u/Theseus_The_King

From what I understand Orthodox Jews have a time called Niddha where the woman needs to immerse in the Mikvah after her period is done. What happens after menopause? Is there a final Mikvah ceremony, or a symbolic final immersion when a woman is confirmed post menopausal? How did Halakah ascertain when a woman was officially postmenopausal ?

There’s a lot of talk about BYB of bullies contributing to attacks and BE’s, and unwanted bullies and bully mixes clogging shelters. Are there any ethical bully breeders here (whether that is ABPT, Staffordshires, AmStaffs and the like), and do you feel ethically bred bullies could be part of the solution of improving the breed reputation? Does BSL worsen the quality of bully breeds by forcing people to underground BYBs?

I saw some interest in a comment I made here and I want to get more thoughts on what can be done for this:

In the past, “adopt don’t shop” was a viable way to get a nice mutt family dog for companionship. There were lots of village dogs and oops litters from working breeds and land races out in the country. But thankfully, spay-neuter became more common, leading to less of these mutts in shelters.

Meanwhile, after the Michael Vick case, no kill became more popular, and shelters stopped euthanizing dogs with histories of reactivity. Rescues also made deals with shelters to quickly pull adoptable dogs from the floor and adopt them out with very prohibitive criteria and jacked up fees.

As a result, what the average person encounters at a shelter is far less adoptable than what was found 20 years ago. Shelters are filled to the brim with pitbulls and bully breed mixes with questionable histories, with the odd husky or Shepard mix, or geriatric Chihuahua with high medical needs. In many areas, “adopt don’t shop” is starting to sound a lot like “get a reactive BYB pitbull with a bite history”. That isn’t to say every pitty/bully, or husky/shepard is unadoptable, or reactive, but many are, and even if not they are not first time dogs and need to be in experienced hands that many non experienced owners can’t provide. Shelters also have a habit of lying about breed (“lab mix” or “chihuahua mix” that’s 90 lbs by 2 yrs old and gets sent back) which has also damaged trust.

If shelters are no longer a reliable place to find a serviceable family dog, where do people go, to get a dog that doesn’t cost an arm and a leg or demand a laundry list things a first time owner may not have like 10 years of experience with the breed, an adult always home, or an orchard of rare fruits.

Some turn to rehoming groups— but often the dogs needing rehoming aren’t that different than the reactive bullies in the shelter, and decent family dogs go fast. Ethical breeders tend to promote themselves in insular shows and circles, and on more publically accessible places like FB marketplace or Craigslist you find lots of doodles and BYB purebreds— and these have largely replaced the sweet shelter mutts of yore. Doodle demand is driven by their accessibility, and the fact the average joe doesn’t care for breed standards and showings, only “it it cute” “is it sweet”, “can it do basic family dog things.

Adopt don’t shop ain’t what it used to be. If we really want to make ethical dogs more accessible for people in an era where shelters are not viable anymore, how can we improve visibility, accessiblity, and awareness of ethical dogs so that first time owners have easier entry and people who primarily want dogs for companionship aren’t iced out? It’s a frustrating situation for want to be owners, many of whom stay petless or go cat instead as a result.

I felt mine chose me, he just kind of showed up in my life when I was ready to learn what I had to. I didn’t choose the Mortefi life, the Mortefi life chose me. Some people seem to have active chosen a yume. If you did, how and why?

I’m a 30H/32G/34F (my band size is an odd number so it’s not exact) and I want to know if there are any reputable bras at this size on Amazon that don’t break the bank. I am wearing a plunge neckline on my sisters wedding and I want to see what bras are available there, knowing that it’s hard to trust what you see especially when I have the unique “privilege” of being full bust but not plus sized (40-27-40) and manufacturers don’t think I exist.

My mom was here trying to squeeze me in a 34DD and scoffing why I can’t just buy any size off there like her and I was like no that’s not how this works. She thinks my boobs will shrink to a normal size if I put down the fork (I’m 32, 5’2” almost and like 128 lbs (?) Not sure but I’m not obese) and I’m like 🤦🏽‍♀️

General question out of curiosity sake but how are new breeds of dog developed? All the existing breeds didn’t come out of nowhere, did they splinter off from purpose breeding ancestral breeds or did they come from mixing old breeds until they “bred true”? Is it ever possible for a new breed to truly and ethically be developed in modern times?

Sometimes I feel I struggle with my yume ships because now as I’m actually partnered, I know the ways in which yume cannot possibly hope to replicate the actual experience of living with a partner. For example, I will never have to reorganize my life around Mortefis work schedule, and I will never have to consider how Jyuto may be caught in the crossfire or affected by anything I say or any choice I make. Zayne snores and I take out my headphones. My actual partner snores and I put them in.

Yume was able to prepare me very well emotionally for partnership, but I feel more of a learning curve with practicalities. I feel it’s almost a taboo topic to talk about bc a lot of people don’t like to think about the limitations of fantasies vs what reality entails, and I feel alone in my position and experience where you have to renegotiate Yume in a new phase of life. I was never a Riako, but I still feel that my relationship with Yume is changing and I feel almost lost as a result.

Has anyone else had to navigate this, especially in the 25-30+ bracket?

I don’t know if this needs a triggering warning bc I’ve seen some Australian sources refer to avoidance topics as triggering (am a non Australian)

I saw that some mobs don’t name or show images of the deceased, but I also heard there are other people or topics you don’t refer to directly. Which topics are those? How do you discuss those topics and does it vary by sub group?

Thank you all so much, I apologize if I’m not supposed to ask this or this question is dumb !!

He was one of my closest friends. We met three years ago at a gaming event. He was new to our city and I introduced him to my group. Things went swimmingly for almost two years, so many fantastic memories and events.

Then, I broke up with my ex. Two months after he tells me I liked him. I said no, we’re great friends but he isn’t my type. It seemed like he took No for an answer.

Until I started dating my partner.

The sweet, friendly guy was almost overnight replaced by a mopey, whiny incel. He constantly complained women reject him for his height, said his money and job meant he did everything right, he shouldn’t need to put effort into his appearance and charm, and women were all shallow for not paying attention to him. He told my friend he hoped my bf would just be a 6 month situationship or fling, drank himself into a stupor, and blamed us for having to up his antidepressants.

I was ready to be done in December. But my bf suggested we give him one last chance. I relented. We had an ultimatum talk with him. For a while, there seemed to be progress.

It turns out he lied. He only went to therapy a few times. He was still privately obsessed with me. He made incel comments about my other friend’s age, weight, job and height. He made comments wondering when me and my bf would break up. But you can only pretend for so long. Things circle back.

Yesterday I realized there was no other option. He was beyond anyone’s help. I sat him down, and gave him the Notice of Termination. I pride myself in being able to keep a cool head for difficult conversations, but it’s not like I enjoy doing them. He was a mess by the end of it. I was expecting as such, but still.

I wish there was another option, 3 years down the drain like that. But he left me none. I wish he took my first no as an answer. But from what I’ve seen, it seems like a unicorn man bites dog outcome.

I made the right choice. I had to. But I wish it didn’t have to come to this.

The provincial government has my old address (my parents house) in Peel Region, and I’ve been summoned for jury selection in Brampton. I live about 45 km away from the courthouse in Toronto, and since I do not have a car, it will be at least a 90 minute commute. In addition, I pay rent, and am worried about lost work time.

Has anyone ever been in a similar situation? Do I have a case for undue hardship due to distance? Will they ask for anything to show proof of new address? Or do they tend to dismiss jurors who reside outside Peel? I really don’t know how I can be a juror for a trial so far from my place.

I was having a thought, and was wondering how in regions where female feticide is or was prevalent, a factor contributing to TFR decline could be a male skewed sex ratio.

South Korea in the 1980s had a very high instance of female feticide. This started to improve in the 1990s, and by the late 2000s, ratios were close to normalized. This may not have been an immediate issue, but when the 1980s born cohort aged into marriage in the 2010s, they were short a significant number of marriage aged females. If a good chunk of your men are numerically locked out of marriage or partnering, it can be hard to have enough babies to replace your population. Now that the cohorts with better sex ratios are reaching marriage age, it’ll be interesting to see if we see some even modest recovery in marriage rates and TFR as a result. South Koreas TFR has started to trend modestly up, and these more balanced cohorts may be driving it in part.

India and China have a further way to go. Female feticide began to slow in China as the one child policy relaxed, but it will take some time before the more normalized cohort enters marriageablity, and people raised without the cultural messaging of the one child policy. India still practices significant levels of female feticide, and more and more male skewed cohorts compete for fewer and fewer females. There are villages that have not seen a girl born or live past childhood for years. Indias fertility has started to decline, and if they do not stop female feticide entirely, there may be nothing standing in the way of total collapse. Some estimates suggest as many as 50 million women are missing from Indias population— and that was in 2002. That’s 50 million plus excess men who numerically face nearly no prospect of ever marrying, and therefore replacing themselves.

Now female feticide doesn’t explain TFR entirely. But it may be an overlooked factor in countries where it is and was prevalent. As one man can get many women pregnant, but a woman is pregnant for nine months by only one man, a society with a male skewed ratio is inherently more challenged than a female skew (as seen after wars, which often led to the opposite, baby booms). Female skewed cohorts are short sharp shocks, male skewed ones are long, insidious declines driven by societal factors disadvantaging women to the point a daughter is a liability a family is unwilling to take.

I used to be a yume shipper, but stopped because I was unsure if it would fit my current phase of life. After thinking over, I feel it still can be good for me, but I want to have access to spaces that suit my motivations for Yume.

The way I enjoy Yume best is when I am around doubles, because I feel I learn more about myself, my f/o, and I’ve even gained insight on former partners/avoiding mistakes made in previous relationships, like getting a Birds Eye view. I’m not one for oshikatsu, and I feel stifled by non sharing based environments, and “anti ship” ones (whatever that means).
An added plus would be if there’s a lot of 25+ yumes, as I’m almost 32, and want a more mature space.

While I get some yumes may want more Riako/Nonsharing/“unproblematic” spaces, that’s not my vibe, and I just want to find a server or group that suits me. I’ve had trouble finding one though, if any similar minded sharing yumes know any, let me know

So, I recently found my 3DS, and it’s in remarkably good condition despite being ~15 years old. My bf wanted to see what I had saved in the photos and I found some incredible memories from 2011-12, baby pictures of my cousins who are now in high school/ going to college, my sister in elementary school (getting married this year), and me in high school. There’s even pics of a trip back to my home country and my grandparents house back there, and my grandfathers on both sides and they passed in 2021, 2023. I want to copy and transfer the pictures so my dad can have a copy, but there are few modern devices that support the SD card I have in there anymore. My best bet I figure could be to send a copy from the device to my email or other acc.

How can I copy/transfer the photos on the device to a computer or send them to an email if possible? If I don’t have anything else that can read that SD card anymore. Thanks !

As the person who suggested a lot of the flairs, I came up with a new one that may fit some of these:

“Now I ain’t sayin she a gold digger 💸”

This one would be for cases where the AP has a financial motive for the affair (ie sugar baby, MM is paying for something, AP is motivated to go legit due to MM’s money). What do you all think of this one ?