u/archivedroses

I understand that it should be encouraged to ask for help when you need it, but am I a bad friend for getting annoyed when my friend asks for help for things she can easily solve herself? Like it takes one Google search to find the answer, why do I have to google it for you and text you back the answer? Of course I help her with anything she needs and I mask my irritation so she has no idea but I feel conflicted because I want to help her but at the same time she needs to be self reliant. I grew up solving issues myself or to the best of my ability BEFORE reaching out for help. Seriously why can’t people even TRY to help themselves before asking another person.

Ex: She wanted to know how to turn off notifications for certain people on Life360. I literally opened up Life360, hit settings, notifications, and it was the first option that popped up. Or for college applications, she asks me where to find UC PIQ questions… It’s literally the first thing that comes up when you google it. (It would’ve been different if she was asking if those questions were the right ones, but that’s not the case.)

Honestly I feel like it’s because she’s the type of person to do the bare minimum, slack, and use AI whenever anything gets even SLIGHTLY difficult. Seriously, we both attended a meeting about a beneficial program to help with college preparedness but she only used it so she can get out of a class she doesn’t like, and then asks me multiple times about how the program worked when we literally went to the meeting that explained everything.

And then she gives me shit for not being “socially aware” for little things as if I’m supposed to be telepathic and know everything she’s thinking. Which she brings up ALL the time. Like if you tell me to look and we’re in a room full of people, who the hell do I look at? Maybe get some problem solving and critical thinking skills before telling me I’m unaware.

I made a few iCloud email aliases and I want to switch everything onto them and then stop using/giving out my primary iCloud email. Is there a way to figure out all of the things my email is linked to and switch them over or do I have to do it all one by one?

Also how should I go about removing my email/deleting an account from an old website that now only redirects to scams. I don’t want to accidentally press anything and get malware and I definitely don’t want my email to be available there.

Just discovered this was a thing after going into a paranoia frenzy because my sister’s google account got hacked and now I’m ramping up my security.

I’ve been using my main iCloud email for pretty much everything but now I made two aliases. One with my real name for signing up for memberships/rewards/to give to people (I’m going to try and transfer all of my primary email stuff onto this one) and another as a recovery email that I can link up to all my gmails.

After that I’m going to try to never use my primary email again as to not compromise my Apple ID and everything connected to it.

Will this work? How safe will this make my gmail accounts?

My sister got hacked and her Google account got deleted. Now we are both paranoid.

Is it a good idea to make an email SOLELY for the purpose of using it as a recovery email? Like an email that you NEVER use for anything so that there’s no chance it gets hacked?

Recently my sister got her Discord hacked because her friend got hacked and sent her a link about testing a game which she believed because coincidentally they were a game developer themself. This caused her to start sending out the same link to others on the discord, kick the administrators out of her discord server so no one could do anything, and hold her Gmail account hostage, demanding money from her. Eventually she didn’t comply and the Gmail account got deleted/parental controls got switched on so she lost access to everything her Gmail was attached to. She was able to change the passwords and emails of whatever she could, so for now, it’s just her discord and Gmail that is lost.

I heard you can contact team YouTube on X to try and get the Gmail back but she says the account isn’t accepting DMs right now. Is there anything else she can do to get her accounts back??

When I was younger I went to a chiropractor who did some X-rays and said I have hip dysplasia (I’m not 100% if this is accurate because it was a long time ago). I never got the X-rays sent to me but I just went off of her word.

What makes me think I have hip dysplasia is I feel like my hips get in the way of moving my legs towards my chest. I physically cannot pull my thigh/knee up to my chest and when I do I can hear and feel a little pop/crack. I feel like because of where my hips are, my leg cannot move any higher because the bone is blocking it. It doesn’t feel like a muscle is straining, I only feel discomfort at the bone and no matter how hard I pull, it doesn’t move past a certain point. I’ve tried everything but I have a feeling it’s physically impossible to get my thigh to meet my chest.

Is this a sign of hip dysplasia or is it something else?

Hello!
My uncle has a red eared slider that’s about 15 years old named Swaggerz (I named him cause he didn’t have a name for YEARS).

A few times a year I’ll baby sit his turtle in which he brings him over to my house and then we put him in a 20 gallon (it’s small, I know. That’s why I want to make sure if I take over care for him, I’ll do everything right).

At home he is in a 60 gallon tank (which I’ll get) with a little loft that it sits inside the tank (it’s not the one that goes on top) but the loft is pretty small so I’m definitely upgrading it. I’m thinking of getting the “thrive terrarium elevated basking loft” which sits on top of the tank. As for the filter, I’m unsure about the brand of the filter he uses at home but I might change it when the time comes! (I use a smaller one when I babysit)

It’s still a big IF whether he’s moving or not so when the decision is actually made, I’ll 100% do deeper research on my own. For now I’d like advice, suggestions, or anything that might help from this community!

Some questions I have now:

1. Is 60 gallons adequate?
2. Heat bulb, domes, and UVB bulb suggestions?
3. Is a water heater necessary?
4. Best substrate and decor?
5. - Right now both of his tanks have no decorations or substrate because my uncle claims he tries to eat everything.
6. Diet? (He eats dried shrimp and pellets currently)

Also if anyone has both a red eared slider and a bearded dragon, please let me know if there’s any notably similarities or differences between taking care of them! (Whether it be lighting, distance from light, diet) I have a beardie of my own and have never had an aquatic animal so it’s definitely new territory for me. I’m worried I might have a beardie-mindset since that’s what I’m used to!

Thanks!

I’m interested in joining the army through the ROTC route, maybe doing SMP, and then hopefully commission as active duty. I don’t plan on spending my entire life in the military and instead want to get out after my contract is up, join law enforcement, and work towards becoming a crime scene investigator (I’m majoring in biology).

I know active duty is highly competitive and so I want to know if attempting to go active is actually worth it? Or should I just go into reserves and then right out of college try for the law enforcement/CSI job?

(I am interested in active duty because I feel like then I’d be fulfilling my job in the military by doing some time active and plus it’ll give me new opportunities and experiences to meet new people and do new things.)

As a rising senior in high school, my life is going to start changing a lot. I’ve always had a drive to want to do different things, take up different hobbies, etc, but honestly it’s exhausting having so many dreams and not enough motivation. The only thing I’m really good at is writing and school, but even then I don’t do much that is impressive. I also don’t feel proud when I get an achievement or something, I just feel relieved because I didn’t fail. (My parents are very supportive of me but I feel like it’s my duty to succeed and I can’t let them down)

Now is about the time where I absolutely need to go out of my comfort zone, get a part-time job, survive college, and get a proper career in line. I feel that I am a slow learner and I am scared to fail, yet I know I need to in order to improve. When I think about my future, I don’t have confidence. I want all these things but when it comes down to it I always think “but can I really do all that?” I know I have to start somewhere and I’ll learn eventually, but I feel like this low confidence is messing with my mental health. I don’t feel capable yet my heart wants to do so much. Even with the hobbies that I love to do, things like drawing or playing guitar, I’m not that good at so I end up getting even more frustrated and question if all this effort is even worth it.

Can anyone relate or give advice? How the hell do I raise my confidence and become a faster learner so I’m not facing failure all the time?

I was wondering if anyone has heard anything about the medieval times in Buena Park after the whole strike thing. I recently went and didn’t find out about the situation until afterwards, nevertheless I had an amazing time and loved chatting with the knights after the show. I’ve always wanted to work there and this last visit reinforced my desire but not if the environment/management is toxic and animals are still being abused. Did they improve or change anything after the strike?

Hi, I’ve always loved going to medieval times as a kid and just recently went again last night. I absolutely loved it as always and even talked with and got autographs from all the knights! I was wondering what working at the Buena Park medieval times is like as I feel it’d be a fun place to work at.

Are the horses treated well? Is pay fair? How is the work environment? Can women become squires/knights? Best position outside of squire/knight? Work hours? Etc!

Thanks!

Hi! I’m a rising high school senior looking to do army rotc in college alongside a biology major. I’ve been researching and I’m also thinking of maybe going through the SMP program.

I was wondering if anyone here had any advice or could share some experiences with me, whether it be about rotc, SMP, or as being officer. I know the military experience can be very different for women compared to men so I want to ask here instead of the general army Reddit.

For reference, I’m 5’3 and I barely workout but I’ve been working on it! This is something I really want to do and I know it won’t be easy but I’m willing to push through. Let me know how PT was for you guys and some fitness goals I should set!

I want to know what I’m walking into so anything helps!

I’ve always loved the idea of finding evidence, analyzing it, and putting together the puzzle pieces. Before I go to college, I need to decide if this path is truly worth it for me.

From what I’ve heard so far, you have to become a patrol cop first and then work your way up to become a true investigator/detective. I’ve also heard that the pay isn’t that good and hours can bleed overtime.

My other choice is to be a crime scene investigator (I’m probably going to major in biology anyways since criminal justice and criminology are useless degrees) but still start out as a patrol cop.

Is it worth it? Should I put aside my dream jobs and just go with careers that are more in demand?

I’m not talking about intuition or having the feeling that something bad is going to happen. I’m talking about knowing how something SHOULD be done and physically feeling weird when it isn’t done right. It’s hard to explain but I’ll try my best.

The best example I have right now I discovered through my love for animating and video editing. In these hobbies I often deal with putting layers, sound effects, and music together where timing has to match up. If I make a mistake and an audio is even a half a second off of what I know it should be, I can feel it in my chest. It goes away after a little bit but comes back EVERY TIME I rewatch it.
The only true cure is fixing the video.

This also happens when I’m watching other people’s videos. Like a friend of mine created an ad for our journalism class and the music she used had an obvious climax which she appropriately lined up to a certain scene but even so it was just slightly off (no shade).

This happens with my body too. Sometimes my foot or another body part will randomly feel like it needs to be cracked or twisted a certain way. Except no matter what I do it doesn’t go back to feeling right. What makes it even worse is thinking about it (my entire body is uncomfortable right now just because I’m thinking of all this).

I have no idea what this is or if other people feel it too. I don’t even know what to google if I were to search it up so I’m asking here. I’d like to add that this is different from my reaction to what I would describe as posts made to the mildly infuriating Reddit. Mistakes in patterns and stuff like that bothers me but not like this. Also I can’t really describe the feeling…

Does anyone know what I’m talking about??

I hate being a liar.
I compulsively lie about little things, usually to save myself from embarrassment or talking about something I don’t wanna discuss. They’re mostly harmless things that no one will ever really know about, such as lying about what I’m currently doing or thinking about. But other times it feels like these little lies are bigger than that and I get called out.

An example (as pathetic as this is) is I accidentally reacted to one of my own messages and quickly removed it but the other person still saw. I panicked and when they started making fun of me, I lied saying it was a glitch and kept doubling down even when they said to stop gaslighting them. Afterwards I felt terrible. I was in the moment and quickly went to saving my image instead of just sucking it up and having a laugh. Now I feel like my friend thinks I’m a liar and I can’t be trusted anymore because I’m lying about little things like this.

And I don’t think it’s just lies. I think I truly have an ego problem.

As a girl who never had a girly childhood, I never got into makeup until high school. At that point, I knew a bit but not enough. My friend on the other hand is very experienced with makeup and skincare. She gave me a suggestion because I was having eye pain and said it might be what I was putting on my lashes. Instead of accepting her advice I got defensive. I don’t know why, and again, I felt terrible afterwards. Eventually I owned up to it and took her advice, apologizing to her. I’m unsure as to why I take things so personally sometimes.

Another thing I’ve noticed is that since I grew up to be independent, I sometimes get frustrated with those who can’t do anything without having their hand held or who can’t do the simplest of tasks. I try to be empathetic and I really hate judging people, but sometimes it just happens.

I can be impulsive, defensive, judgmental, and a chronic liar and I hate it all.

Is there anything I can do?

I want to go into criminal investigation or crime scene investigating after military service. I’ve taken a few criminal justice/concepts of criminal law classes to get myself familiar with the system but I know majoring in criminal justice/criminology is not the way to go.

Since I’d probably become a patrol officer before making my way into criminal/crime scene investigation, I feel like my major isn’t too important right away but will be useful later on.

Is biology the way to go in the case that I do decide I want to go to crime scene investigation instead of criminal? (even though it’s generally hard to find other jobs with bio degrees) I know there’s also programs to train in crime scene photography, evidence collection, etc which I think would be good to do with a biology background.

Alongside biology, I’m thinking of doing a minor in psychology, Spanish, or accounting. Which minor would help me the most?

I’m a rising highschool senior who is interested in doing army ROTC in college. I’m a girl who’s never been that athletic. I only did regular PE (freshman/sophomore year) no sports, etc and I don’t go to the gym.

For about a year I’ve been doing pushups which I’ve gotten decent at and I’m trying to get a consistent workout routine but I’m working on it. (Hopefully I’ll be able to hit the gym soon and really commit) For a few months I’ve been running in the morning with my friend and while we aren’t the fastest, we are improving. Shooting to run every other day for the rest of the summer and hopefully do a 5k in October.

What would be a good fitness goal to work towards before I do ROTC? I want to be as prepared as possible, especially since I’m a girl and not super athletic. I don’t want to be severely behind. Thanks!

I know ROTC focuses mainly on leadership and other skills but I’m wondering if hand-to-hand or melee combat is a thing they teach you too? Or if there will be opportunities to learn these skills later on down the line?

Would It be better to major in human biology or regular biology?

I want to become a crime scene investigator but even if I don’t become a CSI, I’d imagine that knowing about the human body and everything can come in handy. All of my other career interests (law enforcement, criminal investigation, or military) have some degree of risk in it too so I’d feel reassured that I’ll at least have some knowledge and be able to help if something were to happen.

Or should I go broad and go with just biology?

I want to be a criminal investigator, crime scene investigator, or potentially go to the FBI. I know criminal justice/criminology is essentially useless so I’m thinking of going into biology. I feel like it would help with investigation and give me other career options if it doesn’t work out.

Another choice was chemistry but it wasn’t really my strong suit in high school so I don’t really want to major in that and I’ve heard computer science or accounting is a really good major for this field but I’m not really interested in either… Should I just suck it up and major in one of those?

On the side note, I do want to do army ROTC so I don’t want too difficult of a major.