is better than nothing. Then I find out they don’t look like their pics, or the in person chemistry is not there like it was on the phone, and it’s on to the next.

I took time off from the dating apps, because I was seeing some one but it didn’t work out. We were just way too different, nothing in common at all. I also wanted time to myself for a while after that.

(For more context: The apps I tried the most were: FacebookDating, Bumble and Hinge)

I’m probably asking the obvious here, but are the apps getting any better since a year ago?